Seyruun High Jinx –NEXT!

Chapter 28

The ON ACID Chapter

Note: Count D belongs to Matusuri Akino, PetShop of Horrors, TokyoPop; Dee, Ryo, Bikky and Carol belong to Sanami Matoh, FAKE, TokyoPop.

"No girl should ever see her boyfriend wearin' a dress and lookin' prettier than her," Val remarked caustically.

Detective Ryo Maclean glared at his obstinate partner. "If you had turned in those reports on time, you wouldn't be here...I wouldn't be here, so I don't want to hear another complaint...not another word out of you!"

His partner, handsome, dark-haired, Dee Laytner, wanted to argue, but he knew that Ryo was maddeningly correct. He usually was, too. Correct, neat, orderly, sexy...

Dee was not... correct, neat, and orderly, that is. He was not a by-the-book kind of cop either, which had gotten them both into hot water with their chief. Now, the two men, partners both professionally and on their off-time, had security duty for a concert in Sairaag.

"I just meant that this is a real step down. I mean, we belong on the heels of some homicide culprit--not standing around playin' watchdog to a bunch of spoiled teeny-boppers!" Dee snuffed out his cigarette with his heel. "Sorry..."

That apology had cost him, and Ryo knew it. Ryo's dark brown eyes softened. He couldn't be mad at his lover for long, not after he had admitted his responsibility for their predicament. He smiled and placed a gentle hand on Dee's sleeve. "Getting Bikky those tickets and letting him invite Carol along tonight has made you the hero of the hour, you know. They had wanted to see the Slayers this summer when they played at the county fair. Remember? We were on that surveillance assignment and they had to miss it."

Dee's green eyes slid sideways. At least he'd made Ryo's adopted kid happy, well...his kid too, now. Then he looked up and was caught in Ryo's gaze. Ryo was nearly beautiful with those golden brown waves of hair framing his perfect face, belaying his Asian heritage, and when he smiled, like right now, Dee felt his heart flutter. Okay, he'd have to make it up to Ryo, later. "Yeah, well...I wish I'd brought earplugs, that's all I gotta say."

"You'll be fine. I understand the band's quite good, even if they are loud. Just a second, let me take this call. Yes, Detective Maclean speaking. The band is on its way. I got it. Can you talk to them? Good, then tell them to get down, out of sight below the van windows and have the driver go around the block to the underground parking entrance. Yes, the one that's blocked off. There's an officer there who will wave them in. From there, they can use the tunnel directly into the backstage entrance. Right. Let me know if there's any trouble. My partner and I are here out front directing the other officers for mob control."

A short time later, as the heavy mist turned to drizzle, Dee grunted. "They're lettin' in the crowd now. Hope Bikky and Carol get in all right."

Ryo smiled, "I knew you cared about the kids. Come on, looks like we're needed at the entrance now."

The entrance, where a small disturbance was flaring up...

"I AM with the band, or should be gettin' ready right now. Ya gotta let me in!" A skinny guy with platinum blonde hair cut in a strange pageboy style was trying to push his way past the door guards.

"You really should listen to him, officer. His name is 'Joey'. Just send someone in and ask for Gourry. This is his brother and a stand-in for the drummer," said a tall, mild-mannered woman, also blonde and obviously the boy's mother. "It won't take but a moment of your time, please."

But it was hopeless. Too many other kids had pulled similar stunts to fool these officers. But, there in the line were two other kids who thought that they recognized Joey.

"Joey? Joey Gabriev? Yeah...I know you! Hey, dude, man...officer! This is who he says he is! Let him in!" The two kids cried out. One, a boy about Joey's age but brown-skinned with gold hair, the other, a girl with wavy brown hair and a loud voice.

Joey turned to the kids attempting to help him, "Ah...Bikky, right? Soccer?"

Bikky grinned, "That's right. I my team blew your team outta the water last week. 'Course, we got slammed the next day so we're outta the finals too. Just as well 'cause I got basketball now."

"Yeah, my stupid brother forgot my games were done and didn't get me up for the van," Joey groused. "Now I don't know how I'm gonna get in!"

Bikky grinned widened. "You really do play with the band? Cool... so...ah...I gotta idea." He looked around, noting where Dee and Ryo were standing, and then let out a howl. "Ooooww!" He bent double and cried out more.

"Joey! What's wrong with that boy you were talking to!" his mother asked with concern. "You know him? Dear, what's wrong? Can we help you?" Mrs. Gabriev stood and called to the door guard. "Can you call for assistance, please? Let us in so we can let him lie down!"

"Now, ma'am, we can't do that..."

"Oooow Owooo!"

Ryo was first to reach his adopted son's side, "Bikky? Bikky! What happened?"

"We don't know," Mrs. Gabriev answered. "He was speaking to my son, then clutched his stomach. It was very sudden."

Ryo nodded. "Come on, let's get him inside."

So the Gabriev's followed Bikky, his girlfriend Carol, Ryo and eventually Dee into the concert hall. The moment Ryo set Bikky down, the boy broke into a run, yelling "Come on, Joey, follow me!"

"Why you little..."Dee grumbled and set off after the wayward boys.

Bikky sped past the main doors making for the stage area with Joey at his heels, "Gou-reeee! Leeeeeeee-na! Xel-lossss!" Joey screamed.

Zolf was stringing the last of the cables. Rodimus had only just arrived to setup the sound mixer after leaving the Slayers in wardrobe back stage. They both looked up when the noisy boys entered. "Whoa! What have we got here!" Zolf shouted.

"I-It's me! Joey...ah...Gourry's brother!" Joey panted as he reached the stage. "Where is he?"

"Backstage getting dressed. Wanna hand up?" Zolf offered first Joey, then Bikky, a hand. "And you are...?"

"That's Bikky. Friend of mine," Joey answered in that 13-year-old way of practically ignoring adults and the world not of immediate interest to them. "Oh...and that's...my mom and..." Joey looked askance at Bikky to fill in the names of the others thundering into the hall.

"Hurry up!" Bikky shouted. He leaned down and pulled up the tough-as-nails girl he'd brought to the concert. "This is Carol and those are...my dads...Ryo and stupid Dee."

Zolf figured the adults would be hot under the collar for awhile. "Rodimus? Take these kids back to see the others, okay? I'll speak to their parents."

So, while the kids disappeared backstage with Rodimus, the handsome Zolf turned on the charm to calm down the 'rents'. That was 'dads…' plural? "Hello! You must be Gourry and Joey's big sister, right?"

Mrs. Gabriev blushed. "Mother."

As Ryo and Dee surrounded them, she explained why she was here in Sairaag and not home doing the laundry. "...and so, Gourry probably just forgot that Joey was free to play this time. I'm so sorry to be so much trouble, officers."

Ryo looked past the stage hoping to catch a glimpse of the boys. "I'm afraid we brought along our own bundle of trouble."

Dee clenched his teeth; his green eyes narrowed, "That kid's gonna be the death of me...he's nothin' but trouble."

"Kind of like you," Ryo said with a sparkle in his dark brown eyes.

Zolf pointed off to the side. "There's some stairs. Come on up and I'll introduce you to the gang. Oh, I'm the road and stage manager, Zolf, and your boys just took off with the sound man, Rodimus."

Mrs. Gabriev climbed up and shook his hand, "Gourry was relieved to relinquish the driving duties, Mr. Zolf. I think that trip to Zephillia where they had to lug around all that equipment for the first time was tough on him. That's where they met you, correct?"

"Yes, ma'am. It was fortunate for all of us. Now, this way please."

Meanwhile, Rodimus knocked on the boys' dressing room, "Gotta minute?"

Xelloss opened the door. "Yes? Oh! Joey? What a surprise! And you've brought...friends? Oh… and here comes Mrs. Gabriev! I thought you had a soccer game, Joey?"

He stepped aside and shouted to the other guys, "You all decent? Company!" He sought out Gourry and pulled him aside. "I think your little bro is pissed off."

Gourry rubbed his temples with a big hand. "Ah..." He was not adept at disappearing. Perhaps it was due to his height or personality or maybe he just didn't have that magic touch. Whatever the reason, he simply stood his ground and waited. To his surprise, Xelloss stepped up and screened him from Joey's outrage.

"I think we should upgrade these peoples' seats. Don't you, Joey? " Xelloss offered. Turning his attention to the kids by his side, he continued, "We have some other friends coming. Would you like to sit with them?"

Bikky squinted, "Who're they?"

"Bikky! That's not polite!" Ryo admonished him.

Xelloss smiled, "Ah, one of them is Nuriko. You know the Su..."

"Suzaku Seven!" squealed Carol excitedly. "We're gonna sit with him! Ooooh, he's so cool!"

Bikky frowned, "Do I know that guy?"

Carol whispered in his ear and the boy blushed, darkening his already dark skin. "Oh..." He looked up at Xelloss. "He your boyfriend?"

Xelloss' eyebrows shot up, "No! He and someone else are accompanying my girlfriend and another lady tonight." To Gourry's mother he asked. "Would you like to stay? Nice... ah...Zolf? Can you take care of seating for Mrs. Gabriev and..."

"Bikky...and this is MY girlfriend, Carol!"

"Nice to meet you," Xelloss smiled and gallantly kissed the girl's hand. "Excuse me now; I'd better let Lina know about the change to the line up."

Carol nearly fainted. "I'll never wash this hand..."

"I'm gonna be sick..." Bikky moaned. "Fer real this time!"

Val jingle-jangled over, his hair newly gelled into pale green spikes. "Mis-sus Gabriev, what a plea-ant surprise tonight."

"Hello, Val. Aren't you glittery tonight!" she smiled.

"Yeah, polished the silver last night," he joked.

"I know you," Dee spoke up. "Detective Laytner, if you don't recall my name. You, I arrested you...one of the Gaav kids, on more than one occasion."

Val crossed his arms over his chest defiantly. He loomed a few inches over everyone in the room, except Gourry. "Past is past. Gaav's dead and I'm Val Agares now...with no record. You can look it up."

The two men with street smarts and checkered pasts traded glares.

"Dee...DEE! Settle down." Ryo turned his attention to the newest arrival from the dressing room depths. Involuntarily, the sensitive man placed a hand to his open mouth.

Zelgadiss tried to ignore the reaction as his fixed the final fastener on his armband. "Mrs. Gabriev? You might want to wear these earplugs. It's all right. I carry plenty of spares around."

Dee stepped in front of his silent partner. "You got more of those? Uh...I'm Detective Dee Laytner, and this is...my partner Detective Ryo Maclean."

Zelgadiss nodded and dug deep into his pocket. "Here's one pair. I have more in my bag., Just a minute..." He agilely wended his way through the small crowd to find another pair of earplugs, and then wound his way back. "Detective? "

Ryo blushed red. "Forgive me for staring. Please, I'm not usually so rude, but...I can't believe that it's possible but...about five years ago...maybe more...I was new on the force in Seyruun. And I received a call to a home of a university professor...where an explosion had..."

"It's me. I was the kid that nearly died. Instead, I'm here and putting my strange appearance to work."

"That's only part of the story!" Xelloss had returned and was ready to contribute to the conversation. "It's that amazing elven healing ability of his. You don't believe me? Check out those ears and his hair is wire!"

Zelgadiss, used to this kind of talk from his best friend, simply blushed and muttered something under his breath. Ryo stepped closer. "I'm sorry to have embarrassed you this way. I am truly pleased to find that you survived that blast. When I pulled you out, no one believed that you were alive, but I found your pulse. Right here." Ryo touched Zel's right wrist.

Zel nodded and pulled back his sleeve. "It's relatively untouched around this hand." He looked up into the sorrowful eyes of the detective. "I guess I owe you a debt of gratitude. My father was ready to call me dead at the time."

Dee closed in. "Your...father? I remembered grandf…er…don't matter. You must be the Greywords kid then? Geesh, and I thought it was all stage makeup you kids wore…"

Xelloss answered with a flourish, "Zelgadiss Greywords, my little brother."

Ryo looked on quizzically. "I didn't know you had a brother..."

Zel sighed, "I didn't. Xelloss is a...was a stepbrother when his mother married my father last year..."

Ryo's turn to gasp as Dee asked, "Xelloss...Metallium? Your mother was ...uh...died a few months ago, that one...Your house burned down..."

Dee stopped him. "JJ was with the arresting officer last year in some school bell tower. That wasn't you two...?"

Xelloss nodded. "Bing-go!"

"Then you're...no..." Ryo shook his head.

Xelloss smiled and ran a hand through his hair, brushing a few errant strands to the side. "Probably I am. Dubois was my second stepfather, after Gaav, Val's Gaav. See? Aren't we a cozy little band? Oh oh... here comes our fearless leader, the incomparable, the lovely, the...what was that you called her for the musical? Oh yeah, the Sorceress Supreme, Lina Inverse!"

Lina's entrance put an end to the detectives' recollections down the Slayers nightmare-memory lanes. It also washed all 'big, bad brother' thoughts clean out of little Joey's head. Lina could do that to people.

"What's going on here? Why all the people back here? Joey! Right, wanna go on out and check the setup on the drums? Who are all these people? Oh, Mrs. Gabriev, you hadta bring Joey? Sorry 'bout that. Next time I'll call 'im myself."

While Dee and Ryo introduced themselves as the officers in charge of security that evening, Gourry started to say something, but Xelloss held him back this time. "Hey, you tried, didn't you?"

Gourry looked down at Xelloss. Should he admit to trying to keep him and Lina from performing that song/dance number? He certainly seemed to be trying to mend their friendship. "I didn't think Candy would appreciate...the timing wasn't so great fer..."

Xelloss shook his head, "I agree, and I meant that-- thanks for trying."

"Then you'll be...tonin' it down some?"

Xelloss smiled, "What would Lina think?"

Gourry frowned a bit in thought. "I guess ya can't, huh?"

"No, but...I can keep my professional distance." Xelloss shrugged his shoulders as if to say 'whatever that means.'

"'Preciate it," Gourry grumbled. "Hey, Mom? Time to go. We're gonna tune up so you can find yer new seats, 'kay?"

The concert was simply an amazing experience for the audience and for the Slayers. 1500 kids were already squirming in their seats, with nearly that many more waiting in lines yet to come in. By start time, the hall was filled to capacity, the noise level rising with the temperature inside.

"We don't need any warm up band tonight!" Lina shouted to the crowd amid screams. "You guys sound hot already! Yeah! Right! So...no matter what...Ya know what I mean? Never give up!"

And she launched into the first number of the evening, then the next, then another few before cooling it down with Zel's soul-searching numbers and Filia's haunting solo.

They were dressed in costumes which could only be labeled as punk-pirate. The girls all wore striped tights in differing colors, loose, low-cut peasant-type blouses and either black short-shorts or short skirts. Filia added a black leather vest and Lina sported an enormous feathered pirate captain's hat and long red jacket with gleaming gold buttons. Val had found a black and white striped bandana, which he tied around his head instead of his plain black one. Besides that, he stuck with his customary black leather vest and pants, with plenty of shining silver chains. Oh, he had found a pair of large gold hoop earrings, one of which he was wearing and the other he gave to Zelgadiss. Zelgadiss wore his ivory-colored poet's shirt tied loosely with a long red sash which draped down and trailed alongside his black leather pants, typically low-key. Gourry was flashier in his long-legged striped pants, shimmering red satin shirt visible beneath his black leather vest and studded belt. The single unifying element– they all wore knee-high black leather boots. These were part of the costume design of Zel's, so they all went out and bought the boots and made them a part of the band's costuming as well.

Gourry's rocker, Val's solo, Amelia's...Lina and Gourry sang a duet, and then she introduced Joey for her routine with Xelloss. She liked to close out the first part with that before going to break.

"Ready?" she whispered to Xelloss while Joey was getting in place.

"Yes. You? We haven't practiced in a long time." he reminded her. His costume was a copy of Zel's, except his shirt was black. He adjusted his sash to the side.

"Don't need to. We're too good a team." Lina gave him a smug grin, ripped off her hat, and sent it sailing into Amelia's outstretched arms. Next, she slipped out of the heavy jacket and tossed it onto the floor where Sylphiel scooped it up. Cooler and freer to move, she then nodded to Joey to cut the bum-da-dum stripper drum roll and to begin the 'Sexy, Sexy' introduction.

Xelloss had not been in close contact with Lina for some time, and, true, as the song proceeded, they sang and danced flawlessly, but the moment she touched his arm he was electrified. When he locked eyes with her, sparks flew. It was the most intense experience he had ever felt, and it showed. Adding to his natural attraction to Lina was his body's current lack of medication. He always laid off the ADD meds the day of a performance. He needed to feel the intensity of the crowd and let if flow through and energize him to play in the fevered tempo that the Slayers favored for most of their music, Lina's songs in particular. The burnout following a performance would bring him down hard, but it was worth it. He figured that he was making the most out of his condition, which brought him grief in his day-to-day life, but remarkable levels of energy, creativity, and stamina when his mental state demanded it. Although it made him appear unpredictable and goofy at times, it also gave him an edge, if he learned to funnel all that chaos correctly.

Like right now, for instance. The audience was brought to its feet, so caught up were they in the passionate frenzy. It was more than Xelloss' limited self-control could take. He slipped up a tiny bit. At the end, he finished by planting a major kiss upon Miss Lina's upturned lips. The audience went wild. Lina pushed him off and took hold of the microphone. "Take a break. We'll be back in fifteen!"

Sitting in the front, reserved, box seats, Nahga was carrying on about how 'made for each other' Lina and Xelloss had appeared. With a well-placed nudge, Nuriko directed her attention to the look of dismay painted across the face of Xelloss' girlfriend. "Aw, it's all an act, ya know! Why, they're great in the acting department, and I should know, I've been to one of their plays...Shakespeare, if you can believe that! Besides, she's already got at least one boyfriend, that tall blonde hunk with the guitar, and he has...well you! Oh ho ho ho hooooo!"

But Candy wasn't so sure. She hadn't known Xelloss long and in that time he always seemed wrapped up in the band and its personnel. Maybe Lina was the reason. But if that were true, why had he invited her along to hear and see them? See... that dance. She didn't know he could dance, although he had told her that he wanted to take her dancing sometime. Nahga, that girl, was probably right about the act. This was one big performance for them all. Yes, it was all about entertaining the paying customers. Still, it made Candy uneasy. She wished Xelloss would come out and say hi to her, but she knew that wasn't possible.

Mrs. Gabriev took exception to Nahga's statement. "I'm afraid Gourry hasn't a girlfriend right now, dear. Lately, however, he has been seeing that pretty girl, Sylphiel. I do have to agree, though," the woman smiled kindly at Candy, "That was all an act. Joey told me that when they practiced the dancing, there was no romance involved, just business. Besides, Lina really isn't his type at all. So, Candy, you must be that wonderful young lady I've heard so much about. Gourry's told me Xelloss talks about you all the time. You go to the university?"

Candy brightened at this news and soon fell into a comfortable conversation about college life with Gourry's mother. Nuriko and John relaxed now that that issue was resolved and spoke quietly to one another.

Their quiet tete-de-tete was interrupted by the younger Carol's curious stares. "Are we ignoring you? Sorry," Nuriko smiled.

"So how do you guys know the Slayers?" Carol asked.

John spoke up first. "I met Xelloss at the university, at the student residence where Candy lives."

"And my band toured with them last summer," Nuriko answered.

That began a very funny and long retelling of some of the tour highlights, none of which Mrs. Gabriev had heard before and all of which were extremely entertaining.

Just before the young Bikky's jealousy got the better of him, Carol turned all her attention on him and said, "You never told me about all these rock star connections of yours. You are so full of surprises! This has been the best date ever!" She marked him with a quick kiss of her own, making him blush for the second time that day, but certainly making it the best one that he could remember!

In no time the break was over, the lights dimming, and the show was about to start its second half.

All hell did cut loose that day when the entertainment was over and the crowd wanted a piece of their favorite band member. Talk about 'tough love'!

While Dee and Ryo concerned themselves with the officers controlling the crowds and Zolf and Rodimus dealt with the equipment, the Slayers huddled backstage wondering what to do next. Big-name acts, world-renowned stars, have planned escape-routes, but The Slayers hadn't even considered going to such measures. But now they couldn't just leave, the place was surrounded!

Xelloss and Val were laughing about it, clearly excited to have reached 'star status' at such an early age. Joey bounced from Xelloss to Zelgadiss, trying to be both cool about everything and boyishly thrilled at the same time. Cute, very cute. Sylphiel and Amelia were effervescent, their giggles bubbling over and soon, infecting even Filia, who for some reason was in a somber mood. Gourry was pretty pleased, all around, with the whole performance. He had busied himself with his instrument during the intense dance moments of 'that number' and so had missed the kiss. And since Lina was not punched out Xelloss' lights yet, Gourry figured he'd kept that 'professional distance' he'd talked so much about. Zelgadiss was keeping one eye on Lina and the other on Xelloss, when he wasn't distracted, with good excuse, by Amelia's breathless exhilaration. Lina was like a dynamo, generating excitement as she spun between the Xelloss/Val group and the Sylphiel/Amelia one. A real, palpable energy could have been detected, if one had the proper tools; an energy flowing in a current of growing intensity around and around the room of charged up teenagers.

Once the two detectives had seen to the band's immediate safety, they began to think about their other charges. "What's going to happen to Bikky and Carol out there?" Ryo wondered aloud.

"I'm wondering more about us..." Dee said through gritted teeth. "Oh, all right. Let's go see where the kids have gotten off to."

They found the two kids with Mrs. Gabriev and the other three friends, pressed up near the stage, against the outer wall.

Zolf saw the problem and remembered and old trick from the past. He connected a few wires, crossed them, and blew a fuse with a bang and a lot of smoke. Dee and Ryo used the diversion to heft the kids and adults onto the stage, and push them past the smoke screen to the back. With a lot of effort, and a little of Zolf's stage magic, kids and adults were whisked backstage to safety.

Seeing the detectives returning with their 'guests' looking pale and drawn, brought Lina back to reality. "Okay," Lina began. "We gotta few problems. We got folks out there to clear outta the building, which is going okay, right guys?"

Dee, nodding from his cell phone, indicated 'affirmative'.

"Right. Then, we got a few thousand dollars of equipment to pack up and get on the road to Seyruun."

"No problem there, Miss Lina," Zolf assured her. "It can be stored here overnight with Rodimus, me or both of us guarding it, if need be, although, I think we'll be able to drive it out in an hour or so. The problem is you kids."

"The problem includes Gourry's mother and our other friends here," Lina argued. "We wanna know that they're safe too."

Xelloss exchanged looks with Zelgadiss. Zelgadiss stood up, indicating he had something to say, while Xelloss punched a number into his cell phone. "Lina? Ah, we have an...idea to get us out of here." He pointed straight up with a finger.

"UP? What? You want me to fly out or something?" Lina asked.

"Yes," Zel said curtly.

Xelloss put away his phone and slammed his hand against the top of a small table hard enough to splinter it. "Damn! My next purchase will be a helicopter of my own. Maybe an aerie of them," he bit off in anger. Things like this had always gone smoothly in the past, of course, he'd been dealing with the syndicate, back then.

Mrs. Gabriev, who had only seen the slightly goofy, overly polite side of Xelloss, started in surprise at his sudden temper. Candy and John were clearly uncomfortable following the outburst. Even Candy's meager understanding of Xelloss' ADD condition led her wonder if it made him unbalanced.

"A hanger full of helicopters, I believe, is the correct terminology you're searching for," Zelgadiss said dryly.

John laughed, "Right..."

Xelloss stared at him. Of course, that was part of his secret life. He was slipping. Just how aware Xelloss was of the turmoil his actions could bring, was unclear. He looked down, covering his face with his bangs a moment, and then smiled. "A man can have dreams, right?" he said, and then to Mrs. Gabriev he smiled apologetically and added, "I must be tired."

He looked all the world like a forlorn boy missing his mother. Mrs. Gabriev moved closer and gave him a reassuring hug. "Go talk to your nice girlfriend, dear."

Xelloss instead asked, "Are there really that many kids still out there?"

No one noticed when he disappeared. Zelgadiss really should have grown a third eye, because he only had two, one dedicated to Lina while the other had currently strayed away from Xelloss to be fully taken in by Amelia.

"We need another plan..." Lina began. "How 'bout you cops? Got any ideas? I'm not stayin' holed up in here all night until you guys clear the area. What's wrong with goin' back out through that tunnel thing to the parking garage again?"

Ryo and Dee spoke in private a few minutes. Ryo, quieter, inhibited, kept his arms folded over his chest; Dee the animated loud-mouth, waved and gesticulated. "Dee, the door's jammed, I told you. We'll just have to wait a little longer until they get a man to cut through."

"Longer? In a room full of teenagers and…BIKKY!" Dee flung up his arms in the all-familiar 'I give up' salute.

Nahga took the break in the conversation to slither over to Val and claim his attention. "I got plenty of friends we could stay with. Why don't we just split now? If we go in twos, you won't be spotted."

Filia, standing within hearing range– and with Nahga's loud voice to match her brassy personality, that didn't mean a terribly close proximity– practically snarled like an injured lioness...very dangerous lady, indeed.

SEQ CHAPTER h r 1Candy was feeling a little lost and bewildered, never having been on an outing with the Slayers before. "Where's Xelloss, Zel?" Candy asked.

"Ah..." Zel whipped his head around. Where, indeed?

Without warning, Filia and Nahga were in a stand off. Nahga, the older, experienced and worldly one, dressed like a hooker in her tight leather halter top and briefest of skirts, stood to her full height in her attempt to look down her nose at the other girl. Filia, not dressed much more tastefully in her Slayers punk-pirate-wrench apparel, lifted her chin, tossed her full mane of shiny blonde hair and lowered her eyelids in a haughty expression. They stood still, measuring one another, and then slowly, they took turns circling each other. Both were beautiful young women; Nahga, tall, pale and dark-haired, sensuous and brash, and Filia, tall and fair, sun-kissed and glowing with good health and good breeding.

A shrill screech and rising roar of cries and shrieks could be heard in the distance above the drone of screams, cries, and hollers that they had been listening to for over the past several hours. Something was up out there!

"Oh gods..." Zel groaned in answer to Candy's question. "Go get one of those detectives to rescue him. He's...out there..."

"Nice boots," Nahga admitted, her eyes raking the other girl's figure from head to foot appraisingly, and landing on the foot.

"Thanks." Filia meted out her praise in trade. "I like your skull necklace."

"Size 8?"

Filia made a tiny movement akin to a nod.

Nahga smiled, hands on her hips. "Wanna trade?"

Filia nodded and smiled in return. She motioned with her hand towards the girls' dressing room. "I've looked everywhere for that top. Think I could find it in my size anywhere in Seyruun?"

"Gods, Seyruun! Sairaag, honey, has the rag shops you're lookin' for." Nahga draped an arm over Filia's shoulders and led on. "Oh, ho ho ho ho hoooooh! Whatta hoot! I just love this girl, Val! We are gonna get along just fine!"

Val sat on the floor, gaping after them. "What just happened here?"

Ryo and Dee pushed a wild-haired and breathless Xelloss ahead of them into the room. "There," Dee said with the sound of a click of a closing manacle. He locked the end not enclosing Xelloss wrist to an exposed drainpipe, shackling him to the wall. "That outta keep you outta mischief. Ya gotta be either stupid or nuts ta try a stunt like that...stickin' yer head out into that mess of screaming, squirming teenage hormones, and by the look of ya, I can't tell which!"

Xelloss, offended, started to complain. "Liiina! Don't let them do this to meeeee!"

Lina shook the cobwebs out of her head, "I gotta get outta here, that's all I know. Shuddup, Xelloss, you nitwit! You deserve whatever you get!"

"Dee!" Ryo stuffed his cell phone into his jacket, ran a hand through his hair, exasperated, and turned to Dee with more bad news. "Apparently, the metal worker with the torch had to be awakened from bed...with a bad cold. He just got here. So, the wait for cutting through that door is just got a little longer. Perhaps we could call for paddy wagons and empty the squad room of officers to run herd on the crowd and just hustle everyone into the vans through the front door somehow and take them..."

"...to one of the safe-houses!" Dee finished. "Yeah, not too bad an idea, but...they stand out too much. There's no way we could get them past that crowd to vans even if we used the whole precinct!

Mrs. Gabriev cleared her throat. "Safe-houses? Excuse me, but what would happen to our cars? I don't want my van to get towed away."

"Just give me your license plate numbers and make of cars and I'll make sure they're here for you tomorrow when you come back," Ryo said.

"How many will one hold?" Dee asked.

"The safe-house? Everyone for a few hours, but for an overnight...six or seven. Depends on the size," Ryo answered, measuring the people around him in his head. "We could put the band kids in one and the others (Candy, Nuriko, John, Mrs. Gabriev)...the two younger kids...maybe Joey too...in another place..."

"Not me!" Joey intoned. "I stick with the band this time!"

"Oh, ho ho ho hoooo! What do you think?" Nahga asked.

Val, and nearly everyone else, followed Nahga's voice to the dressing room door. Val's eyes then proceeded to nearly pop out as the visions of absolute perfection from out of his most fevered dreams sauntered into view. Nahga and Filia had traded tops and her skirt for Filia's shorts. To make Filia's vest fit, however, Nahga unlaced it most of the way. Zelgadiss blinked and forgot to breathe.

"Hey, Zel!" Gourry called out. "Just like your costume idea, huh?"

"Oh yes...well...ah..." Zel managed to say as eloquently as expected.

"Oh, I think both you girls look hot, very hot!" John smiled and gave them both a hug.

"Thanks, honey," Nahga replied. "Ya know, there's all kinds of stuff hangin' back there."

Nuriko gasped aloud, looking dangerously enlightened. "Show me!" And he dashed off with Nahga and John in the lead. "Oh, my gods...perfect...Per-fect!" His voice could be heard, though muffled by the curtains. "All right, gang. I have the solution to all our problems!"

Lina narrowed her eyes. That sounded too good to be true. "Oh yeah?"

"I want to see! Let me go freeeeee!" Xelloss wailed from his prison wall, managing to walk right into it despite being chained to a drain pipe.

Candy wrapped him in a sympathetic arm and leaned her head on his back. "I don't have a key." If she had one, she wouldn't unlock him, but she didn't tell him that. "I'll rub your back so you can relax, okay?"

"...'kay..." he said in a very, very small voice, and smiled.

Nuriko was in an expansive mood. "Yes! The girls, we hide your hair and dress you like boys, and the guys go in drag!" Nuriko grinned triumphantly and slapped hands with John. "You won't be recognized!"

Lina nodded, "Sounds like a good plan to me. Yo, detectives? Can you get the transports here? Okay, we'll be ready to go in half an hour or less."

"Oh, well now," the honey-haired detective, Ryo, objected. "I don't think that this is a good idea...Mrs. Gabriev, I'm sure you can see... Ah... excuse me, my cell phone again...I can't imagine what could go wrong now..."

"What!" Gourry, Zel, Xelloss, and Val all shouted together. What was Lina thinking! Making them up like girls! She wouldn't! No!

"Ya gotta be kidding!" Dee snorted. He might have a boyfriend, but he wouldn't be caught dead, particularly dead, in a dress either. "We men have got to stand firm here!"

Filia smiled, "Yeah, whatever..."

Sylphiel smiled, "Heh,hee... you want to play dress up too Mr. Detective?" and Amelia cried out, "Let's get to work!"

Sylphiel got started immediately. She pushed Gourry toward the dressing room. "You and Val will be the hardest to fit!"

"N-N-uh..." Gourry sputtered.

John was holding a long pink skirt out to show. "I think there's a scarf that would be perfect to pull the whole look together. His shoulders are too wide for anything revealing. What do you think?"

Gourry gagged.

Filia nodded, "Oh yeah. What about his hair?"

"Oh, leave that to me!" Sylphiel giggled. "I saw the cutest thing Bunny did with her hair, you know, with the buns and pigtails?"

"Oooooh!" Amelia and Filia cooed like a pair of turtle doves.

"Isn't anybody listenin' ta meee" Gourry hollered.

"Oh, ho ho ho ho ho hooooo! Forget it, blondie! I'm more audacious than any of you, and no one's much listenin' to me!"

Gourry's expression as he passed Nahga was nothing short of withering.

Val stifled a scream when he felt Filia's talons tighten on his shoulder. "Come now, Vally-dear, and find out what new fashion look is in store for you. Nuriko? What have you got in a tall, extra large?"

"Oh, it's lavender and lovely, with a sweep of floral chiffon."

Val howled.

"These kids are all nuts!" Dee exclaimed. "Ryo? How's that door coming along?"

Ryo sighed. "They had to send for another torch...the first one shorted out, I believe..."

"Oh, just kidding, Val….sweetheart," Nuriko laughed and slapped Val on the arm. "Basic black with those studs."

"First, before your fitting, Val-dear," Filia said with a good hard shove, "that hair gets washed!"

"I'm a star! I AM A STAR! I don't gotta do shit!"

"I'll take it from here, sweetie," Nuriko chortled as he strong-armed Val to a sink. "I just qualified for my black belt last summer, so don't go getting any ideas that you have any say in this."

Val gave him a darkening look. "Ah, go ahead and mind the rest of the la-dees, Nuriko. I'll wash out the gel..."

"How about me? What'll I wear?" Joey, fearing he'd been overlooked and forgotten again, demanded his share of attention.

"Ah, now...not the kid..." Dee protested. "Ain't his mom here to protect him?"

John put a hand on Joey's shoulder and made a big show of looking the pretty boy over, turning him around and around. "Honey, you don't need a thing. You are perfect just the way you are."

"B-But I need a disguise!" Joey insisted, missing the innuendo entirely.

"Come with me and let's pick out a nice dress then," John laughed and led him away to the closet.

"Oh, for the love of..." Dee grumbled. "Ryo? Ryo? Where did you go off to now? Ya gotta help me put a stop to all this!"

"Zelgadiss?" Amelia and Nuriko stood on either side of the retiring young man. "Your turn."

Zel stood up and brushed off his pants. "This...will never work," he insisted.

Ryo nodded in agreement. "I think we should try and find another way to do this. It's really not necessary to go to all this much trouble...That door might actually get cleared."

Zel shrugged at that news, and then stood, arms wrapped closely around his middle, and observed the clothes on display with scrutiny reserved usually for choosing a new guitar, or car. "No. Not that red one."

"I agree," Nuriko smiled. "I was thinking Xelloss. I always imagined him in red...Oh, I'm just kidding, Zelgadiss! Really, you're too serious at times! Let's just have fun with this!"

"Fun..." Zel muttered and thumbed through the selections. "How about this white one? Seems loose enough."

"Oooh, silk. Slinky. Nice eye, Zel. Give it a try!"

Zel shook his head in wonder at his own compliance. "The sooner this is over, the better."

"But you weren't even listening to me!" Ryo cried out. "This isn't necessary at all!"

Zelgadiss sighed. "I already have to listen and answer to Lina's will. That's all I can handle. If you want action, you go convince her first."

"Shall I take the red one to Mr. Xelloss then?"

"Why not? Thanks, Amelia." Nuriko turned his attention to Lina who was plowing through a pile in the 'lost and found' box.

"Any keepers?" he asked.

"Check this one out!" she grinned and stuffed a slouch hat on her head and tossed a small man's jacket over her shoulder. "Sam Spade...private investigator!"

"Oh, that works...very smooth..." Nuriko praised her. "You might want to pin up that gorgeous hair of yours. It's a dead give away."

Lina blushed with pleasure. "Yeah...I look great in anything!"

"Oh, for gods'sakes...and these kids take orders from her?" Dee muttered and patted down his sides for a cigarette. "Sam Spade my ass… We're the friggin' detectives, here…"

"Um...Mr. Xelloss? I have a...um...dress for you to put on, though I don't know how you can manage with one arm like that."

Xelloss turned his face away, sulking. "How sad."

"It's a pretty dress," Candy said. "Chinese." She took the dress off the hanger and smiled apologetically back at Amelia.

Xelloss looked at Candy out of the corner of one eye. "Then you wear it."

"Come on...just a little look?"

"I haven't the shoulders for...Oh...it's not too bad is it? Oh, Deee-eee! Come set me freee-eee!"

"Hey, he's singin' my song!" Gourry laughed for the first time since he'd entered his miserable state of enslavement.

Dee looked at them both, his eyes landing on Xelloss last, hard green eyes meeting glittery pleading purple ones. "Ferget it! I'm goin' outside for a smoke!" Dee stomped off in a dark mood.

It was Bikky who unlocked the handcuffs. Grinning he jangled the keys. "I ripped them off when he wasn't lookin'."

"Thanks!" Xelloss sighed rubbing at his newly-freed wrist. "Now..."

Candy took one arm, Amelia the other, and they marched him to the dressing room before he had a chance to act on any other ideas. Damn. That was a plan down the drain…

Meanwhile, Gourry was in makeup with Sylphiel. "Just a bit more eye shadow... Oh, Gourry-dear...it's...it's... Mrs. Gabriev, come look! Does the eyeliner look straight to you?"

"I think you could use a shave, dear, but you'll be fine in the dark," his mother chuckled and patted her 'son' on the head.

"Aw, Ma...!"

"You're done then! I guess, I'd better find my clothes. Now, just stay put and don't, you know, muss up anything!" Sylphiel warned Gourry.

"Over here, Sylph! There's a great coat here!" Lina called from the depths. "You'll look like a Wookie!"

Val was toweling off his hair while Filia was searching the box for her outfit. "How 'bout that baseball jacket?" he pointed to a worn, but clean white and red one on top.

"Sure, I'll give it a try. What about my hair though?"

"Tuck it under the coat and wear the cap. Yeah, yer a regular jock."

"Oh, Caaaandy? Can you help me with my...zipper?" Xelloss erupted into laughter that threatened to overwhelm him soon. "Look at these slits up the sides!" He wriggled out of the dressing room and whipped open a fan. With a coy peek over the top he asked, "Well?"

Candy stared aghast at her boyfriend.

"No girl should ever see her boyfriend wearin' a dress and lookin' prettier than her," Val remarked caustically.

"Nice legs!" John chuckled. "Nice biceps, too."

"Yeah, better wear a shawl to cover up those big, bad muscles," Val snorted. "...and the lack of any..."

"Time to get into your dress, Vally," Filia reminded him. "And you had better hope you look as convincing!" That shut him up.

Ryo had sunk into a chair next to Mrs. Gabriev. "I'm sorry, Ma'am," he said politely. "This isn't the sort of action that I'd recommend."

"That's okay, dear. The kids are just fooling around and having a little harmless fun. I have four boys and two girls that I call my own; these are my oldest. You have the one boy?"

"Six children! Oh, my...well...yes. Just Bikky, and sometimes, it seems, Carol, too. But he's a real hand-full."

She smiled, "I can see that. He's very clever and intelligent, like his father."

"Which one?"

Just as the Slayers were all dressed up, Ryo received the call he'd been expecting all evening, almost. The tunnel door was a double walled unit and they'd only just cut through the first layer. If they wanted to go home anytime soon, another way would be required. This cheering call was followed closely by another. The paddy wagons were on their way. "Dee? We need a plan to get these people from here to the vans in one piece."

"We oughtta make it look like we've arrested them, right? Put the black belts on the outside just in case..."

Ryo nodded, "Let's get started then... Okay everybody, time to go!"

From the Authors:

Where are the pictures?

Seyruun High Jinx has a home. Please go to the author profile for Kaeru Shisho and choose the link. You will find the contest results as well as pictures under Seyruun High Jinx NEXT. Pictures for each of the other stories are associated with their links.

KS

End Seyruun High Jinx –NEXT! Chapter 28.