Title: Sex Triangle
Pairing: HP/NT/SS + HP/others + R/H
Summary: It's Harry's sixth year, and when it begins, Harry thinks it will just be another year of fighting evil and bad things happening. However, when Harry's self-confidence gets a boost (with the help of the Weasley twins), he starts to see life in a whole new light. Of course, being overly confident can land you in a lot of trouble, as Harry learns the hard way. So can accepting help from Fred and George...
The Hogwarts Express was waiting at platform nine and three quarters when the clock struck five to eleven on September first.
Harry, Hermione and Ron were all on the platform, eagerly waiting to start their sixth year at Hogwarts. Hermione and Ron each adorned shiny golden prefect badges. Both of their respective parents were there to see them off. While the Grangers said goodbye to Hermione, and Molly fussed over Ron and Ginny, Fred and George Weasley pulled Harry aside and talked to him in hushed whispers.
"So Harry, we heard that you've been having girl troubles, eh?" said Fred with an expression that boardered on smugness and pity.
"Not able to perform, huh?" commented George with mock sympathy. Harry glared at them both.
"I suppose Ron told you two huh? Well it's none of you're business how I manage my love life," said Harry, mildly annoyed that they'd go snooping about his affairs. Or lack thereof. Of course everybody knew about what had happened. It was old news by now, surely.
"Wow wow, me man, Harry. Just hang on for a bit," Fred said.
"Yeah, just hear us out man. You got involved with Cho Chang-"
"-For some reason," Fred broke in.
"God knows why. Everybody knew she was nutters."
"She seemed normal enough to me..." trailed off Harry, looking at his feet, disgruntled. Why were they poking fun at him?
"Yeah, well you didn't know her that well."
"Not the way we did, if you get what I mean." Fred winked at Harry and George waggled his eyebrows suggestively with a growing smirk. Harry's eyes practically bulged out of their sockets.
"B-but...when?!" Harry sputtered.
"The last few weeks of your first year. You see, whenever she was happy in a relationship, she'd freak out and break it off for no reason. She denied herself, and no one knows why. It's just a thing she does," said Fred off- handedly.
"And you had the misfortune of getting involved with her. But this year, Harry, this year you are gonna rock the world of all the senior girls at Hogwarts," said George with a great deal of confidence.
"And if you're very lucky, of Professor Sinistra too!" added Fred mischievously. He sucked in a breath and licked his lips. "The body on that woman! Oh yeah!"
"Face ain't great though! Little busted..."
Fred nodded gleefully in agreement. Then he smiled wryly. "Too bad she was born without a sense of humour. Even so, the body makes up for it. All you need is at least one paper bag...Anyway-" he continued.
Harry just looked back and forth between the twins with a look of horror as they rattled on about who'd be great in the sack, all the things that Harry would do that year (in the sack, they kept insinuating), and did it in a manner that would mortify a corpse.
"-And, then, you hide the proverbial sausage, all the while-"
"Just shut up!!!!" yelled Harry. Several people on the platform went silent for a few seconds before resuming their conversations. "You guys, I'm hopeless with girls! I accept that! You should too. I don't need your 'advice'. And besides, it isn't any business of yours."
Fred and George exchanged glances and nodded. They returned to Harry, and got closer. When they spoke now, it was in serious whispers.
"That, our friend, is where you are wrong," said Fred cryptically. Harry eyed them suspiciously.
"Just what are you two getting at." George moved right up to Harry and took his hand in his own, pretending to shake it. When he released it Harry was holding a small, unmarked plastic bottle. Harry rattled it, hearing dozens of pills shuffle around inside. "Medicine? Why are you giving me these? What are they for?"
"This is the latest invention from Weasley Wizarding Wheezes. It's experimental."
"And?" Then it dawned on Harry and a look of understanding came over him. "Wait a minute, is this somehow supposed to get me girls?" Fred nodded enthusiastically.
"Now you're catching on. There's a great deal in it for you if you test it out for us." Harry looked at them absurdly.
"You mean you haven't any idea what its effects are? I won't be your guinea pig! What if something happens like it shrivels up my...my bits and pieces! Or the opposite!?" he exclaimed while furiously motioning with his hands what he meant. They both chuckled quietly.
"Relax mate. We already tested them for side effects. What they do is make you feel sexier and more confident."
"Oh. But if you've already tested them, why do you need me to do it?"
"Because it had no effect on us!" George exclaimed as if it were obvious. Harry stared blankly at them. George sighed and rubbed his forehead. "We already feel so sexy and confident that it didn't have any noticeable effect on us."
"But" Fred began while grinning mischievously. "For someone like you, it could make you a whole new person. For an hour or so at least."
"Hey!" said Harry in response you their jeer. Fred looked a bit guilty.
"Sorry mate. It's just that, well, you haven't had many relationships. Judging by your reaction to most girls, one would swear that you grew up in a cupboard under the...oh, right." They both snickered and Harry shot them a dirty look.
He was about to retort when the train blew its whistle, signalling that it was leaving. Harry panicked when the train pulled away from the platform without him. He didn't want to miss the train again. Not after what happened to him and Ron in second year.
"Run Harry! You can still hop on!" yelled Molly Weasley as Harry sprinted down the tiled pathway, trying his best to catch up with it. Without too much difficulty he managed to hop onto the rear carrage. He grabbed onto a golden railing that framed an open door and let the train carry him away. He could just make out Fred and George yelling something at him. The only word he caught was 'alcohol'. He didn't think about it for long.
He stumbled into the carriage, closing the door behind him, and leaned his back against the wall, trying to catch his breath. He closed his eyes and rested his head.
"Well, well, well. If it isn't Potter," came the crisp voice of Malfoy. Of all the cars, why was Malfoy and his cronies in this one? "Obviously thinking that he's so important the train will wait for him. After all, everyone else does what Potter wants. Mudblood Granger, The Weasel. Even the headmaster if Potter complains enough. Next thing you know Scrimgour will make him Order Of Merlin!"
"Go to hell Malfoy," Harry said flatly without moving. "Or better, go visit your father in Azkaban. With that dark mark on your arm I'm sure they'd love to keep you for a while." Malfoy's eyes took on a slightly panicked look.
"How'd you-" He began, but was cut off by a door opening behind him. What he though had been a wall was actually a door to a magically enlarged washroom. He moved away to let the person on the inside come out.
"Eh? Who's there? Oh! Hello Harry! Wots the story? Haven't seen you for a while!" Harry leaned in closer to get a better look at this woman who had stepped out of the washroom.
"Tonks? Is that you?" Harry asked, sounding hopeful. If she was on the Hogwarts express then she could get him out of Malfoy's presence. Tonks looked a bit uncertain. She scratched her head, where a mop of short, silky black hair, not unlike Harry's, had replaced her usual bizarrely coloured hair.
"I don't know Harrikins. It was the last time I checked." Harry would have laughed had she not called him Harrikins. Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle were all snickering at the pet name.
"Harrikins? So are you meant to be his girlfriend, or his nanny?" taunted Draco.
Tonks looked contemplative for a second, winked at Harry, and then turned around to the three Slytherins. "Bitta both, actually," she declared airily. A light pink blush spread to Harry's cheeks. What was she doing?
Malfoy leaned over to Crabbe and Goyle and whispered "Doesn't she remind you a bit of Loony Lovegood?" causing the two oafs to gawful. He straightened up and brushed a hand over his hair.
"What is a pretty young woman such as you doing with a loser like him?" he asked while pointing at Harry. Then he did something daring. He snaked his arm around Tonks' waist and pulled her close to him, all the while looking at Harry. "When you could be with a pure-blood like me?" A wicked gleam came into his eyes, and he leaned into her ear so that he could languidly whisper to her. "You can spank me if I'm naughty. Of course, what goes around comes around."
Harry closed his eyes as he was expecting her to slap him for his behaviour. But it never came. Instead, Tonks exhaled softly and giggled. "My, my Mr. Malfoy. You certainly are sure of your abilities to woo innocent young girls like me into your-" she glanced down suggestively. "-clutches." Malfoy and Tonks chuckled softly. Harry didn't understand why though.
"Well, I have been told by a number of ladies that I excel at it," Malfoy purred, before moving in to kiss her, but Tonks pulled back.
"Are you sure they just weren't trying to get some Malfoy money? The Malfoy's are, after all, the richest Wizarding family in the world. I heard that you have over a million Galleons in the bank. Or at least you did before the ministry confiscated everything anyway..." Malfoy frowned and released her.
"Maybe you should watch your tongue, Tonks," he spat with disdain. Tonks? That name sounds familiar somehow, thought Draco.
"Come on Harry. Let's get our own carriage. This one feels...poor," suggested Tonks, looking at Malfoy, whose eye twitched. Harry jumped at the idea. The three Slytherins stepped aside and let Harry and Tonks pass. When they shut the door behind them, Malfoy turned to glare at the other Slytherins in the carriage, daring them to comment.
"What the hell was that!?" demanded Harry as he and Tonks walked towards the far end of the train, to find Hermione and Ron.
"That was me playing around with Malfoy," answered Tonks, who was behind Harry. Harry hoped that none of the other students would pay any attention to what they were saying. "Smarmy asshole. Maybe loosing all his money will teach him something. Might be hoping for a bit much mind you.."
"A bit more than playing! You almost kissed the slimeball! And now he thinks that I'm your boyfriend! It'll be all over the school before the end of the week!"
"He almost kissed me. It's completely different. Besides, I'm a fully trained auror. I'm quite capable of taking care of myself. I'm also an adult, and adults have certain urges, Harry. Sexual urges," she said with exaggerated sultriness, trying to get a rise out of him. She knew she was making him uncomfortable and loved it. "And what could be so bad about going out with me? Everyone seems to want to do it" she pouted.
"Nothing," answered Harry stiffly. "It's just that you're, well, like ten years older than me. And an auror." Tonks looked surprised.
"Oh. I would have thought that those would be pluses. Older woman to show you the ropes, and one who has a very good job." Harry stopped and turned around suddenly, almost causing Tonks to bump into him. Harry looked nervous and fidgety under Tonks stare.
"Look, can we just not talk about this. Its embarrassing for me," Harry requested gingerly. Tonks just nodded. They were silent for the rest of walk.
When Harry and Tonks opened the door to the end carriage, they nearly collided with Ron and Hermione, who were just on their way out.
"Harry! There you are. We were beginning to think that you'd missed the train again!" exclaimed Ron.
"I almost did! I had to run for it. Fred and George held me up." His tone darkened. "Then I ran into Malfoy down the other end. Tonks help me out though." Ron and Hermione then recognised Tonks.
"Hi Tonks! I didn't know it was you. I've never seen you with black hair. What are doing here anyway?" asked Hermione curiously. They went into the end carrage, all four of them sitting down around the table, Harry and Tonks facing Ron and Hermione. Tonks was about to answer, but Ron cut her off.
"I think it's a bit obvious, Hermione. She's probably the new DADA teacher. Either that or Harry's new nanny." Harry shot Ron a fierce look.
"And just what do you mean by that Ron?" Harry demanded. What a coincidence that term would be uttered on both sides of the train, both times in a jibe at Harry. Ron furrowed his brow.
"I mean that Dumbledore probably assigned her to make sure you-know-who supporters don't get you. What did you think I meant?" Ron asked curiously. Harry ignored him.
Tonks smiled. "Both, actually. Ten points to Gryffindor for figuring it out!" Ron began to grin.
"Yes, but unfortunately house points can only be awarded or taken away from inside the castle grounds," said Hermione informatively. Ron's face fell.
"Thanks for that one Hermione. Ignorance is bliss, you know. Wait, I suppose you don't."
"And just what is that supposed to mean Ron Weasley!" Hermione asked angrily.
"It means that sometimes people are better off not knowing things!" Those words, though aimed at Hermione, hit Harry hard. He thought of Sirius. If only he and Sirius had been better informed, his godfather would still be alive.
"No, Ron," he said firmly. "Ignorance gets people killed. Just look at-.' Harry couldn't bring himself to say Sirius' name. Ron and Hermione both fell silent. They exchanged a glance.
"We're sorry Harry. We didn't mean it like that," said Ron. Harry gave them both a weak smile and nodded.
"I know you didn't mean anything bad. It's okay." A short silence ensued, which was broken by Hermione.
"So Tonks, tell us how you came by the DADA job. I assume you know its history? You aren't...anxious about it?"
"Anxious? Not at all! It isn't as if it's cursed."
"But it might be!" exclaimed Ron excitedly. "You never know!" Tonks shook her head.
"It's not. Dumbledore checked after the Tri-wizard tournament. And yes, I do know its history. I may only be staying for one year. Maybe not even. It depends on death eater activity. I'm a junior auror, but if it gets too bad I'll be called away from Hogwarts," she explained animatedly.
"A junior auror? But back there you said you were a fully trained auror," said Harry, who was a bit lost. Ron rolled his eyes at Harry's ignorance and filled him in.
"There are four different classes of aurors, Harry. When you sign up you become a trainee auror. After five years of training you become a junior auror. Ten years after you become a junior, you're granted the status of a fully-fledged auror. In order to become a senior auror to have to have special qualifications. I'm not sure what they are. Tonks?" Ron looked at Tonks, expecting her to finish for him.
"To become a senior auror you must have been on the force for at least forty years, you have to excel at everything from muggle studies to astronomy. You even have to be able to cast the imperius curse, and have an ability to perform the dark arts. Further more, you need to have actual battle experience. You could be as powerful as Dumbledore, but if you hadn't ever been in a real fight with a real dark wizard, you couldn't get promoted." Ron's face darkened slightly.
"So it sound like it's tough to get to the top, huh?" he asked, the slightest hint of suspicion in his voice. Tonks nodded vigorously.
"Yeah. But when a senior auror retires, usually around their centennial, they're almost guaranteed to get a very good job in government or in teaching. Oh yeah! All senior aurors are granted Order of Merlin third class," she said almost wistfully. Ron nodded darkly.
"So one might say that you need to be ambitious to become an auror. Does it matter what house you're from?" Tonks raised her eyebrows and shook her head.
"No. But most aurors are Slytherin." Ron gasped, and Harry and Hermione just exchanged sharp glances. "Ok, not most...about half. The other half are Griffinfdor. And the other half are the other two houses and foregin wizards." Tonks said, trying to reassure them.
"Three halves?" said Hermione sardonically with a crass grin. Tonks rolled her eyes dismissively.
"But-but why? What about Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs? Why so few?" asked Ron. Tonks shrugged her shoulders.
"Being an auror is hard work. Lotsa learning and stuff. You'd think that both Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw fit these criteria well, but in practice they don't. Being an auror is very dangerous hands on work. Hufflepuffs aren't famous for their bravery, and most Ravenclaws would love the learning aspect of the job, but wouldn't then be too good at the practical part. But Gryffindors are brave and excel at combat, and Slytherins are ambitious enough to overcome all obstacles. There are more Slytherins than Gryffindors because of the ambition aspect. There aren't many jobs that a witch or wizard wouldn't be accepted into if they used to be an auror. Many Slytherins become aurors for a few years, then quit after they pass their training, just so that they can get into another job. Because of this, there are actually more senior aurors that are Gryffindors than there are those in Slytherin. You three look surprised," she pointed out.
Harry grinned sheepishly. "We are. Most of the Slytherins we know are evil." Tonks snorted and rolled her eyes.
"Evil?" she said sceptically. Ron nodded; Hermione remained motionless, while Harry kept grinning.
"Evil," Ron confirmed. "Especially Malfoy." Tonks laughed out loud.
"Malfoy? Evil? Ha!" Ron just looked perplexed. "He may be a shallow, snobby, nasty, horny, devil-may-care kinda bloke, hell, he might even be bad, but he's not evil." Ron slowly shrugged. He could see her point, but he didn't like it. There was several minutes' silence.
"Tonks, what made you say horny?" Ron asked out of the blue. He'd been itching to ask that question since she mentioned the word, but was too nervous to up until now. Tonks got a wicked gleam in her eyes and, sparing a glance at a frantic Harry, proceeded to relay the story of what had happened between her and Malfoy. By the end of it Ron had a look a disbelieving humour about him. Hermione was just shocked.
"But-Tonks, what if Dumbledore finds out? Won't you get into trouble for being so...intimate with a student?" she asked, concerned for Tonks.
"Not to mention a Malfoy! He'll find out you're the DADA teacher sooner or later. What will the school think? You can't keep it a secret...wait, you could! You're a-" He was cut off by Tonks, who covered his mouth with her hand. She glared at him as if to say don't ever mention that. He stopped muffling and was still. Tonks withdrew her hand and sat back in her seat. She fixed her and smiled at Ron to reassure him that she wasn't angry with him.
"Sorry, but some things are private and should not be mentioned, even when I'm not around. You never know who might be listening." Tonks raised her eyebrows impressionably at Ron, who nodded in understanding.
The rest of the journey was uneventful. Luna, Nevill and Ginny ended up joining them to chat for the rest of the trip. Harry learned that Ron had taken all of Harry's stuff on board the train. Harry couldn't believe that it had taken him so long to realise that he had left Hedwig and all his stuff on the platform. At some point, Tonks vanished and wasn't seen again for the rest of the ride.
When the train pulled up to Hogwarts station, Harry could hear the familiar drone of Hagrid saying 'Firs' years over here please'. Harry looked around at all the students, trying to spot some familiar faces. He noted with surprise that he could see over shoulders of most people there. He had grown enough to now be considered one of the tallest boys in the school.
"Was I that short when I was in first year?" He wondered, noting with slight awe that he was at least a foot taller than every one of the first years, and most of the second years. He briefly wondered what it was like for Ron, who was several inches taller than he was.
Harry forgot about it and walked with the rest of the students towards the carriages. He slowed as he approached the Thestrals. One of the leathery, horse-like animals looked him in the eye, recognising him as someone that could see them. He walked up to it and tentatively placed his hand on its neck. When it didn't pull away, he slowly began to stroke it. It snorted after a while and Harry stopped his ministrations.
"What are you doing Harry?" asked a curious voice from behind him. It was Colin Creevey, now a fifth year and Gryffindors prefect.
"I'm petting the Thestral." Colin looked at Harry strangely.
"The what? But there's nothing there Harry!" he exclaimed, understandably unable to see it. A second year girl who was behind Colin was staring right at the Thestrals and shaking with fright.
"H-how can you say that? I can't believe that the headmaster would allow creatures like these to pull the carriages!"
"Thestrals? What are they? And why can't I see them?" asked Colin, bewildered.
"T-Thestrals can only be seen by dark wizards! Why can I see them?! I may be in Slytherin, but I'm not a dark wizard!" said the girl, who Harry though was probably more afraid of being a dark wizard than she was of the beasts themselves.
"Oh no," began Harry in a sympathetic tone. "You're mistaken. Thestrals aren't seen because one is dark. Only people who have witnessed death first hand can see them. Because dark wizards-" he paused, trying to stomach what he was about to say. He firmed his tone and continued more surely. "Because dark wizards kill, they see Thestrals. Because of this, people jump to the wrong conclusions. They're actually very gentle creatures. I can see them because I saw..." he trailed off briefly before proceeding carefully. "You can see them too, which means..." The girl looked at her feet and didn't reply. She muttered a goodbye and strode off, leaving Harry feeling guilty, thinking that he had pried into her private affairs. Colin, seeing Harry's sad expression patted him on the shoulder.
"No worries Harry. She's just a kid. Forget about her."
Just a kid huh? Funny, up until this very moment, Harry would've said the same thing about Colin. Not anymore though.
Just then Ron and Hermione came up to Harry to tell him that they'd secured a carriage for the three of them. Harry waved goodbye to Colin, who hopped into a carriage with his younger brother, Dennis. Harry, Hermione and Ron headed to their carrige and got in. After a few moments the carriages took off for the castle, which was now brightly lit up by the twilight. The last rays of the sun shone from behind the distant highlands. The castle was about two minutes away.
"Hey Hermione, what's that under you're seat?" asked Ron, who spied a very small red light between her and Harry.
"What's what?" she said as she tried to get a better look.
Ron reached forward and grasped it. It came away with little effort. "This." Ron just looked at it perplexed. "And what are these numbers for?" Ron showed it to Hermione, who screamed when she saw it.
"Ron, it's a bomb! And it's gonna explode in thirty seconds!! Quick, throw it out the window!" Ron pushed the window down so fast that he could hear the glass crack. He drew back his throwing arm and tossed it with all his strength, just for it to bounce back.
"The carriage is charmed against it!!!" he exclaimed. Harry grabbed it tried to gently place it outside. His hand was stopped just before it was outside. He pushed with all his strength. The result was that he somehow managed to fly out the window himself. He shouted with fright, thinking he'd fall, as he wasn't holding onto anything except the bomb. With his weight outside, the carriage tipped over to left, throwing it off course, causing Ron and Hermione to be slammed against the wall. Hermione screamed as she tumbled out the window. "HERMIONE!!!" Without thinking, Ron leapt after her, not caring that he had just jumped from the carrige. He could see the world from a birdseye view. About three feet below him was Hermione, seemingly falling in slow motion, a look a pure shock and horror etched into her face. Three hundred feet below her was the lake. They both knew that if she hit the water, every bone in her body would break and she'd die instantly.
Ron managed to grab her hand with one for his, and to wrap his other arm around Harry's legs. Both of Harry's arms were suddenly jerked as the combined weight of both Hermione and Ron was realised. Harry groaned with pain as he carried the weight of the three of them. Ron looked up to see that Harry had both his arms wrapped firmly around the bomb. The bomb was the only thing keeping them from a fatal drop. Due to the charm, it was stuck in mid air right in the middle of the opening.
"Ugh!!" I don't know if I can hold on much longer guys!" cried Harry. The bombs timer now read ten seconds. "I don't know if I should either!" Hermione looked down at the water and then up at the bomb. She had to think fast.
"Harry, you'll have to let go! We could survive the fall if we reduce the area of impact by going into the water feet first!" Hermione called desperately, her voice almost muffled by the chilling wind whistling past. Harry looked down at the water, then to Hermione and Ron, then back at the bomb. The timer read five...four...three...he let go. His breath caught in his throat. He looked down, then heard a large boom and felt a great heat on the back of his head. Ron had let go of his legs and was trying to fall feet first. Harry could see the water. It was getting closer every nanosecond.
Had he been watching, he would have seen the Thestral that had been pulling his carriage swoop down, burning reigns still attached, and skim the surface of the water. It seemed to gallop on the very surface of the lake. All three of them landed on its back with a thud and a groan (especially from Ron and Harry). It carried on as if it had no weight at all. Harry opened his eyes and saw bits of burning debris fall from the sky and disappear beneath the waves.
The Thestral carried them to Hogwarts, where the rest of the school was just stepping from their carriages. Those who saw the explosion spread the word instantly, and suddenly students were crowding around the trio asking them what had happened, praising them and whatnot.
"Stand aside children! Stand aside!" came the sharp voice of Professor McGonagall. When her eyes came to rest on the three of them sitting on the back of the Thestral she looked visibly relieved. She looked stern again. "Okay all of you, inside. Nothing more to see here." The large crowd quickly dispersed and they disappeared behind the doors of the great hall, motivated more by the mouthwatering aroma of the awaiting feast than by the stern witch. McGonagall turned back to the three of them. Ron was just helping Hermione off of the Thestral while Harry stroked its black leathery nose while whispering words of thanks to it. "What on earth happened Mr. Potter? I was standing here awaiting the arrival of the students when all of a sudden I saw the three of you fall out off the carriage. I nearly had a heart attack when you all fell. Then the carriage exploded! I was too far away to help." Harry had never seen McGonagall so flustered.
The three of them explained what had happened. When it was over, McGonagall was chastising them. "You should have been more vigilant! Did you learn nothing in DADA the year before last? Harry, you know that the Dark Lord wants you dead! And Ronald Weasley!" Ron flinched. "You jumped out of the carriage!?"
"But if I didn't, Hermione-"
"No buts, Mr. Weasley! It was extremely reckless." Her face softened. "But it was also extremely brave. For proving that you are indeed worthy of being a Gryffindor, and for saving the life of a fellow student, I award one hundred points to Gryffindor house," she said with a soft smile. All three of their faces lit up.
"Thank you Professor!" exclaimed Ron. He had never been the only one of the group to earn a large number of points.
"Now off you go to the great hall. The sorting will be beginning soon. Ah! Here come the first years now!" The three looked around to see Hagrid lead them up the stairs. He looked extremely distraught, but he broke out in a broad grin when he saw the three of them. He leapt up the stairs and enveloped them all in a great hug, much to McGonagall's quiet amusement.
"Oh 'Arry! Hermione! Ron! I thought you were...I saw a carriage explode, an' I thought 'how many students are there in the school at risk of bein' murdered?'" He released them, and with a look from McGonagall, straightened up. He brushed a tear out of his eye. "What 'appened?" Harry smiled up at his friend.
"We'll tell you later. I think Professor McGonagall wants us to go inside." Hagrid gave McGonagall a disapproving look, clearing thinking that this was important enough to make the sorting ceremony wait a minute more. McGonagall must have agreed because she related the story to him quickly, adding at the end that Ron had earned a hundred points.
"A muggle explosive? This could get worse fellas," Hagrid proclaimed. "A magical explosive can be detected, but a muggle one can't, 'cause there ain't no magic 't detect." McGonagall cleared her throat. "Ahem. Ah...yes. Well, I'm glad to hear that you're safe for now. See you tomorrow then." The three of them said goodbye to Hagrid and walked into the great hall behind the crowd of first years that McGonagall lead, taking their seats at Gryffindor table.
The sorting ceremony went as planned. Harry found that he cared less and less about the new first years each year. He didn't really have any contact at all with anyone below fourth year, except for young Gryffindors who hung out in the common room. Nevertheless, he clapped enthusiastically for each new Gryffindor, and politely for new members of the other three houses, ignoring glares from some people who really didn't like Slytherins. As he did every year, Dumbledore tapped his glass and in seconds there was not a sound uttered. Harry wondered if it was merely the amount of respect her carried that got him such stunning co-operation, or if maybe he had some other means. When he spoke, his voice was just as strong as ever; stronger, indeed, than it had been last year, when he had both Voldemort and the ministry to contend with.
"Second year and up, welcome back. I hope you've all had memorable summers. And first years, welcome, welcome to your new home away from home.
"As you all now know, Voldemort-" there was a great deal of gasping, but not as much as there had been the first time he mentioned the name, at the end of forth year. "-has undeniably returned. My good friend Alastor Moody has suggested that I urge constant vigilance this year. These are darkening times, and we need to work together. United, we stand. Alone, we fall. Therefore, this year points will be awarded generously to students from different houses who work together on assignments, four times as many if it is between Gryffindor and Slytherin." There was some excited whispering at this statement.
"As usual, the Forbidden Forest is both a forest and forbidden. Many things lurk there, not least of which may be dark wizards, giant man-eating spiders, and nettles. Nobody likes nettle stings, and unfortunately there is no remedy; if you get stung, you'll just have to live with it." Some students chuckled, but most whispered about what he had said. Never before had anyone ever revealed to them exactly what was in there.
"Or caretaker Filch has asked me to remind you all that all Weasley Wizarding Wheezes merchandise is banned-" there was a collective groan from most of the school. "Except for after qudditch matches, when certain pre-approved items may be used," he said with a twinkle in his eyes. There was a short cheer. Filch just growled from the wall he was leaning on.
"As most of you already know, there was an explosion in one of the carriages. I assure you all that this is not normal. It has never happened before, and it will never happen again, thanks to magical protection spells I myself will be presently putting on each carrige. Thankfully, no one was injured. Professor McGonagall has told me that Ron Weasley saved the life of fellow prefect Hermione Granger by leaping out of the window in a daring stunt of bravery, the signature quality of Gryffindor house. As of such, he as earned his house one hundred points." There was a massive roar from Gryffindor table and a polite applause from Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw tables. Nothing but glares from Slytherin, though. Ron went completely red as he blushed furiously and tried to hide his face. "May this be incentive for the other houses to work together to earn enough points to catch up, as it will be very difficult to do so otherwise.
"And lastly, I would like to introduce our new defence against the dark arts teacher-" He turned to the door beside the staff table, and the whole school held it's breath. "Nymphadora Tonks." Dumbledore began to clap, and the whole school followed suit. Nobody noticed Malfoy's look of shock. It died down after several seconds when she did not appear. He coughed and repeated himself, starting the clapping up again. It died down when nothing happened. Cursing could be heard from behind the door. "Nymphadora? Is everything alright in there?" Dumbledore asked with amusement.
The door opened and Tonks strode out with her black robes billowing behind her. Her hair was now a deep blue and was tied in a braid that reached down to her lower back.
She smiled and walked over to the staff table. "AH!" She tripped over her long robes as she was climbing the lone stair to her seat and landed flat on her face. She whimpered to herself about how her entrance was ruined. Snape cast an amused grin her way, looking down at her. She glared at him. "Care to help me up Serverus? Believe me, I wouldn't ask, but you're the nearest to me." Snape looked at her hand and sighed. He took it and hoisted her up, a surprising achievement considering he didn't rise from his seat. Tonks gathered as much dignity as she could and sat down between Snape and Flitwick.
"That having been said, I assure you all that she is a competent teacher, and you will learn much from her this year." Seamus Finnigan raised his hand. "Yes Mr. Finnigan?"
"She's not evil is she?" There was a lot of loud laughter at this remark. Not least of which was from Flitwick and Dumbledore. Even McGonagall was chuckling.
"I understand your concerns. No, she is not evil, and I trust her completely. I'm also aware that I trusted the fake Professor Moody in the same way, but I have safely established beyond doubt that this is the real Nymphadora Tonks, and that she is not evil. In fact, she is a talented junior auror, more adept at fighting dark wizards than most of the staff. Now, let the feast begin!"
The food appeared on the plates and everyone ate until they were stuffed. Ron was the hero of the day, and was the centre of attention for once. Harry was glad for his friend, and happy that he could just be on the sidelines.
The feast ended, and it was up to Hermione to show the first year Gryffindors to their dorms. Harry was one of the last people there. He heard loud voices from behind the staff exit. He strode cautiously over to it and put his ear up to it.
"It could even be described as negligence!"
"Please professor, I'm sorry! The bomb wasn't detected by my scans! I-I didn't think about muggle means-"
"As an auror, you should have thought of that! Harry could have died! Not to mention his friends! I'm disappointed in you Nymphadora..." A silence. "No, no I take that back. Nobody thought to check for muggle devices, not even I. I'm sorry. I am reacting so strongly because Harry is dear to me, and I take his safety seriously."
"I understand Albus, I do. I'll make a point of checking for non-magical dangers in future."
"Good. As will I, and the rest of the staff. Perhaps I should take into consideration making muggle studies mandatory? Hmm...this bothers me. Voldemort hates everything about muggles. He also hates hipocrites, so I find it hard to believe he would resort to muggle means to do anything... I will investigate this. If you'll excuse me, I must return to my office and speak to the minister. I will see you tomorrow."
The door opened and Harry jumped back. Dumbledore smiled at him and just walked past. Harry peered into the room. He saw Tonks leaning against the far wall with one hand covering her eyes. Harry moved closer. He could imagine how she must be feeling. Hearing Dumbledore speak so strongly against you was a terrible thing to happen. He wanted to speak to her to let her know he didn't hold her responsible in the slightest. Near as he was, she didn't seem to notice he was there. He got right up in front of her and reached out to tap he shoulder. She chose then to open her eyes and remove her hand. She leapt suddenly in fright, startled to see two green eyes where she expected to find nothing. Her head hit a shelf directly above her very hard. This caused a small cauldron to roll off and fall right on Harry's head with a thud, whereapon it clattered to the floor with a lond clang and rolled away. He swayed side to side briefly before falling forward. Tonks tried to catch him, but was unprepared for his weight, and was knocked backwards. Her head hit the wall and she slumped to the ground with Harry's head laying snugly in her lap, face down.