Chapter Eighteen
Without You

Part One
They had made it back to Besaid safe and sound. A month had passed since their journey, but Rikku was worse off now than she had been before they had gone to Guadosalam. She had too many questions – why had he been so blurry? Why couldn't she see him? And how would he ever know that he was going to be a father in less than five months?

One night, after everyone had gone to sleep, Rikku crept out of the village and went down to the beach. The sea had always calmed her – the air was so soothing and smelled so fresh. And the water – some days the water looked so inviting. She had often wondered how far out she would have to swim before she could be considered lost forever.

Rikku sat down at the water's edge, and watched the way the moonlight made the water sparkle and dance. If she squinted just right, she could almost see his face there in the waves. "Oh, I miss you," she breathed quietly. Then she started to cry.
She stood up and looked at the heavens. "Are you up there? Where is the Farplane exactly? Above us? Below us? All around us?" Then she stamped her foot down. "And who cares? Why aren't you here? You said you'd always be with me, but you're not! You lied!" She was screaming now, and she didn't care. No one was around – and she really needed this.
"Hu syddan fryd, remember? No matter what! Where are you?" She sniffled, and then gasped.

She felt a tiny flutter – almost like butterfly wings – in her abdomen. She put her hand to her slightly rounded stomach and felt it again. The quickening of her baby, the first sign of its life. "Oh," she whispered, tears rolling down her cheeks. "There you are."

Part Two
At that very moment, on the summit of Mt. Gagazet, Auron landed with an unceremonious thud on the snowy slopes. He grumbled to himself a little, but then realized what the bumps and bruises he had just acquired meant. He was alive and he was back on Spira.

The soul-swap had been a strange experience. The unsent soul had been yanked from his body – causing him to experience the last ten years of his "life" in a sort of rewind, the very last thing he saw was his death on Mt. Gagazet. Then all had gone black.

Then, the Keeper of Souls had restored his living soul, and he saw a bright white light, followed by his life – beginning with his birth in Bevelle – run through in quick succession, until once again, he reached the point of his death upon the sacred mountain.

And of course, he had been sent back to the place it had ended. He had to smile a little in spite of it all. His skin felt warm and tingly – he could actually feel the blood rushing through his veins. He could feel the steady and gentle beating of his heart within his chest. And – most amazingly of all – his scars were gone, aside from a few minor battle wounds. He could see clearly out of both eyes now, and his left arm no longer pained him.

He looked and felt as he had before his death at age twenty-five. The only difference was that he had retained all of the memories he had acquired in the past ten years. First and foremost in his mind was finding Rikku.

Scowling to himself, he pondered his options. She could be on the airship with her father and brother, and that meant she could be anywhere. She could have returned to Bikanel to help rebuild home – and that was definitely a long trek from the peak of Mt. Gagazet. In fact, he wasn't even sure how to get to Bikanel. Last time he had gone had been because of Sin.
He thought that maybe Kimahri would know, so he began his journey down the mountainside to find the great blue beast. As he approached the lower parts of the mountain, he was saddened to see how few Ronso remained. Seymour and the Guado had really done a number on their tribe.

He reached the gates of the mountain, and there stood Kimahri. Auron fought the urge to run to his old friend – it would be completely out of character. But he was so thankful to see someone familiar – someone who could lead him to the woman who owned his heart.

Kimahri turned at the sound of the Ronso behind him gasping in disbelief. Kimahri's eyes widened when he saw Sir Auron standing there – without scars, without pain – alive. "Sir Auron!" he called.

"Kimahri," Auron said simply.

"Kimahri not understand. Saw Sir Auron go to Farplane. Why Sir Auron back?"

Auron explained everything to the Ronso, beginning with the dream visit from Braska, and culminating with the soul-swap.

Kimahri nodded. "They send Sir Auron back because Sir Auron good man. Sir Auron help Braska and help Yuna. Yuna be glad to see Sir Auron. Rikku be glad too."

"Rikku. Do you know where she is?" Auron asked, hoping that the Ronso could lead him to her.

Kimahri shook his head. "Yuna will know. We will go to Besaid," he concluded.

Auron nodded. It would be a long trip, but it wouldn't be nearly as long as searching all of Spira for the Al Bhed that he loved. "It's late now," he said logically. "We will depart in the morning." He would have loved to have left right then, but a nighttime journey would be ridiculously slow and unnecessary. Plus, he was exhausted from the events of the past few hours.
Kimahri nodded. "First light, we will go. With just two, it take many months. Kimahri hope we find Rikku in time."

Auron was puzzled by the Ronso's cryptic reply. "In time for what?" he asked his old friend as they headed for the Ronso village.

Kimahri shook his head. He knew where Rikku was, and he knew that Rikku was expecting. But he didn't want to tell Sir Auron, for he wanted Rikku to be able to tell him – it was their news after all. All Kimahri wanted was to bring happiness to everybody.

Part Three
Yuna had heard Rikku leave their hut that night. She knew she had gone down to the beach. Rikku had gone down to the beach nearly every night since they had returned from Guadosalam.

This time, Yuna decided to follow her, and make sure her cousin was all right. When she reached the beach, she saw Rikku standing at the water's edge, tears in her eyes, with her hands on her belly.

Rikku turned at the sound of footsteps behind her. "Oh! Yunie!" she cried.

Yuna, having been caught, walked up to Rikku. "Are you okay?" she asked softly.

Rikku nodded. "Yes. I – I just felt the baby for the first time. I feel so – so calm now." She smiled tentatively at her cousin. "I feel like, I don't know, like everything is going to be okay."

Yuna hugged Rikku. "Everything will be okay! I know it's been hard, Rikku, without him. But you still have him with you, in a way. And you always will."

Rikku nodded. "You're right," she said. "And I'm sorry, Yunie. I've been so wrapped up in my own problems, that I have been completely ignoring the fact that you are going through the pain of losing someone, too."

Yuna smiled sadly. "Every day, I miss him. Every day it gets harder – but it gets easier too. I think – I think you just learn to accept fate. We did nothing wrong. We loved immeasurably. Some people live forever and never get that chance. But we did, so we are the fortunate ones. It just wasn't in the cards for our loves to last forever. But we'll keep the memories. And you'll have a baby, and with that, we will remember the love we were lucky enough to have had."

Rikku put her arm around Yuna, and together, they walked back to the village, both of them feeling peace for the first time in months.

A/N: Yay! He's finally back! Took me forever to get things set up and get to the point that I could bring him back! Oh, but don't worry, there's still lots more chapters to come and all kinds of Aurikku goodness! Just gotta have patience . . . Anyway, hope you like this chappie, sorry it took me so long to post it. My life is chaos right now. lol Review review review and I will love you forever! I should be able to update more often now -- Keeping Fingers Crossed -- So until next chappie, enjoy:) Rhianna :)