Truth
Aragorn watched the river go by. He pulled his knees to his chest. He was tainted. When he wad last been here, he had been so
innocent, but now... Aragorn glanced at his wavering reflection. His eyes had almost lost their luster. He sighed, pulling his knees
even closer.
Elrond watched; Glorfindel by his side.
"Something is wrong."
Glorfindel only nodded, knowing Elrond was just thinking aloud.
" He has been this way for weeks. Nothing interests him. Not even Arwen can cheer him."
Glorfindel nodded absently again. Elrond looked at him, slightly irritated.
" Well?"
" Well what?"
" Do you not have anything to say other than simply bobbing your head like a pigeon?" Elrond replied.
Glorfindel shrugged, sending Elrond an amused look.
" I have no idea. I am not the wise one."
Elladan looked at Legolas. Legolas almost cringed at the coldness lurking in the blue eyes. Elladan was not playing around.
" What happened, Legolas?" Elladan repeated, " Estel trusts you like no one else."
Legolas looked away.
" Elladan, he trusts me. I will not betray that trust," Legolas looked up, " Not even for you."
Elladan angrily threw himself upon his bed. Elrohir watched with a degree of betrayal on his face.
" I am sorry, but unless he allows me to tell, then I will not."
Elrohir waved his hand in a dismissive fashion.
" Leave us."
Legolas' face registered hurt and anger.
" I will not be treated as a servant just because I am a trustworthy friend. You-" Legolas shook his head and walked out.
Arwen settled beside Aragorn.
" Tell me what haunts you."
Aragorn looked out, away from her.
" If I told you, I would never show my face to you again."
Arwen titled his chin gently.
" It is that terrible?"
Aragorn nodded, his gold eyes full of shadows and pain.
" Tell me."
Aragorn stood, beginning to walk away. Arwen grabbed his sleeve. He pulled it away.
"Aragorn."
Aragorn spun around.
" Do you not get it? I will not tell you. I will not tell you, Eladan, Elrohir, Ada, Nana Êlenrana. Not one of you. Understand?" Aragorn snapped.
" What about Legolas?"
Aragorn looked away.
" He found out by chance."
" So you would tell him?"
Aragorn cupped her elbow.
" Were it my choice, he would not know ether," Aragorn, then added softer, " Were it my choice, I would have killed myself after."
Arwen's eyes widened. She pulled him close, her heart broken for him.
" I will always be here for you."
Aragorn breathed in at her touch
* I have to do this.
He pushed her away.
" Please do not. Go find another to bestow all you have upon."
He strode away, leaving her. Arwen dropped her head, turning, hands wringing her skirts slightly as she tried not to cry. Aragorn paused, slightly, looking over his shoulder the same time she did. He hardened his look, giving a courteous bow and then leaving.
* Twas for the best.
But no matter how long he recited that, he felt as if he had done wrong.
Arwen found Elrond in the midst of a meeting. She entered, causing him to pause in his talk and then do a double take. Elladan glanced at Elrohir with a worried look at his sister's upset face. The twins glanced at Legolas' empty chair when Elrond looked at it, as if trying to find someone to subdue his upset daughter.
" Undomiel, what-"
Arwen ran into his arms sobbing.
Elrond sent the council a small smile.
" Excuse me," Elrond led her out, " What is wrong, Arwen?"
Arwen only sobbed harder, reminding him of when Celebrian had left.
" Undomiel, tell me."
" He had turned he me away."
Elrond's brow furrowed at the whisper.
" Pardon?"
" Estel. He has refused me. Why, Ada? What happened to him?" Arwen asked.
" I do not know."
" I do."
Legolas strode towards them. Arwen's face clouded.
" Of course you do. He told only you."
Legolas shook his head.
" Look into his eyes and tell me what is missing. Then you will know."
Elrond turned thoughtful. Aragorn came around the corner, expected at the meeting. He froze, seeing the 3. He turned, as if to find another door to the council room.
" Estel, come here."
" I am sorry, Ada. They need me in this meeting."
" Which is momentarily suspended. Come here."
Aragorn approached slowly, his eyes downcast.
" Look at me."
Aragorn lifted his eyes slowly, as if expecting a reprimand. Elrond's eyes swiftly assessed them and his heart died within him.
" Estel."
Aragorn's eyes widened, realizing the tone. He knew. He turned on his heel, running off. Elrond took in a deep breath.
" The bane of man. That would have killed an Elf, but he must live with it forever," he murmured.
" What, Ada?" Arwen asked.
" You need not know, love. No one should."
Aragorn began to throw things into a bag. He would leave. They knew. He could not bear to stay and hear the whispers. He would go to... He paused. Where would he go?
" Why do you run?" a weathered hand touched his shoulder.
Aragorn wrenched his shoulder away, facing the Istar.
" I must leave. I am shamed if I stay."
" Your family loves you," Gandalf pointed out.
" I must go."
Gandalf nodded, seeing the iron in the gold eyes.
" The army of Gondor is accepting recruits."
" Something has come up. I must ask for a leave of this council until after dinner," Elrond re-entered.
All nodded, not quite understanding Elrond's sudden mood change. Glorfindel approached.
" Go find Êlenrana."
Glorfindel nodded, turning away.
" Ada?"
Elrond looked at his sons.
" Go rest. You 2 are going to need it before you leave."
" Ada, what is wrong?" Elrohir asked.
" Nothing that bothers you. Tell Arwen to find Estel for me."
The twins moved off and Legolas appraoched.
" Come, Legolas. You will help me."
Legolas nodded, following.
Arwen knocked on his door again.
" estel, come on."
No answer came from inside. Arwen sighed, throwing her hands in teh air.
" Fine, fine, do not open the door. I will find another way in."
Legolas watched Elrond work, making a potion. Legolas sat upon a stool, one foot on a rung, the other on the floor. Elrond glanced up.
"Go find Arwen and Estel please."
" So you do know how to heal victims?"
Elrond looked down.
" I learned as soon as i could. I would not let what happened to my wife happen again."
" Ada, Ada," Arwen burst into the council.
The council members seemed to all give one long sigh at her interruption.
" Arwen Undomiel, what is the meaning of this?" Elrond stood, his face rigidly stern.
He was extremely irratated. They could not find Estel. He had sent Erestor to look around the area. Arwen bowed slightly.
" Forgive my interruption, Ada, lords, but he is gone."
" Who?" Legolas half-stood, already knowing the answer.
" Estel."
Elrond paced his study.
*He is gone. He feels ashamed. My poor son. To live through...rape...
Elrond visibly shuddered at the mere thought.
*Where could he have gone?
Elrond turned his eyes to the Gil-Estel.
*Where do you go to find hope when you have none?
Elrond found himself back in his study, forgetting all other duties. He stared at the potion he had mixed. It would have eased the man's mind enough so Elrond could have erased the memories enough to make them seem like a nightmare.
*Why did he leave? Does he not think i care? I could have healed him. Why does he run from me? Tis not his fault such a thing happened.
Elrond breathed in deeply, surprised at how upset he was quickly growing. He curled and uncurled his fingers, trying to calm himself. He upset a pile of books from his desk furiously.
*Why him, Eru? Why? First my wife, now my son. Why, tell me, oh wise creator? Are you bent on ruining my happiness? Tell me. Show yourself.
His anger was growing thicker with every breath.
Flashback
He cradled her limp form. Her beautiful form that laid so dead, so lifeless, so unlike her. She barely glowed. Barely breathed. Barely was alive. He laid her head under his chin, pulling her close to comfort her, feeling the weak sobs. She was broken. Not physically, but mentally. She was tainted.
*I am here, love. I am here. Give it to me.
She refused, her mind pushing him out from hers. Elrond frowned, giving a soft kiss to her temple. Why was she pushing him away? He could help her or he would find out how.
He could hear her coming. He could not bear to look at her. He had failed her. He flipped another page, trying to find the right potion, herb, anything. Her hand touched his shoulder as she closed the book.
"Celebrian."
" Let me go, Herven. All the arrangements are made."
Elrond shook his head.
" Please, let me try to find-"
She shushed him.
" I feel the call, Herven. I will find peace there. Please."
Elrond finally nodded, standing. She leaned into his hug.
" When do you leave?"
" In the morning."
End Flashback
Elrond slammed his fist down on the desk, ignoring the piles that fell from it into a mess. No one would be taken from him again.
" I am Denethor, son of Echtelion the second, steward of Gondor. You will be entering an intense training period to single out which of you will become soldiers," he paused, skimming over the recruits, " And who will not."
Aragorn withstood the stony gaze, laughing inwardly. Intense training? He was sure Edain training could not surpass his. The son of the Steward glanced at him as he grilled the man beside Estel. Aragorn met his gaze defiantly. He would not bow to this fool.
" You are an Elf?"
Aragorn sighed. He had meant to cut his hair in the Edain fashion before this. He had forgotten his Elvin looks.
" I am not an Elf, sir."
Denethor sent him a hard look.
" Did I ask you to speak?"
Aragorn mutely shook his head, his gold eyes never wavering from Denethor's.
" Name?"
Aragorn smiled inwardly. Gandalf had already grilled him on this.
" Thoringil," Aragorn answered.
" From where do you hail?"
" Minas Tirth."
Denethor's eyes narrowed. He knew every man in Minas Tirth of recruiting age. He knew every man here except this one. This dark haired loner who had appeared out of thin air.
" You are not from there."
" I was born there. I did not say I live there," Aragorn lied again.
" Then where were you before this?"
" I joined a few rangers and Elf-lords to hunt orc."
Denethor almost rolled his eyes at the absurd lie.
" That was months ago. Lord Elrond's son went missing. Twas a shame."
" He is found and is safely home. Tis what Gandalf and I did for months," Aragorn lied.
Denethor nodded, moving on. Aragorn sighed in relief.
" He's going to be a jolly captain, eh?"
Aragorn glanced at the man beside him.
" Tell me about it. I believe I will die of laughing, not of wounds when with him," Aragorn replied dryly.
" I am Dernier. Stay away from Denethor. You look as if you could upset his power."
Aragorn shook his head. He could, in more ways than one.
Arwen sighed, staring up at the stars. She watched her father's light turn out and sighed, beginning to move out. If they would not search for Aragorn, then she would. A hand clamped over her mouth as she struggled against her captor.
" What in Arda are you doing, Evenstar? You steal my clothes and now try to leave?"
Arwen relaxed.
" Trust me, Legolas."
Legolas' gray eyes were doubtful.
" I will go with you."
" Leg-"
" The orcs are many. Do you wish to add to your father's grief?"
Arwen sighed.
" Come on. I take it you are packed?"
" Aye, Arwen. I did after I watched you steal some of my travelling clothes."
" Ai, get on, you son of darkness."
" Daughter of Morgorth."
Arwen pushed Legolas, taking her horse reins to lead it out. Legolas followed her, attaching his bow and knives to his back. The 2 disappeared into the darkness, unaware to Elrond standing nearby. Elrond shook his head.
*I will have to teach Arwen a lesson in why i ordered her to stay here.