Part Twelve
-All the shit I seem to take
All alone I seem to break
I have lived the best I can
Does this make me not a man?
-"Alone I Break", KoRn-
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Cid slammed through to door of his Gummi garage, the flimsy plank of wood nearly snapping off of its creaky hinges. He couldn't take it; Aerith was hysterical, panicking at the thought of Sephiroth's return.
She couldn't restrain herself. She saw the look on the man's face, that smile… the only time she knew he smiled was when…
A choked sob burst from the flower girl's throat, causing her blonde companion to whirl around, glaring at her. Cid blamed the sob on himself - he had been rather forceful earlier in his attempt to calm the girl down after he had taken the Venus Gospel into his hands, ready to kill 'that fuckin' silver-haired motherfuckin' pretty-boy piece 'a shit son-of-a-bitch bastard'.
While Aerith had no qualms about the proclamation, she was more upset over the fact that the man had -more than once - come a little too close to accidentally slicing her with the lance's razor-sharp edge. Cid had misunderstood the worry as madness and grabbed the girl by the arms, shaking her violently. How that had managed to calm her down - especially while shouting at her to do so - Cid didn't know.
"Hey, knock that shit off!" Aerith shook again, hands clasped in front of her.
"I… I'm sorry, Cid," she stuttered, taking in a shaky breath. Silently, she cursed herself for always leaving the Princess Guard at home when venturing out, something she shouldn't have done in the first place, considering the Heartless littering the streets. "I… we…"
Cid growled. "Stop that cryin' shit, this ain't the time, girl!" His blue eyes scanned through Traverse Town's First District carefully. "Alright, Where'd ya say that lousy fuck was?"
"He was… in front of the door. Third and First…" She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, sniffling quietly. Cid's eyebrows knit themselves together, forming hard creases on his forehead. His teeth clamped on the filter of his cigarette so hard that Aerith was surprised the thing wasn't leaking out the brown toxins it contained.
The pilot tugged on his goggles and dropped his hand to his forehead as he scanned the streets of First - a move he often did on the Highwind II numerous times to shield his eyes of the sun. Though, in Traverse Town, it was simply a force of habit.
"I don't see the fucker," Cid grunted. "C'mon."
Not-too-gently Cid grabbed the girl's slender wrists and pulled her roughly as he walked farther into the town to continue their search, stopping every so often to inquire about a 'cock-knocker with silver hair' to stunned town residents.
"I'm scared, Cid," Aerith spoke quietly, latching onto her companion's arm. The pilot absently twirled the Venus Gospel in his hand before he poised it straight in front of him, readying it for their old enemy.
"Now ain't the time, girl," he grunted, his free hand grabbing then lighting a cigarette. "So shut the fuck up an' help me look."
Aerith could do nothing but comply.
--------
/Nothing./
/--Hmph. This really sucks, Seph.--/
/I agree, but there is no other option./
/--…just don't fall, alright? Gods, you're a psycho.--/
/So I've heard./
Sephiroth stood on the roof of a tall building, eyes scouring the new area. The tips of his boots were jutting off the roof's overhang as he observed, causing Zack to flinch with every movement. His friend was nearly indestructible, or so it seemed, but still a fall from a four-story building would hurt.
Without warning, Sephiroth jumped, twisting himself around in the air before latching on to the overhang.
Zack shrieked against his will. /--DAMMIT SEPH, DON'T DO THAT!!--/
"Zackary, please! I know what I'm doing!"
The silver-haired one let go, dropping quietly onto a balcony beneath him. He repeated his earlier actions until his feet were on the ground once more. Straightening his clothing, he let out a sigh.
"Well, that proved fruitless."
He marched into the middle of the bustling street of First and scanned. Nothing. He growled audibly, and several citizens of town tentatively stared at him with wide eyes. Sephiroth, however, noticed none of that as he pushed his way through the crowd, growing increasingly more frustrated as time wore on.
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"There he is!!" Cid shouted as he pointed at Sephiroth's dark form, his back facing the pilot and the green-eyed girl.
"Please, Cid… be careful," Aerith whispered, following his as he stormed past Traverse residents.
"Fuck that," he said, closing the distance between himself and their old enemy. "That fuck better be careful of me."
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Sephiroth cocked his head to the side, taking a look down a darkened alley. No, he didn't think Cloud was one who would frequent the places, but still he figured it was worth a try. In fact, the silver-haired man was so tuned into his search that he didn't even hear the menacing footsteps pounding their way towards him.
/--Damn, Seph, watch your ba—!--/
Before Zack could finish his warning, the former General felt something slam the back of his neck with a loud crack, nearly fracturing vertebrae. Sephiroth fell hard to his knees, face contorted in a mix of surprise, pain, and fury.
/--I tried to warn you this time, I swear!!--/
Sephiroth didn't reply, white teeth gritted. The assault to his neck had left him with a throbbing, painful heat radiating down his back and up to the base of his skull. He snarled, right hand reaching for the Masamune, left bracing him upright. His head was down, silky hair spilt over his shoulders and onto the cobblestone street. A swift kick to his kidney made his other hand drop to prevent him from collapsing, quest for his sword forgotten.
"You fuckin' pussy sonovabitch!!" came a hoarse, angry voice, absolutely seething with hatred. It sounded vaguely familiar, though Sephiroth's memory was temporarily far too clouded with fury-slash-pain to recall its owner. "You should fuckin' be dead!" Another kick to his side.
Mako with a mix of Jenova cells were flaring up in Sephiroth's body, the feeling turning his entire being numb to dull the blows to his neck and kidney. Though he sorely wanted to, the man refused to look up at his assailant - he knew he would cut the attacker down if he did. And, even though the gruff one was quite hostile towards him, Sephiroth could not allow himself to kill an innocent human again.
"Say somethin', ya fuckin' little BITCH!"
Glowing aqua eyes clamped shut as a third kick from a heavy, booted foot swung into his side.
"What, fuckin' psycho General's a fuckin' pansy now? Get up!" came another taunt.
"…you know me," Sephiroth somewhat asked, voice surprisingly cool for the beating he was receiving. His fingers curled, force from the action almost enough to break bits and pieces from the cobblestone beneath them. "…though not an old friend, I imagine," he grunted as something jabbed his side.
"The fuck you think, fucker?! I ain't you, I don't just fuckin' go attack innocent fuckin' people! 'Course I know you!!"
Sephiroth's head whirled to his aggressor, catlike pupils slitted dangerously as his eyes narrowed, strong jaw set. All of a sudden it clicked. The man was many years older than the last time Sephiroth saw him, but there was no mistaking that countenance.
"Captain Highwind."
"Fuck you," Cid spat furiously. Mako-drenched eyes caught sight of another set of brown-booted feet behind the pilot, a brief flash of pink appearing behind the man's leg.
/--…Aeris…?--/ Zack asked himself, voice uncharacteristically soft.
"The Cetra…" Sephiroth bit his lip enough to draw blood, unconsciously lapping at it with a quick flick of his tongue. At least now he understood the source of the hostility…
/If Captain Highwind and the Cetra both are here… is Cloud…?/
"She has a name, you fuckin' murderer!!" Cid shouted, hand on the Venus Gospel clenched hard enough to snap its length.
Sephiroth's thoughts broke off and he shook his head in a disarming gesture. His hand went to reach for the Masamune again but was swiped away with a deft rap from the handle of Cid's lance.
"Keep your fuckin' hands away from that!" the pilot ordered, face so dark it was nearly purple.
"…excuse me," Sephiroth apologized, voice audibly fighting for calm. "I mean no harm, I assure you. You do not trust me, of course, I'm aware of that fact." The blonde pilot growled. "Perhaps if you took my weapon," Sephiroth supplied, staring deep into Cid's eyes.
The gruff, older man took the Venus Gospel in both hands, its tip at Sephiroth's throat. "I'd be pretty fuckin' stupid to trust you, you fuck. Take that fuckin' sword off," he ordered, glaring. "You try any shit at all, I'll shove this through your fuckin' THROAT."
Sephiroth knew he would do just that, and complied.
Feline eyes seemingly looked through Cid when he finished discarding the Masamune, and towards the trembling girl in back of him. "I'm sorry…"
/--…Aeris…,--/ Zack repeated, shocked. He had seen her in the Lifestream, but to see her… alive again…
"…Aeris." The flower girl whimpered upon hearing her former name.
"Don't fuckin' talk to her."
Sephiroth held up one gloved hand to show he wasn't going to attack and sat back on his feet, shaking his head. The position he was in made him look - and sort of feel - like a scolded child apologizing to his parents for stealing a cookie. It was ridiculous, and humiliating, but to remove any fear of him that she had of him, Sephiroth was aware it had to be done.
"…Aeris…," the silver-haired man started, carefully testing out the name. It was his first time calling her something other than 'girl', and it was… strange. "Aeris… please look at me. I apologize for what—"
"I said don't fuckin' TALK TO HER!!" the pilot cut him off, spitting a long-dead cigarette butt from his mouth at the silver-haired man.
"The girl can speak for herself!" Sephiroth shouted, pale cheeks tinting themselves red. He closed his eyes and counted backwards from ten to calm himself; the last thing he needed was for his anger to get the better of him. Sephiroth swallowed hard as the point of the blue and yellow lance touched his shifting Adam's apple, the smallest trickle of blood seeping through a small wound.
Behind Cid, Aerith shifted. "I-I can't stay anymore… I have…"
Without finishing her statement, the pink-clad Cetra shook her head and let out another soft cry, dashing away from them, back to the direction of her home.
"Get up." Sephiroth stared up at the older man through his lashes, clenching and unclenching his jaw. "Get. The. Fuck. UP!!" Cid repeated.
The silver-haired man nodded slowly, lifting himself from the ground. He flapped his wing absently, causing several molted blue-black feathers to fall from it in a fairly dramatic manner. Cid sidestepped over to the Masamune, eyes and weapon still trained on Sephiroth as he picked up the sword and clipped it onto his belt.
"You fuckin' come with me. We got us a lot of shit to talk about."
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Leon scowled as he reloaded the barrel of the gunblade. If he had to fight one more of those damned Defenders, he was going to shoot himself. They came in waves, using both brute force and magic. Three of them had ganged up on him not too long ago, their beastly shields snapping at the warrior. Leon had taken two of them out earlier, leaving him with just one more - one which just would not die. It was getting ridiculous.
The brunette wiped blood from his lip as he dodged a spinning attack, rolling on the ground to the massive monster's back. He shot a fire round as he lay in the street and then stood, both hands on the hilt of his weapon. Bringing his arms up high he brought the blade down, cutting through the scorched, thin armor at its back. The Defender growled at the invasion, spinning around.
Leon smiled inwardly at the creature's predictability. He held onto his weapon and angled it down, imbedding the blade deeper. He brought his legs up as the Heartless spun, staying at its back; Leon was glad Heartless were so dumb. It would confuse itself if he 'magically disappeared'.
When the thing stood where Leon once was, it stopped and looked around, giving the gunblade wielder the chance he needed. Placing both feet on its back, he pushed off, firing another shot before landing. Jumping again, the blade this time severed the monster's spinal cord at the base of its neck. Black blood poured from both wounds in its back as the Defender collapsed, its motor skills gone.
He retracted the blade then dropped it down, decapitating it. It disappeared with a puff of purple smoke, leaving the stench of rot behind, along with another crystal and an Elixir. Leon pocketed both items and left.
Now finished with his battle, the brunette walked aimlessly through Second District, replaying the events of his encounter with Cloud in his head. He was… confused.
Extremely so, and he knew, in more ways than one.
He didn't know why he let himself act the way he did, and under any normal circumstance, he knew he wouldn't have. The last time Cloud kissed him - which he clearly remembered, despite his intoxication - he hadn't reacted…
Leon ran his hand through his hair, finding it slightly damp from where his head had rested on the stone of the Secret Waterway, and why it had been there… Cloud. The source of all his confusion.
Leon sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He knew had liked what the blonde was doing, he obviously couldn't deny that. He also couldn't deny that he knew what the blonde was in the first place, and what he was doing and that it felt really… good. Something, though, something felt wrong to him. Not a bad wrong, per se…
The man grunted, kicking a pebble out of his way. Was it guilt? It felt like it. But for what? For not finishing what he started?
Leon raised an eyebrow at his musings. So that meant he wanted to…? He did feel a certain longing, but was it for Cloud, or…?
Black gloved thumbs hooked themselves on the many belts around his waist. He couldn't help but ask himself why. Why he had let the blonde kiss him in the first place, why he had kissed him back, why he had let Cloud…
He let out an involuntary shudder at the thought. Leon could still feel the small body under his hands, his mouth on the other mouth, the breathing, Cloud's tongue, hands, taste, smell, feel…
"Stop it," he told himself, shaking his head.
A pang of guilt his him hard, causing him to wince. Guilty for what?
No… clearly someone was making him feel guilty, and it wasn't Cloud…
Again he shook his head, no, those days are over and done with, how could he betray what he never even had? But now, the only person he could focus his thoughts on was…
Leon's head snapped towards the sound of hurried footsteps approaching him, pulling the gunblade from its flimsy strap on a belt, ready to strike at ready.
"Leon!!"
"Oh, it's you."
The brunette put his weapon away as a form draped head-to-toe in pink collided with him. Instinctively he stiffened up as the girl's thin arms wrapped around his waist, Aerith burying her head in his chest. "…what's wrong?" he asked, his face hardening at the unexpected embrace.
For the time, Aerith continued to cry. Oh, she hated Sephiroth… she hated him. He took everything away from her, and she thought - hoped - he was truly gone, but now…
"Leon… it's horrible, Leon…" The man only stood there as tears drenched his shirt.
"What happened?" His voice was its normal tone, cold and bored. He didn't want to be rude to her, but he had enough problems of his own to think about, and silently hoped that Aerith's weren't too involved.
But as Aerith told him what had happened, Leon heaved a sigh.
So much for un-involvement.
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"Sit down," Cid barked, throwing the Masamune onto the floor.
The leather-clad one sighed, taking a seat on a hard wooden chair set against a dingy white wall. Highwind had led him to what looked like a garage, the stench of oil and metal and cigarette smoke hung in the air heavy enough to choke on. Without saying a word, Sephiroth folded his hands in his lap, waiting for Cid's next question even as the Venus Gospel was once again aimed at his neck.
"The fuck are you smilin' at?!"
"Pardon?" Cid's eyes narrowed. The smile he was unaware of fell from Sephiroth's face as he took on a stoic composure. He thought he saw the older man's blue eyes flicker slightly with recognition, but whatever it was died out quicker than it came.
"Why the fuck are you back here you fuckin' prick?!" The pilot's words were still as furious as before, but sounded even more menacing now, the deep barks echoing from the front office of Cid's garage.
Sephiroth stared up at the pilot coolly for a moment before answering. "I've only come for Cloud, Highwind, nothing more." He absently gestured around the area with a hand from his lap and said, "this is rather unnecessary; I was honest when I said I mean you no harm."
"Spike don't wanna fuckin' see you," the blonde grunted, lighting another cigarette. "And bullshit, don't mean no harm my ass, fuckin' psycho."
"Highwind, I assure you I am completely sane." He thought he heard Zack snicker jokingly but he had to brush it off - it wasn't time to get angry at the voice in his head. He had bigger things to worry about… like assuring the pilot of his sound mind.
Cid scowled. "I don't fuckin' believe you."
Sephiroth tilted his head, hair slipping elegantly from his shoulder. "I don't suppose I'm able to prove that fact." He paused. "Unless, of course, you prefer Cloud vouch for me. He is here, is he not?"
"I ain't tellin' you nothin'," Cid snarled, one hand readjusting his flight goggles, that same one moving to wipe away beads of perspiration from his brow. He absently realized that the room was rather hot, but Cid definitely wasn't about to move from his spot to open a window.
"Why then," Sephiroth started, "did you bring me here if you were unwilling to answer my questions?"
Cid blinked.
"Because, fucker, you gotta answer mine!"
"So ask them." The younger man pursed his lips and stated, "I have already told you my true purpose for being here." Cid opened his mouth to speak, but Sephiroth cut him off.
"Hades resurrected me, before you start. He mentioned Cloud, stating he had an obligation to fulfill but was distracted. I was sent to a place called Hollow Bastion, traveled quite a ways, and this is simply the end of my search." He raised a delicate eyebrow. "Rather, near the end of it. The final task is finding Cloud."
"I fuckin' told you, Spikey don't wanna fuckin' see you," Cid growled. He pulled a new cigarette from his pack, lighting it from his old one before tossing the butt to the stained concrete floor and stamping it out.
"How little you know," Sephiroth sighed quietly, lowering his eyes. Suddenly a corner of the room seemed very interesting to him…
Cid made a face as he looked where the ex-General was, finding nothing, and looked back warily at Sephiroth. "You think I'm fuckin' stupid?"
Sephiroth shook his head. "No. Simply ignorant."
"So you are callin' me stupid!!" Cid snarled.
"Stupidity and ignorance are completely different concepts, Highwind. Ignorance meaning you lack the necessary facts." Aqua eyes looked into angry blue once more. Sephiroth shook his head slowly, a silver eyebrow arched delicately. "He never told you, did he? Cloud, I mean."
For once, Cid seemed interested - even if it was just slightly. "…tell me what?"
Sephiroth let another sigh slip from his lips, sad and tired. "No… of course he didn't. He knew what you, as well as the rest of his companions, would sorely judge him if he had. Except, perhaps, for Valentine…"
"Don't fuckin' talk about Vin." Sephiroth ignored him.
"Honestly, I don't blame Cloud. Had I been in his position…"
"Cut the fuckin' shit and spill it!"
The former General gave the pilot a small smile, causing Cid's angered expression to switch over to confusion for bare seconds before reverting to anger again.
"Cloud Strife and I… were… lovers. Though the term makes me ill…" Sephiroth paused for a moment to clear his throat. "That was… before. During SOLDIER, when he was a regular."
"Bull. SHIT."
Sephiroth let his head drop back, staring at the yellowed plaster ceiling. "Trust me, Highwind, that is a fact."
"You're a fuckin' liar," Cid growled. "Spikey ain't gay, and if he was, he wouldn't've fucked you."
"Such insolent vulgarity." The silver head shook slowly. "And why do you say that? …homosexuality issues aside."
The pilot narrowed his eyes. "You really fuckin' think I'm that fuckin' gullible. Like the fuckin' General of fuckin' ShinRa would fuckin' fuck a fuckin' regular."
Sephiroth blinked at the long string of curses; it had been the most he ever heard out of someone's mouth in such a short time span.
"You didn't even talk to the fuckin' higher-ups when you didn't have to, like I'm gonna believe you'd fuck a regular!"
"It wasn't just sex, Highwind, though what I do in my own bed quarters is my business and mine alone."
Cid growled deep in his throat, the room nearly rumbling. "Nothin' but a liar."
"What would I have to gain by lying?"
"What wouldn't you?"
The ex-General closed his eyes tightly, rubbing at his temples with his thumb and forefinger. No matter where he went he had to deal with situations such as this, and he was tired of it. He couldn't even remember the last time he truly slept or even eaten since his resurrection, so naturally he was quite irritable, and that incessant prodding from the pilot was wearing thin.
"If I had intentions of harming Strife," Sephiroth started, voice an agitated growl, "do you honestly believe I would still be here with you? I'd've disposed of you the moment you approached me."
Finally, Sephiroth's words seemed to sink in. The older man tugged at his goggles and narrowed his eyes, studying the other's face for any signs of sincerity. After a few blessed moments of silence, the blonde spoke again, his tone still harsh but not quite as loud.
"…so you're tellin' me that not only did you fuck Cloud, you fucked 'im when he was a fuckin' kid?" Cid snorted derisively. "Not only are you a fuckin' crazy but a fuckin' molester pedophile too. A real fuckin' winner."
Zack's presence stiffened upon hearing the last of the pilot's words, knowing the most likely reaction they would provoke. /--Oh shit. Don't kill him, Seph…--/
The silver-haired man hadn't heard his friends message, absolutely livid from what he had just heard. /How DARE he?! Not only does he insult my sanity, but my morality as well!/
"Listen to me, Highwind. Strife loved me. Do NOT accuse me of such a foul deed. I do admit he was young, and perhaps I was not thinking clearly that first time, but I love—"
Abruptly Sephiroth stopped, clenching his teeth. He didn't need to tell the man his feelings; he didn't have to justify his actions, either. It was none of Cid's business what he did.
"I've had enough of this," he muttered, the rage ever-present in his system. Unfortunately for Sephiroth, Cid had heard what he said, incredulous as it was to him.
"Cold-hearted bastards like you don't fuckin' love. Ain't nothin' but a fuckin' LIAR. Ya know what? I hope Spike fuckin' laughs in your fuckin' face," the pilot chided with a snort. "Nothin' but a fuckin' delusional crazy!"
Sephiroth bristled. "This conversation is quite finished."
Cid let out a deep growl.
"Like hell it is."
/--…I wish I was dead again…--/
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Traverse Town was relatively quiet for that time of day, even Heartless seemed to have avoided their usual hiding places. Not that Cloud would have noticed anyway; his mind was still stuck on that brown-haired warrior clad in leather…
[What the fuck did I do…?]
Cloud brought his knees closer to his chest and heaved a sigh, his clawed hand raking through the tall spikes at the top of his head. His entire being stung with guilt now, constantly reminding him how he had betrayed Sephiroth in those moments with Leon, cursing his conscience for letting his body act before his brain kicked in.
"Stupid…"
[Why do you hate yourself for this? It isn't as if Sephiroth is here with you. He probably doesn't want you anymore anyway,] an inner voice teased, [if he did, why hasn't he found you yet, hmm?]
"Shut up," the blonde groaned, a lock of hair clutched in his fist. "The last thing I need is a devil on my shoulder…"
[You know he isn't coming back to you, and you're too weak to find him yourself. You may as well just stay there with Leon…] The voice trailed off before chuckling cruelly.
[Oh, that's right; he doesn't want you either.]
Cloud shook his head, bright blue eyes closing tight. The voice, who - or what - ever it was, was right. He was weak, drained from all the time he had played the hero, and instead Cloud had taken to waiting for his 'knight in shining armor'.
He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand in attempts to sooth the dull throb making its way there.
After a short time of silence from that voice - whom Cloud had deduced was the bad side of his conscience - the blonde dropped the hand from his face, letting his eyes wander towards the abandoned Buster Sword at his side.
[Why did I do this, anyway?] he sighed, resting his cheek on his knee as the clawed hand raked over the athletic tape decorating it. [Why do I bother to do any of this?]
Cloud's head shot up as a chill zipped down his spine, eyes shooting from side to side as his hand grabbed the hilt of his massive sword. Seeing nothing that could be considered a threat, he lowered his guard. The streets were still nearly empty, and illuminated only by several flickering lampposts which cast deceptive shadows resembling those of Heartless behind them.
"I gotta get out of here," he announced suddenly. Cloud looked around once more, making a face. "Somewhere with people."
Cloud cringed.
[People who aren't Leon…which means Cid's also out… so really, that only leaves Aerith and Yuffie…]
The blonde got up with a groan, cracking his sore back as he did so. Absently he picked up his sword, making his way towards the ninja's home.
Cloud's walk was surprisingly uneventful as well as short. He felt as if there was something off about Traverse Town, but was unable to put his finger on it. The place just seemed so empty lately…
Instead of worrying about it, Cloud chose to continue on walking, head down, eyes fixed on the ground in front of him. Though, he should have been looking up as he neared Yuffie's house - the girl almost slammed the door right into his face.
"Gods, Spikey!" the girl shrieked, clutching her chest dramatically. "Don't stand behind my door like that!!"
"I was just coming to see you," Cloud murmured with a shrug. He shifted uncomfortably as the girl stared blankly at him before standing on tip-toe, thoroughly examining the empty space behind him.
"Sooo… where's Leon at, huh?"
The blonde cringed inwardly, a slight burn creeping to his cheeks. "Uh, he… said he had to go to Cid's for a while," he responded, scratching the back of his head. Satisfied with this, the ninja hopped excitedly, a bright smile on her face.
"So ya came to hang out with your old pal Yuffie? Aww, that's so sweet, Spike." She backed up, inviting him inside with a lavish gesture. "It's just you and me, though, Aerith went out to buy some things a while ago." She put a finger to her chin, drawing her eyebrows together. "Actually a long while ago. Huh."
"You two barely leave this place, but she's still out for supplies whenever I come by," the blonde noted quietly, accepting his usual place on the couch after he rested his sword against the wall. "Why is that?"
Yuffie grumbled at the man's prying, flopping onto the couch next to her old teammate. "We need stuff because we help when the Heartless attack the townspeople." She kicked one leg out in what could be considered a stretch and shrugged. "Happens a lot, and we need all the potions we can get."
"I thought she was avoiding me or something…," Cloud trailed off, making a circling motion with his hand. "She never seems to want to talk to me," he clarified after catching the look on Yuffie's face.
"Don't be a dummy. Why would she do that?"
Cloud looked over at the teenager next to him, an eyebrow raised. "Why not?"
"…you sure can be stupid, Cloud," the girl giggled, poking him in the side.
"Don't do that," he grunted, smacking her hand away. "What are you talking about?"
"So how is it living with Leon?" she asked, seemingly oblivious to Cloud's earlier question. Once more Cloud blushed, turning his head to the side.
[…how the hell am I supposed to ask her if I can stay here for a while…? How could I possibly explain that?!]
"Uh… yeah… about that…"
[Fuck it, I can stay in the Hotel. If there's no rooms, I'll sleep in the alley.]
"…it's going fine."
"I think Leon really likes ya. You get along with him pretty good," she added cheerfully, slapping him on the shoulder.
[…not anymore…] "…oh?"
Yuffie nodded. "Yep! I don't think he's even talked to me as much as he's talked to you." She stopped, blowing a raspberry at him. "Probably because you're a guy. Hmph."
Cloud blinked, fixing his gaze on the wall across from him. "…what do you mean by that…?"
"Y'know, guys always get along better with other guys and stuff," she paused to look at him and shook her head. "What do you guys talk about, anyway? You're both so quiet. What is it, girls? You talk about girls, don't you… I knew it. Dirty pervs."
He cast her a quizzical sidelong glance, one eyebrow raised. "You really think that's all guys talk about?"
Yuffie shrugged. "I dunno, maybe. It just seems like something you'd do."
[If only she knew…] "…right, so in your eyes, I'm the typical male stereotype?"
"Sure, you are a hero, aren't you?"
Cloud rolled his eyes and was about to respond when the Cetra slammed through the door, swinging it back hard enough to crack the plaster behind the knob. She grabbed Yuffie's arm forcefully, pulling her off of her perch and dragging her into her bedroom.
"Urk!" the ninja exclaimed incomprehensibly, dragging like a ragdoll behind Aerith. "What's wrong?!"
"Aerith, what are you—?" Cloud started, confusion apparent on his face.
"Stay there, girl talk," she interrupted, storming down the small hallway before pulling the door to her room tightly shut.
Cloud watched the display uneasily before he moved forward and stood close to Aerith's bedroom door. The two girls were whispering harshly, but he could easily hear the entire conversation due to the Mako enhancements. Generally, eavesdropping was something he never approved of, but to see Aerith look so frantic had worried him…
"Yuffie!! What are we supposed to do?!"
"I dunno! Man, I don't believe this…" A pause. "Are you sure?"
"Of course! You'd have to be blind not to notice that… that…" Aerith's voice was hushed, and the blonde man assumed she was crying.
"Aerith… c'mon, now…" Cloud heard a faint rustling sound. "It'll be okay…"
"No, Yuffie, it won't…," the flower girl sniffed loudly. "We…," her voice got quieter, and the blonde carefully stepped closer to the door to listen. "We can't tell Cloud."
"But… doesn't he have a right to know?"
[Know what?]
"No, no he doesn't… he can't know, Yuffie."
"You think so?"
"Yes! How would you feel if your…" Aerith paused, lowering her voice. "Your… you know… was out to get you?"
There was another halt in the conversation, most likely from Yuffie's end. "I thought he already knew that?"
"But now it's definite, and I don't want Cloud…," she stopped again. "I just don't want Cloud to get hurt."
Cloud clenched his fists, but continued listening. [Aerith, you… LIAR… you KNOW he wouldn't… I told you…]
"Cloud can take care of himself, though… this happened before…"
"That's true… but… no. We can't. We'd… put everyone in danger."
"Sora can help him, if worse comes to worse…"
"We can't let him know!" Aerith's voice rose angrily. "Cloud can NOT know he's here!"
[That's… enough…]
Cloud's clawed hand moved quickly, jerking the door open with a snap. Yuffie abruptly pulled herself to kneel on the bed with the Conformer drawn, ready to strike at the intruder. The look on her face, though, was one of complete surprise and fear, and Aerith was frightened as well.
The blonde fighter's face was bright red, jaw clamped shut, glowing blue eyes blazing with anger. His nostrils flared as he tried to control his angered breathing. He lifted up a hand to stop Aerith as she began to stutter, eyes wide.
"Aerith, don't. I do NOT need you to try and protect me," he spat bitterly. "You knew. You fucking knew and you still act like the innocent one. You KNOW what I've been through with this…"
Cloud was unaware he was advancing on the flower girl until he was inches from her face, and continued. "How can you… did you even think that I wanted to see him again?! Wait. Yes you did. You ALWAYS knew about it. Fuck, I even told you when I first got here!! What are you trying to do, Aerith?"
Yuffie blinked questioningly, but stayed silent.
"I'm… I'm not… trying…"
"STOP. I am not finished."
"Cloud, if you would stop yell—"
"What did I just say?! Don't. Talk. I do not want to hear your voice right now. Just listen to me for once." He lifted a hand and jabbed a finger at Aerith's breastbone. "I do not want you to protect me. I know you're scared of him. I know you are. But I've told you that wasn't him who did it. Jenova is dead, Aerith. She died when I killed him." He took a deep breath.
"I know you're scared, but I'm not, so would you just please stop trying to protect me…"
She hung her head and clasped her dainty hands behind her back, frowning. "I don't want to lose you, Cloud."
The blonde raked his clawed hand through his spiked hair roughly. "You won't lose me. Seph wouldn't hurt me."
"But he HAS… and…," she took a deep, shaky breath. "…I didn't mean it that way…" Crystalline tears slid from her lashes as she closed her eyes.
"Then what do you mean?"
The flower shook her head, dropping her hands to her sides in defeat. She turned to face Cloud, lower lip trembling, voice shaky and filled with tears. "You know what I'm talking about…"
The blonde shook his head slowly. "No, I don't, Aerith."
"How…" Aerith shook her head again, sighing heavily. Her eyes narrowed slightly, eyebrows drawn together, and gave Cloud a look of not-quite subtle disbelief. "How is that possible?"
"She's in LOVE with you, you… you clod!!" Yuffie blurted out, coming out of her daze, pointing a finger at the blonde.
Cloud looked towards the ninja then back to Aerith, her cheeks stained with tears. "That's why you didn't want to tell me about Seph…?" the blonde asked, placidly.
Aerith nodded and whispered, "yes, Cloud." She gestured futilely before clasping her hands in front of her.
"And why you…"
The blonde man turned away from the two girls then and grunted. He slipped onto Aerith's plush couch unceremoniously, his hands on his face. The Cetra bit her bottom lip, casting a pleading look at Yuffie, to which the younger girl shrugged, making a face. It didn't look like Cloud wanted to talk to them for a while, but the girls refused to leave the room, even though just the simple act of talking to each other seemed like it would anger Cloud even more.
A few minutes passed and the warrior hadn't moved, with the exception of the rise and fall of his chest. Suddenly, the ninja girl poked Aerith in the side, startling her.
'What?', the pink-clad girl mouthed.
'Go talk to him!'
'No, he's angry…'
'At least see if he's alive of not!' Aerith cocked her head at Yuffie and pointed to the man's chest. 'Yeah, yeah.'
"Aerith?" Cloud broke in weakly. The girl stepped forward slowly.
"Yes, Cloud…?"
"Is it true…?"
The flower girl blinked a bit at Cloud's question. After a moment of silence, she nodded, even though he wouldn't see the gesticulation. "Yes, Cloud, I love you. I am in love with you."
"No… not that… that wasn't what I meant…," he murmured, biting a knuckle. The blonde stood up, his palm resting on his forehead. He paced back and forth as he spoke, hip guard clanking slightly against numerous belt buckles.
"Is it true that he's back? That he's… here?" Cloud didn't pause to allow the girl to answer. "Is it true that you're so selfish… why don't you want me to be happy, Aerith…?"
The flower girl's expression grew sadder at the same time it turned cold. Her normally sparkling emerald eyes darkened angrily as his spiteful words finally sunk in. "…selfish?!"
Yuffie's big, brown eyes widened considerably as she shrank down, wishing to disappear. "Oh boy…" Her words went unheeded.
"Yeah, selfish." He shook his head and threw his arms out. "Wanted to protect me, she said," he muttered skyward. "You didn't want to tellme about my Sephirothbecause of your want and your… needs."
He didn't notice the ninja girl's surprise at his words, startled by Cloud's revelation. She hadn't known anything at all about how the blonde felt for Sephiroth, but now she knew why Aerith was adamant about not telling the blonde about who she had seen…
"I could've seen him again, Aerith. Now… now he's probably long gone because of you."
Aerith stomped over to where Cloud was standing. Her face burned bright red, furious with his accusation. "You bastard!" she spat. Without warning, she lifted her arm and slapped the man across the face with all the might her petite frame could muster. The two others were in shock.
"You should talk about selfish! How dareyou accuse me of acting like that! I didn't want to tell you because I know you, Cloud! You'd kill yourself trying to find him!"
"That was my point in the first place!! That's what I signed the CONTRACT FOR!!" Cloud yelled back at her. "I'd rather be dead right now than suffering like I am!!"
"Then, maybe you should have diedbecause you're too stupid to realize that murderer does not deserve you, when I do!" Aerith shouted, immediately clapping her hands over her mouth. Cloud gaped at her, slack-jawed, amazed at the girl's outburst.
Yuffie's head was swimming and she nearly fainted, only regaining control as Aerith choked out a sob, her entire body quaking. The ninja slid off the bed and wrapped a slender arm around the other girl's shoulders, glaring at Cloud. "Aerith…"
Cloud shook his head. "No. Don't… start this shit with me, Aerith. He was there way before you came into the picture. Way before… and…"
The blonde man then turned slowly and stormed out of the small house, slamming the door so hard it nearly shattered, leaving the flower girl and Yuffie by themselves with the sounds of sobbing in the air.
Outside, Cloud looked around hastily for any sign of his lost Light. His face stung from Aerith's assault, guilt and betrayal both surging in his heart. A croaked sob passed his lips as he fell to his knees.
[When did I get like this?! How come now it's so fucking HARD?!]
He yelled out Sephiroth's name, pounding his fists on the pavement. Cloud was too tired to go on, mentally strained from memories of the past six years rushing through his head like waves. Thoughts of Zack and Sephiroth, how he had seen them both die right before his eyes… the latter, his love, his Sephiroth, by Cloud's own hands.
[…Seph…]
Tears streamed down red cheeks as he sobbed, head down low, until hard heels from a pair of boots crunching on the ground sounded, someone approaching him from behind. A familiar voice rang out, shaming the blonde for being found in that condition.
"…Cloud?"
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A/N: Chapter slightly revised 7/11/04. ADDED 200 WORDS OMFG WOW.
Whoo, drama. I don't exactly like writing drama. But I like writing Cid. Yes I do. He's so moody! And, sadly, he and I both have basically the same potty mouth -.-;