Link Becomes
A Pirate
Psycho Sinner: I LIVE! Well okay I never really died but still... I saw that this was decently popular so I've decided to get off my lazy ass and end it with the fifth and final chapter. Enjoy(by the way. FLAME ME AND I SHALL USE THEM TO COOK ANOTHER RITO!)
Link woke up and looked down at Tetra before he realized something. Either the dress was cutting off the air to his brain or he was turning gay but either way he had just realized that he rather liked wearing this thing now. It felt nice against his skin and he felt so very free in it. He twisted around and managed to get out of the ropes that were keeping him stuck onto the celing, only to end up falling onto Tetra and making her wake up.
Tetra:Ah! Link! What the hell are you doing you perverted little basterd child of a fossil.
Link:1) I'm perverted! This coming from the girl who's had more nuts in her mouth then a squirrel in fall and spends so much time screwing me I think I'm going to be a father before I'm fifteen! 2) Nothing much, you?
Tetra smacked him and got dressed before she looked at Link who was looking through her drawer.
Tetra:WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!
Link:My oh my. Who would think the big bad pirate would have this.
Link held up a small stuffed animal that looked like a fish. He then watched as Tetra glared at him and tried to grab it.
Tetra:Give that back!
Link:Look at the fishy!
Link threw the stuffed animal into the air and it got stuck ontop of one of them beams. A scream was heard so loud that a few miles away the tower of the gods sank back down under the water and then Link rolled out of the room, naked and holding where his nuts used to be. After checking to see if he still had his family jewels he got dressed in his normal tunic and then went to get something to eat.
Link:I am starving... huh?
Link looked at the very angry mob of pirates who were looking at him.
Link:Oh yeah it was my turn to cook wasn't it.
Guy with glasses(Still don't know his name):Get him!
Link screamed like the little bitch he was as he ran away from the mob of pirates. He hid in his room before he heard something behind him. He lit the latren and saw all the pirates sitting in his room.
Link: WHAT IN THE NAME OF HELL!
Link broke down the door and ran away from the mob, ending up hiding in the store room. He then turned and came face to face with Tetra.
Link(Cursing the goddesses):Why do you hate me?
Goddesses:Because you woke us up, made us hold those stupid balls and then we ended up with a whole bunch of weirdo's staring at us.
Link: Okay... Me thinks Tetra is not the only one p.m.s.ing.
Tetra: I can hear you ya know.
Link:Fuck...
Link ended up getting the shit kicked out of him by a small angry girl and three goddesses. Tetra then decided to take advantage of the situation and dragged Link up thue stairs to her room, making sure his head bounced on each step.
Din: Where are you going?
Tetra: To have some fun.
Naryu: Can we join.
Tetra: Meh sure why not, after all I think we could all have some fun together.
Faore(Can't remember how to spell her stupid name): No way, I hate him besides i'm a lesbian.
Din: No wonder you didn't join us when those royal knights died and we went to pay them a visit.
Naryu: And no wonder you kept hitting on that girl a while ago with the green hair when she became a sage.
Faore: What!? I like the color green?
Din: That would also explain why you happen to be so stupid most of the time.
Faore left and the other two goddesses went and joined Tetra in her fun. A few hours later Link woke up and looked around. He discovered that Tetra must have left along with goddesses since he was alone in the room. Link began to look around again and discovered a bunch of rolled pieces of paper that smelled weird. He pulled a lamp near one to examine it and a spark from the lamp lit one end of the thing. Curious Link stuck the thing in his mouth and inhaled before he began to feel odd. A short while Later Tetra arrived back at her room only to find Link sitting, stoned in the middle of her room after smoking all her weed.
Tetra: LINK!
Link didn't seem to really notice her as off he was staring out the window. Tetra yelled and then threw him against the wall.
Tetra: LINK I'LL SKIN YOU ALIVE FOR THIS ONE!
Tetra pulled out dagger and watched as Link slowly ame out of it before he shook his head.
Link: That was fucked up.
Tetra: Come here you little fuckhead!
Link screamed like a pansy assed bitch this time and ran away, only to bumb into the goddesses.
Link: Oh no... Please don't do anything evil! I'm already going to die!
Din: You got us pregnant you little shit!
Naryu: Do you even realize how much crap you are now in buster!
Link: Don't kill me please!
Link begged and acted so bloody pathetic that Din sighed and only gave his a swift kick to the side of the head that sent him flying into the wall.
Din: Fine but you're taking care of the kids.
Link: I hate... my life...
Link then watched as Tetra screamed a battle cry and tried to stab his in the nuts. Link moved out of the way and ran off, heading towards the ships deck.
Link: I have got to use that catapault to get...
Link looked at where the catapault was and then yelled.
Link: Where the fuck did it go.
Random Pirate:Miss Tetra got rid of it after you fired her out of it.
Link: Why me!
Tetra caught up to him and gave him a got beating before she hung him by his ankles from the mast without his pants on.
Link: Can we talk about this?
Tetra: No.
She pulled out a dart and threw it at Link before he suddenly got his spine back and caught it,smiling evily.
Link: Time to pay the piper bitch!
He used the dart to cut the ropes before he ran up to Tetra and went to kick her in the groin before he remembered she was a woman so he just grabbed her and tied her to the mast before he had some fun. He then looked up and chuckled.
Link: Oh Din, Naryu!
The goddesses came down and glared at him.
Din: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT!
Link: Just wanted to say... WHO'S YOUR DADDY BITCH!
He went and kicked her in the leg before he stuck the dart up her ass and then turned to Naryu.
Naryu: Fuck...
Link: I AM LINK, YOU'RE MY BITCH SO SUCK IT!
He procced to give Naryu a through fucking before he kicked her in the head so hard she went into coma.
Link: That damn dress must have had some kind of pansy shit in it!
Link got into his boat and went to Mother and Child Isle, getting his best idea yet. A few hours later he arrived and used the Ballad of Gales to get inside and watched as the Fairy Queen came out.
Link: I'm here to make a complaint! You're bitch as whores of fairies keep trying to fuck me!
Fairy Queen: I know, I told them to that way you'd be nice and ready when I came for you.
Link: WHAT THE FUCK!? YOU'RE A SICK LITTLE BITCH AREN'T YOU! YOU PROBABLLY HAD LEATHER WHIPS AND SHIT AS WELL!
Fairy Queen: How did you know?
Link screamed before he grabbed her and gave her a good shit kicking. He then left and went back to the ship, still not wearing any pants and glared as the pirates stared at him.
Link: What, just cause you ain't got nothing don't mean you have to fantisize about mine!
The pirates yelled at him and then began to chase after him with their ship.
Link: you think I'm impressed by a huge chunk of floating crap that couldn't even survive a few cannon balls?
Pirate:Uh... yes?
Link: EEEHHH! WRONG!
Link got onto the ship and procceded to put the word pain in painful. After a good while he looked around and then went to Tetra's room.
Tetra: Uh Link... I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!
Link: You've said that so many times it's getting old.
Tetra: Okay then how's this. LINK I WILL TEAR OUT YOUR GUTS AND HANG YOU WITH THEM! Better?
Link: Much.
Link then kicked her in the head and broke her nose before he laughed evily. Sure Ganon may have been the lord of evil, but he was evil. He soon enough took over the ship and made everyone fear him. He would go and kill men, rape young female children and make anybody who disagree with him end up with their head's stuck in their own asses.
The End
Psycho Sinner: There done and if you have a problem with it, let me know. Not like I'll really care but if it makes anyone feel better I'll act like I care if they flame me.
A Pirate
Psycho Sinner: I LIVE! Well okay I never really died but still... I saw that this was decently popular so I've decided to get off my lazy ass and end it with the fifth and final chapter. Enjoy(by the way. FLAME ME AND I SHALL USE THEM TO COOK ANOTHER RITO!)
Link woke up and looked down at Tetra before he realized something. Either the dress was cutting off the air to his brain or he was turning gay but either way he had just realized that he rather liked wearing this thing now. It felt nice against his skin and he felt so very free in it. He twisted around and managed to get out of the ropes that were keeping him stuck onto the celing, only to end up falling onto Tetra and making her wake up.
Tetra:Ah! Link! What the hell are you doing you perverted little basterd child of a fossil.
Link:1) I'm perverted! This coming from the girl who's had more nuts in her mouth then a squirrel in fall and spends so much time screwing me I think I'm going to be a father before I'm fifteen! 2) Nothing much, you?
Tetra smacked him and got dressed before she looked at Link who was looking through her drawer.
Tetra:WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!
Link:My oh my. Who would think the big bad pirate would have this.
Link held up a small stuffed animal that looked like a fish. He then watched as Tetra glared at him and tried to grab it.
Tetra:Give that back!
Link:Look at the fishy!
Link threw the stuffed animal into the air and it got stuck ontop of one of them beams. A scream was heard so loud that a few miles away the tower of the gods sank back down under the water and then Link rolled out of the room, naked and holding where his nuts used to be. After checking to see if he still had his family jewels he got dressed in his normal tunic and then went to get something to eat.
Link:I am starving... huh?
Link looked at the very angry mob of pirates who were looking at him.
Link:Oh yeah it was my turn to cook wasn't it.
Guy with glasses(Still don't know his name):Get him!
Link screamed like the little bitch he was as he ran away from the mob of pirates. He hid in his room before he heard something behind him. He lit the latren and saw all the pirates sitting in his room.
Link: WHAT IN THE NAME OF HELL!
Link broke down the door and ran away from the mob, ending up hiding in the store room. He then turned and came face to face with Tetra.
Link(Cursing the goddesses):Why do you hate me?
Goddesses:Because you woke us up, made us hold those stupid balls and then we ended up with a whole bunch of weirdo's staring at us.
Link: Okay... Me thinks Tetra is not the only one p.m.s.ing.
Tetra: I can hear you ya know.
Link:Fuck...
Link ended up getting the shit kicked out of him by a small angry girl and three goddesses. Tetra then decided to take advantage of the situation and dragged Link up thue stairs to her room, making sure his head bounced on each step.
Din: Where are you going?
Tetra: To have some fun.
Naryu: Can we join.
Tetra: Meh sure why not, after all I think we could all have some fun together.
Faore(Can't remember how to spell her stupid name): No way, I hate him besides i'm a lesbian.
Din: No wonder you didn't join us when those royal knights died and we went to pay them a visit.
Naryu: And no wonder you kept hitting on that girl a while ago with the green hair when she became a sage.
Faore: What!? I like the color green?
Din: That would also explain why you happen to be so stupid most of the time.
Faore left and the other two goddesses went and joined Tetra in her fun. A few hours later Link woke up and looked around. He discovered that Tetra must have left along with goddesses since he was alone in the room. Link began to look around again and discovered a bunch of rolled pieces of paper that smelled weird. He pulled a lamp near one to examine it and a spark from the lamp lit one end of the thing. Curious Link stuck the thing in his mouth and inhaled before he began to feel odd. A short while Later Tetra arrived back at her room only to find Link sitting, stoned in the middle of her room after smoking all her weed.
Tetra: LINK!
Link didn't seem to really notice her as off he was staring out the window. Tetra yelled and then threw him against the wall.
Tetra: LINK I'LL SKIN YOU ALIVE FOR THIS ONE!
Tetra pulled out dagger and watched as Link slowly ame out of it before he shook his head.
Link: That was fucked up.
Tetra: Come here you little fuckhead!
Link screamed like a pansy assed bitch this time and ran away, only to bumb into the goddesses.
Link: Oh no... Please don't do anything evil! I'm already going to die!
Din: You got us pregnant you little shit!
Naryu: Do you even realize how much crap you are now in buster!
Link: Don't kill me please!
Link begged and acted so bloody pathetic that Din sighed and only gave his a swift kick to the side of the head that sent him flying into the wall.
Din: Fine but you're taking care of the kids.
Link: I hate... my life...
Link then watched as Tetra screamed a battle cry and tried to stab his in the nuts. Link moved out of the way and ran off, heading towards the ships deck.
Link: I have got to use that catapault to get...
Link looked at where the catapault was and then yelled.
Link: Where the fuck did it go.
Random Pirate:Miss Tetra got rid of it after you fired her out of it.
Link: Why me!
Tetra caught up to him and gave him a got beating before she hung him by his ankles from the mast without his pants on.
Link: Can we talk about this?
Tetra: No.
She pulled out a dart and threw it at Link before he suddenly got his spine back and caught it,smiling evily.
Link: Time to pay the piper bitch!
He used the dart to cut the ropes before he ran up to Tetra and went to kick her in the groin before he remembered she was a woman so he just grabbed her and tied her to the mast before he had some fun. He then looked up and chuckled.
Link: Oh Din, Naryu!
The goddesses came down and glared at him.
Din: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT!
Link: Just wanted to say... WHO'S YOUR DADDY BITCH!
He went and kicked her in the leg before he stuck the dart up her ass and then turned to Naryu.
Naryu: Fuck...
Link: I AM LINK, YOU'RE MY BITCH SO SUCK IT!
He procced to give Naryu a through fucking before he kicked her in the head so hard she went into coma.
Link: That damn dress must have had some kind of pansy shit in it!
Link got into his boat and went to Mother and Child Isle, getting his best idea yet. A few hours later he arrived and used the Ballad of Gales to get inside and watched as the Fairy Queen came out.
Link: I'm here to make a complaint! You're bitch as whores of fairies keep trying to fuck me!
Fairy Queen: I know, I told them to that way you'd be nice and ready when I came for you.
Link: WHAT THE FUCK!? YOU'RE A SICK LITTLE BITCH AREN'T YOU! YOU PROBABLLY HAD LEATHER WHIPS AND SHIT AS WELL!
Fairy Queen: How did you know?
Link screamed before he grabbed her and gave her a good shit kicking. He then left and went back to the ship, still not wearing any pants and glared as the pirates stared at him.
Link: What, just cause you ain't got nothing don't mean you have to fantisize about mine!
The pirates yelled at him and then began to chase after him with their ship.
Link: you think I'm impressed by a huge chunk of floating crap that couldn't even survive a few cannon balls?
Pirate:Uh... yes?
Link: EEEHHH! WRONG!
Link got onto the ship and procceded to put the word pain in painful. After a good while he looked around and then went to Tetra's room.
Tetra: Uh Link... I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!
Link: You've said that so many times it's getting old.
Tetra: Okay then how's this. LINK I WILL TEAR OUT YOUR GUTS AND HANG YOU WITH THEM! Better?
Link: Much.
Link then kicked her in the head and broke her nose before he laughed evily. Sure Ganon may have been the lord of evil, but he was evil. He soon enough took over the ship and made everyone fear him. He would go and kill men, rape young female children and make anybody who disagree with him end up with their head's stuck in their own asses.
The End
Psycho Sinner: There done and if you have a problem with it, let me know. Not like I'll really care but if it makes anyone feel better I'll act like I care if they flame me.