Title: Twilight
Author: T'eyla
AN: Thanks to Gabi2305 (nichts geht über signed reviews - ja, und Dornröschen und ihr/sein Prinz dürfen auch bald wieder heim gehen g), Exploded Pen (isn't it always like that - two people like each other, but they both JUST DON'T GET IT! g), KaliedescopeCat (oh yes, there is... a little snuggling with the cutest Chief Engineer on Enterprise - which isn't saying much for they only have one -ducks as Trip fans throw rotten vegetables-), pris (here's the early update for you :) ), WhtevrHpnd2Mary (nothing wrong with a little romance...), Phaser Lady (uh... I guess I have to disappoint you... you expect too much from those two poor guys just now, I'm afraid ;) ) and Andrea (let's get down to business - hell, yeah! Didn't think of that one! ;) - und sorry, soviel kommt hier nicht mehr... für ein Songfic ist es ohnehin viel zu lang. Aber Nummer 2 ist in Arbeit - mehr oder weniger ;) ) for reviewing. Okay, second to last chapter. A short one again - but hey, you're getting daily updates, don't complain! -g-
Chorus/Bridge
The next one and more than half an hour passed in more or less complete silence. Trip found it quite astonishing that they wouldn't want to talk about what they'd just discovered, but he realized that it might be better to postpone any further conversation about the matter until a later occasion. Maybe when they weren't freezing their butts off in some underground cave on an alien planet and Malcolm wasn't only half-aware of what was going on around him due to the pain in his broken leg. Trip sincerely hoped that the earlier revelation hadn't simply been pain-induced delusional talking, but he didn't think so. It had seemed like Malcolm meant what he'd been saying.
Yeah 'cause I'm missing you,
Just like you know I do,
You made me trip into the grind
Now I can't get you off
Trip had quite a collection of mixed feelings about what had happened before, and sitting on the cold rock of the cave's bottom, he had enough time to contemplate on them. On the one hand, he was happy. Happier than he ever remembered being, and he realized that his feelings for Malcolm must go beyond a simple crush, or plain attraction, that he might actually have fallen for the man. This surprised him, he'd never before felt anything for a man, not as far as he could remember, and he had only seldom felt so strongly for anyone. If ever.
But aside from the happy sensation of bliss that spread in him when he'd realized Malcolm felt similar like he did, he was utterly confused. His kiss, the spontaneous reaction to what he'd seen in Malcolm's eyes, had initiated this, but he didn't know if "this" was right. Only about an hour ago he'd come to the conclusion that a relationship with Malcolm could only go wrong, due to the situation they were in. Now, that situation hadn't changed, and what was to be concluded from it was still the same as well. But every time he thought of telling Malcolm about it, of saying "sorry buddy, but this won't work out" and leaving it at that, something in him protested so loudly it almost hurt. He wanted this, and he didn't know for sure, but he even thought he needed this. And he simply didn't know what to do.
And the more I try
Leads to the same old why
You made me trip into the grind
Now I can't get you off of my mind
He didn't say anything when Jon and the others finally came and got them out of there. Somewhere along the way Malcolm had slipped away into unconsciousness, so Trip couldn't talk to him either. He simply acted his normal self and tried to keep everyone oblivious of his confusion. But acting wasn't Trip's strong side, and after a while - more precisely, as soon as Malcolm had safely arrived in sickbay and the commotion of the rescue mission had quieted down, Jon took Trip aside.
"Is there something wrong, Trip? You seem... distracted."
For a moment Trip considered simply dismissing Jon's question, but he knew that he wouldn't be able to get his feelings straightened out all by himself. Getting his feelings straightened out was something he'd never been very good at. "I guess..." He cleared his throat. "There's something I need to tell you. At length. Tomorrow, at breakfast?"
Jon nodded. "Alright. 0900, don't be late."
"Be there."
TBC...
Please let me know what you think!