Disclaimer: Not mine.

Warnings: Naked bishies. Really!

Author: Koneko Shido

A/N: Enjoy...

Question Time 18

[At Yugi's house]

Yugi: What's up, Jou? You look weird.

Jou: Weird? Oh, thanks a lot.

Yugi: You know what I mean! Not weird like Bakura and Ryou, just weird as in less happy than usual.

Jou: Oh.

Yugi: And are you going to tell me why?

Jou: Kaiba.

Yugi: Oh? What did he do now, rape you?

Jou: blink

Yugi: What??

Jou: ...nothing. Anyway, I was whining at him because he totally skipped the romance and dating part of our 'relationship' and got straight to the...erm... other bits.

Yugi: Sex?

Jou: Er... yeah. And some other stuff, but you really don't need to know about that because if I tell you I think Yami will hurt me.

Yugi: Ok!

Jou: So anyway, he finally agreed to take me out on a date because I followed him to work and didn't stop whining even when he threatened to have me shot.

Yugi: He'd really shoot you?!

Jou: Hah! Of course not! He'd pay someone else to do it. Anyway, that's not the point!

Yugi: Then what is the point?

Jou: I don't know what to wear.

Yugi: That's your big crisis?!

Jou: Yes?

Yugi: Fiiiine. Ooh, Yami and I can help!!! YAMI!!! Get in here!!!!

Yami: From the next room But Jerry Springer is on!!

Yugi: NOW, OR NO SEX TONIGHT!!

Yami: Yes, dear. slinks in the room looking whipped

Jou: Hey, I thought you were supposed to be all sweet and innocent!

Yugi: sweet smile I am!

Yami: mutter

Yugi: Right, Yami, we have to help Jou pick out some clothes for his date with Kaiba tonight.

Jou: ...yeah. Worried now...

Yami: I'll get the leather.

Yugi: I'll get the buckles!

Jou: I'll just stand here looking disturbed.

Yami: Ok, your regular clothes are in the way, so they must be sent to the shadow realm. sends Jou's clothes to the realm of evil scary things

Jou: Argh! naked

Yugi: snicker

Jou: Could you please not do that?!

Yami: Too late, already done it.

Yugi: Here, you can put on these leather pants to cover yourself up. And look, they even have studs down the sides!

Jou: These should be illegal.

Yami: They are illegal.

Jou: ...riiiight. By the way, I had no idea you could send people's clothes to the shadow realm.

Yami: Fun, isn't it?

Jou: Have you ever done it to your opponent in the middle of a duel?

Yami: Would I do something that dishonourable?

Yugi: Yup.

Jou: So what happened?

Yami: It didn't work.

Jou: Why?

Yami: I tried it on Kaiba.

Jou: So it didn't make his clothes vanish?

Yami: It did, he just didn't care.

Jou: ...what?

Yami: I sent his clothes to the shadow realm, and he just looked down at himself standing there completely naked, shrugged, and got on with the duel.

Jou: Weird. Was anyone watching, other than you?

Yami: Malik, Marik, Yugi, Ryou, Bakura, Mokuba, Otogi and Honda.

Yugi: Mokuba screamed. So did Honda.

Jou: I'm not surprised.

Yami: Bakura and Marik want me to teach them how to banish clothes. Do you think I should?

Jou: It could mean the end of civilization, but it's really up to you. Are all these buckles really necessary?

Yugi: Absolutely!

Jou: What the hell is that?!

Yugi: Eyeliner?

Jou: You want to put makeup on me?!

Yami: I wear that.

Jou: Er-I mean, not that there's anything wrong with guys wearing makeup...

Yugi: Hold still... There, you look very pretty!

Jou: squeak Pretty?!

Yami: Sexy.

Jou: I'm scared...

Yami: purr You should put some chains on that outfit.

Jou: Yugi! Save me from Yami!

Yugi: Oh, chains! I totally forgot about them!

Jou: What?! Hey, what the- I'm not wearing this, I look like a whore!

Yugi: Yup!

Yami: Heheheh.

Jou: Kaiba's going to take one look at this outfit and skip dinner.

Yami: Don't pretend you don't like it.

Yugi: Yep, romance is overrated.

Yami: True. Sex is a lot more fun.

Jou: Can I please leave now?? whimper

TBC

Koneko: gives cookies to reviewers