In Brightest Day, In Darkest Night

by Gary D. Snyder

Part 8:

Jimmy agonized over the situation. "If I just tell him that he has to give up the greatest thing that ever happened to him because it's killing him, he'd probably never believe me. But if I don't do anything, I'd be responsible for whatever happened to him." Jimmy turned to his faithful companion. "Goddard! Options!"

Goddard flipped open the cover to his video screen, showing the message:

EXPOSE HIS SECRET TO THE WORLD

Jimmy shook his head. "That's no good, Goddard. It would look like I was jealous, just like Cindy and Libby said. And he'd probably keep using his powers anyway. Next."

The next suggestion read:

SEND HIM AN ANONYMOUS MESSAGE

Jimmy sighed. "I'm not some frivolous, 11-year-old blond girl across the street with a crush on someone. Next."

Goddard's final suggestion was:

DISCUSS IT WITH A PARENT OR TEACHER

Jimmy thought it over. "That could work. I could just give the basic facts and keep the names and details a secret. Great suggestion, Goddard. Let's go find Mom."

As luck would have it, however, Jimmy ran into his father first. Hugh Neutron was in the living room polishing one of his prized duck decoys and singing one of his many duck-themed ditties as he worked. Jimmy tried to exit the room but before he could escape Hugh spotted him and called out. "Hey there, Jim-Jam. What do you think? It's a Vermont Mahogany Canvasback."

"It's great, Dad," Jimmy replied listlessly.

Something in Jimmy's tone caused his father to look closely at him. "Is everything all right, Son? I mean, kind of like the man who ate the pillow you seem a little down in the mouth."

"Fine. Well, mostly." Jimmy paused and decided that he might was well ask his father for some guidance. "You see, there's something important that I need to tell someone and…well, I'm not exactly sure how to say it."

At first Hugh looked somewhat confused, but then his face cleared as he thought that he comprehended the situation. He put down the decoy and patted the couch next to him, inviting Jimmy to sit down. Jimmy did so and Hugh cleared his throat. "Well, Son, every parent knows that this day will come, but you're just never really ready when it finally does. We've tried a couple times to discuss this with you, but somehow something or other always came up – invaders from space, or military investigators, or other… delaying…type…thingies." He sighed again and began to pace back and forth in front of Jimmy. "But I suppose this is as good a time as any for… the Talk."

Jimmy sounded confused. "The Talk?"

"No, time doesn't wait for young boys and girls. They grow up and suddenly it's a whole new world for them and with no turning back." Hugh suddenly stopped pacing and faced his son. "I guess the simplest way to explain it is that…girls are like…flowers." He looked hopefully in Jimmy's face. "You know what I mean?"

Jimmy struggled to make the connection. "You only have to think about them on holidays and birthdays?"

"Exactly," his father answered, nodding in relief. Then he caught himself and said, "No, wait! That's not it at all!" He thought furiously for a minute and tried again. "They're like flowers because they look pretty and smell nice and…well, everyone should have one to make their life more…pleasant. Not that they're property, of course. They're more like pets… and they're people too and you have to treat them they way you'd want to be treated. You need to let them know that they're an important part of your life."

"You mean that they're to be admired, respected, and cherished?" Jimmy asked.

Hugh turned the idea over in his mind. "Well, not in so many words, I suppose. But the thing is that the time comes when one special girl catches your attention and you begin to feel…differently."

"I guess I don't understand."

"No, but you will some day. And it will be an amazing thing." Hugh seemed to be reminiscing. "And then the night of your wedding you'll be alone with her and look into her eyes and realize…" His voice began to tremble. "…realize that she's your wife now and…and…" The voice continued to quaver. "…that your mother won't be baking her boysencherry pie for you…" Jimmy's father broke down and began crying. "…ever again!"

Jimmy stood up, flabbergasted. What the heck is this all about? he wondered. He stood there, uncertain what to do, when his mother came into the room.

"Oh, Hugh, could you –" She broke off at the sight of her weeping husband. "James Isaac Neutron, what is going on here? Did you try out another of your inventions on your father without our permission?"

"No, Mom," Jimmy replied.

"No mom!" Hugh wailed, his body wracked by violent sobs. "No more mom!"

Jimmy spread his hands innocently. "I told him that there was someone I needed to say something to but didn't know how, and he started talking about flowers and girls and wedding nights and all of a sudden he just started crying."

A knowing look came over Judy Neutron's face. "Oh. I see. He was giving you the Talk."

"Uh…I'm not sure."

"Did it confuse you and seem to have nothing to do with what you were asking about?"

"Yes." Jimmy was definite about that point. "That's for sure."

"Then it was the Talk." She sighed with relief. "This is certainly a load off my minds. I never really knew how we would ever discuss it with you, because you were always so precocious. But know that that's done, it's done."

Jimmy looked at his father who was still sobbing softly. "What about Dad?"

Jimmy's mother sounded reassuring. "Don't worry about that. Oh, Hugh…I just took a peach pie out of the oven. Would you like some?"

Hugh looked up and wiped his streaming eyes with the heel of his hand. "Does it have…cinnamon?"

"Of course."

Hugh took out his handkerchief and noisily blew his nose. "And…and does it have that criss-crossy crust?"

"Yes, it does. Just the way you like it." Jimmy's mother took his father by the arm and led him away to the kitchen, speaking soothingly. "Like you always said, 'There's no problem too wide or high that it can't be fixed with a slice of pie.'"

"That's true," Jimmy heard his father say as his parents left the room. "Thanks so much for reminding me, Sugar Booger."

Jimmy remained standing in the room just as confused as he had been before. Not knowing what else to do and unwilling to think about what his father had just discussed with him, he elected to turn on the TV set. The Ultra Lord show was in progress and he half-watched it as he considered his best course of action. As he was mulling it over the program was suddenly interrupted by a newsbreak.

"We interrupt our program in progress," the newcaster announced, "to bring you an important newsbreak. Just earlier today in Retroville a deliberate attack by well-known evil scientist Professor Finbar Calamitous was foiled by…" He suddenly looked off-camera and spoke with considerable irritation in his voice. "Is this some kind of joke? A giant robot was defeated by Diane Ladd?" There was some unintelligible mumbling in the background and the newscaster looked down at his copy sheet. "Oh. My mistake." He looked back into the camera and continued, "…foiled by a mysterious hero calling himself Dyno Lad, who exhibited amazing abilities in defeating a giant metal robot."

"Battle suit," muttered Jimmy.

"There is no information on the superhero's true identity or origin, or the reason for his mysterious appearance in our city, but a few minutes ago a call was received at this station from a person claiming to be Dyno Boy. He has stated that he fully intends to use his amazing powers for good and to protect Retroville from any villainy that may befall our fair city." Again the newscaster looked offscreen. "'Villainy that may befall our fair city'?" he asked in a disbelieving tone. Again there was some unintelligible mumbling and the newscaster shook his head. "I'm told that the preceding was a direct quote from the unknown source. In any case, we will bring you further details and any other breaking information as they become available. We now return you to the Ultra Lord show, which, in this reporter's opinion, is far more credible than this story." The screen switched back to the TV show just as the newscaster wadded up his copy sheet and vehemently tossed it off-screen.

Jimmy considered the news he had just heard. Ernest had undoubtedly been the one who had called, and he had made it clear that he intended to continue using his powers. Jimmy knew he no longer had any choice about his course of action. He had to tell Ernest everything before his Dyno Lad powers destroyed him.

End of Part 8.