A/N: Sorry that this chapter is quite late. My schedule's been pretty hectic lately, barely leaving me anytime to write! But, yes… I'll be leaving for Chicago next week and I'll be gone for five weeks. With that time, I'll try to write two to three more chapters whilst reading for summer reading. School gets in the way, even during the summer. Can someone explain that?! Please?! Once again, Hermione is in italics and Ron is in regular.

Disclaimer: Only J.K. Rowling owns these characters, not me, despite how very envious I am.

Chapter Two- The Chamber of Secrets

I didn't get to see Harry or Ron until (a few days before term started) I spotted them in Diagon Alley. I hadn't done too much that summer except homework and visiting some family.

Harry had told me about the house elf that appeared in his room during the break. I was initially shocked because, as you very well know (or should know), house elves usually never leave their masters. However, I think that they should leave and that the possession of house elves should be illegal.

Well, I find them rather useful

You would, wouldn't you?

That's right!

You're impossible!

Thanks!

Argh! You make me want to rip out my hair!

Go ahead, there's enough to spare.

I'm about ready to do you some serious damage!!

Yeah... Okay...

So, anyway, Ron, perhaps you should talk about the Burrow because I wasn't there and I don't care to lie.

'Kay. So, George, Fred, and I rescued Harry from the Dursleys. They had put bars on his window, which was a rather pathetic statement. So, I saved the day by bringing Harry home to the Burrow.

Mum gets angry with my brothers and I because we flew the car to Surrey and back without the Invisibility Booster on. At least we weren't seen.

Oh, the dramatic irony

Very funny. Punishment included teaching Harry how to degnome a garden. Goodness that boy is slow. I don't know how the teachers do it...

Ron!

What? It's true and you know it.

Yeah...

Told ya!

Um... Ron, I agreed with you...

Whatever, Hermy. Tee-hee.Hermione slaps Ron upside the head.

Don't make fun of Grawp!

Fine, fine! So, umm... Harry slow... err... Oh yes! I remember now.

I'd say that you were the slow one.

Don't be a bitch, Hermione.

Watch your tongue with me, boy!

May I please continue?!

Yes...

Thanks. So, we teach Harry how to use Floo Powder, too. It goes terribly because he can't follow simple instructions and speak clearly, so, he ends up in Knockturn Alley. He emerges with Hagrid and Hermione runs towards him. Take it from here, shuga.

What the hell did you just call me?!

Shuga... Sorry... I was listening to 'Hey Ya' by some Muggle rap people. I normally don't like that crap, but this song just gets me going!

Riiiight... Anyway, I run towards Harry and repair his glasses because…they were bothering me--all broken like that. He thanks me as I smile and nod.

We finally arrive in Flourish and Blotts to see the wonderfully charming---

Or so you thought...

--Lockhart. Harry gets to bask in some more glory as Lockhart recognizes him and gets a picture with him for the Daily Prophet and gives him copies of all of his books for free. I wish that I could have been him!

You're weird.

That boosts my self-esteem. So, we part and don't see each other until school starts, literally, because Ron and Harry take the liberty of being complete morons and flying Mr. Weasley's car to Hogwarts because the barrier was closed.

It was scary! That was a long sentence…

I don't blame Professor Snape for being extremely angry with you two boys. I still can't believe that you were seen. How horrible. They were both on the verge of expulsion, but Professor McGonagall saved them by issuing both of them a mere detention.

Whilst they met me outside of the portrait of the Fat Lady, I was appalled and even lectured them.

Just... Shut up...

Oh? Hormonal are we?

Sod off, Granger...

So, anyway, Gilderoy Lockhart is the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. Personally, I thought that he was a great teacher, despite a few faults.

First off, Hermione, he had many faults. Second of all, well, he wasn't a –

Ron! Wait until the END of the story, okay? You tell me to shut up... What about you? His first class was rather interesting. I'll get to that in a moment.

Ron received a Howler to everyone's amusement, but his.

Yeah, that's about right... My mum didn't need to send me a Howler, that's for sure...

I would have done the same thing to my son.

You're too much like my mum...

Well, Herbology was eventful. We got to uproot Mandrakes and re-pot them! Then there was Transfiguration. We were assigned the task of—

No one really cares about the lessons, Hermione. No one honestly cares.

.....Whatever, Ron. Lockhart's class... Interesting as I've mentioned...

Yeah, she outlined each of his lessons in little hearts...

Shut it! No I didn't! Argh! Anyway! He gave us a quiz about himself, just to see if we had read the books. I got full marks! After that, he extracted a cage full of Cornish pixies. He opened the cage, causing complete mayhem... I had to use a Freezing Charm to immobilize the pixies because Lockhart and the class fled the scene as soon as the bell rang. Harry didn't do much of anything and neither did Ron.

Nothing much happened after that except for Malfoy calling me a 'Mudblood' (which I've become immune to by now) and dear Ron defending me by attempting to hex Malfoy with his broken wand, but failing because the spell backfired from his broken wand.

Puking slugs is a nasty business.

Wisdom of the day... Later that night, Ron and Harry had to serve their detentions. Harry had told me that near the end of the session, he began to hear a voice... However, no one else could...

Yeah, and we immediately began to worry about his sanity.

Just about... Harry thought that he was the cleverest little lad when he found out that Filch was a Squib, whilst being saved from getting into trouble by Nearly Headless Nick. He bounds into the common room, telling us that we were invited to Nearly Headless Nick's Death day Party. I was excited because not many living people could say that they have been to one. It was fastenating, actually, but I had to play 'keep away from Moaning Myrtle'... Gosh, she's annoying... But, I felt terrible for Nick... Not being able to join the Headless Hunt and all...

Finally, after we leave the party, Harry hears the voice again... He began to follow it, leaving Ron and I no choice but to follow him. Then we saw it painted on the wall in blood:

THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS HAS BEEN OPENED.

ENEMIES OF THE HEIR, BEWARE.

There was a petrified Mrs. Norris underneath, hanging from a torch. I was completely astonished... Malfoy came to the front of the crowd and said something to the effect of, "Enemies of the Heir, beware! You'll be next, Mudbloods!"

Yeah, it's always either Snape or Malfoy who we are convinced are the bad guys, but it always ends up being You-Know-Who.

So very true... Ron? Can you continue from here for a bit? I have to go and tutor Neville...

Erm... Sure... Where were we? Oh... The Mrs. Norris but... I don't like that cat... I don't like cats, period, really... But, anyway, Filch was angry! He was like, "I'm gonna kill you!" to Harry. Then Dumbledore came and calmed him down. He motioned for us to go into Lockhart's office. Yay! It seemed that we had gotten into trouble again... It's probably because I have red hair, but... Yeah... We found out that Mrs. Norris was not dead, but petrified, like Hermione already stated. Filch was still intent upon blaming Harry for it. Snape gave the impression that he was defending us, but then the greaseball kept questioning us... Utter prat... Then there was an argument who was going to make the potion stuff for the bloody cat... We didn't get in trouble.

For the next few weeks, Hermione and other rather annoying students kept asking different professors if they would tell us about the Chamber of Secrets. Finally, Professor Binns gave in and told us. I'll sum it up: Salazar Slytherin was a prat, so he was intent on only making Hogwarts for purebloods. Well, angry that the other founders didn't agree with him, he threw a hissy fit and built some secret chamber that hides a monster. The end.

Everyone began to believe that Harry was Slytherin's heir. 'Course, we all know otherwise. But, um... One day we saw a bunch of arachnids...

Back.... Arachnids? What?

S-S-Spiders... Well, they were acting curiously and, uh... Hermione, will you continue?

Surely... Well, the 'arachnids' were acting very odd. So, well, we didn't pay much attention to that until later. Myrtle was crying... Boo hoo... Wait...

Uh, Hermione.... Why is Professor McGonagall eyeing our parchment like that? Oh no... It... She... She's coming! Hide the parchment!

Right um... We'll continue this later.... Must not tarnish perfect record... Must not... tarnish... perfect... record...

You've had detention before...

SHUT UP, RON!

To be continued....