Stop Petting Me!!
Chapter 1 - "me - dog - woman - petting"
Summary: My first fanfiction, just something that sprung from a long- standing inside joke. I guess this is pre-OoP and during GoF. Poor Sirius...
It was a hot summer's day. Well, it was a hot May day afternoon. Also, it was a Hogsmeade weekend, so naturally, Harry, Hermione, and Ron were going to go visit Snuffles in his cave. Ron and Harry had "nicked" a bunch of food from the kitchens, and hid them in pocket-filled cloaks they had made. They were wating for Hermione down in the Common Room, trying not to look suspicious when Ron said:
"Where's Hermione? She's not doing the bloody girly thing again is she? Like the Ball? I mean honestly, she needs to get up an hour earlier if she is."
"Yeah. She said she just needed to 'get some things' for the trip. Lets go get her ok?" complained Harry.
The two went to run up the girl's stairs, completely forgetting their last incident just as Hermione can flying down them. She ran smack into them just as the stairs turned to a slide sending them all down and landing with a thud at the bottom in a pile of people, food, and hygene products.
"Oi! What's all this for?!?" demanded Ron.
"Oh, just a few things for Sir-I mean Snuffles. You know, living in a cave can't be that – clean." She answered stiffly. "Lets just go ok?"
The three gathered up their things and ran down the front stairs, just getting the last carriage to Hogsmeade. Once they were there they made the familiar journey up the hill and to the cave, slowed down by Hermione's extra packages. They greeted Buckbeak at the cave mouth, but Sirius was nowhere to be found. Deciding to just wait for him, they were about to sit down when a huge black down came barrelling in, looking very rumpled. A second later there was a very rumpled man.
"What happened to you?!?" Harry questioned.
"Me – dog – woman – petting" Siruis panted as he launched himself on the food they brought.
"Oh Siruis, I uh, I brought some other things as well. You know, soap and stuff." Hermione said timidly.
"Hey, thanks! I'm sure I must smell pretty bad by now" he said almost giggling with delight.
Hermione began unpacking things from her over-sized purse and sorted through them, pulling out a very large looking brush while Sirius was still sifting through the food. Hermione walked over to Sirius slowly, and began attacking his hair with the brush. Sirius leaped off the floor and knocked the brush out of her hand.
"Ahhhhhh!!! What do you think you're doing?? Get it aways from me. Stop touching my hair. STOP PETTING ME!!" Sirius yelled, his voice echoing off the walls.
Hermione jumped away looking shocked, as did Harry and Ron. "But its so matted, so tangled, just let me-"
"No! Nobody – touch – head – always – family – petting" Sirius gasped as he sat down, looking suspiciously at the brush Hermione was wielding like a weapon.
"It's a long story," he said "just keep your hands away from my head..."
A/N Well? I know, it's a weird beginning but bear with me, this needs to be introduced a little at a time. Please R&R, and tell me how I'm doing on my first fic.