Seyruun High Jinx –NEXT!

Chapter 16

Fixing a Hole Where the Pain Gets In…

"He's feeling very bad right now. I just think you should know."-- Zel

The break up:

The next evening, the Slayers were back at work, playing music, doing what they liked most to do.

It was the new Lina and Xelloss duet. Joey didn't seem the least bit nervous as he took up his spot on Xelloss' vacated throne. He was about the same size as the older young man, so he had no adjustments to make to the kit. He picked up the drum sticks and gave them a confident twirl as Lina announced the new band line-up.

Cool.

He set the beat with Gourry and the song began. Lina and Xelloss shared a secret smile and let loose with the tense introductory vocals. Gourry turned away, wishing to focus on his playing, and not on his Lina and his competition.

Gourry became increasingly agitated as the dancing progressed; his passions steadily building up to an explosive level. The dancing couldn't even have been described as 'suggestive,' since it didn't imply anything. It screamed sexual excitement. Xelloss' hands caressed Lina's body at every opportunity provided; lifting her high overhead, swinging her low, bending her over backwards so that her hair swept the floor. She shouted and grinned with the exhilaration of it.

No, Gourry couldn't believe she was unaware of Xelloss' intimacy, and yet she never brushed away his hands or frowned when a finger brushed her skin.

And they had to have practiced the dancing. Lots.

The dancing checked when the instrumental's broke and the pair returned to singing their duet. Then, Gourry noticed, they sang staring deeply into one another's eyes and undulating to the rhythm sensuously. The crowd went nuts.

His stomach clenched as he thought about what one of their practices must have been like. His little brother Joey drumming with them to perfect their timing, while Gourry had been at work with his dad. Oh, yeah...he remembered the time he had just come home in time to find Xelloss in the kitchen with Joey and Lina sharing a drink. The two of them had worked up quite a sweat. Xelloss had excused himself and left to clean up after a brief hello. Joey. Joey had been a witness to their dancing. Gourry hoped that had been all. That had been enough! When he'd asked Lina what was up, she'd answered glibly, 'That's a secret!' And laughed! She might as well have stabbed him through the heart with knife she was using to peel an apple. He gritted his teeth and plucked out the bass line with renewed fervor.

The piece was nearly done. Thank the gods. The final words were sung in husky voices and the pair drew together for one last dance. Gourry felt the hair on his arms rise with his ire. How many times had Xelloss kissed Lina in the past? She'd seen him naked. They never said exactly what had gone on that time Lina was showering at the beach house and Xelloss had intruded. Or had he? Maybe it had been Gourry who'd been intruding…

Gourry set his jaw and tried to concentrate on his playing. Lina had told him Xelloss wasn't special, hadn't she? It was just a spirited performance they were putting on, right? That guy was a good dancer and Lina liked to dance. Xelloss was dating other girls now. Maybe… Well, remember, it's just an act.

Gourry had curbed his jealously, pounded it to the floor, and stomped it into the dirty grit.

Then came the finale.

Xelloss lifted Lina as if she were a doll then held her overhead a moment. Slowly, he let her slender body slide down his hard chest until they were nose-to-nose and her legs were wrapped around his waist. The crowd went wild.

Zelgadiss moved like lightening the moment his fine-tuned hearing caught the jangle of misplayed strings and the twang of an overwrought one followed by the crazy 'boing' of a broken string.

He had carefully set aside his Fender before diving for Gourry's bass which was about to fall from the big guy's shoulder. The bass he quickly deposited safely and then jumped between Gourry and the unfortunate pair.

"Don't!" Zel hissed at Gourry, pushing his shoulder away with all his strength. "Get outta here."

In a leap and a bound, the lithe young man with the wiry lavender hair grabbed the microphone and shouted amid excited screams and frenzied hollers from the wild crowd, "Break! Take fifteen and we'll be back for the second half!"

Zelgadiss practically dragged Gourry backstage, followed immediately by Filia and Amelia. Val snagged onto Xelloss and murmured, "Ya shouldn'ta done that. It was hot, but ya took it too far. Gourry's frothin' at the mouth and we gottanother set ta go."

Lina overheard that and her face reddened, but not with shame. She was angry.

Gourry whirled around the moment Xelloss stepped backstage, and then grabbed the smaller guy by his collar, yanking him to his toes. "Don't you ever try a dirty trick like that on Lina again or I will..."

His threat was never uttered because at that moment, Lina stormed backstage. She blew up. How dare Gourry screw up on stage! "So...you had trouble with that? We're a band. We entertain the audience. That gottem all stirred up and that's what it was for! What did ya think was goin' on, huh?"

Gourry was attempting to leash in his emotions, but was losing the battle. "He had his hands all over ya, Lina."

"Yeah? Well, he woulda dropped me if he hadn't. And so what? It's my body, not yours, and if I wanna have wild, sweaty sex with him...or you...or him," she yelled pointing at Xelloss, Gourry, and lastly in the direction of both Val and Zel, "I damned well will! Got that! No one owns me! I'm not anybody's property! I don't answer to anyone, got that? I do what I please and if you don't like that...if you can't trust my judgment then...too bad! Live with it! Puke your guts up if you haveta, but never...never blow it on stage!" Lina flung a towel over her neck and stomped off. She grabbed Amelia's arm and said calmly, "I'm dying for a can of soda. Help me find somethin', will ya?"

"Yes, Miss Lina," Amelia gasped and hurried to keep up with the girl she considered to be her best friend.

Xelloss raised a finger to call after her and stopped when he felt the sizzle of a scorching glare shot from Zelgadiss. He had wanted to follow up on that 'wild, sweaty sex' lead, but thought better of it in retrospect.

"Miss Lina, you didn't really mean that!" Amelia gasped.

"I sure as hell did!" Lina snapped back. "I call all the shots around here! And absolutely no one will ever possess me!"

Amelia agreed emphatically, "Of course not! Me neither! But that wasn't the part I meant." She dropped her voice and covered her mouth with her hand. "You aren't going to...you know... sleep with one of your friends?"

Whether or not Lina heard Amelia, she didn't answer. She was lost in the crowd around the concession booth demanding a cold soda NOW.

Now, Gourry felt very bad about the incident. He was not a dumb guy. He had intellectual depth but sometimes this was confused with stupidity because he was not quick witted. He was slow and contemplative. Ask him a question and he might take a moment to consider his answer before opening his mouth. His friends had learned to respect the young man's thoughtful responses. Gourry might not say much, but what he did say was worth listening to and showed careful consideration. That's why he felt so bad about what had happened; he had let his emotions take over. It wasn't that he didn't like Xelloss either. He admired the glib and articulate guy who was not afraid to go for what he wanted despite the lack of encouragement. At least Gourry didn't think Lina was interested in a romantic relationship with Xelloss. But…maybe she was and couldn't admit it to herself?

That thought didn't bring Gourry any cheer either. Right now nothing did. He had become seriously jealous and let it show, but had tried to disguise it as concern for Lina. Or at least he was afraid that that was what she thought. He'd really messed up.

Val, of all people, concerned himself with young Joey. He steered Joey away from the excitement and flooded his brain with a combination of praise, curiosity (doesn't it hurt like hell to have that lip stud?), and sudden changes of topic.

"Awesome, dude! Yer must have practiced lots, huh? Notice how much better it sounds on this new kit of his? Bigger bass drum, for one, and the entire cymbal collection is different. Yeah, that one's brighter sounding…" Val was saying.

So the Xelloss-Lina-Gourry interaction mostly by-passed Joey. Which was a good thing, considering that Gourry was his much admired big brother and Lina his brother's girlfriend (well, that's what he thought!) and Xelloss his idol.

Soon, Zelgadiss and Gourry joined them. Gourry seemed numb, but with a prompt from Zel, congratulated his little brother for doing a good job.

"Yeah, that was so cool! I can see why you wanna do this!" Joey cried out to Gourry. "I can't wait for the next set to do it again! Think Xelloss will let me do more?"

Gourry shook his head and walked away. Lina. Yes, she would insist that they do it again tonight. Better go replace that string he broke…

Zel and Val exchanged meaningful glances. In a millisecond, Val agreed to watch Gourry and Xelloss, who was now chatting happily away with Joey, while Zel accepted his duty to go 'check on Lina'. Filia and Sylphiel, unsure which way to turn, had joined Amelia.

Zel located Lina using his heat sensors. She was explosive. She did seem to cool a few degrees under his frosty glare, however. "You tell them to assemble."

"Assemble. As in the troops?" he asked acidly.

"Yes. I'm gonna lay down the rules for the band from here on out. They can take'em or leave. That's it."

"Fine, Lina, but don't forget that Gourry's younger brother is here, and he's clueless about what transpired."

"Then you take him for a five minute walk for air and water as soon as everyone is…"

"Assembled. I did hear you the first time." He raked over her face with another cool look, and then added, "He's feeling very bad right now. I just think you should know." Zel was torn. He loved Gourry as the great guy he was and Xelloss like a brother. He knew Gourry's heart and Xelloss' soul. He couldn't take sides against or for either one.

"Who? Which one?"

"Gourry, who else?" But then Zel left it at that. Both guys were his friends. He sighed and returned to backstage, checking his watch. He located everyone and as Lina entered the arena like a general, he withdrew, pulling Joey along beside him. "You need water or you'll pass out from dehydration. Come with me."

Lina stood in front of the remaining Slayers. She cleared her throat then began her tirade. It consisted mostly of 'my way or the highway' type phases. Her eyes met Amelia's, who smiled weakly and held up two fingers—two minutes until they go back on.

"Okay, listen. This band, you, my friends, mean everything to me. I don't want any of you to leave. I don't want the band to break up or change at all, but…I can't feel like I gotta tip toe around yer feelings all the time. I got feelings too, ya know that? I won't be a part of any of you hurting each other. We have experienced tragedy together. We share dark secrets. We cannot harbor hatred. We just cannot! It will tear us apart!

"So finish the gig tonight, like the pros we always have been, through thick and through thin…and then think some. We gotta weeks of work ahead of us then we do the CDs then the musical… We're gonna be workin' close. Think about it. Can you do it? Can you do it and not kill one another? Ya got all week to think about it. If ya can't…if ya wanna split, tell me. If I gotta find a replacement, then tell me-- soon. I-it would be hard and awful and I really, really don't wanna do that, but I will if it preserves the rest of the band. Now, that's all I'm gonna say 'cause Zel and Joey are comin' back and we gotta job to finish tonight. Okay? Can we do this?"

Gourry nodded, as did Xelloss and Val, Filia and Amelia and Sylphiel. They were quiet, but they agreed.

The second set seemed longer. Maybe that was because their spirits were a bit low. They still put on a solid show. And Xelloss was less smiley, Amelia less cheerful, and Lina a bit less exuberant, but that could have been because they were a little tired as well. Joey gave it his best shot and filled in for Xelloss just fine. Gourry decided he could be proud of his little brother for honoring his agreement and attempted to disregard Xelloss and Lina's dancing. Then the song was over and they moved on to the next song—as if nothing had happened.

But something had. A rift had opened up in the close-knit group. Would anything draw them together again? Or would it only widen further, causing the band to simply unravel and fall apart?

Consideration, decisions:

It took a few days for Lina's words to sink in: I call the shots. Stay or leave. The Slayers were on the cusp of stardom, but could they survive long enough to see that brilliant future? Well, Amelia would stick with Lina regardless. She called and told her so that very night.

"I'm sure everyone wants us to go on. Mr. Gourry and Mr. Xelloss just have to work things out…and can do it. I just know they can!"

Lina wasn't so sure.

Zelgadiss also made it clear the next day that he would remain the lead guitarist until Lina kicked him out.

"I never thought we'd do so well, as a band, but now…I do what I do—which is whatever you tell me to, pretty much-- for as long as you say to. All right? Anything else you want from me? A blood bond?" he asked with a smirk.

"Already got that, long time ago in the tree house. Remember?" she grinned.

He blushed slightly. "Of course, but that wasn't really…"

"Yeah, sure. After I pulled that huge sliver of wood out of your pinkie finger you rubbed the blood—all two drops of it—into my skinned knee and said…"

"I know what I said," he interrupted her. That was embarrassing stuff. "It was a big splinter, wasn't it?"

Her voice softened. Poor Zel, he was a softy…once. "Yeah, it really was big."

He raised his luminous eyes and looked into hers thankful for her sensitivity, for once. He still was a softy, deep inside. "Has anyone told you they wanted to quit?"

"No," she said shaking her head, "But I've only spoken to you and Amelia so far."

He placed a hand on her shoulder in one of his rare (but becoming less so all the time) caring gestures, "They'll all come around. You'll see."

"Yeah? I'm not so sure," Lina sighed and they parted.

Filia and Sylphiel assured her that they wanted only to sing, as long as the rest of the band was there to play the music.

"Lina, you know we're with you as long as the rest of the guys are too. I mean, there's no band without the guys, right? So, are they all on board yet?" Filia asked.

"Only Zel, so far, and Amelia, of course, but you knew that."

"Oh, Lina, they'll all stay with the band. I mean, they really don't have much else to do anyway. They're just…guys, you know? They don't know how to do emotional stuff," Sylphiel asserted.

Filia snorted, "What about Xelloss? He's all about emotions. He just sucks those evil ones out of me and grows stronger by the day, I know it! And Zel, Mr. I Feel Nothing. My Cephied…he's able to talk to his Lina just fine when it comes to certain emotional issues."

Lina shot her a warning look. Filia was sure Zel was in love with Lina still and never let Lina forget it. "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that. You know, Zel asked Amelia out for her very first date?"

"What!" This was news to both Filia and Sylphiel. Amelia had kept this wonderful news to herself…and told Lina? "On her birthday?"

"Yeah," Lina said smugly, "So I guess ole Zel does care about others, including the band that much. Like I said…"

"Oh my gods!" Sylphiel squealed with delight. "Now we can't give her a gift because she's gotten the only thing she's ever wanted!"

"Oh sure we can," Filia smiled slyly. "We can buy Miss Amelia some sexy lingerie."

"Oh, Filia!" Sylphiel wailed and laughed.

"I'm sorry I said anything," Lina muttered. And for Zel's sake, she truly was.

Val took Lina out to dinner one evening and had a heart-to-heart talk. Music was his life now; the Slayers, his family. He wouldn't be the one to tear up the family.

"I got everythin' I got, 'cause of you an' all," he began. "I won't give it up…and I won't let anyone else screw it up either." Val tossed back his coke and slammed his empty glass on the table.

"Val, thanks, but…everyone needs to make up their own minds about this. I don't want to run the show, if the show's not meant to go on. Get what I'm sayin'?"

"No co-er-zun. Yah, I got it. It juss pisses me off that someone might…" He stood up. "Wanna re-fill?"

"Yeah, thanks. Rootbeer."

When he returned, Lina continued, "Val, if someone wants out, then it's for the best. It's meant to be. I know, I feel like we're all family too, but ya know, sometimes too much family is, well, too much. Then ya gotta break out an' go yer own way." Lina munched on her pizza crust thoughtfully.

"So, does that mean someone already has…said their leavin'?" Val said in a strangled voice. That was a hard thing for him to accept, regardless of Lina's apparent cool acknowledgment of the possibility.

"Nope. Not yet. But," she looked up and met his eyes. "I haven't heard from either Gourry or Xelloss yet."

"Oh." Val scowled. "I could talk to 'em both. Not harsh, Lina, but get them ta see that there's ways ta make it all work."

Lina shook her head. "No. Damnit, Val. I meant what I said. Let them think it through. I want them to come to that realization all by themselves. Got that?"

"Yeah, okay. What you say, boss." He smirked at her from across the table.

"Funny."

"Think so? Well, not as funny as the way you look with that sauce on yer nose. Like one humongous bleeding zit!" he chuckled.

Then before she could react, he wiped it off with his thumb. "Ah, don't get all worked up 'bout it."

She was a bit irked at his nerve to touch her person like that, but then understood what he was saying with his next words. "Yer right, they'll all come through in the end."

"Damned straight!" she said, and then muttered. "I hope anyway…"

That left Xelloss and Gourry to talk with Lina.

Gourry dealt with his demons alone for several days. He knew his heart was with Lina and that he would stay with her forever. But could he, if she felt more for...someone else? Could he stand to see Lina practically everyday, knowing she liked someone else? And not just any someone, Xelloss. But, Lina had assured him, she wasn't interested in having a boyfriend. So what was Xelloss to her?

He was mad. He wanted to be loyal. He had joined the band from the start as a lark, but now it had become an important part of his life. Zelgadiss and Val he considered to be his closest friends. Leaving the band would mean abandoning them. That just wasn't in Gourry's code of honor. They were a team. They had fought side-by-side for their lives, for Lina. Xelloss, too. He even liked Xelloss, as a person. He was an odd guy, but funny. If it wasn't for Lina, they'd be better friends, probably. But Xelloss was crazy about Lina-- relentless, driven about it, in fact. Yes, Gourry was jealous, but would he let that drive him out of the band?

No. He decided that he would trust Lina. He would respect her feelings and live with them, regardless. He would also make his feelings toward her more apparent. Give her a clear-cut choice, while at the same time not antagonize Xelloss, purposely. If anyone was going to have to leave the band, it would have to be Xelloss. He was the weak link, Gourry supposed. With that in mind, he called on Lina to tell her that he would remain in the band, by her side on her conditions, for as long as she wanted. She had his word.

"Well, it took you long enough to tell me," she shot back.

He was standing outside her house on his way back from working at Kiki's place, which was nearly done. "I know and I'm…ah…sorry. I just had ta think about everythin'. I had ta know that I could be okay seein' you with…him…like that and not do somethin'…"

"Stupid? Is that the word you were about to say? Yah? And, so you think you can muster enough self-control in the future not to bust up yer strings or yer axe every time he and I do that song?"

"Ah…um...It's not just that song, Lina. But, yeah, I trust ya to do what's right and I'll just…"

"Be a professional bassist, the best there is, right?" She smiled up at him and his heart swelled.

"Sure, Lina. I'll do what it takes to make the band the best for ya. I'll always…be there…you know, if ya need me." He blinked and hoped she took that the right way and didn't clobber him.

"Good. Cause we're more than just a band, Gourry. We're a family. Tight, ya know? I can't deal with you guys fighting. So the new rules include professional behavior during practices, on the road and gigs. And most importantly…no romance. I don't want to risk the band like that ever again, got that?"

He nodded violently. "But…that don't mean I can't take ya…ta get some…cheesecake? Sometimes…ya know, when ya want to…"

Her eyes narrowed, "Like now? Or are you just baiting me here?"

"Wanna go now? Yeah, I got the truck an' all. I sure could use somethin' myself. Did I tell ya 'bout the flooring problem I got solved?"

Lina chuckled, "No, but you can over that cheesecake. Come on, let's get outta here."

Xelloss considered his position carefully. He had done nothing wrong, per se, but he was perfectly aware just how mad he'd made Gourry, and worse, that it had been intentional. He had meant to show everyone that he laid claim to Lina; that he had won her heart in some way. But he hadn't thought Gourry would react so violently or that it might compromise the band. If the band broke up, then he would be blamed, he was certain. Lina would never forgive him for that. He should quit, then, and let them find a replacement. Shit, he'd been training one for months now! Joey could fill in well enough. It wasn't as if he were a musician or anything!

What if his quitting somehow became the cause for the band's break up? Would Zelgadiss or Val quit also? No, he decided. They wouldn't leave Lina in the lurch like that. Only he would, huh?

ARGH! What should he do? What did he want to do? That was simple, at least. He wanted to please Lina. Well, then what would please Miss Lina? He thought about that long and hard.

Then he picked up the phone and called, "Luna? Yes, it's Xelloss. Is Lina in and available…I mean, to talk? Yeah, I'll hold. Thanks."

A few moments later Lina picked up. "Xelloss? What's up?"

"I…need to talk to you. About the band and all. Can I come over?"

She hesitated then answered, "Ah, not now. I don't think so, but we can talk on the phone, okay?"

No. It was not, but what choice did he have?

"I'd rather do this face to face. I have a hard time reading people over the phone," Xelloss sighed when she did not answer. "I'll do my best then. It's about the band and what you said and what I should do…"

Lina swallowed. This did not sound good. "Go on…"

"I-I'm not sure." He paused. He was having a difficult time. "If only I could see your face and know how you were reacting…"

But she didn't respond.

"I, ah…want to do what's best. Best for the band and for you. If you think everything would be smooth and happy and better, I'll q-quit. Joey's doing great. He'll work hard and…do in a pinch until you find someone who…who…you like better."

He had to stop. He could hardly get a sound out his throat had tightened so much. He was leaking tears and knew he was seconds from breaking down and just sobbing. Maybe this was why Lina didn't want him to come over? Yeah, better this way.

"Xelloss? Are you still there?" Lina's voice sounded a million miles away.

"Y-Yes! I was…Gods, Lina this isn't easy. I love playing in the band. I love everyone. I love you." Oops, he hadn't meant to say that. Oh, well, he couldn't take it back now, so he just plowed ahead. "But I'd leave it all to make peace. If that's what it takes! If that's what you think. I don't want to be the one to cause the band to break up."

"They all want to stay in the band," Lina said. "Even before your answer."

"T-that's good…great, Lina. I'm glad. Deep down, I want to stay." Then he decided to throw all his cards on the table. "Lately, I've been so happy, you know? Happy to be the real me. Not to hide my feelings or my personality anymore. But I can see that…I was being selfish. I was thinking about me and…that created a problem for you, and I don't want that—not at all. Lina, I can't change how I feel about you, but I can pretend. I can go back to what I was and disguise my feelings. I'd do that and stay in the band and not cause you any more trouble and everyone will be happy and the band will stick together and… and… Would that make you happy, Lina? I just…need to know. I don't know what else to do. Lina, tell me. Just tell me…what should I do?"

He could hear her sigh.

Man, he was so over-the-top sometimes, Lina thought to herself. "Oh, cripes, Xelloss. Stay in the band. Joey's not a bit the musician you are- not that you haven't done a good job teaching him and all but you've got years of experience over him. And I don't want…er, that is, expect you to hide your true self behind some smiley fruitcake mask. What I do want and will expect of you is what I will demand from everyone, and that's professionalism. We stick together; we're family; we treat one another with respect and thoughtfulness. And most importantly, while we're working, on the road or at practice…no romance crap, got that?"

Xelloss gasped audibly, "Y-you want me to stay and continue to play the drums?"

"And do this musical and be a part of our Slayers family, and be my friend. Yes, of course, you nutcase! I've put too much of myself into this to give up on it now, and without you…or Zel…or any of the others--even Sylphiel!—it wouldn't be the Slayers. It would be done for. Over. So you'd better not try to weasel out of your commitment now, buster!"

"Oh, no! I'd never! I'm…I'm…" Xelloss was a loss for words to express his relief.

"Good. Glad that's over. Listen, I gotta get off the phone. I'm wrinklin' up like a prune in the tub as it is. You okay now?"

Tub? ...ooOOoo…Bathing…ooOOoo…? He couldn't come over because she was taking a bath? Oh. OH? Oh, my… Lina in the bath…nude…

"XELLOSS!"

"Lina! Yes, I'm fine! All happy and everything!" he gasped.

"Gods, Xelloss…I was afraid you'd gone off and cut your wrists or somethin'…" she growled.

"Oh, no. Not me. I'm beyond all that. I'm just…relieved and happy to put this all behind me. Um…just one more thing…"

"Make it snappy."

"Might that be a bubblebath?"

The phone was silent on her side, and then she growled, "Xel-lossss!"

"Sorry! Never mind! Just joking, you know!" he laughed. "I'll let you go now. Bye…and ah, thanks!"

She had already hung up.

From the Authors:

Seyruun High Jinx now has a home! After that picture by Rat, ever wanted to see what the kids look like as envisioned by Frog? No? Well, you can anyway now that our staff photographer has been to their dimension and returned with photos! If you are interested, visit the website. Where? Please go to the author profile for Kaeru Shisho and choose the link. Hope to see you there! --KS

End Seyruun High Jinx –NEXT! Chapter Sixteen.