Author's*Note—All right, guys—I've been on vacation, but I'm back and I've brought a new chapter with me…R & R…enjoy!
Chapter 5: Not So Easy
"Now, class, if you'll all be patient for a few minutes, I'd like to hand back your last homework," chirped tiny Professor Flitwick, who, as usual, was speaking to the class from atop about 5 good sized books.
"Oh, yes!" Sirius enthused, looking quite cheery.
"Were you snogging someone while completing this homework or something?" Remus questioned dryly.
"No, Moony, I can't mix school with my social life. It really would be too much for me to be brilliant in the company of a female. I multitask as it is, what with being charming and handsome."
"I can see how you wouldn't want to strain yourself."
"Really, though, Padfoot, why all the enthusiasm?" James questioned from his other side.
"I did excellent on this homework, I'm sure of it. I spent a whole……like 20 minutes working on it."
"I'm sure the effort is evident." Remus quipped.
"Yeah, Padfoot, I'll bet Flitwick gave you a BMM."
Sirius raised an eyebrow questioningly.
"A 'Blew My Mind'."
Remus chuckled softly as Sirius's expression closed into a scowl.
"You lot will see when I get my very first O for the year."
"I don't know about you, but I'm on the edge of my seat." Remus murmured to James, who let out a muffled laugh.
Sirius, who had always been known for his rather flighty personality, didn't even seem to mind the comment, for he had already moved on to bigger and better topics of discussion.
"Adalia looks nice today, doesn't she?"
"I wouldn't know. I'm not looking at her." James, whose eyes were firmly planted on the laughing form of Lily Evans across the room, responded.
"Prongs, just because the girl engaged in a 6 minute conversation with you over 2 weeks ago, doesn't mean she now has a head full of wedding dresses and James Jr.'s."
"Padfoot, it wasn't just that. It was...well, that was the first conversation we had that actually meant something. We understood each other. We looked right into each other's eyes.."
Sirius turned his head toward Remus, interrupting James's idealistic reminiscing. "Hey, Moony, you know Filch looked me in the eye the other day when he caught me trying to convince Mrs. Norris to eat a dungbomb. You think I should send him roses?"
"You're such a git." James commented with a shake of his head and a disapproving glare.
"Although, I was thinking that the fact that he called me a 'foolish, conniving little toe rag' afterward discredited it a bit."
Remus grinned, but suppressed a laugh, so as not to discourage James.
"I agree with you, James. You made your first little step toward a relationship with her." Remus nodded agreeably as he said this.
James's eyebrows furrowed as a slightly disheartened look appeared on his face.
"How is this only my first little step? What exactly was I doing before?!"
"Crawling…in the opposite direction." Sirius clarified.
James allowed his head to fall into his hands and rest there for a few minutes. He didn't mind slow progress, but this was ridiculous.
"All right," he finally spoke up, "what do I do now?"
"You have to make a connection. Find some sort of reason as to why Lily should even consider you as a friend."
"Well, we have lots of things in common! I mean, she's very pretty and I'm…well, ask any girl around here and I'm sure she'd tell you I'm not too bad on the eyes. She's smart…I'm smart. A lot of people like her…and I think it's pretty obvious that I'm not a social misfit."
Sirius let out a small, derisive laugh. "You plan on going up to her and telling her all those things, Prongs?"
"Well, I don't know."
"That'll get you a connection, all right. Her fist will connect with your face."
James groaned and pounded (rather lightly, though) on their table with his fist.
"Prongs, doesn't the little voice in your head ever chant 'git' at you?" Remus questioned, his voice dripping with frustrated patience.
"See, I just don't understand what's so wrong about me. I mean—what did I just say that was so bad?" James asked meekly.
"James, what do I have to do to get through to you?? Should I speak very slowly and bring pictures next time?"
"Let's just face it, Moony, I'm a hopeless case." James folded his arms together and laid his head into the space in between them.
As James sulked, Remus's eyes took advantage of the break in conversation and scanned the room, hoping for some inspiration. He needed to find a way that James could learn more about Lily without actually…interacting with her. As far as he was concerned, it was too soon for James to be speaking to her without the supervision of at least 3 other people. After a few minutes of searching fruitlessly, boredom took over and he allowed his eyes to simply follow Flitwick around the room as he passed back their homework. It was as he was handing Lola Sommers a roll of parchment that Remus's eyes lit up and a few puzzle pieces joined together in his brain.
"Her friends."
"Moony, your speaking randomly again." Sirius informed in a bored tone of voice.
"James, you get to know Lily through her friends. Ask them about her…find out what she likes and what she doesn't like and what her favorite food is and--."
"..what color her knickers are…" Sirius added.
"Padfoot, don't speak until directly spoken to for now, okay?"
"Well, you said all that stuff like James would actually care if Lily doesn't like pine cones or something. I'm the one who has his best interests at heart."
Remus chose to ignore that last comment. "Can you do that without further explanation, Prongs?"
James lifted his head up. "Yeah, I can do that. What if they don't know some things, though?"
"Well, if they can't do her knickers then you can always move on to other undergarments. I mean, there's no need to be so specific." Sirius rationalized.
Remus, once again, ignored him. "Girls know practically everything about each other. You should be able to at least get the basics."
"You won't get bored talking to them, either. Her friends are pretty cute." Sirius added in helpfully.
James sighed and combed his figures through his hair nervously. Seconds later, he pulled them out and laid his hands down on the table. Ever since he had observed Chrysanthea grooming herself in such a similar fashion, he had been trying to wean himself of the habit.
"Let's just hope they're friendly."
*
"Oh, and she just loves jello!"
James nodded his head, a satisfied smile playing on his lips as he wrote the word "jello" onto the sheet of parchment in front of him. It was divided into three columns: likes, dislikes, and miscellaneous information. It was 2 weeks after his exchange with Remus and Sirius and he had finally managed to corner Lily's friends and plead for their assistance. It hadn't been too hard to convince them, given that the three of them would be delighted for Lily to gave him a chance.
"That's good, but, would you girls mind mentioning more dislikes? I don't have any of those yet."
"Well," Cecilia drawled, "first and foremost, there's you."
James blinked a few times before fully comprehending this information.
"Yes, well, let's just consider that one a work in progress."
Nevertheless, he bent his head down and began to scrawl the word "me" into the dislikes column. Then, as an afterthought, he moved his hand over to miscellaneous information and added "is either crazy or blind" to that section.
"Proceed."
"Well, Lily's a very benevolent person. There isn't much that she really dislikes." Leila admitted.
"Other than you." Cecilia added quickly.
"That's lovely." James deadpanned.
"Oh, I know! Lily hates Divination. She thinks it's nothing but a load of dung." Lola piped up.
James's eyes lit up. "There! A common dislike! I knew that there would eventually be something that we had in common! C'mon, ladies, let's keep the ball rolling."
"She once told me that she prefers blue eyes on a guy." Cecilia reported.
"So…what? Am I supposed to charm my eyes blue?"
"There's an idea! If you really want to get to know her, you could disguise yourself as a different person, so that she'll be able to get to know you without any presumptions or biases." Leila's eyes twinkled merrily at the brilliance of such a plan.
"I don't think Lily would like that. She already thinks I'm an arrogant git. I don't want her to add deceitful to the front of that."
"You could tell her you were dying. I'm sure she'd begin a relationship with you as long as she knew it would expire in the near future." Cecilia deduced in what she thought was a helpful manner.
"Then what would happen when I never died?"
Cecilia raised her eyebrows at him. "You can't expect us to sort out every little detail for you."
James shook his head and took a deep breath. "All right, girls. No more thinking about how I'm going to fake my own death or change my identity. Back to the list. Focus."
Leila reclined back in the chair she was sitting in and narrowed her eyes in concentration.
"James, why don't you just focus on being a better person…and then see how things go from there."
Lola grinned. "Why, Lei, that's an excellent plan. Cecilia, what do you think?"
"Brilliant!" She chirped.
"So, basically, you're telling me to do this on my own."
"If you really want to change, it has to be you who works at it. You need to motivate yourself. You reach goals by working hard. Think of Lily as the Quidditch Cup. Can you get the Cup if your team just sits around all season and does nothing?" Lola questioned.
"Well, no, you have to have practices at least 3 times a week and-."
"Exactly. Now go draw up a game plan, Captain." Lola stood up, patted James on the back, then made her way over to the staircase that led to the girls' dormitories.
"See you, James." Cecilia waved.
"Good luck." Leila wished him with a broad smile.
James slumped back into his chair, deep in thought. Okay, he was on his own now, but was that such a bad thing? For one, he thought he finally understood the changing process that Remus had been trying to explain to him for months. Not only that, but he had a feeling that he could actually pull it off.
*
"Yes, Mr. Potter?"
Minerva McGonagall lowered her spectacles as she wearily eyed James.
"Well, Professor, I was thinking today."
"A very astonishing accomplishment for you."
"Exactly, Professor…that's why I came to you…because you care about your students enough to notice and compliment such an effort. I have this idea and because you're such a supportive, caring administrator, I thought that you would not only think it was brilliant, but possibly also forgive Sirius and I for transfiguring all your 2nd year homework parchments into rats last June."
"Very little phases me, Mr. Potter, but I must say that looking down at my desk to observe a swarm of rats congregating next to my ink bottle is one of them."
"All right, well that's understandable, but anyway, as I was saying..I was just thinking about all of the potential that lies within the very soul of each and every Hogwarts student."
"You are not organizing any type of club that encourages your peers to exhibit the kind of behavior that you and Mr. Black think of as routine." She quickly informed him.
"Oh—no, no, no..I mean, yes—a club, but--."
"Potter, you're not exactly what I think of as leadership material."
"—less pranking and more..learning." James fixed his eyes on her and held her steady gaze, trying to make her understand that he was being sincere.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Potter, but I'm afraid I really can't place that kind of responsibility upon your shoulders. You are certainly more than adept to tutor your peers—that is what you meant, correct? (James nodded agreeably)—but you are sorely lacking in reliability..and in motive."
"Motive?" James spoke the word as if it was distasteful for it to roll over his tongue.
"It's not every day that a student requires a personal meeting with me so as to discuss their role in the educational futures of their peers."
James lifted his hands in protest, but then thought better of it and set them down in his lap. He often talked with his hands, but now was a time to be respectful instead of casual.
"Listen, Professor. I've noticed some things about myself that I don't really care for too much and I'd like to make a few changes. I know you may not know this, but some people consider me somewhat……conceited (this was another word that appeared to leave a bad taste in James's mouth), if you can believe that—I know it came as a shock to me—and I think that becoming a tutor could be the first step in…er…caring more about others."
"Even if you do have a suitable reason, Mr. Potter, which, may I add, you don't fully have, you're still lacking my other requirement. I'm not sure that I'd be able to sleep at night if I placed a number of my students in your rugged hands."
James's voice became defensive as he remarked, "Hey, Professor, now I'll admit that I don't moisturize or anything, but my hands are actually quite nice--."
"Potter, I wasn't being literal. I merely meant to insinuate that you aren't the most caring, thoughtful student at this school."
James grinned at this. "That is exactly why I will be enlisting the help of the most caring, thoughtful student at this school. Or at least begging for it."
"..and who, may I ask, do you have in mind?"
James cleared his throat. "Lily Evans."
Her eyebrows drew together and lifted, James's latest comment complimenting her already suspicious nature.
"Potter, Miss. Evans and yourself haven't gotten along since you met each other. I severely doubt that she will agree to be your…partner."
James's pointer finger was waggling at her before he could even realize the action, giving him little time to correct it. "You see, that's where you're wrong. From what I gather when it comes to Lily, the chance at enriching the life of someone else is quite her cup of pumpkin juice."
"Pumpkin juice, Mr. Potter?"
"Well, she doesn't like tea. I'm fairly sure that was the one that came right after me on her dislikes list. Yes, it was either that or boiled hot dogs."
Professor McGonagall eyed him, her glance still perturbed, for a few silent minutes. Then, she heaved a sigh and folded her hands in front of her upon her desk.
"Potter, as regretful as I know I am bound to be in the future, I'm afraid I can't deny a student the chance to help others. If you are really sincere in your wishes to tutor your fellow students, which you appear to be, I will give you my consent in forming a…tutoring club."
James's mouth expanded into a huge grin. "Thank you very much, Professor. I will put all that I have into this, I promise you."
"For now, Mr. Potter, I suggest you put all that you have into convincing Miss. Evans to be your partner in all of this, because that happens to be my one condition. You do this with Miss. Evans keeping an eye on you at all times, or you don't do it at all."
"I wouldn't have it any other way, Professor."
*
James found Lily stretched out in a chair in the common room, a book propped up in her lap. Grinning, he crept up behind her, kneeled down, and rested his head on the arm of the chair.
"Whatcha readin'?"
Lily let out a small squeal and jumped a little in her seat. When she turned to find James at her side, an annoyed expression appeared on her face.
"Potter." She sighed in welcome.
"Hi, Lily." He shot her his most benign smile.
"Is there something that you need?" She raised her eyebrows at him.
James reached out his hand and traced a finger down her cheek. "Well, now that you put it that way…"
Lily kept her unflinching glare fixed on him, seemingly entirely not amused by his antics.
"…OK, wrong approach with that one."
She sighed again.
"I like you a lot more when you're mouth isn't open."
"Why must you be so hot and cold with me, Lily, dear?"
She allowed a sickly sweet smile to play on her lips. "…because, James, darling, sometimes you seem to be acting like a normal, perfectly tolerable person…and then other times, you're an insensitive prat!"
James thought for a moment. "All right, how about we just get to the point?"
"What a wonderful idea."
"Lily, I've been thinking."
"Astonishing."
James was momentarily distracted. "You know, you should only have to get that kind of response once a day. The first time—OK, kind of funny. After that, though, it's just…mean."
Lily's eyebrows furrowed. Lovely—he had confused her.
"Nevermind." James dismissed it with a wave of his hand.
Lily nodded, despite the fact that she was still a little bit confused.
"Lily, I need your help."
Now, that did the trick. She was intrigued.
"Go on."
"I want to be a better person."
Lily's eyes widened. "…and you want my help because?"
He shrugged and answered simply, "You're the best person I know."
Lily's head tilted to one side a bit, her expression softening. "That was…"
"The nicest thing anyone's ever said to you?" James guessed hopefully.
She smiled, her eyes twinkling. "Actually, no, but it was nice…for you."
"You see? You're here and I'm already on the right track." He grinned.
Her smile faded into a more serious countenance. "James, that's very flattering, but..changing like that…it's really something you should do more so on…on your own."
"Yeah, I know…I plan to do that. It's just that…well, I decided that it would be a good idea for me to tutor younger students. I figured it would keep me focused more on my schoolwork and help me to become more alert of others' feelings. "
Lily nodded in agreement, so he decided to move along in the conversation.
"You see, Professor McGonagall won't let me do it unless someone responsible does it with me and--."
"Wait…what? Are you…are you—are you serious?"
Now, it was his turn to be confused. "Well, yeah, I mean--."
Lily shook her head in an irritated fashion and it puzzled James to observe that she seemed…infuriated.
"I should've known."
"Lily, I-."
"JAMES POTTER YOU ARE THE MOST SELFISH PERSON ON THIS PLANET! You don't want my help, I can see that. You just want to use me in one of you're little schemes. Well, guess what?! I'm not an idiot and I won't go along with it. Find someone else to be your puppet, you git!"
Lily stood up out of her chair and stormed off in the direction of the steps that led to the 6th year girls' dormitory.
"Lily, that is the most RIDICULOUS thing I've ever heard. Do you think you could just trust me for once?!" James yelled as he chased after her. He was so intent on catching up with her that he didn't give a second thought to running up the steps afterward. Within seconds, he found himself sliding back down to the ground with an unpleasant thud.
Brushing himself off as he stood up, he muttered to himself, "Honestly, you never see the girls get bruised for trying to come up to our room."
"Well, mate, I reckon that's because their lot is perfectly welcome up there." A voice said from behind him.
James turned around to see Sirius grinning in pure amusement. Behind him, lounging in chairs, were Peter and Remus.
"I see you're making excellent progress on your own." Remus commented lightly, smirking in James's direction.
"Ah, bugger off!" James scowled as he made his way up to his dormitory.
Why he thought this would be easy, he had no idea. When it came to Lily Evans, things were never easy.
*
"Lil, do me a favor and remind me how you managed to convince me into taking the N.E.W.T class for History of Magic…" Leila ordered, a slight wince in her voice as she unrolled the foot long piece of parchment Professor Binns had handed her moments earlier and was greeted with a clearly visible D.
Lily offered her a patient smile. "Because, Lei, you want your future employer to see how expansive your interests are."
"I seriously doubt that my future employer would care about such qualities, unless, say..my future employer was you."
"Are you implying that I forced you into taking this class?"
"Oh, you know very well that giving your little 'we have to think about our futures' speech is just as good as putting the Imperius Curse on all of us."
"Still, though, it's not like I put a gun to your head."
Leila raised her eyebrows in a curious fashion. "What would it matter if you put gum on my head? I mean, sure it might get in my hair and then force me to possibly shave my head, but something like that wouldn't have made me follow you into the N.E.W.T class from hell..if anything, it would've made me follow you around with scissors and a razor."
"As much thought as you put into that answer, I feel obligated to tell you that I said 'gun', not 'gum'."
"Who's Gun?"
"It's not a who, it's a what..and it is a..um…muggle weapon." Lily attempted to explain.
"Ohhhh...you mean like those…numb chucks!"
"You mean nun chucks?"
"Yeah, those!"
Lily let out a short laugh.
Leila looked slightly put out that her comparison wasn't as clever as she'd thought it would be.
"What?"
"Well, yeah, they're a weapon—if you're a ninja!"
"What's a ninja?"
Lily opened her mouth, then thought better of it and responded briefly, "Never mind."
Leila didn't seem to mind, for she changed the subject without missing a beat.
"So, what'd you get on the essay, anyway?"
Lily looked hesitant. "I did……fair."
Eyeing Lily's essay suspiciously, Leila quickly snatched it off the table as Lily lunged desperately for it.
"Lei, give it back!"
Leila ignored her, and instead busied herself with the task of unrolling the 2 ft long piece of parchment. Her eyes widened as a small gasp was emitted from her lips. "Fair?? FAIR?! Lily, you got an O!"
"Well, I was trying to make you feel better, as you would've noticed if you weren't so bloody nosey!"
"Lil, I know you're brilliant, you don't have to bother hiding you're exemplary marks from us less fortunate people."
"Please, Leila. You're not an idiot and you know that I wouldn't think that for a second!"
"I don't need praise. I know I'm not Head Girl material…and I know that I suck in this class."
"Honestly, Lei, all you have to do is apply yourself a bit more."
"Lily, I honestly don't know how it's possible to apply anything in this class. I've spent the majority of my most dreadfully boring hours in this classroom. I mean, even if I sleep in here, I end up having boring dreams. It's a big waste of my time."
"That one you had the other day when you whispered 'Reeeeeemus' didn't sound quite so dull…" Lily chirped, innocently examining her nails.
Leila's face immediately turned a brilliant shade of red.
"Oh, I suppose it was as entertaining as it sounded…"
Leila's eyes narrowed as she hissed, "You're making that up."
Lily turned toward her, her eyes sparkling wickedly. "Yes, possibly, but even so you wouldn't be looking like a strawberry right now if it weren't for the fact that he has, indeed, been running a few laps in here."
She tapped the side of her head softly for emphasis, her grin spreading quickly.
"..and how exactly are you so sure of that?"
Lily sighed in a somewhat dramatic fashion. "Lei, I can read you like a book..and Remus is quite the page turner these days."
Leila crossed her arms defiantly, while quickly searching her mind for a jab of her own.
"At least I'm not infatuated with James Potter."
Lily's eyes widened considerably, her face bearing a disgraced expression. "That is the most preposterous thing I have ever heard in my life."
Leila shrugged. "Painfully honest, I know."
Lily fixed her eyes angrily upon her friend, staring her down silently for a few moments before deciding on a better tact.
She let out a small breath before turning calmly to Leila and stating airily, "You are completely off."
"No, I don't think so. You're just in complete denial."
Frustrated that her calm approach hadn't worked, Lily quickly began to fume again, fully ready to get into a full-fledged argument over such a…a…completely not true, off base, disgusting, horrible-to-even-think-about statement.
"Explain yourself." She muttered shortly.
"I'm just saying that James is smart, that's all."
"You're getting even more delusional by the minute."
"Don't you see, Lily? By annoying the hell out of you all these years, he's done something that he's been wishing for since 4th year."
"..and what, Miss. All Knowing, would that be?"
"He's made himself the center of your world."
Lily looked livid. "HE IS NOT!"
Leila grinned, her eyes twinkling mischievously. "Prove it, then."
"How? Would you like me to draw a map of my world and point out that James is in uncharted territory?"
"Prove that you're not scared of getting close to him. Do that tutoring thing with him."
Lily rolled her eyes at her friend.
"Oh, c'mon, Lily."
As a means of satisfying Leila, Lily gave the most evasive answer she could.
"I'll think about it."
*
Hope you guys enjoyed..I'll try to get the next one out soon!