Chapter 1
"let me guess the guys called the showers right" Janet said as she saw Sam enter the infirmary, she had heard the incoming alert of a team coming back but no medical staff had been requested so she was just waiting to the medical checks when I very muddy, very tied looking Samantha Carter entered the infirmary.
"No, I called the infirmary, just to see your smiling face" Sam joked lightly, as she fought to remain steady on her feet,
"Oh, well here I am, let me just put some plastic on one of these beds and I'll be ready" Janet new better than to ask her out in the open what was wrong, so she just spread a plastic sheet over the bed as Sam was still despite the time she had been on base, wet and muddy from the mission.
"Just jump up here" she said as she finished noting the pain in Sam face as she did so, Sam was good at hiding it but Janet always new when she was in pain, so she started slowly.
"What seem to be problem?"
"My back," Sam almost squeaked, she cleared her throat weakly and continued "I think most of the cuts are bleeding again"
"Well you just pop off your T-Shirt of and we will take a look OK"
Janet was not happy with what she saw; every cut was indeed reopened, where Sam heavy flack jacket had been rubbing on the soaking surface,
Sam lay on her front wondering how the hell she had ended up here, she didn't want to stay she new that much, she thought back to 2 nights early when she had 'injured her back'
She lay in bed, hoping he got back soon, the earlier he was the less drunk he usually was but tonight her luck wasn't holding and it was already after one when she heard the familiar grate of the key in the door
"SAMANTHA" Came the yell, now she had a choice pretend to be asleep and hope he was so drunk he would pass out quickly before he did anything or go down and try and keep him calm. She made the wrong choice yet again, closing her eyes and trying to ignore the sound of foot steps on the stairs.
"Sammie" Came the leer from the door way
"Sammie," He almost growled as he approached the bed, shedding clothes as he went.
"Sammie," he roughly descended on to of her walking up the bed straddling her beneath the covers, she could smell his stench of alcohol and cigarettes coming off his body and breath.
She opened her eyes she new what was coming, she had been horrified the first time but now it was routine, her mind ran through her training working out ways she could get away from him, despite his more impressive black opps training and his greater strength, he was drunk and she could use that against him but she couldn't risk it, not anymore.
He took her violently with no regards for her feelings only his own satisfaction. She didn't make a sound though the pain was intense, she new better than that. 'Is this love' she asked herself.
When he was done he looked down and smiled "You know I love you Sammie, you'd do anything for me wouldn't you Sammie" he drawled
"yer, Jonas, real love" She new it had been a mistake as soon as she said it but she was still angry after years of hate, she had forgotten slipped up because of the anger she felt inside.
"GET OUT, GET OUT," he yelled shoving the still shock body from the bed and on to the floor where she sprawled as her head and back crashed to the ground unable to stop the fall on to her back, after the sudden violent thrust.
"You will sleep there, whore" he growled before he turned over to go to sleep ignoring the slender women on the floor.
She remained still for a long time, until she was certain he was deep asleep hugging herself to try and keep warm in the cold Colorado air.
When she thought he was in a deep enough sleep she crawled across the room grabbing the bag she had already set up for the morning it would not do disturb him leaving for work as he was on down time, she new there were clothes in there that she could put on once she got down stairs.
She crept downstairs and started to dress but she only had her fatigue pants on she heard the bedroom door slam, and she new she had made her second mistake of the night. He came down the stairs in a rage "how dare you disobey me, I could destroy you and your precious life, you love so much"
"I'm sorry Jonas" She tried in vain but he picked up a pint glass and threw it across the room it shattered on the wall as only missing her head because she dived onto the sofa, but the shard rained down on her unprotected back, cutting it painfully, but she lay perfectly still holding in the cry she wanted to release.
"Have a good mission" Jonas said carelessly as he went back upstairs, with no remorse in his voice, almost as if he had forgotten what he'd down or just did not consider it important.
Sam was called back from her recollection as, Janet tried to clean the wounds on her back and it stung painfully on the deeper cuts. 'Yer I had a great mission Jonas, thanks a million' she quipped in her head cursing who ever idea it had been for them to take full packs.
"Why Sam?" Janet asked softly, it was not the first time she had asked but she felt she had to keep trying
"I woke him up" Sam quipped back knowing what Janet meant but not willing to answer, with the same lies she had been using for years 'I slipped, I fell, I'm clumsy, it was my fault!'
"You know that's not what I meant, your so intelligent, you know this is wrong, stop it before even I can't put you back together again" Janet new it was harsh but she was sick of patching up her best friend, she was in the infirmary more than any other member of the base.
"I can't do it, there are things more important" Sam voice was controlled, she couldn't remember the last time she had cried, she had become numb just going through the actions of living, she suddenly recalled she had cried for Cassandra when she thought she was dying but not for herself, not anymore.
"your not alone and there is nothing more important Sam, you need to get out, whatever he has on you, its not worth it" Janet knelt beside the bed looking Sam straight in the eyes, she couldn't let this go on. "I am going to tell the rest of SG1 what he does, if you don't and you know how they will react so, if you don't want heads ripped off then I suggest you tell them, tell us why" Janet wouldn't let it continue, it was time to act.
"No, you can't, honestly Janet I'll be more careful, I stay out of here, just don't tell them" Sam almost shouted then just stared, thoughts running a million miles an hour through her head.
Janet quickly finished dressing Sam's back "I am going to tell them, you can't go on living like this, being careful doesn't stop you getting hit" She spoke softly trying not to be another threat but she had been patching Sam up for years, she even kept Sam's contraceptives in her locker so Jonas wouldn't know about them, she had tried everything, being supportive but it was time to stand up to Jonas even if Sam wouldn't her friend was so strong in every other way, she felt she had to be strong for her now.
"You've got to let me explain to them why, but I can't tell them what he does, they don't need to know" she spoke almost in a whisper, the hope Janet offered being to great to resist she new she spoke the truth maybe despite her shame they help her out of the horror story that was her current life.
"Yes, they do, they'll help you're a team you support each other"
"That's out there" she waved her arm "they can't do anything here"
"No, it where you need help, lets let them decide if they can help" Janet was surprised out how willingly Sam was to cooperate things must be getting bad. 'Getting bad' she almost laughed at herself they had been bad as long as she had known Sam, worse didn't bare thinking about though.
Daniel was just putting his boots back on when he glanced at Sam's locker next to his own. He worried, he new Jonas bullied her heed realised it as soon as he came on base. No stranger to bullies like Hanson himself. If they weren't married you'd never think of them together. Jonas had never shown Sam any love, in Daniel presence at least, he would touch her possessively but never lovingly. He remembered there first meeting in this room, by that locker
Daniel had entered the locker room with him and the rest of his team, Just as Sam as finishing up 'Sorry, I was just leaving' she muttered as she said as she stuffed her things into her locker, with none of her usual care.
'This stuff goner be a night mare to clean one of Jonas' team had complained
'You should get married mate, Sam here all clean mine for me won't you Sammie' Jonas boasted. Daniel had fully expect Sam usually sarcastic tongue or her just to ignore him, even hit him but the tiny voice that answered wasn't the women Daniel knew he would probably have been less surprised if she had grown another head.
'Sure Jonas' She then tried to slip away, but Jonas had already removed his boots and thrust violently them into Sam's chest still thick with mud staining her shirt and T-shirt,
Daniel expected this to get a reaction but she didn't even make eye contact with the man, as he leered 'Don't run away Sammie, I was talking'
'Sorry Jonas, I got to go the generals waiting' Daniel had thought he was going to hit her right there in front of everyone but as soon as the Hammond was mentioned he backed down
'Well run along dear, don't want to keep the man waiting' Daniel horrified by the whole scene he had confronted Jonas on it, only to be called a geek and to keep his nose out of it. The anger in Jonas had scared Daniel how one man could contain that much hate. The next couple of days Sam spent in the infirmary and nursing a dislocated shoulder Daniel had never mentioned it again.
That had been a long time ago now and he had seen Sam handle so much, he couldn't imagine her backing down at home and hoped what ever had brought them together in the first place was back even if they didn't show it publicly, he could almost kid himself that Sam was just accident prone and some day's she just chose to where more make up than others, almost, he could almost believe that some days.
Latter that night 3 member of SG1 sat in a unused storage room looking vaguely at there watches "So anyone know why we are here" Jack said eventually
"Doctor Frasier, merely requested my presence" Tlea'c stated flatly
"She said it was important" Daniel added
"So where is she" Jack said impatience showing in his voice.
"Right here," came the usual calm voice of Doctor Frasier
"So Doc, what's with all the clock and dagger stuff," Jack asked as she closed the door.
"This" Janet said clearly as she place a thick folder on the table
"Why is a large medical record our concern Doctor Frasier?" Tlea'c asked
"Sam's medical record, we really shouldn't see this Doc" Daniel added
"Are you not bound by patient confidentially laws"
"I allowed to inform family of her medical condition unless she has asked otherwise you have said you consider each other family, and to be honest they can hang me for all I care if you can stop this folder getting larger or worse."
Jack wasn't used to the desperation in her voice but was touched by the caring nature of her words.
"That folder, details all the beating she wasn't able to hide, the cuts, bruises and brakes inflicted, it represent little of the humiliation and pain she suffers regularly, even I don't know it all but that folder speaks volumes. I going to leave it with you for an hour, while I go and find its owner who is willing to speak to you;" 'I hope' she added slightly in her head.
Janet left quickly unwilling to watch the shock and horror when they open that folder, she had seen most of it first hand it was not pretty and Sam had been good at hiding most of it from them.
That's it for now review and I'll put another chapter up soon.
"let me guess the guys called the showers right" Janet said as she saw Sam enter the infirmary, she had heard the incoming alert of a team coming back but no medical staff had been requested so she was just waiting to the medical checks when I very muddy, very tied looking Samantha Carter entered the infirmary.
"No, I called the infirmary, just to see your smiling face" Sam joked lightly, as she fought to remain steady on her feet,
"Oh, well here I am, let me just put some plastic on one of these beds and I'll be ready" Janet new better than to ask her out in the open what was wrong, so she just spread a plastic sheet over the bed as Sam was still despite the time she had been on base, wet and muddy from the mission.
"Just jump up here" she said as she finished noting the pain in Sam face as she did so, Sam was good at hiding it but Janet always new when she was in pain, so she started slowly.
"What seem to be problem?"
"My back," Sam almost squeaked, she cleared her throat weakly and continued "I think most of the cuts are bleeding again"
"Well you just pop off your T-Shirt of and we will take a look OK"
Janet was not happy with what she saw; every cut was indeed reopened, where Sam heavy flack jacket had been rubbing on the soaking surface,
Sam lay on her front wondering how the hell she had ended up here, she didn't want to stay she new that much, she thought back to 2 nights early when she had 'injured her back'
She lay in bed, hoping he got back soon, the earlier he was the less drunk he usually was but tonight her luck wasn't holding and it was already after one when she heard the familiar grate of the key in the door
"SAMANTHA" Came the yell, now she had a choice pretend to be asleep and hope he was so drunk he would pass out quickly before he did anything or go down and try and keep him calm. She made the wrong choice yet again, closing her eyes and trying to ignore the sound of foot steps on the stairs.
"Sammie" Came the leer from the door way
"Sammie," He almost growled as he approached the bed, shedding clothes as he went.
"Sammie," he roughly descended on to of her walking up the bed straddling her beneath the covers, she could smell his stench of alcohol and cigarettes coming off his body and breath.
She opened her eyes she new what was coming, she had been horrified the first time but now it was routine, her mind ran through her training working out ways she could get away from him, despite his more impressive black opps training and his greater strength, he was drunk and she could use that against him but she couldn't risk it, not anymore.
He took her violently with no regards for her feelings only his own satisfaction. She didn't make a sound though the pain was intense, she new better than that. 'Is this love' she asked herself.
When he was done he looked down and smiled "You know I love you Sammie, you'd do anything for me wouldn't you Sammie" he drawled
"yer, Jonas, real love" She new it had been a mistake as soon as she said it but she was still angry after years of hate, she had forgotten slipped up because of the anger she felt inside.
"GET OUT, GET OUT," he yelled shoving the still shock body from the bed and on to the floor where she sprawled as her head and back crashed to the ground unable to stop the fall on to her back, after the sudden violent thrust.
"You will sleep there, whore" he growled before he turned over to go to sleep ignoring the slender women on the floor.
She remained still for a long time, until she was certain he was deep asleep hugging herself to try and keep warm in the cold Colorado air.
When she thought he was in a deep enough sleep she crawled across the room grabbing the bag she had already set up for the morning it would not do disturb him leaving for work as he was on down time, she new there were clothes in there that she could put on once she got down stairs.
She crept downstairs and started to dress but she only had her fatigue pants on she heard the bedroom door slam, and she new she had made her second mistake of the night. He came down the stairs in a rage "how dare you disobey me, I could destroy you and your precious life, you love so much"
"I'm sorry Jonas" She tried in vain but he picked up a pint glass and threw it across the room it shattered on the wall as only missing her head because she dived onto the sofa, but the shard rained down on her unprotected back, cutting it painfully, but she lay perfectly still holding in the cry she wanted to release.
"Have a good mission" Jonas said carelessly as he went back upstairs, with no remorse in his voice, almost as if he had forgotten what he'd down or just did not consider it important.
Sam was called back from her recollection as, Janet tried to clean the wounds on her back and it stung painfully on the deeper cuts. 'Yer I had a great mission Jonas, thanks a million' she quipped in her head cursing who ever idea it had been for them to take full packs.
"Why Sam?" Janet asked softly, it was not the first time she had asked but she felt she had to keep trying
"I woke him up" Sam quipped back knowing what Janet meant but not willing to answer, with the same lies she had been using for years 'I slipped, I fell, I'm clumsy, it was my fault!'
"You know that's not what I meant, your so intelligent, you know this is wrong, stop it before even I can't put you back together again" Janet new it was harsh but she was sick of patching up her best friend, she was in the infirmary more than any other member of the base.
"I can't do it, there are things more important" Sam voice was controlled, she couldn't remember the last time she had cried, she had become numb just going through the actions of living, she suddenly recalled she had cried for Cassandra when she thought she was dying but not for herself, not anymore.
"your not alone and there is nothing more important Sam, you need to get out, whatever he has on you, its not worth it" Janet knelt beside the bed looking Sam straight in the eyes, she couldn't let this go on. "I am going to tell the rest of SG1 what he does, if you don't and you know how they will react so, if you don't want heads ripped off then I suggest you tell them, tell us why" Janet wouldn't let it continue, it was time to act.
"No, you can't, honestly Janet I'll be more careful, I stay out of here, just don't tell them" Sam almost shouted then just stared, thoughts running a million miles an hour through her head.
Janet quickly finished dressing Sam's back "I am going to tell them, you can't go on living like this, being careful doesn't stop you getting hit" She spoke softly trying not to be another threat but she had been patching Sam up for years, she even kept Sam's contraceptives in her locker so Jonas wouldn't know about them, she had tried everything, being supportive but it was time to stand up to Jonas even if Sam wouldn't her friend was so strong in every other way, she felt she had to be strong for her now.
"You've got to let me explain to them why, but I can't tell them what he does, they don't need to know" she spoke almost in a whisper, the hope Janet offered being to great to resist she new she spoke the truth maybe despite her shame they help her out of the horror story that was her current life.
"Yes, they do, they'll help you're a team you support each other"
"That's out there" she waved her arm "they can't do anything here"
"No, it where you need help, lets let them decide if they can help" Janet was surprised out how willingly Sam was to cooperate things must be getting bad. 'Getting bad' she almost laughed at herself they had been bad as long as she had known Sam, worse didn't bare thinking about though.
Daniel was just putting his boots back on when he glanced at Sam's locker next to his own. He worried, he new Jonas bullied her heed realised it as soon as he came on base. No stranger to bullies like Hanson himself. If they weren't married you'd never think of them together. Jonas had never shown Sam any love, in Daniel presence at least, he would touch her possessively but never lovingly. He remembered there first meeting in this room, by that locker
Daniel had entered the locker room with him and the rest of his team, Just as Sam as finishing up 'Sorry, I was just leaving' she muttered as she said as she stuffed her things into her locker, with none of her usual care.
'This stuff goner be a night mare to clean one of Jonas' team had complained
'You should get married mate, Sam here all clean mine for me won't you Sammie' Jonas boasted. Daniel had fully expect Sam usually sarcastic tongue or her just to ignore him, even hit him but the tiny voice that answered wasn't the women Daniel knew he would probably have been less surprised if she had grown another head.
'Sure Jonas' She then tried to slip away, but Jonas had already removed his boots and thrust violently them into Sam's chest still thick with mud staining her shirt and T-shirt,
Daniel expected this to get a reaction but she didn't even make eye contact with the man, as he leered 'Don't run away Sammie, I was talking'
'Sorry Jonas, I got to go the generals waiting' Daniel had thought he was going to hit her right there in front of everyone but as soon as the Hammond was mentioned he backed down
'Well run along dear, don't want to keep the man waiting' Daniel horrified by the whole scene he had confronted Jonas on it, only to be called a geek and to keep his nose out of it. The anger in Jonas had scared Daniel how one man could contain that much hate. The next couple of days Sam spent in the infirmary and nursing a dislocated shoulder Daniel had never mentioned it again.
That had been a long time ago now and he had seen Sam handle so much, he couldn't imagine her backing down at home and hoped what ever had brought them together in the first place was back even if they didn't show it publicly, he could almost kid himself that Sam was just accident prone and some day's she just chose to where more make up than others, almost, he could almost believe that some days.
Latter that night 3 member of SG1 sat in a unused storage room looking vaguely at there watches "So anyone know why we are here" Jack said eventually
"Doctor Frasier, merely requested my presence" Tlea'c stated flatly
"She said it was important" Daniel added
"So where is she" Jack said impatience showing in his voice.
"Right here," came the usual calm voice of Doctor Frasier
"So Doc, what's with all the clock and dagger stuff," Jack asked as she closed the door.
"This" Janet said clearly as she place a thick folder on the table
"Why is a large medical record our concern Doctor Frasier?" Tlea'c asked
"Sam's medical record, we really shouldn't see this Doc" Daniel added
"Are you not bound by patient confidentially laws"
"I allowed to inform family of her medical condition unless she has asked otherwise you have said you consider each other family, and to be honest they can hang me for all I care if you can stop this folder getting larger or worse."
Jack wasn't used to the desperation in her voice but was touched by the caring nature of her words.
"That folder, details all the beating she wasn't able to hide, the cuts, bruises and brakes inflicted, it represent little of the humiliation and pain she suffers regularly, even I don't know it all but that folder speaks volumes. I going to leave it with you for an hour, while I go and find its owner who is willing to speak to you;" 'I hope' she added slightly in her head.
Janet left quickly unwilling to watch the shock and horror when they open that folder, she had seen most of it first hand it was not pretty and Sam had been good at hiding most of it from them.
That's it for now review and I'll put another chapter up soon.