Tuesday

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10:13 A.M. Once again at the now-too-familiar saloon, we see Akuma looking out from the corner of the store, with a very cautious look in his eyes. It's been two days of humiliation in more ways than one, but this time he was going to be careful about the whole ordeal. He wasn't going to be made a fool of today...

Akuma: (to himself) That's right... because the next one who tries to mess around will be six feet under in under six seconds flat.

Akuma's conscience: You know... you could just go to another barbershop and get it done right.

Akuma: No! That defeats the purpose! Well, then... the coast is clear... Time to move.

He then comes out of the shadows of the alleyway and, while trying to look as casual as he could considering his status and looks, made his way to the front door. Little did he know that within the 2 seconds it took for him to walk to the door, everyone within shouting distance stopped what they were doing just to gawk at his hair. Some gave laughs while others just looked on in horror. A certain tall man in particular just closed his eyes and muttered a prayer.

Boman: God help us...

By this time Akuma was inside, instantly seeing who was doing the butchering... er... styling today. Oddly, it didn't take long to recognize the guy (that's right... a guy) who checked in today, mainly since no one else was in the saloon since it was so early. Long blond hair, same height, and the famous million dollar smile. Ken Masters. Rest assured the martial arts demon was a bit startled at this turn of events

Akuma: This must be some type of joke...

Ken: (snapping a hand towel in the air) Alright! First one in line! Welcome to the one and only place where I would actually take time to work at: Saloon Metro. As you probably know, I'm Ken Masters, but you can just call me Ken. You ready for your free shape up?

Akuma: (blinks) Free?

Ken: That's right. Not only are you the first one in today, but I can tell by just looking at you that you're in dire need of a hairstyle chance. I mean, come on... I originated the short hair thing that you seem to have, but it's old-fashioned. Not only that, but you got it all wrong. The whole burnt appearance... shaking head Uh-huh... Not working at all.

Akuma: ...

Ken: Anyways, you should be thanking me. Not everyone would see me actually doing laboring outside of training, and you get to see the best of the best work on that hair of yours, so sit down. Relax. I got you covered.

Akuma: (thinking) ...this won't end well...

Reluctantly sitting down in the chair, Ken wraps the sheet around his neck and starts by observing the 'damage' done

Ken: Mmm... Now I see what your problem is, Akuma... Amateurs, I say! Amateurs!

Akuma: ...so you've heard...

Ken: Don't worry. Those two girls can't possibly know much about style to do the things like what I've heard. You're quickly becoming a casualty in the whole sense.

Akuma: (thinking) Finally. There's someone who actually understands the hassle of a man's battle between him and his hygiene...

Ken: Well, then. I better get started now...

As Ken reached into his inventory to start his job, one stinging question rested on Akuma's mind... Of course he wasn't afraid of asking it

Akuma: Tell me... Since when did you even consider working in a joint like this?

Ken: (while pulling out a bottle and opening it up, pouring some of the contents onto the demon's hair, which slightly stung a bit) Wife...

Akuma: O....k...

Ken: To but it more in an understanding terms, Elisa got tired of me training and teaching my son violence and got me to get something productive. I was like, "Why in the world would I need a job? We're rich as it is." She's like, "I didn't say a job. I have a friend who could use some help for a day. Maybe helping him out would set a better example for Mel than you going off and fighting as much as you do."

Akuma: Ha! Your wife got you good! That's why a true warrior never gets married!

Ken: (rolling eyes) In a way, I can see that... Anyways, I'm almost done with ya...

Akuma: Uh? But I just got here.

Ken: That's the beauty of my personal hair gel. Gets the job done REAL quick. Good for the guy on the go and too busy to wait for some long surgery such the case is for yourself.

Akuma: Precisely...

Ken: Also, it's an absolute chick magnet. Hair so irresistible girls from far and wide will run to be around you.

Akuma: ...o...k...

Ken: Hmph... snaps a towel and strokes it down on Akuma's hair That... should... do it.

Akuma: (instantly looks in the repaired mirror across the wall to see the short hair sulked back stylishly) Mmm... This... doesn't look half bad...

Ken: (thinking) Hmph... So much for gratitude... out loud Well, that's it? You paying or what?

Akuma: Yeah sure... Now, if you'll excuse me... I'll be off to a heated battle.

Ken: ...sure...

Akuma, feeling a little bit better about his appearance, is now exiting the saloon, ready to warp back to Japan when a hand grabs his shoulder

Woman: Mmm... Nice... You really are looking good, you know that?

Akuma: a bit startled ...

Woman: I mean... how can a man work out and have all those muscles and stuff and have such a nice taste in hairstyle? Must be pretty tough.

Akuma: ...yeah... (thinking) Who is this blond sap?

Woman: I don't think I ever introduced myself. My name's Mary. Mary Ryan.

Akuma: What type of name...?

Mary: Anyways, I always thought Terry was a dreamboat, but you! That's something I wouldn't pass up for anything, big fella!

Akuma: (nervously) Eerrrr.... I think I'm going leave now.

Before Mary could even react, Akuma teleports out of the club to a safer area FAR away...

Akuma: If there's one thing a true warrior should not tangle with, it's a relationship with women... Now... where did I warp myself to...? Hmm... A rather small room... Tiles all over... Mirrors... Cabinets of some type... A toilet!?

Athena: AAAAHHHHH!!!!! PERV!!!!!

Akuma spins around to find himself in a very personal area... a bathroom in which Athena Asamiya was ironically taking a nice hot lather bath...

Akuma: (shocked) What the....!?

Athena: (stammering) I... I...

Akuma: (just stares) ...

Athena: Mmmm.... Nice hair...

Akuma: (confused) Uh... thanks...?

Athena: Someone like you has to be pretty tired... Warping around and such... Why don't you relax...?

Akuma: (resumes being shocked) Errr....!

Athena: (running her hand along the water's surface) Come on... I'm pretty sure you wanna jump in with me...

Akuma: And that's my cue to leave... (teleports to another place) My god, what is wrong with the warping today?? It was normal until I left that saloon... Mmm... It couldn't be... Nah... Now, where am I...? Let's see... Forest... That's good... Very good. Waterfall...

?: ANDY!!! I know you here! I can hear you breathing!!!

Akuma: What now??

Out of nowhere another woman jumps from behind and tackles Akuma to the ground, seizing his long hair and pulling it to new extremes

Mai: I got you now, Andy Bogard! Now you're going to stop ignoring me and give me the attention that I crave... Wait a sec... You're not Andy...

Akuma: (while his face is in the grass, sarcastically): Oh... really...? How could you tell...?

Mai jumps of the Master of Fists and just stares at him while he fixes himself. Akuma doesn't know that she's staring until he faces her again.

Akuma: What is your problem, woman?

Mai: Err... N-nothing... It's just that your hair makes you very attractive...

Akuma: Oh, crap. Not again...

Mai: Not as good as Andy, is, though....

Akuma: ...

Mai: But, hey, it's a nice do. Nice enough for me to—

Akuma: BYE!

One more teleport lands Akuma in a strange place...

Akuma: What...? A steel mill...?

Zangief: Ho, ho! Look what ye got here, boys! A wimpy pretty boy in ze gi!

Akuma: (at first thrown off by the sudden realization that he was surrounded by lumberjacks and the Red Cyclone, Zangief, it was safe to say where he was...) At last! Someone who I can use my fist's potential! I haven't murdered anyone all this week so far!

Zangief: What do ye say? Shall ye show ze the works?

Lumberjack #1: Yes...

Lumberjack #2: Hold zim down before he gets away!!

Akuma: Fine! Come and show me your true powers... What the...?

Much to Akuma's surprise, there wasn't any real physical threat being pulled... The lumberjacks... and even Zangief proceeded to strip... and that means totally strip...

Akuma: (thinking) I don't like where this is going!!

Zangief: Steward!! Ze oil, post haste!!

Steward: Got it right here, big boy!

Akuma: (thinking) WAIT A MINUTE!!! THIS IS A GAY MILL!!

Zangief: (with an even more sickening smile than Bison could ever come up with) Now zen... Shall we, cut to ze chase?

Akuma: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

Luckily, his next Ashura Warp lands him back at his hideout in Tokyo, where he instantly dumped his entire head into the river nearby in hopes to wash out Ken's miracle gel. It rested in there for about a minute before he whipped it out, water flying all over the place and his hair messed up and all over his head

Akuma: And good riddance!! So much for that!! Now maybe I can relax...

Dark Sakura: I wouldn't sit down just yet, pal...

Akuma jumped once he heard the dark schoolgirl's voice from behind him and her reflection right behind his, her eyes a devil red like Akuma

Akuma: It's YOU again!

Dark Sakura: Damn straight...

Akuma: What do you want, huh?? I thought we were finished!

Dark Sakura: Well... no... I don't think so... You see... we still got some unfinished business to attend to...

Akuma braced himself to expect an attack, but Dark Sakura just raises one of her eyebrows

Dark Sakura: What do you think you're doing?

Akuma: ...

Dark Sakura: You thought... (light giggling) Oh, come on... You're still not mad about that hair incident, huh?

Akuma: ...

Dark Sakura: I thought you'd be long over that by now...

Akuma: You thought wrong, child...

Dark Sakura: Come on... Is there anything you could want me to do to make it up to you?

Akuma: ...become my disciple...

Dark Sakura: ...I'll... think about that one...

Akuma: That's good enough.

Dark Sakura: Alright... Now, I better get back before it gets too late...

Akuma: I've got a better idea... COME! Watch All My Children with me!

Dark Sakura: (surprised) W-what....? You mean to tell me a mountain man such as yourself has a TV up in this joint...

Akuma just points over to the cave under the waterfall where a 32 inch high definition TV was sitting at complete with a VCR and a DVD player

Dark Sakura: Oh, crap...!

Dark Sakura warps in and sat down on the ground in front of it, where Akuma shortly followed. From then on until the late hours, the two spent it watching the Soap Channel with the occasional shouting at the TV... However, despite all that, there was one thing that set the tone for the next day...

Dark Sakura: (sleepily) By the way... That's some nice hair you got...

Akuma: ...that's it. I'm getting it cut tomorrow.