"Legolas, m-maybe we should go," Milo said nervously, tugging on his arm. "I just remembered a much better place and..."
Legolas stared around. "No. I like it here." He waved to the girl behind the counter, who looked strangely familiar. She waved back and smiled. (Don't you all just love cameos?)
"Please," Milo begged, still tugging doggedly at Legolas's arm. He suddenly had an idea as he glanced at the coffee machine. Letting go of Legolas's arm, he hollered hysterically, "OH MY GOD! THE BEAN ROASTER'S ON FIRE!"
Panic-stricken, nearly the whole of Starbucks© wheeled around to see absolutely nothing, but it gave Milo time enough to shove Legolas out the door. Legolas didn't have time to protest loudly until they got in the car.
"Why did you do that?" he whined.
"Because you and caffeine don't mix."
"I thought I drank coffee."
"Which has caffeine in it."
Legolas folded his arms. "You're no fun."
"I would show you how much I care," Milo said, bending over the steering wheel, "if it was a visible amount."
"So where are we supposed to eat?"
Milo sat back, turning a corner and thinking a moment. "Wendy's©," he said finally.
A few minutes later, Legolas concluded that he did not like Wendy's©, despite the fact that the frosties were very good. Needless to say, Milo made certain Legolas did not get chocolate.
Legolas did not like Wendy's© for various reasons. A. There was lots of grease. B. There was no lembas. C. It was a hideous color and D. There was no lembas.
"Why can't we go somewhere with lembas?" Legolas asked.
"Because normal people don't eat lembas, much less have entire restaurants dedicated to it."
"Oh." Legolas bit tentatively into his burger. He chewed thoughtfully, then, screwing up his face, he put it down and swallowed, grimacing.
"What's wrong with it?"
"It spat on me."
"That was grease."
"Oh. Well, it still was not something I enjoyed. Food shouldn't squirt on you."
"Eat your fries then."
"Do I have to?"
"If you don't want to starve, you do."
Legolas huffed. "Fine." He picked up a fry. He ate it. This time, he did not grimace. "These are good. Like lembas, only fried."
"Good, good. Just eat them and don't talk about lembas anymore, please."
Legolas shrugged and shoved a handful of fries into his mouth.
"No, no! You don't eat them like that!" Milo hissed, preventing Legolas from repeating the same action. "One or two at a time, please!"
"Well, you could have told me."
"I thought you were smart enough to figure it out. I can't be your keeper all the time." Milo shook his head, taking a bite out of his burger. He gazed out the window for a bit. "Would you like to go down to the River?"
"River? Like with boats?"
"What else, smarty?"
"Well, things could be very different here, and they are, so I thought it best not to assume."
"Do you want to go or not?"
"Sure."
The Arch's intimidating 630-or-so feet towered above the shimmering waters of the Mississippi and the huge flight of concrete steps on the shore. As Legolas attempted to stare up at it, he managed to give himself a headache. "I'm getting sick of the city," he said to Milo. "I think I'll go home." Legolas quickly hurried off for a tree while Milo made no real attempt to follow him.
Perching precariously on a rather flimsy branch, Legolas sang "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun", knocking himself to the ground, making several people stare. He sat, spread-eagle and dazed, for a moment before saying oddly, "It didn't work."
Suddenly, a crazed, drug-addict-looking man dashed up, pointing a gun straight at Legolas's head.
"I know you busted me! Now the cops are after me and it's all your fault!" The crazed, drug-addict-looking man pulled the trigger on the gun, and it went off with a furious bang.
Legolas stared around. "No. I like it here." He waved to the girl behind the counter, who looked strangely familiar. She waved back and smiled. (Don't you all just love cameos?)
"Please," Milo begged, still tugging doggedly at Legolas's arm. He suddenly had an idea as he glanced at the coffee machine. Letting go of Legolas's arm, he hollered hysterically, "OH MY GOD! THE BEAN ROASTER'S ON FIRE!"
Panic-stricken, nearly the whole of Starbucks© wheeled around to see absolutely nothing, but it gave Milo time enough to shove Legolas out the door. Legolas didn't have time to protest loudly until they got in the car.
"Why did you do that?" he whined.
"Because you and caffeine don't mix."
"I thought I drank coffee."
"Which has caffeine in it."
Legolas folded his arms. "You're no fun."
"I would show you how much I care," Milo said, bending over the steering wheel, "if it was a visible amount."
"So where are we supposed to eat?"
Milo sat back, turning a corner and thinking a moment. "Wendy's©," he said finally.
A few minutes later, Legolas concluded that he did not like Wendy's©, despite the fact that the frosties were very good. Needless to say, Milo made certain Legolas did not get chocolate.
Legolas did not like Wendy's© for various reasons. A. There was lots of grease. B. There was no lembas. C. It was a hideous color and D. There was no lembas.
"Why can't we go somewhere with lembas?" Legolas asked.
"Because normal people don't eat lembas, much less have entire restaurants dedicated to it."
"Oh." Legolas bit tentatively into his burger. He chewed thoughtfully, then, screwing up his face, he put it down and swallowed, grimacing.
"What's wrong with it?"
"It spat on me."
"That was grease."
"Oh. Well, it still was not something I enjoyed. Food shouldn't squirt on you."
"Eat your fries then."
"Do I have to?"
"If you don't want to starve, you do."
Legolas huffed. "Fine." He picked up a fry. He ate it. This time, he did not grimace. "These are good. Like lembas, only fried."
"Good, good. Just eat them and don't talk about lembas anymore, please."
Legolas shrugged and shoved a handful of fries into his mouth.
"No, no! You don't eat them like that!" Milo hissed, preventing Legolas from repeating the same action. "One or two at a time, please!"
"Well, you could have told me."
"I thought you were smart enough to figure it out. I can't be your keeper all the time." Milo shook his head, taking a bite out of his burger. He gazed out the window for a bit. "Would you like to go down to the River?"
"River? Like with boats?"
"What else, smarty?"
"Well, things could be very different here, and they are, so I thought it best not to assume."
"Do you want to go or not?"
"Sure."
The Arch's intimidating 630-or-so feet towered above the shimmering waters of the Mississippi and the huge flight of concrete steps on the shore. As Legolas attempted to stare up at it, he managed to give himself a headache. "I'm getting sick of the city," he said to Milo. "I think I'll go home." Legolas quickly hurried off for a tree while Milo made no real attempt to follow him.
Perching precariously on a rather flimsy branch, Legolas sang "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun", knocking himself to the ground, making several people stare. He sat, spread-eagle and dazed, for a moment before saying oddly, "It didn't work."
Suddenly, a crazed, drug-addict-looking man dashed up, pointing a gun straight at Legolas's head.
"I know you busted me! Now the cops are after me and it's all your fault!" The crazed, drug-addict-looking man pulled the trigger on the gun, and it went off with a furious bang.