He Who Fights With Monsters
By Thalia Drogna
AN: Thanks to everyone who has reviewed the first three chapters.
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The feast had been spectacular to say the least. Trip had never seen anything like the amount of food that the Tien brought out for their guests. Apparently it was all grown in their farms on board the ship, which was a marvel in itself. The seven who had come across in the first shuttlepod had been joined by Phlox, T'Pol, Hoshi and Captain Archer. They were now sat in what their Tien hosts referred to as the Star Chamber, a room which was situated on the back of the Rel Sevanne. It was a completely transparent dome of glass, so it seemed as if those in the room were sitting amongst the stars and the towers of the Rel Sevanne rose majestically around them from the ship's hull.
The Enterprise officers had been joined by the senior council of the Tien. This consisted of five civil officials, Shar Jen, Nils Fen Lon Dulas, the Weapons Master, and Kris Nor Vin Lusen, Exarch which was the Tien term for "first officer" as far as Hoshi was able to understand. The Tien seemed to be reluctant to use their titles though and expected their visitors from Enterprise to call them by their first and second names.
Ten En Ath Jeriad's title was Patriarch which, according to Hoshi, was more equivalent to Leader than Captain but he was ultimately in charge of the Rel Sevanne, however he was unable to join the Enterprise crew for dinner as Shar Jen had stated earlier. Shar Jen explained that Ten En had a busy schedule that left him little time for anything other than work. He regretted not being able to meet with Captain Archer but the demands of the ship came first. Captain Archer understood the ship coming first, it was something he had grown used to while he had been Captain of Enterprise and he sympathised with the Patriarch.
Trip was given special attention by the Tien who served them their meal, having been responsible not only for getting most of the repairs to Lirat completed but also because Shar Jen had told them that he had been ill earlier in the day. Trip was slightly embarrassed by the attention that he was receiving but with Shar Jen sat next to him on one side and T'Pol on the other he was feeling quite happy. They had been discussing aspects of Tien culture and Shar Jen had been interested to hear about the differences between human culture and her own. Shar Jen had a way of putting him at ease and he couldn't remember a time when he'd last been this relaxed. For the first time in a long while he was beginning to enjoy himself.
The Captain had cornered him before the dinner and given him a lecture about messing about with the nanites and alien computer systems, but it hadn't been more than a friend telling another friend to take more care of himself. Trip reassured Archer that he wouldn't do it again and the incident was forgotten. He knew the Captain was just worried about him, the last few months had been pretty hard on their friendship. Trip was under no illusions about what his capture and recovery had put Archer through, it was understandable that he'd be a little overprotective of his Chief Engineer for a while.
The dinner was followed by entertainment as promised. The Tien played instruments and created beautiful music that tore at the emotions. The music sounded like snowflakes colliding but underneath was a hidden tribal beat that eventually took over the song, becoming more urgent and primal as the music continued. Dancers entered the room, wearing brightly coloured garments and swirled around the floor in intricate patterns in time to the music. Shar Jen sat beside him explaining the instruments and some of the theory behind the music, but as the music went on she became quiet and they let it wash over them. Trip hardly noticed when Shar Jen put her hand over his on the table.
T'Pol was more observant. She didn't like the way that this alien woman was behaving towards Commander Tucker, she felt that something was wrong with this ship and the Tien but she couldn't pin down what it was. Vulcans did not get "gut feelings" but that was the closest analogy she could think of to describe her current thoughts. It was disturbing her somewhat that she had such a reaction to what should otherwise have been a routine first contact situation. She would have dismissed it as a side effect of her time spent with humans, except that she suspected it was more than that.
The dancers left the floor and the music became more restful again. The party began to move into small groups to talk further. Shar Jen led Trip towards some comfortable chairs around the edge of the dome where they could look out at the stars and talk more privately.
"Did you enjoy the music, Commander?" asked Shar Jen.
"Trip, call me Trip, and yes, I enjoyed it very much," said Trip.
"I am glad, Trip," said Shar Jen and smiled.
"So you said you'd been out here for ten generations?" said Trip and Shar Jen nodded to let him know he was correct. "I mean what are you doing out here? Why haven't you found a planet and settled down?"
"We originally intended to find a planet to settle upon," said Shar Jen, "but our plans changed. It was no longer practical. I can't tell you more than that."
Trip looked at Shar Jen but decided not to try to elicit more information on something which seemed to be a touchy subject. "What about your homeworld? Don't you want to go back there?"
"We can't go back. Our homeworld was destroyed. We are the last of the Tien. We cannibalised most of the internal planets of our system to build the Rel Sevanne. That gap between those two stars there is all that is left of Tien," said Shar Jen pointing out to the star field in front of them.
"I'm sorry," said Trip, it was inadequate but he had no idea what else to say.
Shar Jen smiled at him. "It was a very long time ago. We survived and built a life for ourselves on the Rel Sevanne. It is the only life that we have ever known. I have seen more and done more on the Rel Sevanne than I ever would have done had we remained on Tien." She paused looking out at the stars. "We have a saying "space is not empty, it is only distance that makes it seem so". Space sent you to me, if we had never left Tien we would never have met." She turned to look at Trip again. "Enough about our past. Let us talk about you instead."
"Me? Well there isn't much to say really," said Trip. Shar Jen reached out and put a hand gently on his cheek.
"I know your life has not been easy recently, Trip. Lieutenant Reed told me you were captured by your enemies," said Shar Jen, a look of sadness in her eyes. "I sensed something was wrong when I saw you standing alone in the docking bay."
"He had no right to tell you about that," said Trip, suddenly on the defensive. Shar Jen dropped her hand and sat upright in her chair.
"The Tien are an empathic race, we are sensitive to our surroundings and each other. I sensed that you were hurting from something terrible that had happened. I asked him why you were in pain and he told me," said Shar Jen. "You couldn't have hidden something this great from me while we were working so closely together."
"I only just met you. I'm not comfortable baring my soul to everyone I meet," said Trip.
"I'm not like everyone. We already have a connection. I know that you have felt something between us. Give me your hand," said Shar Jen.
"Why?" asked Trip.
"It will help you," said Shar Jen. Trip put his hand in Shar Jen's. "Now look at my eyes," she said and Trip looked into the turquoise eyes that seemed to pierce him to his heart. The room faded away around them, there was simply the two of them. "You felt alone, you were afraid that your ship would never come for you," she said.
"Yes," said Trip, his own voice sounding distant.
"You were determined not to betray your ship but you worried that you already had," said Shar Jen. "And...someone else, you weren't just doing it for Enterprise. Your sister. You worried that you would be letting your sister down. You felt despair that you would die without seeing Earth again, without completing your mission."
"Yes," said Trip again, the word little more than a whisper. A single tear ran down his cheek.
"And you felt invaded, they did something to you. When you returned you were ashamed that you hadn't done enough to stop them. You no longer deserved the love and concern of your friends. You felt...numb. I can sense anger at yourself and at your inability to do things, anger because you were scared. Anger because you are still scared that they will come to take you back."
Trip couldn't break away from staring at Shar Jen. How was she doing this? It was more than empathy, it was as if she was reading his mind. It was like a catharsis, he felt her taking some of the weight from him as she spoke about his emotions.
"Let the pain go, it serves no purpose. You are safe now," said Shar Jen. She had rarely ever felt such sadness before, this man was carrying so many terrible, horrible memories.
"I wish I could let it go," replied Trip quietly.
Shar Jen blinked and Trip was suddenly pulled back to the room. "If you were Tien, I could help you more. How do you feel?" asked Shar Jen.
"Like I just poured out my soul," he said blinking and wiping tears from his eyes. "How did you do that?"
"I told you we are an empathic race. I am slightly more than that," said Shar Jen.
"I kind of got that feeling," said Trip. "That's one hell of a talent you have there."
"Emotions are connected to memories and I can sometimes pick up on those memories, especially if they are connected to strong emotions. In some situations I can relieve the stress of bearing those emotions. I wasn't sure if it would work at all with another species but it seems we are similar enough that I can help you to a small degree. If you had been Tien then I might have been able to help you let the pain go completely," said Shar Jen.
"I'm not sure I'd want you to. It's part of being human, it makes us who we are," said Trip.
"It is not the pain, it is the experience that makes us who we are," said Shar Jen.
"Yeah, I know but if it's all the same to you, I'll work through this in my own way," said Trip.
"I understand," said Shar Jen. "I also detected curiosity from you today, would you be interested in seeing our computer?"
"Sure, that would be great," said Trip, smiling at the Tien Artificer. He was wondering what else she had picked up while she was in his head and he hoped he hadn't been too obvious about the fact that he found her attractive. The chances were that Enterprise would be leaving in a couple of days and he'd never see her again after that, nothing could come of this. But, damn, she was beautiful.
"Excuse me for a moment while I make the arrangements," said Shar Jen.
****
Shar Jen found Kris Nor talking with Captain Archer and politely asked for a moment of his time. The two of them left the Star Chamber and went out into the corridor. They talked in hushed tones even though the corridor was empty.
"The Enterprise crew members will be leaving the ship soon," said Kris Nor. "We must act tonight."
"I can't believe that we are even considering taking another being to preserve our own lives. This is not our way," said Shar Jen.
"This is hard on all of us, it goes against what we have been taught, our ethics and values, but we have no choice. You know that the Senior Council have already agreed to this course of action and Ten En will only live for a few more days at most. Shar Jen, you know that without our computer the Rel Sevanne will cease to function, we will be the last generation of Tien. The Rel Sevanne needs an organic component or we will all be dead," said Kris Nor. "Do you want the lives of thousands of Tien on your hands when the sacrifice of one life will save us?"
"If he was Tien it would be different. He doesn't understand. He has been through so much already, he doesn't deserve this," said Shar Jen.
"This is our survival we are talking about," said Kris Nor. "We can't wait any longer. This is the right thing to do."
"If this is the right thing to do then why does it feel so much like betrayal?" asked Shar Jen.
"We must do this for our people, for the Tien, for the Rel Sevanne. It is the only way. You must see that."
"I see it but I don't like it. I'm an Engineer not a kidnapper."
"All you have to do is get him to the computer room we will do the rest," said Kris Nor.
"I understand the plan. I will do what is required of me for the good of my people," said Shar Jen and turned on her heel to return to Commander Tucker. "Do not ask any more of me."
****
Trip gazed out at the stars and was startled when he saw the reflection of T'Pol behind him. "Something I can do for you, Sub-commander?" he asked.
"You seem to be getting on well with the Artificer," said T'Pol. She had watched the two of them together and had been concerned by what she saw. Shar Jen had initiated what T'Pol knew a human would describe as intimate contact with the Commander, touching his cheek and then taking his hand. That however would not have worried her had it not been for the look in the Commander's eyes; they had suddenly been clouded by pain and his features had taken on a distant appearance. She wondered what had transpired between them. She had no reason to think ill of Shar Jen but something was going on.
"Yeah, she is something else. I spent most of this morning with her trying to work out what was up with their engines. Her knowledge of this ship is just amazing. Shame we're leaving soon, I'd liked to have spent more time with her discussing the Tien approach to warp theory," said Trip.
"I trust you will keep your interest in the Artificer confined to her engineering expertise," said T'Pol.
"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Trip, twisting quickly to face T'Pol.
"I was merely suggesting that anything else is not our concern," said T'Pol.
"Yeah, I'm getting your message loud and clear, T'Pol," said Trip. "You seem to be looking a little more green than usual, perhaps you should get Phlox to check that out."
"I assure you, Commander, I am a completely natural colour for a Vulcan," said T'Pol, slightly puzzled by the Commander's reference to her colour.
"Never mind," said Trip, crossly. He had spotted Shar Jen approaching from the other side of the room and decided that now was a good time to finish this conversation before he said something he'd have to apologise for later. "If you'll excuse me, Shar Jen is going to take me for a tour of their computer."
T'Pol watched Commander Tucker as he went to meet the tall Tien Artificer. She felt unsettled. It was late in the evening ship's time and she had yet to meditate, perhaps that was why she was feeling this way. She decided that must be the reason and went to find the Captain.
Lieutenant Reed had also watched the scene from across the room where he was talking to Nils Fen, the Weapons Master. Shar Jen had been completely correct in her assessment that the two of them would get on. He was more interested in where Trip was going with Shar Jen at the moment though, as he watched the two of them exit the room. Damn it, Trip, he thought, you're not supposed to wander off alone, I would have thought that you of all people would remember that.
"Excuse me, Nils Fen, I had better go and keep an eye on Commander Tucker," said Reed.
"I'm sure Shar Jen will look after him," said Nils Fen with a slight smile. "Best to let the two of them have some privacy. I believe she wanted to show him our computer."
Reed shrugged. "I suppose a few moments couldn't hurt," he said. Privately, he was wondering if there wasn't more that she wanted to show Trip.
"So you have been on board Enterprise for three years?" asked Nils Fen. The Tien Weapons Master was slightly taller than Shar Jen but he also had the same white hair that the rest of the Tien had, except his was cut short. He seemed to be older than Shar Jen but Reed couldn't be sure if Tien aged in the same way that humans did.
"Yes," said Reed. "I know it's nothing compared to your ten generations."
"Ten generations by necessity rather than desire. I gather your race is new to space faring but three years is long enough gain a lot of knowledge. After all, I understand from Shar Jen that your Chief Engineer has been of great help with sorting out the problems with Lirat," said Nils Fen.
"Commander Tucker is the best Engineer in the fleet," said Reed. "Although don't tell him I said so, his head is quite large enough."
Nils Fen laughed. "And a friend of yours?" he asked.
"Yes, a good friend too," said Reed. He guessed Nils Fen had detected his feelings of concern and friendship for Trip. "It must be a useful attribute for a Weapons Master, being empathic."
"Sometimes it is, but only when dealing with people. My ability is limited by distance, like most Tien so of little use when we are being attacked by another ship," said Nils Fen. Reed filed that piece of information away for future reference. "Not all of us are as sensitive as Shar Jen."
"Have you often been attacked? I would have thought a ship this size would have deterred most attackers," said Reed.
"We have our enemies," said Nils Fen. "The Expanse has slowed us considerably with the anomalies that we keep encountering and we came across some pirates who thought they would have a go at us while we fixed our ship's damage. Luckily I was able to repair enough of the weapons systems to fight them off without any further damage being caused us."
"Yes, we had a similar encounter with some marauders who thought we'd be easy prey. They stole some of our supplies. I don't think they expected us to come after them and get the supplies back," said Reed, a small smile forming on his lips.
"A good Weapons Master is always prepared for the unexpected," said Nils Fen.
"That's what I keep telling my Captain but I usually just get accused of being paranoid," said Reed.
"I understand completely," said Nils Fen in a sympathetic tone. Somehow Nils Fen doubted that Reed would be able to be prepared for what he had planned this time though.
****
Shar Jen led Trip through the corridors towards the heart of the ship, the computer. The room that they entered was lined with banks of computers and in the centre was a cylinder which was currently covered by a smooth, hard, black shell.
"This is amazing," he said. Enterprise's computer was considerably larger and from what Shar Jen had told him, considerably less powerful. "Everything is controlled from this room?"
"Yes," said Shar Jen. "Water, light, heat, engines, weapons. Everything." She moved closer to him and reached out, her finger tips brushing against his cheek. Trip looked at the Artificer and smiled at the contact.
"You said you were having computer trouble. Is it anything we can help with?" asked Trip.
"One of the components is getting very old," said Shar Jen. "It needs to be replaced, but we don't have replacement."
"Oh? Which part is it? Maybe Enterprise could spare something." said Trip, looking around in fascination at the alien technology.
"I'm sure Enterprise can help us. Let me show you the heart of our computer," she said and led Trip to the cylinder in the centre of the room and pulled open the black covering. Inside the cylinder was one of the Tien, surrounded by electronics so that only his face and upper half of his body were visible. He lay at a forty five degree angle to the floor, his body was supported by a cradle of black material. He seemed to be asleep or dead, Trip couldn't tell which.
"I don't understand," said Trip. "I thought you said this was the heart of the computer?"
"He is," said Shar Jen, looking at the Tien who was lying peacefully in the cylinder. "This is our Patriarch, Ten En Ath Jeriad. You can see why he was unable to attend the feast and meet your Captain."
"You're telling me that your Patriarch is part of the computer that controls this ship? This is just unbelievable. You lied to us," said Trip accusingly, moving away from Shar Jen. She reached out to him but he brushed off her hand.
"No, we just didn't tell you the whole truth," said Shar Jen. "Ten En is the central processor of our computer. He is vital to the running of the ship, it could not function without him. He also makes the majority of command decisions with help from the computer and the senior council. The only way our ancestors could find to build a computer this sophisticated was to incorporate a Tien into the matrix."
"But how is he able to interface with the computer?" asked Trip.
"Our ancestors genetically engineered a line of Tien so that they could interface with the computers on the ship. Ten En is the last of that line and he is dying, there are no more Tien to replace him and we have lost the knowledge to genetically engineer more. When Ten En dies the ship will die with him," said Shar Jen.
"Are you asking for our help?" said Trip. "Maybe Phlox could take a look at him..." Shar Jen shook her head and Trip fell silent.
"He is beyond the help of even our doctors and our medicine is more advanced than yours," said Shar Jen.
"Then why are you telling me this if you don't want our help?" asked Trip.
"The Tien wish to extend an invitation to you, Trip," said Shar Jen. "We want you to stay with us. We want you to take Ten En's place."
"You want me to become part of your computer?" asked Trip, he couldn't quite believe what was happening.
"Yes," said Shar Jen.
"No, no way am I becoming part of some machine," said Trip backing away from Shar Jen and the cylinder containing the Patriarch.
"Trip, please just listen to what I have to say. The survival of the Tien is dependant upon you," said Shar Jen.
"Why me? Why am I more compatible than any other human or Tien for that matter?" asked Trip, trying desperately to understand the situation that he found himself in.
"When you tried to access our computer Ten En detected the presence of nano- technology in your body. They should facilitate your ability to interface with our computer," said Shar Jen.
"I seem to remember last time I tried to interface with your computers I got my brain fried, what makes you think that won't happen again?" he asked.
"The reason you were hurt was because Ten En detected your presence and sent you a warning to leave. We didn't quite expect it to have the effect that it did, but it was not a function of the technology," said Shar Jen. "Trip, I am offering you a great opportunity, to save an entire race."
"You're asking me to give up everything that makes me human. Would I even be aware of anything?" said Trip.
"Ten En feels everything that goes on in the ship through the sensors. The Rel Sevanne itself is empathic, it feels the emotions of all the Tien aboard and it touches us." Shar Jen looked directly at Trip, "I have felt your emotions, Trip. I know how alone you have felt since your return, even when you are with your friends you feel set apart by what you went through. You would never be alone again. We would take care of you," said Shar Jen. "You would be a part of us."
"You're asking me to abandon my duties on Enterprise, to leave my friends and my life behind. Enterprise needs its Chief Engineer to complete its mission and I can't leave them," said Trip. "There must be another way."
"No, the computer needs an organic component to function. If the Rel Sevanne dies then the Tien die with it. We are the last of our race and you are our final and only option," said Shar Jen.
"I'm sorry, Shar Jen, but the answer is no. We'll help you with the problem in any way that we can, but I can't stay," said Trip.
"I'm sorry too, Trip," said Shar Jen sadly, "but I must protect my people and I have my orders." She closed her eyes and looked away from Trip. He turned to look at Ten En and Trip was surprised to see the lifeless body of the Patriarch open its eyes. Guards appeared around the room from nowhere and Trip found that he was surrounded. It only took him seconds to realise that he wasn't going to be given a choice about whether he wanted to stay on the Rel Sevanne.
"Shar Jen, don't do this," said Trip as he backed away. She opened her eyes but wouldn't look at Trip. He looked for another exit but the only way out was the door through which he and Shar Jen had entered. That exit was now blocked by one of the Tien guards who carried some kind of weapon.
"Please don't make this any harder than it already is," said Shar Jen.
"This won't work, Enterprise won't leave without me. They need their Chief Engineer. Shar Jen, you know there has to be another way," said Trip. He felt the wall against his back and knew that he was trapped. He only had one course of action left open to him so he decided to take it. Talking his way out of this wasn't working. He hit the guard who was nearest to him and made a grab for their weapon. Although the Tien looked fragile they made up for it with strength and agility, the guard dodged his grab at the weapon and another of the Tien landed a blow on Trip's back which sent him sprawling to the floor. He was too stunned to do more than struggle weakly as the guards pulled him to his feet.
"Shar Jen, you can stop this!" shouted Trip urgently. "You know this isn't right." The guards dragged him away to a side room as he did his best to wrestle himself from their grasp. It was futile though, three Tien were more than a match for a single human. "For an empathic race, you're pretty insensitive to other people's feelings," said Trip bitingly, "let me go, you bastards!"
Shar Jen remained silent. She watched as they took the struggling Engineer into a side chamber and strapped him onto the biobed that awaited him there. She closed the door behind them which blocked out Trip's calls to her to do something. There was nothing for her to do. Ten En was dying and Trip had been sent to them as his replacement. He might not realise it, but he would be better off with them than in the world of raw emotions and hurt which he currently existed in.
"It is done, Patriarch," said Shar Jen.
"Good," said the disembodied voice of Ten En. "See that he is prepared for conjoining and we will begin my removal as soon as he is ready."
"I will see to it," said Shar Jen. She stood for a few minutes trying to feel the emotions of the Patriarch but they were faint and waning. They had found Trip just in time.
Ten En's eyes were shut again. She drew the black covering back over the cylinder, Ten En deserved his peace, he had served the Tien well for his entire life.
"Excuse me, Shar Jen," said a voice behind her. "But I was wondering if you had seen Commander Tucker?"
She turned to see Lieutenant Reed. "I'm sorry Lieutenant, he is not here."
"I thought you were taking him for a tour of the computer?" he said.
"Yes, he left a moment ago," said Shar Jen, "you have only just missed him." The Tien were not good liars, their empathic faculty had meant that it was almost impossible for another Tien not to know when they were being lied to. However, they had become experts at telling half truths and omitting important information.
"Oh, I'm sorry to have bothered you," said Reed and left Shar Jen to her thoughts once again. She could already feel the concern for his friend radiating from the human and she felt her own guilt at what she had done. She was very glad that the humans were not an empathic race.
By Thalia Drogna
AN: Thanks to everyone who has reviewed the first three chapters.
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The feast had been spectacular to say the least. Trip had never seen anything like the amount of food that the Tien brought out for their guests. Apparently it was all grown in their farms on board the ship, which was a marvel in itself. The seven who had come across in the first shuttlepod had been joined by Phlox, T'Pol, Hoshi and Captain Archer. They were now sat in what their Tien hosts referred to as the Star Chamber, a room which was situated on the back of the Rel Sevanne. It was a completely transparent dome of glass, so it seemed as if those in the room were sitting amongst the stars and the towers of the Rel Sevanne rose majestically around them from the ship's hull.
The Enterprise officers had been joined by the senior council of the Tien. This consisted of five civil officials, Shar Jen, Nils Fen Lon Dulas, the Weapons Master, and Kris Nor Vin Lusen, Exarch which was the Tien term for "first officer" as far as Hoshi was able to understand. The Tien seemed to be reluctant to use their titles though and expected their visitors from Enterprise to call them by their first and second names.
Ten En Ath Jeriad's title was Patriarch which, according to Hoshi, was more equivalent to Leader than Captain but he was ultimately in charge of the Rel Sevanne, however he was unable to join the Enterprise crew for dinner as Shar Jen had stated earlier. Shar Jen explained that Ten En had a busy schedule that left him little time for anything other than work. He regretted not being able to meet with Captain Archer but the demands of the ship came first. Captain Archer understood the ship coming first, it was something he had grown used to while he had been Captain of Enterprise and he sympathised with the Patriarch.
Trip was given special attention by the Tien who served them their meal, having been responsible not only for getting most of the repairs to Lirat completed but also because Shar Jen had told them that he had been ill earlier in the day. Trip was slightly embarrassed by the attention that he was receiving but with Shar Jen sat next to him on one side and T'Pol on the other he was feeling quite happy. They had been discussing aspects of Tien culture and Shar Jen had been interested to hear about the differences between human culture and her own. Shar Jen had a way of putting him at ease and he couldn't remember a time when he'd last been this relaxed. For the first time in a long while he was beginning to enjoy himself.
The Captain had cornered him before the dinner and given him a lecture about messing about with the nanites and alien computer systems, but it hadn't been more than a friend telling another friend to take more care of himself. Trip reassured Archer that he wouldn't do it again and the incident was forgotten. He knew the Captain was just worried about him, the last few months had been pretty hard on their friendship. Trip was under no illusions about what his capture and recovery had put Archer through, it was understandable that he'd be a little overprotective of his Chief Engineer for a while.
The dinner was followed by entertainment as promised. The Tien played instruments and created beautiful music that tore at the emotions. The music sounded like snowflakes colliding but underneath was a hidden tribal beat that eventually took over the song, becoming more urgent and primal as the music continued. Dancers entered the room, wearing brightly coloured garments and swirled around the floor in intricate patterns in time to the music. Shar Jen sat beside him explaining the instruments and some of the theory behind the music, but as the music went on she became quiet and they let it wash over them. Trip hardly noticed when Shar Jen put her hand over his on the table.
T'Pol was more observant. She didn't like the way that this alien woman was behaving towards Commander Tucker, she felt that something was wrong with this ship and the Tien but she couldn't pin down what it was. Vulcans did not get "gut feelings" but that was the closest analogy she could think of to describe her current thoughts. It was disturbing her somewhat that she had such a reaction to what should otherwise have been a routine first contact situation. She would have dismissed it as a side effect of her time spent with humans, except that she suspected it was more than that.
The dancers left the floor and the music became more restful again. The party began to move into small groups to talk further. Shar Jen led Trip towards some comfortable chairs around the edge of the dome where they could look out at the stars and talk more privately.
"Did you enjoy the music, Commander?" asked Shar Jen.
"Trip, call me Trip, and yes, I enjoyed it very much," said Trip.
"I am glad, Trip," said Shar Jen and smiled.
"So you said you'd been out here for ten generations?" said Trip and Shar Jen nodded to let him know he was correct. "I mean what are you doing out here? Why haven't you found a planet and settled down?"
"We originally intended to find a planet to settle upon," said Shar Jen, "but our plans changed. It was no longer practical. I can't tell you more than that."
Trip looked at Shar Jen but decided not to try to elicit more information on something which seemed to be a touchy subject. "What about your homeworld? Don't you want to go back there?"
"We can't go back. Our homeworld was destroyed. We are the last of the Tien. We cannibalised most of the internal planets of our system to build the Rel Sevanne. That gap between those two stars there is all that is left of Tien," said Shar Jen pointing out to the star field in front of them.
"I'm sorry," said Trip, it was inadequate but he had no idea what else to say.
Shar Jen smiled at him. "It was a very long time ago. We survived and built a life for ourselves on the Rel Sevanne. It is the only life that we have ever known. I have seen more and done more on the Rel Sevanne than I ever would have done had we remained on Tien." She paused looking out at the stars. "We have a saying "space is not empty, it is only distance that makes it seem so". Space sent you to me, if we had never left Tien we would never have met." She turned to look at Trip again. "Enough about our past. Let us talk about you instead."
"Me? Well there isn't much to say really," said Trip. Shar Jen reached out and put a hand gently on his cheek.
"I know your life has not been easy recently, Trip. Lieutenant Reed told me you were captured by your enemies," said Shar Jen, a look of sadness in her eyes. "I sensed something was wrong when I saw you standing alone in the docking bay."
"He had no right to tell you about that," said Trip, suddenly on the defensive. Shar Jen dropped her hand and sat upright in her chair.
"The Tien are an empathic race, we are sensitive to our surroundings and each other. I sensed that you were hurting from something terrible that had happened. I asked him why you were in pain and he told me," said Shar Jen. "You couldn't have hidden something this great from me while we were working so closely together."
"I only just met you. I'm not comfortable baring my soul to everyone I meet," said Trip.
"I'm not like everyone. We already have a connection. I know that you have felt something between us. Give me your hand," said Shar Jen.
"Why?" asked Trip.
"It will help you," said Shar Jen. Trip put his hand in Shar Jen's. "Now look at my eyes," she said and Trip looked into the turquoise eyes that seemed to pierce him to his heart. The room faded away around them, there was simply the two of them. "You felt alone, you were afraid that your ship would never come for you," she said.
"Yes," said Trip, his own voice sounding distant.
"You were determined not to betray your ship but you worried that you already had," said Shar Jen. "And...someone else, you weren't just doing it for Enterprise. Your sister. You worried that you would be letting your sister down. You felt despair that you would die without seeing Earth again, without completing your mission."
"Yes," said Trip again, the word little more than a whisper. A single tear ran down his cheek.
"And you felt invaded, they did something to you. When you returned you were ashamed that you hadn't done enough to stop them. You no longer deserved the love and concern of your friends. You felt...numb. I can sense anger at yourself and at your inability to do things, anger because you were scared. Anger because you are still scared that they will come to take you back."
Trip couldn't break away from staring at Shar Jen. How was she doing this? It was more than empathy, it was as if she was reading his mind. It was like a catharsis, he felt her taking some of the weight from him as she spoke about his emotions.
"Let the pain go, it serves no purpose. You are safe now," said Shar Jen. She had rarely ever felt such sadness before, this man was carrying so many terrible, horrible memories.
"I wish I could let it go," replied Trip quietly.
Shar Jen blinked and Trip was suddenly pulled back to the room. "If you were Tien, I could help you more. How do you feel?" asked Shar Jen.
"Like I just poured out my soul," he said blinking and wiping tears from his eyes. "How did you do that?"
"I told you we are an empathic race. I am slightly more than that," said Shar Jen.
"I kind of got that feeling," said Trip. "That's one hell of a talent you have there."
"Emotions are connected to memories and I can sometimes pick up on those memories, especially if they are connected to strong emotions. In some situations I can relieve the stress of bearing those emotions. I wasn't sure if it would work at all with another species but it seems we are similar enough that I can help you to a small degree. If you had been Tien then I might have been able to help you let the pain go completely," said Shar Jen.
"I'm not sure I'd want you to. It's part of being human, it makes us who we are," said Trip.
"It is not the pain, it is the experience that makes us who we are," said Shar Jen.
"Yeah, I know but if it's all the same to you, I'll work through this in my own way," said Trip.
"I understand," said Shar Jen. "I also detected curiosity from you today, would you be interested in seeing our computer?"
"Sure, that would be great," said Trip, smiling at the Tien Artificer. He was wondering what else she had picked up while she was in his head and he hoped he hadn't been too obvious about the fact that he found her attractive. The chances were that Enterprise would be leaving in a couple of days and he'd never see her again after that, nothing could come of this. But, damn, she was beautiful.
"Excuse me for a moment while I make the arrangements," said Shar Jen.
****
Shar Jen found Kris Nor talking with Captain Archer and politely asked for a moment of his time. The two of them left the Star Chamber and went out into the corridor. They talked in hushed tones even though the corridor was empty.
"The Enterprise crew members will be leaving the ship soon," said Kris Nor. "We must act tonight."
"I can't believe that we are even considering taking another being to preserve our own lives. This is not our way," said Shar Jen.
"This is hard on all of us, it goes against what we have been taught, our ethics and values, but we have no choice. You know that the Senior Council have already agreed to this course of action and Ten En will only live for a few more days at most. Shar Jen, you know that without our computer the Rel Sevanne will cease to function, we will be the last generation of Tien. The Rel Sevanne needs an organic component or we will all be dead," said Kris Nor. "Do you want the lives of thousands of Tien on your hands when the sacrifice of one life will save us?"
"If he was Tien it would be different. He doesn't understand. He has been through so much already, he doesn't deserve this," said Shar Jen.
"This is our survival we are talking about," said Kris Nor. "We can't wait any longer. This is the right thing to do."
"If this is the right thing to do then why does it feel so much like betrayal?" asked Shar Jen.
"We must do this for our people, for the Tien, for the Rel Sevanne. It is the only way. You must see that."
"I see it but I don't like it. I'm an Engineer not a kidnapper."
"All you have to do is get him to the computer room we will do the rest," said Kris Nor.
"I understand the plan. I will do what is required of me for the good of my people," said Shar Jen and turned on her heel to return to Commander Tucker. "Do not ask any more of me."
****
Trip gazed out at the stars and was startled when he saw the reflection of T'Pol behind him. "Something I can do for you, Sub-commander?" he asked.
"You seem to be getting on well with the Artificer," said T'Pol. She had watched the two of them together and had been concerned by what she saw. Shar Jen had initiated what T'Pol knew a human would describe as intimate contact with the Commander, touching his cheek and then taking his hand. That however would not have worried her had it not been for the look in the Commander's eyes; they had suddenly been clouded by pain and his features had taken on a distant appearance. She wondered what had transpired between them. She had no reason to think ill of Shar Jen but something was going on.
"Yeah, she is something else. I spent most of this morning with her trying to work out what was up with their engines. Her knowledge of this ship is just amazing. Shame we're leaving soon, I'd liked to have spent more time with her discussing the Tien approach to warp theory," said Trip.
"I trust you will keep your interest in the Artificer confined to her engineering expertise," said T'Pol.
"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Trip, twisting quickly to face T'Pol.
"I was merely suggesting that anything else is not our concern," said T'Pol.
"Yeah, I'm getting your message loud and clear, T'Pol," said Trip. "You seem to be looking a little more green than usual, perhaps you should get Phlox to check that out."
"I assure you, Commander, I am a completely natural colour for a Vulcan," said T'Pol, slightly puzzled by the Commander's reference to her colour.
"Never mind," said Trip, crossly. He had spotted Shar Jen approaching from the other side of the room and decided that now was a good time to finish this conversation before he said something he'd have to apologise for later. "If you'll excuse me, Shar Jen is going to take me for a tour of their computer."
T'Pol watched Commander Tucker as he went to meet the tall Tien Artificer. She felt unsettled. It was late in the evening ship's time and she had yet to meditate, perhaps that was why she was feeling this way. She decided that must be the reason and went to find the Captain.
Lieutenant Reed had also watched the scene from across the room where he was talking to Nils Fen, the Weapons Master. Shar Jen had been completely correct in her assessment that the two of them would get on. He was more interested in where Trip was going with Shar Jen at the moment though, as he watched the two of them exit the room. Damn it, Trip, he thought, you're not supposed to wander off alone, I would have thought that you of all people would remember that.
"Excuse me, Nils Fen, I had better go and keep an eye on Commander Tucker," said Reed.
"I'm sure Shar Jen will look after him," said Nils Fen with a slight smile. "Best to let the two of them have some privacy. I believe she wanted to show him our computer."
Reed shrugged. "I suppose a few moments couldn't hurt," he said. Privately, he was wondering if there wasn't more that she wanted to show Trip.
"So you have been on board Enterprise for three years?" asked Nils Fen. The Tien Weapons Master was slightly taller than Shar Jen but he also had the same white hair that the rest of the Tien had, except his was cut short. He seemed to be older than Shar Jen but Reed couldn't be sure if Tien aged in the same way that humans did.
"Yes," said Reed. "I know it's nothing compared to your ten generations."
"Ten generations by necessity rather than desire. I gather your race is new to space faring but three years is long enough gain a lot of knowledge. After all, I understand from Shar Jen that your Chief Engineer has been of great help with sorting out the problems with Lirat," said Nils Fen.
"Commander Tucker is the best Engineer in the fleet," said Reed. "Although don't tell him I said so, his head is quite large enough."
Nils Fen laughed. "And a friend of yours?" he asked.
"Yes, a good friend too," said Reed. He guessed Nils Fen had detected his feelings of concern and friendship for Trip. "It must be a useful attribute for a Weapons Master, being empathic."
"Sometimes it is, but only when dealing with people. My ability is limited by distance, like most Tien so of little use when we are being attacked by another ship," said Nils Fen. Reed filed that piece of information away for future reference. "Not all of us are as sensitive as Shar Jen."
"Have you often been attacked? I would have thought a ship this size would have deterred most attackers," said Reed.
"We have our enemies," said Nils Fen. "The Expanse has slowed us considerably with the anomalies that we keep encountering and we came across some pirates who thought they would have a go at us while we fixed our ship's damage. Luckily I was able to repair enough of the weapons systems to fight them off without any further damage being caused us."
"Yes, we had a similar encounter with some marauders who thought we'd be easy prey. They stole some of our supplies. I don't think they expected us to come after them and get the supplies back," said Reed, a small smile forming on his lips.
"A good Weapons Master is always prepared for the unexpected," said Nils Fen.
"That's what I keep telling my Captain but I usually just get accused of being paranoid," said Reed.
"I understand completely," said Nils Fen in a sympathetic tone. Somehow Nils Fen doubted that Reed would be able to be prepared for what he had planned this time though.
****
Shar Jen led Trip through the corridors towards the heart of the ship, the computer. The room that they entered was lined with banks of computers and in the centre was a cylinder which was currently covered by a smooth, hard, black shell.
"This is amazing," he said. Enterprise's computer was considerably larger and from what Shar Jen had told him, considerably less powerful. "Everything is controlled from this room?"
"Yes," said Shar Jen. "Water, light, heat, engines, weapons. Everything." She moved closer to him and reached out, her finger tips brushing against his cheek. Trip looked at the Artificer and smiled at the contact.
"You said you were having computer trouble. Is it anything we can help with?" asked Trip.
"One of the components is getting very old," said Shar Jen. "It needs to be replaced, but we don't have replacement."
"Oh? Which part is it? Maybe Enterprise could spare something." said Trip, looking around in fascination at the alien technology.
"I'm sure Enterprise can help us. Let me show you the heart of our computer," she said and led Trip to the cylinder in the centre of the room and pulled open the black covering. Inside the cylinder was one of the Tien, surrounded by electronics so that only his face and upper half of his body were visible. He lay at a forty five degree angle to the floor, his body was supported by a cradle of black material. He seemed to be asleep or dead, Trip couldn't tell which.
"I don't understand," said Trip. "I thought you said this was the heart of the computer?"
"He is," said Shar Jen, looking at the Tien who was lying peacefully in the cylinder. "This is our Patriarch, Ten En Ath Jeriad. You can see why he was unable to attend the feast and meet your Captain."
"You're telling me that your Patriarch is part of the computer that controls this ship? This is just unbelievable. You lied to us," said Trip accusingly, moving away from Shar Jen. She reached out to him but he brushed off her hand.
"No, we just didn't tell you the whole truth," said Shar Jen. "Ten En is the central processor of our computer. He is vital to the running of the ship, it could not function without him. He also makes the majority of command decisions with help from the computer and the senior council. The only way our ancestors could find to build a computer this sophisticated was to incorporate a Tien into the matrix."
"But how is he able to interface with the computer?" asked Trip.
"Our ancestors genetically engineered a line of Tien so that they could interface with the computers on the ship. Ten En is the last of that line and he is dying, there are no more Tien to replace him and we have lost the knowledge to genetically engineer more. When Ten En dies the ship will die with him," said Shar Jen.
"Are you asking for our help?" said Trip. "Maybe Phlox could take a look at him..." Shar Jen shook her head and Trip fell silent.
"He is beyond the help of even our doctors and our medicine is more advanced than yours," said Shar Jen.
"Then why are you telling me this if you don't want our help?" asked Trip.
"The Tien wish to extend an invitation to you, Trip," said Shar Jen. "We want you to stay with us. We want you to take Ten En's place."
"You want me to become part of your computer?" asked Trip, he couldn't quite believe what was happening.
"Yes," said Shar Jen.
"No, no way am I becoming part of some machine," said Trip backing away from Shar Jen and the cylinder containing the Patriarch.
"Trip, please just listen to what I have to say. The survival of the Tien is dependant upon you," said Shar Jen.
"Why me? Why am I more compatible than any other human or Tien for that matter?" asked Trip, trying desperately to understand the situation that he found himself in.
"When you tried to access our computer Ten En detected the presence of nano- technology in your body. They should facilitate your ability to interface with our computer," said Shar Jen.
"I seem to remember last time I tried to interface with your computers I got my brain fried, what makes you think that won't happen again?" he asked.
"The reason you were hurt was because Ten En detected your presence and sent you a warning to leave. We didn't quite expect it to have the effect that it did, but it was not a function of the technology," said Shar Jen. "Trip, I am offering you a great opportunity, to save an entire race."
"You're asking me to give up everything that makes me human. Would I even be aware of anything?" said Trip.
"Ten En feels everything that goes on in the ship through the sensors. The Rel Sevanne itself is empathic, it feels the emotions of all the Tien aboard and it touches us." Shar Jen looked directly at Trip, "I have felt your emotions, Trip. I know how alone you have felt since your return, even when you are with your friends you feel set apart by what you went through. You would never be alone again. We would take care of you," said Shar Jen. "You would be a part of us."
"You're asking me to abandon my duties on Enterprise, to leave my friends and my life behind. Enterprise needs its Chief Engineer to complete its mission and I can't leave them," said Trip. "There must be another way."
"No, the computer needs an organic component to function. If the Rel Sevanne dies then the Tien die with it. We are the last of our race and you are our final and only option," said Shar Jen.
"I'm sorry, Shar Jen, but the answer is no. We'll help you with the problem in any way that we can, but I can't stay," said Trip.
"I'm sorry too, Trip," said Shar Jen sadly, "but I must protect my people and I have my orders." She closed her eyes and looked away from Trip. He turned to look at Ten En and Trip was surprised to see the lifeless body of the Patriarch open its eyes. Guards appeared around the room from nowhere and Trip found that he was surrounded. It only took him seconds to realise that he wasn't going to be given a choice about whether he wanted to stay on the Rel Sevanne.
"Shar Jen, don't do this," said Trip as he backed away. She opened her eyes but wouldn't look at Trip. He looked for another exit but the only way out was the door through which he and Shar Jen had entered. That exit was now blocked by one of the Tien guards who carried some kind of weapon.
"Please don't make this any harder than it already is," said Shar Jen.
"This won't work, Enterprise won't leave without me. They need their Chief Engineer. Shar Jen, you know there has to be another way," said Trip. He felt the wall against his back and knew that he was trapped. He only had one course of action left open to him so he decided to take it. Talking his way out of this wasn't working. He hit the guard who was nearest to him and made a grab for their weapon. Although the Tien looked fragile they made up for it with strength and agility, the guard dodged his grab at the weapon and another of the Tien landed a blow on Trip's back which sent him sprawling to the floor. He was too stunned to do more than struggle weakly as the guards pulled him to his feet.
"Shar Jen, you can stop this!" shouted Trip urgently. "You know this isn't right." The guards dragged him away to a side room as he did his best to wrestle himself from their grasp. It was futile though, three Tien were more than a match for a single human. "For an empathic race, you're pretty insensitive to other people's feelings," said Trip bitingly, "let me go, you bastards!"
Shar Jen remained silent. She watched as they took the struggling Engineer into a side chamber and strapped him onto the biobed that awaited him there. She closed the door behind them which blocked out Trip's calls to her to do something. There was nothing for her to do. Ten En was dying and Trip had been sent to them as his replacement. He might not realise it, but he would be better off with them than in the world of raw emotions and hurt which he currently existed in.
"It is done, Patriarch," said Shar Jen.
"Good," said the disembodied voice of Ten En. "See that he is prepared for conjoining and we will begin my removal as soon as he is ready."
"I will see to it," said Shar Jen. She stood for a few minutes trying to feel the emotions of the Patriarch but they were faint and waning. They had found Trip just in time.
Ten En's eyes were shut again. She drew the black covering back over the cylinder, Ten En deserved his peace, he had served the Tien well for his entire life.
"Excuse me, Shar Jen," said a voice behind her. "But I was wondering if you had seen Commander Tucker?"
She turned to see Lieutenant Reed. "I'm sorry Lieutenant, he is not here."
"I thought you were taking him for a tour of the computer?" he said.
"Yes, he left a moment ago," said Shar Jen, "you have only just missed him." The Tien were not good liars, their empathic faculty had meant that it was almost impossible for another Tien not to know when they were being lied to. However, they had become experts at telling half truths and omitting important information.
"Oh, I'm sorry to have bothered you," said Reed and left Shar Jen to her thoughts once again. She could already feel the concern for his friend radiating from the human and she felt her own guilt at what she had done. She was very glad that the humans were not an empathic race.