Part 8

Rachel couldn't remove her thoughts from Jack's story. All the while, she thought Jack never intended to hurt his wife or his kids... so maybe he didn't intend, but he still cheated on Judy. She couldn't believe everything. Although, she didn't lose respect for the man; if possible, she gained even more. She was amazed at how he was able to sacrifice his source of livelihood for the sake of having a complete family...

'Maybe that was what was missing in my family,' she thought, recalling the many fights her parents had. In her case, Leonard and Sandra attempted only a few times to make their marriage work. After getting tired of fighting over the same issues over and over again- time, money and expenditure, they decided to separate. Rachel found it hard to believe that she lost hope in her relationship with Ross... yet she realized that it was how their views in life were somehow affected by the way they were raised.

Ross always believed in chances because his father never seemed to give up on his goal; Rachel believed that enough is enough because her parents hardly made things work out the way they should be. She didn't blame Leonard and Sandra for that particular outcome because they were great parents... but now that she realized everything, she was scared that it was too late... maybe there could've been a chance for her and Ross to reconcile and be happy again. Frustrated, Rachel washed her face in the bathroom of the hospital. She wanted to go home and rest her mind, which was filled with questions of "What if..."

Meanwhile, Ross remained seated on the couch of the waiting area, holding another cup of coffee. Seeing his father hooked up in machines definitely drained him out. His father was always the strong, indestructible type... the one who rescued him in the pool when he was four, the one who inspired him to act, the one who taught him how to punch and defend himself, the one who loved him more than his job. It was, indeed, a depressing sight for Ross.

Upon closing the door of the bathroom, Rachel noticed Ross moping on the couch. Trying her best to look okay, she smiled at him and approached him.

"Hey..." Ross greeted her.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked in return.

"I'm- I'm getting there!"

"That's good to hear. Swee-"Upon realizing her slip of the tongue, she immediately said, "Ross!"

Awakened by her sudden high-pitched voice, Ross strangely looked at her, "Yeah? Is there something wrong?"

'Thank God he didn't hear me,' she thought to herself.

"Rach?"

"Um yeah- I was gonna ask you if you wanted to come over first? I'll be going home in a while, and I wondered you might want to freshen up or rest a bit? You've been here since yesterday wearing the same clothes!"

Appeased with her concern, Ross considered her suggestion and nodded. "Okay!"

In the car going home, Rachel remained silent. She didn't know why she had to take Ross with her, in her car, and beside her. She glanced at him and noticed his tiredness.

'It's 2am already and I don't want him to go home alone. Besides, his house is thrice as far as mine from the hospital,' she convinced herself. 'I'm just concerned,' she kept repeating.

After twenty minutes or so, they reached the estate. Rachel tapped his arm to wake him up, "Ross we're here."

He couldn't help himself anymore, he was too tired.

Rachel motioned the helpers to assist him while walking to his room. She remained behind him, recalling a familiar scene when Ross came home drunk from a gathering they had. Rachel distinctly remembered every detail including the reason why he was drunk- she told him she was carrying their firstborn. It was the first and only time she'd seen him treat everyone loads of drinks because of his excitement.

"Madam?" the helper asked.

"Yeah?" she replied, coming back from memory lane.

"Would you like anything else?"

"Just inform the rest that Ross is here in this guestroom so that they can address his needs. Thanks Beverly!"

With that, the helper left.

She remained in the room, watching Ross' figure on the bed breathe. Once again, 'What if' questions flooded her thoughts...

'What if I forgave him?' 'What if I told him I didn't want things to end?' 'What if...' She couldn't stay put. Those unanswered questions were eating her alive.

Her loud groan woke Ross up. He lifted his head, looked around and saw Rachel guiltily staring at him. "Sorry!"

Ross smiled and asked, "It's alright. I have to take a bath anyway! So how long have you been standing there?"

"I- I just passed by!" finding it hard to make up an excuse, "I peeped in to check on you."

The truth was she stood there for about thirty minutes, watching him sleep.

"I got you some clothes, they're in the bathroom."

"I still have clothes here?" Ross said as he stood up and stretched.

"Yeah. They haven't been used for three years though!" she laughed.

"I better get going so you can freshen up. I'll see you tomorrow!" She waved and left.

'If I told you I'd leave everything just to have you, would you believe me?' Rachel remembered Ross' sweet words in Bahamas. The sun was about to rise, and still, she couldn't sleep. 'Did he really mean it?' she thought, 'People need to make sacrifices to make a relationship work... Have I done enough?' That final realization worsened her recollection. All she could do was grieve… the man she loved the most was a few rooms away from hers, yet it seemed like he was at the end of the world. 'It's too late. He probably moved on already,' she cried. Why didn't she think of that when they were still together? Why didn't she forgive him earlier?

Ross went down and found Rachel drinking coffee alone in the garden, admiring the sunrise. Rachel used to do that even when they were still married. He'd wake up alone in the room early in the morning and find his wife drinking coffee or tea on the balcony of their room, watching the sunrise.

"Hey Rach!" he greeted as he sat down across her.

Afraid to show her swollen, red eyes, she wrinkled her forehead and responded, "Oh, you're up so early!"

"I was planning to leave before the kids wake up."

"Okay, are you hungry? Don't worry, I won't cook for you. Greg's up as well."

Ross smiled at her, "I'll grab a bite in a while. Do you mind if I join you here?"

"No, not at all!"

Together they watched as the sun slowly rose.

Ross sensed Rachel's quietness, "Is everything alright?"

She leisurely sipped from her coffee, trying to avoid answering his question. But her attempt was unsuccessful, and Ross waited for an answer. "Uhuh!" and pretended to smile.

Satisfied with her response, Ross asked, "So, how are you these days?"

"I'm- well, I've been okay. I've been busy with work and with the kids."

"Any new suitors?" he jokingly asked, being used to her numerous admirers.

"I haven't been interested in that," she light-heartedly replied.

"What about you? I heard from Monica that you and Joey had a double date not so long ago?" releasing a thorn that's been bothering her for the past week.

"Oh that- yeah, we went out a couple of times!"

'Couple of times? They went out a couple of times?' Rachel thought to herself. "Oh, that's great to hear!" she uncomfortably replied. "So you're dating?"

"You can say that..." he admitted.

Rachel felt a stab on her chest, 'he was moving on,' she thought. That was it... why else should she consider another reconciliation if he was moving on. Ross never dated anyone since they separated. Admitting that he was already with someone else should mean something. It was too late for Rachel, and she felt like a wilted leaf out in the dessert... alone.

Ross couldn't spell out Rachel's reaction. Was she really happy for him? If she was, then that meant they were finally going their separate ways. Talking to the woman he loved about the woman he could possibly love was actually happening.

Finally, the sun was up; it was the start of a new day. It somehow resembled as if it was a brand new start for the both of them. There they were, seated inches apart… discussing about a life yet to be lived, away from each other's arms.

He didn't know if he should be happy or sad, but he surely felt the validity of their separation.

Mattie sat down on Jack's bed. Amongst all Jack's grandchildren, Mattie was the most affectionate towards him. He simply loved making his 'pappy' laugh and smile. "Pops, why do birds fly?" he asked.

Since they brought Jack home, he had been bored stiff in his room. Thankfully, Ross and Monica brought their kids once in a while. "Because God gave them wings to explore the world from above."

"Then why do flies have wings? They can't explore the world from above- they're too small. But they definitely get a good view of poop."

Jack laughed and motioned his grandson to hug him.

"Pops, why are you sick?"

"Cause I didn't eat the right food, so you better eat properly so you won't get sick!"

"Is mommy gonna get sick too?"

"Why?"

"Cause she hasn't been eating much! She's really weird now. Justin said she keeps on sulking in her room."

"Really?" Jack suddenly became concerned and interested, "Since when?"

"I dunno... I guess a few weeks or months," peeling a lollipop. "You want it?" he asked, offering his grandpa.

Jack smiled and accepted his grandson's offering, but he was in deep thought.

He was right all along. Why would she behave weird all of a sudden…? It must've been since they talked about how he sacrificed for his marriage to work. Things weren't over between them! But one question rang in his mind, 'do they know that?' But he shouldn't tell his son or Rachel what he or she should do; they'd have to learn for themselves...

After a few hours, Ross entered his father's room and found him alone on his bed, watching TV. "Dad," he greeted.

Still paying attention to the NBA game he was watching, he held up his hand and motioned Ross to pause. After a few seconds, the commercial came on, "When will your kids visit me again?"

He sat down beside his father, "I'll try to bring them again with me in a few weeks. They'll be in New York next week."

"Why are they going to New York?"

"Rachel's bringing them to her mother's." Seeing his father's upset reaction, he added, "Dad summer's coming up. You'll see them again soon, don't worry."

The game was on again, and they both focused on the television. "Shoot it! Shoot it!" Jack screamed.

"Aw!" Ross joined in shouting.

"And he misses! That's it for tonight folks- Looks like the game's over. We've only got a second left..." the announcer of the game explained.

"Damn, I thought they were going to win!" Jack complained, switching the channel.

"I just lost 2000 bucks to Joey!" Ross grumbled.

Jack chuckled and started surfing through the channels... then he stopped at a local channel. "Let's see what's on the news." Ross looked at the TV then at his father, 'he must really be bored nowadays,' he said to himself.

Jack hated watching the news, it always depressed him... but after being home, in the same room, for quite a long time, with his dearest TiVo recording every show he wanted to watch in all the channels possible, he ended up stuck with the 'current events.'

Unknown to Ross, it was a different kind of news program... it was Entertainment Tonight! Ross watched along with his father, intrigued with the program he hardly watched. To their surprise, Rachel was said to be interviewed.

Jack looked at Ross and observed his reaction.

"Rachel, the finale was fantastic! But why did your character leave? Are you quitting the show?" the reporter asked.

Rachel, who was gorgeously wearing a red gown, smiled at the camera and replied, "No I'm not. I'm just really taking a break, and I'll be back in a few months or so."

"Any particular reason why? Are you making a movie?"

"I'm considering an offer," she replied, beaming a smile, "And it's set in Asia! I better stop or the producers and the director might fire me. "

Ross intently watched Rachel's every move...he saw her eyes sparkle as she smiled, he saw her eyelashes emphasizing her exquisiteness at her every blink, he saw her glamorous figure as they interviewed and chased her around the beneficial ball... she was so… beautiful.

"She still loves you, you know," Jack quietly said, seeing Ross' reaction.

"Huh?" Ross said, awakening from his gaze.

"I said she still loves you."

Ross nodded his head and looked back at the TV. "That's- that's nice to hear."

"She hasn't moved on yet..."

"Dad!" he scolded his father, "Let's not get into that. I have a girlfriend already, remember?"

"Okay," Jack simply said and shifted his attention to the television.

Obviously, Ross became bothered by Jack's last remark. He shot his father a look and asked him, "Dad, you're not funny okay."

Ignoring Ross' stare, Jack remained focused on the TV, "Okay."

"Dad! Look," checked on his watch, "I don't have all day. What are you trying to say?"

Jack wanted to prolong his son's contemplation, but after seeing his death-defying stare, he turned off the TV and faced him. "I said she's still not ever you, son."

"Are you sure? How did you know? Dad, we've been over since November. Come on... she was the one who broke up with me!"

"You heard what I said. Ross, I won't jeopardize your feelings."

With that, Ross frowned and looked away. "Why just now? It's been almost 6 months! How did you know?"

"I just do."

"Dad-"

"Okay, your son said she hasn't been eating well lately, and that she's been sulking and behaving weirdly."

"And with that you derived the idea that she's not over me?" he sarcastically asked.

"No."

"Then how can you tell me that- that-"

Cutting Ross, Jack continued his explanation, "Because I had a talk with her a few months ago. If you don't want to believe me, then go on and live your life. Forget we ever had this conversation," and tuned to the television again.

That left Ross speechless... he knew he had to do something, but what? He wasn't even certain if his father's theory was true. Jack looked at Ross. He felt bad for him because he looked like a lost child, trying to find the right way. But will there ever be a right way in life?

Rachel was exhausted. She had to do last minute errands before leaving for New York. She planned on going with her kids, spending as much time with them, before going around Asia to shoot for her upcoming film. She badly wanted to get in her room, lie on her bed and sleep.

She entered her house with some assistants following her. "Have my suit dry cleaned," she said, pointing to the bag carried by Beverly.

As customary, Rachel always passed by the mini kitchen next to her room to get a pitcher of water. Upon opening the refrigerator, she noticed a dark figure behind her. She slowly looked and freaked out, and immediately opened the lights only to find Ross blankly staring at her.

"Oh God- Ross! What are you doing here? I thought I was gonna have a heart attack," she screamed and sat down, resting her hand on her chest.

Ross remained quiet, he just looked at her.

"O-kay," eyeing him weirdly, "Oh, were you supposed to pick up the kids? I had them dropped at Monica's this morning. They wanted to play so I told them they might as well sleep there since- " Noticing his odd behavior, Rachel arched her eyebrows, "What's up?"

Ross frowned. He suddenly stood up and went in front of her, "I hate to be the one to confess to you all the time," he angrily said.

"What?" Rachel asked, puzzled.

"I'm sick and tired of talking to you, being the one to initiate conversations like this." Ross paused, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?" she asked confusedly.

"That you weren't over me!" he said, raising his voice.

"What?" Rachel asked, raising her voice as well. Her heart was beating fast... she never expected Ross to just come over and say that. 'Could Monica have told him anything?' she asked herself.

"I said, why didn't you tell me you still weren't over me?"

Rachel kept silent even though Ross seemed furious by now. She remained seated, avoiding eye contact, while Ross stood in front of her, looking at her straight in the eye. "Why? Since when Rach?"

After a few seconds of complete silence, Rachel replied, "It's not that easy, Ross. I may not be over you, but you've moved on. Who the hell cares how I feel?"

"I DO!" he yelled.

Rachel started to tear... she was already tired, and now she had to deal with emotions she kept and buried under everything.

Ross sat across her a hung his head. He was confused, and his mind was completely blank.

"Ross, we're done. We talked about this already, remember? And now, you've moved on, and I probably will in time." she said, quickly wiping the tears that ran down her cheeks.

"Why do you do this all the time?" Ross coldly commented. "Why do you always disregard every possible chance we have to work things out?" Rachel looked down... he was right. "God- Rach. What else do you want me to do? To say? Can't you just believe me when I tell you that I love you? That I'll do everything to make our relationship work? What?" raising his voice.

By the time he finished lecturing her, Rachel was already in tears. She tried her best to avoid Ross' gaze, and remained focused on the floor.

Ross, who was crying as well, stood up and knelt down in front of her. He scooped her face with his hands and wiped the tears from her cheek. "Do you love me?" he softly asked.

Rachel managed to glance at him and nod while she sobbed.

Ross couldn't hesitate any longer... he slowly leaned closer and kissed her on the lips. Rachel looked at him as his lips approached hers. At first she didn't respond, she felt numb and she couldn't move. Upon realizing that, Ross broke the kiss and looked down... only to be lip-locked with Rachel again, this time with her initiating it. It wasn't just an ordinary kiss. It lasted for what seemed like a lifetime... and they savored every moment.

He held her in his arms, not wanting to let her go. Both weren't aware of what was happening but it felt right. After breaking the kiss, Rachel couldn't remove her eyes from Ross. She gazed at him, he gazed at her... everything remained silent, and only their heavy breathing can be heard.

"Are you willing to work on this?" Ross asked.

Rachel didn't have to think... she simply nodded and grinned at him.

With that, Ross smiled and kissed her once more.

"We'll take things slowly, okay?" he asked, in between kisses.

"Okay," she replied and sweetly smiled at him. "Because I don't wanna lose you anymore." she added, stopping their kiss.

Caressing her face and satisfied with her answer, he responded, "I don't want to lose you either..."