Disclaimer-Gravitation does not belong to me.
I had never been one of those people that were for the other shoe to drop, but after what Yuki and I shared the night before, I wanted to believe that everything was alright with the world.
As well as Hiro and I knew each other, I knew that he would be able to tell that my whole life had changed overnight, that I was not the same Shuichi I had been before. Not only had I recieved my first kiss, but now I was somebody's lover, having been given the gift of a night of passionate lovemaking.
It had been like everything I had thought it would be, and had exceeded my expectations infinity. I was literally giddy in my joy over what happened between Yuki and I, and couldn't wait to share it with my best friend in the whole world.
We had decided to meet in the park where I had first met Yuki, and I knew him instantly through the small crowd that was walking about there. He had rode his motorcycle there to meet me, but his long dark mane looked none the worse for its punishment. He smiled and waved when he saw me, my heart skiping a beat as I saw him.
"Hiroshi!" I shouted, throwing myself into his arms.
Hiro laughed, not surprised at all by my attack, and embraced me. "Hey buddy, I missed you too. You look like you've had a good day." he said.
I nodded in agreement, clasping my hands together in front of me. "I am so happy, Hiroshi! I'll bet you can't guess why!" I exclaimed.
Hiro smiled. "Well, anything that could make my best friend smile the way you are right now must be something really special. Does it have anything to do with Bad Luck?" he asked.
I blushed. "No, but it does have to do with music, the kind that fills your heart when you're the happiest." I told him.
Hiro's eyes suddenly widened with realization. "I know what it is now! It's about you and Yuki, isn't it? You met him last night after the concert, didn't you? Something must have happened last night between you to keep you from gushing about finally meeting Ryuuichi Sakuma face to face." Hiro said.
I glared at him. "If I didn't love you so much, Hiroshi, I'd swear you were taking my fun away on purpose, but nothing could spoil my mood today! Yuki and I became lovers last night, Hiro! Aren't you happy for me?" I asked.
"Well, congratulations. No one deserves happiness more than you, Shindou- san. He must be a great guy to make you feel this good. I'm happy for you, buddy. Here, I brought you a helmut. We have a meeting with Sakano this afternoon." he told me.
"I'm ready. Let's go." I told him, taking the protective gear from him.
I hopped up behind him on the motorcycle, embracing him tightly around the waist as we drove off. I rested my head against the soft leather of his jacket, his hair tickling my face a little, glad that he had a firm waist to be able to endure my arms around him to hold on. The scent of him comforted me as we sped down the road.
"You're right about my meeting Ryuuichi Sakuma too, Hiro. It seems ever since we hooked up with our manager Sakano, that all of our dreams have been coming to fruitation. Now that Ryuuichi is one of my biggest fans and I have you and Yuki in my life, I just know that you and I can achieve whatever we set our minds to, Hiro!" I told him.
He smiled. "I never had any doubts, Shindou-san." he said.
I knew it had to be because of Hiro's faith in us and Bad Luck that kept me from being nervous sitting in the spacious office of the president of our record company, Touma Seguchi. I was more in awe of him than anything, having spent the last five years worshipping the late band like they were the second coming. Ryuuichi had always been my motivation, but even Touma mystified me with his larger than life presense.
"Do you think I'll be like that when I'm famous, Hiro, like a star every young man expires to be like? I hope so!" I gushed.
He beeped my nose. "Shush." he said.
"Thank you for coming on such short notice, gentlemen. It is always a pleasure to see the three of you, the driving force behind Bad Luck, Sakano, Hiroshi, and most importantly Shuichi...I have brought you here today to announce that I have decided to sigh your group to a record deal..." Touma began.
Hiro and I highfived each other with a loud cheer between us. "Yes! I knew we could do it! You and me all the way, Hiroshi!" I exclaimed.
He smiled. "You know it, buddy." he agreed.
Touma ran his fingers through his shaggy platinum blonde hair in frustration at us interrupting him. "There is a stipulation, however, before I can give this project the green light. I think the two of you are very talented, nearly to the scale of our former Nittle Grasper even, but your music lacks a certain something that makes it sellable.
Your manager Sakano and I have had many meetings trying to figure out the best way to fine tune your sound without compromising your musical intregrity. Our best solution that we came up with was to recruit a new member into your group." Touma said.
I rose to my feet then, my eyes as wide as saucers at this news. "What?! You can't be serious! Another bandmate...to make us a trio? This is unacceptable! This is mine and Hiro's band. We created Bad Luck, just the two of us!" I shouted.
Touma nodded, agreeing completely. "Yes. Believe me, I understand how you feel. Ryuuichi used to respond the same way whenever the record company would insist on having studio musicians play backup for him and I. He was as proud of Nittle Grasper as you are of your band, and he eventually came to realize that to get his music heard by a larger audience, sometimes you had to be willing to do whatever it takes.
Like I said, I am a musician myself, so I understand the importance of staying true to your craft and I promise you, Shuichi, this new band member is more than qualified. Of course I won't force you to decide right away. Take some time to talk this over with your partner Hiro and let me know what you decide." Touma said.
Sakano turned to us then. "Please wait for me in the meeting room. I will be along shortly." he told us.
I hadn't dared to interrupt Touma while we were sitting within his office, but inside I was fuming. As much I admired the man, asking Hiro and I to take on a new band member was like slicing my wrists open for all to see. He claimed to understand my predicament, but if that were true, he never would have made the suggestion in the first place.
Bad Luck was my life, my reason for existing, it was everything to me and to allow someone I didn't even know share what Hiro and I created together...it was unthinkable! It was hard to tell how affected Hiro was by this news. He had always been the straight man to my excitable persona, and hadn't said a word since we left the meeting. He looked up into my eyes as I cocked my head at him in curiousity.
'I'd ask you for your opinion, if it wasn't so blantly obvious, Shindou- san." Hiro said.
"You can't blame me for the way I feel,, Hiro. You know I have wrapped my world up into this musical destiny you and I have built together! How do you feel about this, Hiro? Aren't you incensed over this whole concept?" I asked him.
"I'm not sure if you really want my opinion, Shuichi." he said in a regretful voice.
"What?! You don't think he's right, do you? That we need someone to play with us to fine tune our sound?" I asked.
"Look Shuichi, you know that Bad Luck means just as much to me as it does to you, but I don't look at our music through rose colored glasses like you do. I've always considered our music like a work in progress, something that we could always improve upon as our tastes in music widened and we discovered different forms of self expression. There's a part of me that thinks that maybe we should give Touma's idea a try." he said.
I stared at my best friend then, at the verge of tears, at a loss for words on what to say to him. It was like I didn't know him at all, this man who I had thought was my closest friend and the one with whom I had shared a future with. He sensed my shaking from both confusion and frustration, and reached out to touch my face gently.
"You're overreacting as always, Shindou-san. This is not as big a deal as you're making it out to be...Hey!" he exclaimed.
He staggered back a little in surprise as I reached my breaking point with his hateful words, slapping him hard across the face. Without thinking, he returned the punishment, hitting me a lot harder than I had hit him.
The last thing I remembered before running out of the room in tears was Sakano arriving and trying to seperate Hiro and I from fighting. I had never been much of a fighter, but I knew my assault had been enough to make him respond in turn, the two of us waging a vicious verbal war that could leave deep emotional scars on both of us. I had no choice but to run away before Hiro and I jeapordized everything we had worked so hard for in the whirlwind of our heated exchange.
I didn't know what upset me more, that Bad Luck needed to recruit a band member or that Hiro and I had such a bitter fight. In the whole time we had known each other, we very seldom argued and had never once had a physical fight like today, except for the occassional playful roughhousing. We had always made all the decisions concerning Bad Luck together, and it seemed like now we were on opposite sides of a war we could not win.
Remembering the way Hiro had looked at me when I had slapped him tore me into pieces, just as it felt like he stabbed me in the back at the same time. There was no way I would be able to return to the company headquarters in this condition, too wretched with angry, sorrowful tears to find the strength to even stand.
My sobbing began to cease as I felt the carress of a unfamiliar hand brush across my hair. I looked up into the very familiar eyes of the man I had always been able to count on and threw myself into his welcoming embrace. I buried my face into his fragrant brown hair, needing him as much now as I always had.
"Ryuuichi...you're the only one that's always been there for me even when Hiro wasn't. I knew I could depend on you in my time of need." I cried.
"Hiro? Do you mean that long haired guitarist friend of yours? Well of course, Shindou-san, I would never turn away someone who needed me. My manager and I were here to see Touma this afternoon and I insisted that we stop here when I saw that it was you. Dry your tears now, Shuichi. Are you and your friend having problems? Is there anything I can do?" he asked.
I sat up on my knees, wiping my tears away with the back of my hand. I blinked a few times to make sure that I hadn't imagined seeing my idol Ryuuichi kneeling beside me. Even more larger than life than Touma had been, I knew for sure that he wasn't an illusion. The man I idolized had held me in his arms, comforting me, the heat of his body mixing sweetly with the pure male scent of him.
As much as I cared about Yuki, Ryuuichi had been my first real love. He looked as good today as he always did, in a pair of tight black jeans that seemed to have molded themselves to his frame, and a hald unbuttoned black silk shirt with the sleeves rolled up.
"I don't have much, Shuichi, but I have a few things I own on me that I can offer you...let's see...I have a piece of pocket lint, a wooden toy insect from a vending machine, some change with holes in the middle, a bird's nest, maybe, with birds still in it, even a large bottle of sake." he laughed.
I took the bottle of sake from him and gulped it all down in one swallow to the surprise of both him, his manager and the crowd that had started to gather around us. I stumbled a little as I stood up, having Ryuuichi to help me stand up straight.
"Do you feel any better now, Shindou-san?" he asked me.
I looke dup into his reassuring gaze. "Well, I'm not sure exactly how I feel right now, but I'm not going to allow some bastard to take away what I've worked for all this time! I'm going to go in there and fight to save my band's good name!" I shouted.
The crowd applauded loudly at my words and I made an attempt to bow, grabbed by Ryuuichi and his manager before I could fall flat on my face. Too full of myself to remember to thank him, I took off back towards the studio, tripping in my drunkenness.
What I didn't realize is that on the way down I had assaulted a young man, nearly breaking his nose from my foot landing across his face. Our accident had caused him to drop all the paperwork he had been holding in his arms, an assortment of sheet music and an eclectic selection of compact discs.
"Oh my, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have been in such a rush. That was so thoughtless of me. Let me take you inside and get you some medical attention." I told him.
"You look like you need it more than I do...Hey! I know you! You're Shuichi shindou, the lead singer for Bad Luck! You're just the person I wanted to see." he said, smiling through the drying blood covering his hands and face.
"You've heard of me? No kidding? You really came here specifically to meet me?" I asked.
"Oh yes, definitely, you and your friend Hiro. My name is Fujisaki. I'm the new recruit for Bad Luck." he said with a smile.
My life was over as I knew it, but at least I had Yuki to listen to me talk about all the troubles of my day, arguing with Hiro, meeting Fujisaki...I must have gone on and on for hours on everything that was going on with me, feeling even more comfortable with my blonde lover than I usually did talking to Hiro. It was a relief to unburden myself by talking to him, but about the time I thought he would invite me into his bed, he instead asked me to leave.
"I'm sorry, Yuki. I guess I just lost track of time. I promise I won't say another word for the rest of the night." I pleaded.
"Please just leave for tonight, Shuichi. I need some peace and quiet, some time to myself." he told me.
I reluctantly agreed, leaving him with a kiss on the cheek and a warm embrace goodnight. Afterwards, I headed to the only place I knew I could reach in the middle of the night, hoping I wouldn't be turned away. I had drank and talked myself to the point of utter exhaustion, and could barely find the strength to even knock on my best friend's door.
"Shuichi, what are you doing here? It's the middle of the night." he told me.
I collasped at his feet. "Yes I know, Hiro. I just didn't have anywhere else to go. I'm sorry, Hiro. Please forgive me." I said.
He knelt beside me and assisted me into the house, helping me into his already warm bed and pulling the covers over us. He smiled at me, brushing the hair way from my eyes.
"There's nothing to forgive, Shindou-san." he whispered.
I had never been one of those people that were for the other shoe to drop, but after what Yuki and I shared the night before, I wanted to believe that everything was alright with the world.
As well as Hiro and I knew each other, I knew that he would be able to tell that my whole life had changed overnight, that I was not the same Shuichi I had been before. Not only had I recieved my first kiss, but now I was somebody's lover, having been given the gift of a night of passionate lovemaking.
It had been like everything I had thought it would be, and had exceeded my expectations infinity. I was literally giddy in my joy over what happened between Yuki and I, and couldn't wait to share it with my best friend in the whole world.
We had decided to meet in the park where I had first met Yuki, and I knew him instantly through the small crowd that was walking about there. He had rode his motorcycle there to meet me, but his long dark mane looked none the worse for its punishment. He smiled and waved when he saw me, my heart skiping a beat as I saw him.
"Hiroshi!" I shouted, throwing myself into his arms.
Hiro laughed, not surprised at all by my attack, and embraced me. "Hey buddy, I missed you too. You look like you've had a good day." he said.
I nodded in agreement, clasping my hands together in front of me. "I am so happy, Hiroshi! I'll bet you can't guess why!" I exclaimed.
Hiro smiled. "Well, anything that could make my best friend smile the way you are right now must be something really special. Does it have anything to do with Bad Luck?" he asked.
I blushed. "No, but it does have to do with music, the kind that fills your heart when you're the happiest." I told him.
Hiro's eyes suddenly widened with realization. "I know what it is now! It's about you and Yuki, isn't it? You met him last night after the concert, didn't you? Something must have happened last night between you to keep you from gushing about finally meeting Ryuuichi Sakuma face to face." Hiro said.
I glared at him. "If I didn't love you so much, Hiroshi, I'd swear you were taking my fun away on purpose, but nothing could spoil my mood today! Yuki and I became lovers last night, Hiro! Aren't you happy for me?" I asked.
"Well, congratulations. No one deserves happiness more than you, Shindou- san. He must be a great guy to make you feel this good. I'm happy for you, buddy. Here, I brought you a helmut. We have a meeting with Sakano this afternoon." he told me.
"I'm ready. Let's go." I told him, taking the protective gear from him.
I hopped up behind him on the motorcycle, embracing him tightly around the waist as we drove off. I rested my head against the soft leather of his jacket, his hair tickling my face a little, glad that he had a firm waist to be able to endure my arms around him to hold on. The scent of him comforted me as we sped down the road.
"You're right about my meeting Ryuuichi Sakuma too, Hiro. It seems ever since we hooked up with our manager Sakano, that all of our dreams have been coming to fruitation. Now that Ryuuichi is one of my biggest fans and I have you and Yuki in my life, I just know that you and I can achieve whatever we set our minds to, Hiro!" I told him.
He smiled. "I never had any doubts, Shindou-san." he said.
I knew it had to be because of Hiro's faith in us and Bad Luck that kept me from being nervous sitting in the spacious office of the president of our record company, Touma Seguchi. I was more in awe of him than anything, having spent the last five years worshipping the late band like they were the second coming. Ryuuichi had always been my motivation, but even Touma mystified me with his larger than life presense.
"Do you think I'll be like that when I'm famous, Hiro, like a star every young man expires to be like? I hope so!" I gushed.
He beeped my nose. "Shush." he said.
"Thank you for coming on such short notice, gentlemen. It is always a pleasure to see the three of you, the driving force behind Bad Luck, Sakano, Hiroshi, and most importantly Shuichi...I have brought you here today to announce that I have decided to sigh your group to a record deal..." Touma began.
Hiro and I highfived each other with a loud cheer between us. "Yes! I knew we could do it! You and me all the way, Hiroshi!" I exclaimed.
He smiled. "You know it, buddy." he agreed.
Touma ran his fingers through his shaggy platinum blonde hair in frustration at us interrupting him. "There is a stipulation, however, before I can give this project the green light. I think the two of you are very talented, nearly to the scale of our former Nittle Grasper even, but your music lacks a certain something that makes it sellable.
Your manager Sakano and I have had many meetings trying to figure out the best way to fine tune your sound without compromising your musical intregrity. Our best solution that we came up with was to recruit a new member into your group." Touma said.
I rose to my feet then, my eyes as wide as saucers at this news. "What?! You can't be serious! Another bandmate...to make us a trio? This is unacceptable! This is mine and Hiro's band. We created Bad Luck, just the two of us!" I shouted.
Touma nodded, agreeing completely. "Yes. Believe me, I understand how you feel. Ryuuichi used to respond the same way whenever the record company would insist on having studio musicians play backup for him and I. He was as proud of Nittle Grasper as you are of your band, and he eventually came to realize that to get his music heard by a larger audience, sometimes you had to be willing to do whatever it takes.
Like I said, I am a musician myself, so I understand the importance of staying true to your craft and I promise you, Shuichi, this new band member is more than qualified. Of course I won't force you to decide right away. Take some time to talk this over with your partner Hiro and let me know what you decide." Touma said.
Sakano turned to us then. "Please wait for me in the meeting room. I will be along shortly." he told us.
I hadn't dared to interrupt Touma while we were sitting within his office, but inside I was fuming. As much I admired the man, asking Hiro and I to take on a new band member was like slicing my wrists open for all to see. He claimed to understand my predicament, but if that were true, he never would have made the suggestion in the first place.
Bad Luck was my life, my reason for existing, it was everything to me and to allow someone I didn't even know share what Hiro and I created together...it was unthinkable! It was hard to tell how affected Hiro was by this news. He had always been the straight man to my excitable persona, and hadn't said a word since we left the meeting. He looked up into my eyes as I cocked my head at him in curiousity.
'I'd ask you for your opinion, if it wasn't so blantly obvious, Shindou- san." Hiro said.
"You can't blame me for the way I feel,, Hiro. You know I have wrapped my world up into this musical destiny you and I have built together! How do you feel about this, Hiro? Aren't you incensed over this whole concept?" I asked him.
"I'm not sure if you really want my opinion, Shuichi." he said in a regretful voice.
"What?! You don't think he's right, do you? That we need someone to play with us to fine tune our sound?" I asked.
"Look Shuichi, you know that Bad Luck means just as much to me as it does to you, but I don't look at our music through rose colored glasses like you do. I've always considered our music like a work in progress, something that we could always improve upon as our tastes in music widened and we discovered different forms of self expression. There's a part of me that thinks that maybe we should give Touma's idea a try." he said.
I stared at my best friend then, at the verge of tears, at a loss for words on what to say to him. It was like I didn't know him at all, this man who I had thought was my closest friend and the one with whom I had shared a future with. He sensed my shaking from both confusion and frustration, and reached out to touch my face gently.
"You're overreacting as always, Shindou-san. This is not as big a deal as you're making it out to be...Hey!" he exclaimed.
He staggered back a little in surprise as I reached my breaking point with his hateful words, slapping him hard across the face. Without thinking, he returned the punishment, hitting me a lot harder than I had hit him.
The last thing I remembered before running out of the room in tears was Sakano arriving and trying to seperate Hiro and I from fighting. I had never been much of a fighter, but I knew my assault had been enough to make him respond in turn, the two of us waging a vicious verbal war that could leave deep emotional scars on both of us. I had no choice but to run away before Hiro and I jeapordized everything we had worked so hard for in the whirlwind of our heated exchange.
I didn't know what upset me more, that Bad Luck needed to recruit a band member or that Hiro and I had such a bitter fight. In the whole time we had known each other, we very seldom argued and had never once had a physical fight like today, except for the occassional playful roughhousing. We had always made all the decisions concerning Bad Luck together, and it seemed like now we were on opposite sides of a war we could not win.
Remembering the way Hiro had looked at me when I had slapped him tore me into pieces, just as it felt like he stabbed me in the back at the same time. There was no way I would be able to return to the company headquarters in this condition, too wretched with angry, sorrowful tears to find the strength to even stand.
My sobbing began to cease as I felt the carress of a unfamiliar hand brush across my hair. I looked up into the very familiar eyes of the man I had always been able to count on and threw myself into his welcoming embrace. I buried my face into his fragrant brown hair, needing him as much now as I always had.
"Ryuuichi...you're the only one that's always been there for me even when Hiro wasn't. I knew I could depend on you in my time of need." I cried.
"Hiro? Do you mean that long haired guitarist friend of yours? Well of course, Shindou-san, I would never turn away someone who needed me. My manager and I were here to see Touma this afternoon and I insisted that we stop here when I saw that it was you. Dry your tears now, Shuichi. Are you and your friend having problems? Is there anything I can do?" he asked.
I sat up on my knees, wiping my tears away with the back of my hand. I blinked a few times to make sure that I hadn't imagined seeing my idol Ryuuichi kneeling beside me. Even more larger than life than Touma had been, I knew for sure that he wasn't an illusion. The man I idolized had held me in his arms, comforting me, the heat of his body mixing sweetly with the pure male scent of him.
As much as I cared about Yuki, Ryuuichi had been my first real love. He looked as good today as he always did, in a pair of tight black jeans that seemed to have molded themselves to his frame, and a hald unbuttoned black silk shirt with the sleeves rolled up.
"I don't have much, Shuichi, but I have a few things I own on me that I can offer you...let's see...I have a piece of pocket lint, a wooden toy insect from a vending machine, some change with holes in the middle, a bird's nest, maybe, with birds still in it, even a large bottle of sake." he laughed.
I took the bottle of sake from him and gulped it all down in one swallow to the surprise of both him, his manager and the crowd that had started to gather around us. I stumbled a little as I stood up, having Ryuuichi to help me stand up straight.
"Do you feel any better now, Shindou-san?" he asked me.
I looke dup into his reassuring gaze. "Well, I'm not sure exactly how I feel right now, but I'm not going to allow some bastard to take away what I've worked for all this time! I'm going to go in there and fight to save my band's good name!" I shouted.
The crowd applauded loudly at my words and I made an attempt to bow, grabbed by Ryuuichi and his manager before I could fall flat on my face. Too full of myself to remember to thank him, I took off back towards the studio, tripping in my drunkenness.
What I didn't realize is that on the way down I had assaulted a young man, nearly breaking his nose from my foot landing across his face. Our accident had caused him to drop all the paperwork he had been holding in his arms, an assortment of sheet music and an eclectic selection of compact discs.
"Oh my, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have been in such a rush. That was so thoughtless of me. Let me take you inside and get you some medical attention." I told him.
"You look like you need it more than I do...Hey! I know you! You're Shuichi shindou, the lead singer for Bad Luck! You're just the person I wanted to see." he said, smiling through the drying blood covering his hands and face.
"You've heard of me? No kidding? You really came here specifically to meet me?" I asked.
"Oh yes, definitely, you and your friend Hiro. My name is Fujisaki. I'm the new recruit for Bad Luck." he said with a smile.
My life was over as I knew it, but at least I had Yuki to listen to me talk about all the troubles of my day, arguing with Hiro, meeting Fujisaki...I must have gone on and on for hours on everything that was going on with me, feeling even more comfortable with my blonde lover than I usually did talking to Hiro. It was a relief to unburden myself by talking to him, but about the time I thought he would invite me into his bed, he instead asked me to leave.
"I'm sorry, Yuki. I guess I just lost track of time. I promise I won't say another word for the rest of the night." I pleaded.
"Please just leave for tonight, Shuichi. I need some peace and quiet, some time to myself." he told me.
I reluctantly agreed, leaving him with a kiss on the cheek and a warm embrace goodnight. Afterwards, I headed to the only place I knew I could reach in the middle of the night, hoping I wouldn't be turned away. I had drank and talked myself to the point of utter exhaustion, and could barely find the strength to even knock on my best friend's door.
"Shuichi, what are you doing here? It's the middle of the night." he told me.
I collasped at his feet. "Yes I know, Hiro. I just didn't have anywhere else to go. I'm sorry, Hiro. Please forgive me." I said.
He knelt beside me and assisted me into the house, helping me into his already warm bed and pulling the covers over us. He smiled at me, brushing the hair way from my eyes.
"There's nothing to forgive, Shindou-san." he whispered.