A.N. Yay! My hectic life is never over! I've been busy with our school musical (pit band kicks ass!), so I haven't done any writing, but since the musical was over this weekend...I've got time!
Thanks to all my reviewers!
And thanks to Elena who has translated my fic into russian!
Chapter 11
Hermione was the first to speak. Of course, it took quite awhile for that to happen.
"Sev-v-verus, I think we need to go see Dumbledore."
"This once, I think I agree," and with that, they hurried to Dumbledore, who, of course, was waiting for them in front of his office.
"Good evening. Up late, aren't we?"
"Of course, we're up late. We just had a visit from Lucius Malfoy!" Hermione all but screamed.
"Maybe we should try our inside voices, Hermione. Others do sleep in this castle. It isn't as sound proof as you might like."
"Sorry, Albus."
"Now, why don't we go discuss this in my office? Maybe even have a nice cup of cocoa?" The couple nodded uncertainly. "That's what I thought. Now, go on," he shooed the pair in front of him.
The walk up the stairs took much less time when thoughts of copulating and pregnancy were the only things on your mind.
After Dumbledore had called for hot cocoa from the house elves, he observed the unusual couple. They fidgeted and would not look each other in the eyes.
"Well, we don't have all night, now, do we?" He kindly interrupted them.
"No, sir," Hermione answered, unsure of what to tell him.
The room silenced for several more minutes until Severus rapidly explained their predicament.
"Lucius Malfoy visited us tonight and told us we have a year to have a child. Meaning that we have actually 3 months to well..." he traveled off.
"I'm almost finished with my schooling! I don't want to be pregnant." Hermione obviously did not find the idea any more thrilling then wiping Voldemort's arse. (Credit to Bridget Jone's Diary..)
"Hermione, you have until June, before you must be pregnant."
"So I can finish off schooling?"
"Obviously," Snape's sarcastic voice added.
"Well, its March. I'm not quite sure how to approach this. I mean, certainly, people have been pregnant before. Just not in this situation. I think its best if you attempt it," Dumbledore said.
"Look," Hermione said trying to get Severus' attention, "we need to stop tiptoeing around the tulips. How about we just say the word sex and get it over with?"
"I think, Mrs. Snape, you need to settle you arse down."
"Sex." Dumbledore said with a cheery grin on his face. "Severus, try it. Say it. Say it loud. Say it proud! SEX!"
"Common, Mr. Snape. Just say it."
There was a slight mumble from Snape.
"A little bit louder now?"
"Sex," he still said in a whisper.
"A little bit louder now!"
"Sex."
"A little bit louder now!"
"SEX!" He screamed with a vicious look on his face.
Hermione giggled, "A little bit softer now..."
Of course, Severus didn't understand the big to do about her saying a little bit softer now.
"Muggle song, Severus," Dumbledore added.
"I think that there are more important things at the moment than muggle songs at the moment."
"Right you are. Well, I think the easy way to solve this problem is for you to experiment with what you like best. Under precautions though. And then in June, try to procreate."
Hermione looked at Severus. Severus, of course, glared back with full intensity.
They were going to have sex.
Thanks to all my reviewers!
And thanks to Elena who has translated my fic into russian!
Chapter 11
Hermione was the first to speak. Of course, it took quite awhile for that to happen.
"Sev-v-verus, I think we need to go see Dumbledore."
"This once, I think I agree," and with that, they hurried to Dumbledore, who, of course, was waiting for them in front of his office.
"Good evening. Up late, aren't we?"
"Of course, we're up late. We just had a visit from Lucius Malfoy!" Hermione all but screamed.
"Maybe we should try our inside voices, Hermione. Others do sleep in this castle. It isn't as sound proof as you might like."
"Sorry, Albus."
"Now, why don't we go discuss this in my office? Maybe even have a nice cup of cocoa?" The couple nodded uncertainly. "That's what I thought. Now, go on," he shooed the pair in front of him.
The walk up the stairs took much less time when thoughts of copulating and pregnancy were the only things on your mind.
After Dumbledore had called for hot cocoa from the house elves, he observed the unusual couple. They fidgeted and would not look each other in the eyes.
"Well, we don't have all night, now, do we?" He kindly interrupted them.
"No, sir," Hermione answered, unsure of what to tell him.
The room silenced for several more minutes until Severus rapidly explained their predicament.
"Lucius Malfoy visited us tonight and told us we have a year to have a child. Meaning that we have actually 3 months to well..." he traveled off.
"I'm almost finished with my schooling! I don't want to be pregnant." Hermione obviously did not find the idea any more thrilling then wiping Voldemort's arse. (Credit to Bridget Jone's Diary..)
"Hermione, you have until June, before you must be pregnant."
"So I can finish off schooling?"
"Obviously," Snape's sarcastic voice added.
"Well, its March. I'm not quite sure how to approach this. I mean, certainly, people have been pregnant before. Just not in this situation. I think its best if you attempt it," Dumbledore said.
"Look," Hermione said trying to get Severus' attention, "we need to stop tiptoeing around the tulips. How about we just say the word sex and get it over with?"
"I think, Mrs. Snape, you need to settle you arse down."
"Sex." Dumbledore said with a cheery grin on his face. "Severus, try it. Say it. Say it loud. Say it proud! SEX!"
"Common, Mr. Snape. Just say it."
There was a slight mumble from Snape.
"A little bit louder now?"
"Sex," he still said in a whisper.
"A little bit louder now!"
"Sex."
"A little bit louder now!"
"SEX!" He screamed with a vicious look on his face.
Hermione giggled, "A little bit softer now..."
Of course, Severus didn't understand the big to do about her saying a little bit softer now.
"Muggle song, Severus," Dumbledore added.
"I think that there are more important things at the moment than muggle songs at the moment."
"Right you are. Well, I think the easy way to solve this problem is for you to experiment with what you like best. Under precautions though. And then in June, try to procreate."
Hermione looked at Severus. Severus, of course, glared back with full intensity.
They were going to have sex.