Chapter 3
Hello Again

"Ashley wake up!" Mom shouted and walked into my bedroom so not welcomed.

"I don't feel good." I said and moaned. She opened the curtains revealing the bright sun. "I think I'm blind."

"Sweetie, you can't miss another day. It's already Wednesday. Just think of it that way, okay?" Mom said and finally left my room. I tried to kick the blanket off my legs, but it just stayed in the same place. Maybe that's a sign not to go, but I suppose mom is right. I better go to school because I don't want to get behind so I rolled out of bed and sat up. There was the sun shining bright outside my window. I think it's trying to mock me with its happiness.

"What is that smell?" I said. Out of nowhere I see Toby walk to into my room just like mom did.

"It's my new cologne. Do you like?" Toby asked grinning.

"No not really. How much of that stuff did you use?"

"Half the bottle. You can't be too sure about these things? I wanna impress Kendra."

"Well don't be surprised if when you see her she runs into the other direction."

"I'm glad to see that you're in a good mood." He said and left. I'm not in a good mood, not at all. I walk into my bathroom stepping on the cold titled floor. It makes me jump and when I do so there I see the biggest pimple I have ever seen. Maybe my mirror is playing tricks on my mind, but when I take a closer look it's still there.

"I won't hear the end of this one." I said out loud and washed my face with some cold water trying to make myself wake up. Thank goodness for cover-up. I d don't know where I would be without it. I walked over to my stereo and put in a CD because music always puts me into a better mood. I start to sing along with the voice of Gwen Stefani.

You and me

We used to be together

Everyday together always...

I really feel

I'm losing my best friend

I can't believe this could be the end

"Honey, are you coming out any time soon?" My step dad shouted from outside my door.

"Yeah, um I'll just catch the bus okay?" I said while putting gel in my hair. It is getting really long and harder to put up. Maybe I'll get a hair do after school. It will be something to do.

"Are you sure?" He shouted. I thought he already left. I bet he doesn't trust me and thinks I might not end up going. Hmm...that doesn't sound like such a bad idea.

"Yeah I'm sure. Bye." I said and he left.

Don't Speak

I know what you're saying

So please stop explaining

Don't tell me 'cause it hurts

Don't speak

I know what you're thinking

I don't need your reasons

Don't tell me 'cause it hurts

When I'm done getting ready I walked into the kitchen to grab a strawberry pop tart.

"Toby, what are you doing here?" I asked when I saw Toby sitting at the counter.

"Waiting for you. Dad said you were taking the bus, but I guess you forgot."

"I'm always late you know that, but I'm ready now. Come let's go." I said and we went to the bus stop and waited. I guess the bus is also late. Finally it arrived so I got on and took a seat near the back. Oh look who decided to take the bus too, no other than Craig Manning himself. Oh this is going to be a beautiful day. What is he doing? Did he just wave at me and was that a smile?

"Hi Ashley." He said.

"Uh yeah." I said and tried to ignore him. Wow he was speaking to me, but I don't want to speak to him. He's probably doing it out of sympathy and frankly I don't need it. I can take care of my own life and all the problems that are attached to it. At least I think I can. Oh I know what this reminds me of. When I was a little kid about six, my mother used to read me the story 'The Little Engine That Could'. She read that book to me almost every night and after the twentieth time I had it memorized. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...

"Um we're here." Toby yelled and got off the bus quicky probably to go see his girlfriend Kendra..

"Oh yay!" As soon as I got off I saw Ellie sitting on the stoop reading a book. I went up to her and took a seat next to her. She looked at me from behind her book. "Wow, you actually came."

"Yeah, wish I was happy about it. You know who else noticed I was here?"

"Who?"

"Craig, yeah I was surprised myself."

"I guess he still likes you, but who cares." Ellie said.

"Hey Ellie." Sean said.

"Hi Sean." Ellie replied and oh my gosh is she blushing? Did I miss something? How long have I been gone? I better not mention anything or else Ellie might get mad. Sometimes she can be touchy about relationships since the whole Marco coming out thing. I'm not saying that I won't ever mention something, but just not today.

Our memories

They can be inviting

But some are all together

Mighty frightening

As we die both you and

With my head in my hands

I sit and cry

I arrived in homeroom just before the late bell. Yes saved by the bell once again. I decide to take a seat by myself in the back roll, but I guess Paige Michalchuk had different plans. Surprisingly she took the seat right next to me and smiled.

"Hey Ashley it's nice to see you again."

"Uh hi Paige excuse me, but do you want something?" I asked, not knowing anybody missed me, especially not Paige.

"No, not at all. I just wanted to say hi."

"Thanks, what have I missed?"

"Well yesterday Liberty announced that there is going to be a talent show in three weeks. Exciting huh?"

"Yeah it could be fun." I said and tried to smile. A few weeks ago I would've been psyched, but it doesn't sound too exciting right now.

"Hazel, me and a couple of other girls from the Spirit Squad were thinking if joining it." That reminded me of Manny Santos, otherwise known as the life ruiner.

"We'll get all dolled up and who knows we might win." She said and smiled. Yeah they probably would win. Everybody knows that. They just happen to be the most popular girls at Degrassi Community. I can't imagine being so perky all the time running around spreading happiness wherever I go because that isn't how actual people act.

In Computers I sat with Ellie instead of Paige. Oh well can't complain.

"Hey Marco!" I greeted.

"Hi Ash, nice to see you. Where happened?" Marco asked.

"Heartache, depression...shall I continue?"

He replied, "I get the point and that can be tough. Sorry!"

"Thanks but it will get better." I said and worked on the assignment. Mr. Simpson is looking better, bald, but better. The day is going by slow just dragging on. I already have tons of homework to keep me busy tonight, but maybe that is all I need, something to keep my mind off everything else going on in my life.

At lunchtime I was starving so I decided to get a cheeseburger, Pepsi, and a large order of curly fries. Ellie and Marco sat at the table and stared at me.

"Pig out much?" Ellie said while taking some of my fries.

"Why not? It's not I have a boyfriend to impress." I said and sipped my Pepsi.

"Okay it's your body." Marco said and looked at something. Ellie and me turned around to see what he was paying all his attention to. It was no other than Dylan, his crush and his boyfriend. "I got to go guys, but see you later." He said and skipped into Dylan's direction. Ellie watched him with no emotions.

"Ellie are you okay?" I asked.

"I don't know, not really. It's not fair. He should be with me. I try to be happy for him. I really do, but I can't help but wish he was with me." Ellie said and took a drink of her soda.

"Oh I know how you feel...not exactly the same situation but I bet it sucks."

"You're good." She said and giggled.

"I was thinking of getting my hair done after school do you want to come?"

"Sure. There's no reason for me not look good."

"Ashley pass the ball!" Sarah shouted. I was trapped so I took the shot and missed. "Nice job." A girl shouted while others hissed. I don't get it. It's just a stupid basket ball game. I hate PE and don't know why I have to take it. Wait yeah I do. My mother wants me to take it to keep in shape, but I don't know why. I've never had a weight problem, nut somehow here I am counting the minutes until this dreadful class is over. Finally the coach blows her whistle and dismisses us.

Thank God there is only one more class before school is over. I think time has stopped purposely to make me miserable. As I walk down these halls it feels so unreal, as if I'm all alone or not even here.

"Watch out!" A guy shouted and I quickly got out of the way. Were people always so rude?

Don't Speak

I know what you're saying

So please stop explaining

Don't tell me 'cause it hurts

Don't speak

I know what you're thinking

I don't need your reasons

Don't tell me 'cause it hurts

"Hey Ashley come sit with us." Paige said and motioned to an empty seat beside her. Ellie and me honestly don't have enough classes together. I took the seat beside her and Hazel because...can anybody answer that?

Hazel said, "So Ash how are you holding up?"

"I'm okay."

"Oh hun let it out. What happened to you was tragic." Paige said in a dramatic way.

"I feel so much better now. Thanks." I responded so this is why she called me over here to rub it in and tell me how much better she is.

"Paige, don't be so insensitive." Hazel said and smiled at me as if she did me a big favor.

"Sorry! I just can't imagine life without Spinner." Paige said and waved at Spinner who was sitting with Jimmy and Marco.

"Yeah that would be tragic." I said and doodled on my notebook, just some random lyrics: sitting here against my will, sitting here against my will, with an empty stare...

"Um should I take that offensively?" Paige asked lurking closely.

"Oh I was just---no." I said. Hey, it's just a little white lie.

"So Paige can I still come over this weekend?" Hazel asked.

"Yeah we need to practice. Hey Ashley do you wanna come over this Friday? Just the girls!" Paige exclaimed.

"No, I mean I'm busy." I replied.

"Please! It will be so much fun. That is something you need right now. It will keep your mind off Craig."

"I don't think about him."

"Yea, okay, whatever. Come over! I'll see you there."

"But---" Darn that bell. She's already gone.

"And we're off." I said as Ellie and me left school.

"Cool, I'm in no rush to go home." She said looking at the ground as if she's ashamed.

"Me neither."

"Consider yourself lucky."

"I do. Get this Paige invited me over for girl's night out."

"Are you serious? Are you going?"

"I don't think so. One night with the Gossip Queen can't possibly be good for my health." I said and then we continued walking. Soon we came upon the beauty parlor.

"Oh hello Ashley how can I help you today?" Yolanda the hairdresser asked. I'm been coming here for like ever.

"A hair cut and hair coloring. I think I might go a little lighter red." I said.

"Hi I'm Ellie and just a trim." Ellie said kind of shy. This isn't really her scene, but I'm glad she came along. I need a friend right now.

"Then you can go first. It won't take that long." Yolanda replied with a smile. After Ellie got done it was my turn. I took a seat in chair thinking this is all I need. Nothing's wrong with a little pampering to cheer me up. After about a half an hour Yolanda was done with my hair.

"Uh oh..." Yolanda said slowly.

"Uh oh what?"

"Look in the mirror." Oh no this isn't good not good at all. Is that me?

Ellie looked at me and said, "Yikes!"

"My hair it's---it's orange." I screamed. Great I look like carrot top.