This was getting long, so I decided to split it into two chapters. Both chapters cross over to another RahXephon fanfiction story I wrote, "Lost Melody," a prequel about Ayato and Haruka when they were in junior high. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: RahXephon and its characters are the property of their respective owners. This piece is not for profitable purposes.

Chapter 7: My Son – Part I

Within limitations, Shirou and I allow Ayato to behave as he so chooses and support him in his decisions. Although both Shirou and I work, I dedicate as much time as I can to Ayato and his upbringing. When he was little, he enjoyed playing with blocks. Curious, I gave him paper, crayons, paint, and colored pencils. As I had guessed, he started to use these, and his skill was impressive for his age. I encouraged him in this venue because of his enjoyment – and because of its indicative nature regarding his ability as an instrumentalist. When he was an elementary student, he entered a national contest and won first place. The three of us celebrated with a short trip to Kyoto, which Ayato greatly enjoyed.

I avoid Narcal and have intentionally never mentioned Itsuki. I am angered by Otou-san's continuing loyalty to Narcal, so I speak little with him; Ayato only knows him as the Rikudoh-san who is an archeologist like his father.

I am surprised one spring before Ayato starts junior high when he asks me to go with Shirou to help at the archaeological site. I am concerned about his safety, but Shirou assures me of this and Ayato is insistent. I finally relent, but am worried the entire time they are gone.

When Ayato returns, I am startled by a change in him. Ayato has never been an unhappy child, I would always describe him as content. But now, his mood has changed drastically, he seems happier and more attentive to certain things. Was the dig really that interesting for him? I question him, but learn only that he 'enjoyed it,' and 'probably would want to do it again.' Shirou says that I should be pleased, and while I can agree with him, I have lingering concerns.

Relatively early on in his first year of junior high, I am surprised when he wakes up on a Sunday much earlier than usual.

As he walks near me, I say, "Good morning, Ayato."

"Morning, Kaa-san, Tou-san. Oh, I wanted to let you know, I have a friend coming over to study today."

Remembering earlier instances similar to this, I say, "Really? Mamoru-kun?"

He is silent for a moment before he answers, "Well, actually, no, someone else."

Curious, I am about to say something when he continues.

"Well, her name…"

Startled and upset I say, "Her name?"

"Yes, as I was saying, her name is Mishima, Mishima Haruka."

Mishima Haruka, a girl? Ayato has always dedicated himself to his art, which is how it should be for an instrumentalist. When I was preparing to be an Ollin, I paid no heed to boys and had few friends; a girlfriend would only distract him.

"I don't remember giving you permission to date, Ayato."

Appearing angry, he says in a raised tone, "It's not a date! She's coming here to study!"

I sense Shirou looking at me and then hear him say, "Maya, there's nothing wrong with that, right?"

Disappointed that Shirou does not agree with me, but deciding I will handle this if anything develops, I say, "All right, all right."

"Thanks, Kaa-san, Tou-san! Oh, I'm leaving for a while."

Again surprised, I say, "Leaving, aren't you going to have breakfast, and where are you going, Ayato?"

"I'm not hungry, but thanks. I'm going to get some snacks and drinks for the study session."

Shirou chuckles and Ayato looks to him and says, "What's so funny?"

"Nothing, nothing," Shirou answers.

Before I can say anymore, Ayato rushes out the door.

That afternoon, I meet this Mishima Haruka – and notice how Ayato acts around her. It's obvious he has feelings for her, and I am concerned that she may encourage these emotions in him. I decide that action is not required immediately, but that I will need to monitor this more closely, especially since the end of the Mayan calendar is approaching. As time passes, my concerns grow. During the summer, he is more excited than he ever was about a school trip. On a winter day near Christmas, he runs out the door, a blue bag in his hand. The following spring, he starts spending more time away from the house on weekends, supposedly 'with friends' and even joins a gardening club that meets in the morning – a club in which he had never previously expressed interest. Convinced about the course of events, I make a decision; Ayato's destiny shall not be tainted, he is to tune the world, and, as the Conductor, it is my responsibility to act.

The Saturday afternoon before the end of the Mayan calendar, when Ayato is out doing chores, I confront Shirou.

"Shirou."

A serious expression on his face, he answers, "Yes, Maya?"

"I'm sure that you understand the intent of all of my actions."

"Yes, I do."

"Since that girl first came here, I haven't been convinced that you have been acting in the same vein."

"No – I haven't always been supportive."

"Fate can sometimes be cruel, Shirou. Ayato was not meant to be like others, loving one over all. An instrumentalist must consider what is best for everyone, not himself."

"You're going to do something about that, aren't you, Maya?"

"Shirou, my obligations as Ayato's Conductor precede anything else that can exist in my life and – you've shown that you can't support me in that."

He looks down at the floor and is silent for quite some time.

He looks up at me finally and says, "The end of the Mayan calendar is almost here. I've always thought I've known what you would do that day – especially considering your distrust and dislike towards Lord Bähbem. I'm not going to try to stop you in that, or in your plans for Ayato, I know that you are doing what you believe is right for this world."

He stands and surprises me by embracing me and saying, "I'll leave a note saying I had an urgent business trip, you can tell him what you want after. I know I don't have to say 'take good care of him,' that's what you've always done, and always will."

I stand motionless as he packs and drives away, filled with conflicting emotions, but, in the end, resolute.

The next day, Ayato leaves again to 'spend time with friends,' and I await his return.

At last, the door opens, Ayato seems surprised to see me there waiting.

"Oh, Kaa-san, hi."

"I've been waiting, Ayato."

"I didn't know you'd be home, I thought you were at work. I'm sorry, did we say we were going to do something today?"

Angered by his comments, I answer, "No, I believe you had plans today with Mishima Haruka, and tomorrow, and likely the day after that."

He appears shocked, and I continue, "You're acting quite surprised, Ayato. Did you really think I didn't know what was going on? I've suspected ever since that day when she came here."

He is silent for a few seconds before he answers, "It's true, Mishima and I have been seeing each other for a while."

I can't help but start to cry, I was the one, the woman who would lead him, whom he would look to for direction as he approached his destiny.

I cannot suppress my words, "I, I was supposed to be the only one, but that girl…"

My words must anger him because he says, "Even if you say I can't date, that I can't be with Mishima, I'm not going to do what you want."

I am shocked, this is not the Ayato that I raised, an obedient and dutiful son.

Flabbergasted by his unwillingness to cooperate, I can only say, "Ayato."

"Mishima is the most important person in my life, I love her, and I'm not going to let anything get in our way."

Nonsense, an Ollin isn't to love like that!

Furious, I slap his face and shout, "How could you! This wasn't supposed to happen! You, you weren't supposed to do something like this!"

He steps away from me but then answers, "It did happen, and I'm glad that it has, why are you so angry that I've found happiness?"

Happiness? But it isn't right, our path was laid before us, I was going to guide him to the correct happiness.

I being to cry again and I cover my face as I shake it no.

"My son, my beloved son."

I hear his voice soon afterwards, "And, by the way, I don't have plans with Mishima tomorrow or the day after tomorrow, she's visiting her uncle until the 28th. But I am going to see her after that and I'll be spending New Year's with her."

I hear a door close and move my hands from my face, the tears having stopped. Not back until the 28th? The last day, the day I put my plan into action, to create the barrier protecting Ayato from Narcal. And now I learn that Mishima Haruka will be kept out as well. Reinvigorated by this conclusion, I decide to continue with certitude. He will feel loss, but I will help him, and return him to the true path.