The First slipped invisibly through the bar and watched Spike. It toyed
with tormenting him, but knew that it would backfire. Whistler was lurking
somewhere in the background and would be right there to stop things before
they could get interesting.
It instantaneously transported itself to the Summers home just in time to see the Slayer and her friends leave with one of the proto-slayers in tow. It flitted inside to check up on the other potentials. As it listened in on the conversation between those left behind, it was filled with evil glee. So close to its goal, it had been thwarted by Whistler - and now Buffy was charging off with just enough misinformation to make a fatal mistake and leave the Chosen line open for complete destruction. Things could not get any better if it had planned them this way.
Buffy and Xander were arguing about where to go. "I say the high school, Buff. If he's wigging out, it makes sense that he'd go somewhere that felt familiar."
"We went with that idea and checked the crypt first. No Spike," she reminded him. "I still say that unsouled Spike went on a bender when he was depressed, and the souled version is likely to do the same thing."
"Why don't you guys go check the High School, and let Buffy and me check the demon bar?" Kennedy suggested. Buffy just gave her a look.
Giles spoke up. "I would tend to agree that the pub is a more logical option."
"Thank you, Giles." Buffy gave Xander a smirk. "See? Psychology girl, that's me."
"Actually, it's more that being English, the local is the first place one would be likely to head after earth shattering news. But your idea has merit as well."
Buffy rolled her eyes, then started out down the street, leading them towards Willy's. Kennedy fell into step beside her, the two of them pulling a moderate distance ahead of the rest of the team.
"So what's the plan?" she asked. "Just walk up and stake him? You don't think he's just going to let you do it, do you?"
Buffy gave her a sidelong glance and kept walking. "Yes, as a matter of fact, I do. I think that if I walked up and told him to pull his shirt open so that I could get a better aim, he'd do that exactly that. And he'd turn his face away from me so that I wouldn't even have to look him in the eye while I did it."
Kennedy frowned. "I don't get it, Buffy. I don't understand you, and I sure as hell don't understand him. None of this is covered in the Slayer's Handbook."
Buffy chuckled. "That's what they keep telling me. I wouldn't know. I've never read the damn thing."
"That explains a lot." Kennedy kicked a stone and watched it skittering along in front of them. "My Watcher made it all seem so black and white. Good, Evil. Kill Vampires. Kill demons. Live on the edge, die young. But you..." Kennedy shook her head. "Giles has told us a few things. Dawn filled in a lot of blanks that he wouldn't. And between the things that Willow, Xander and Anya have said or hinted at, it sounds like you go out of your way to break the rules."
"No, not really," Buffy clarified. "Like I said, no handbook. I never knew the rules, so I made up my own. I drove Giles crazy and I really pissed off the council a bunch of times. I kinda felt bad about Giles, but... did you ever meet Travers?"
"Once." Kennedy smiled. "You pissed him off? That's cool."
"Yeah, I felt pretty good about it."
They were quiet for a few moments, but Kennedy continued, curiosity getting the best of her. "I just don't understand how you ended up sleeping with a vampire." There was distaste evident in her tone. "I mean, okay - Dawn told us about Angel, and I sort of understand, being that he had a soul, and was fighting by your side from the beginning and all... but Spike? He was evil." She gave Buffy a searching look. "Why?"
Buffy sighed. "It's a long, complicated story. The simplest way to explain it is that Spike loved me, but he didn't expect anything from me. I needed to be loved without expectations and demands." Her expression was solemn as she caught the other girl's gaze. "Spike has always been more complex then other vampires I have known. He's been a pain in my ass many times because he could always see past the bullshit and get right to the heart of the matter - even when no one else wanted to see the truth. He knew that Willow was in trouble before any of us did, tried to tell us - no one listened. He knows all of us a lot better than we're comfortable with. And he tells the truth." A smiled played around her lips. "That's probably mostly because he's a lousy liar, but still."
"And you love him?"
"I... I don't really know how I feel about him. I care, I have to admit that." Her face got hard again. "But it doesn't matter anymore. What matters is that I have to do this. He'll understand." The last part seemed more like a plea that he would than certain knowledge. She came to a halt.
"Buffy?"
She pointed to the entranceway to a dingy looking building. "We're here."
Willy looked up as he heard the door open. "What can I get... oh. Slayer." He smiled nervously. "How can I help you?"
"Where's Spike?"
His gaze darted nervously to the back before returning to her face. "Spike? Uhm, haven't seen him in ages. Couldn't tell you."
Buffy stepped up to the bar and fingered the charred cotton blanket draped over one of the bar stools. "Willy. Where. Is. Spike? Don't make me ask you again."
He sighed. "In the back."
As she turned to make her way across the room, Willie spoke again, this time addressing Kennedy. "Hey, you're new around here." He eyed her speculatively. "I don't suppose you're interested in making a few bucks? I have a cousin who's a photographer..."
Kennedy scowled at him. He gulped. "Or maybe not."
The group of them walked to the back of the bar and stopped in front of the door to the back room. Buffy turned to face them. "Look, you guys. I appreciate that you are here for me and all. But I really need to do this alone."
Xander started to protest, but Giles stilled him with a look. "We'll wait right here. If you need us, just call."
"I'm going in with you," Kennedy disagreed.
Buffy shook her head. "Kennedy, I promise you, if I need help to do this, I will call you. Please let me talk to him alone. I owe him that much."
The other girl looked ready to argue the point, but backed down. "Fine. But don't take too long, or I'm coming in, invited or not."
Buffy stepped through the door and pulled it closed behind her with a solid click. Spike was sitting alone at the poker table, his eyes closed. She noted that he looked tired, the dark shadows of bruises still adorning his face.
"S'bout time," he spoke, eyes still closed. "Startin' to wonder if you were ever gonna..." he trailed off, cracked an eye open. When he saw her, he bolted upright. "Buffy? What are you doin' here, luv?"
"Looking for you."
"Huh. Well, you found me. Listen, pet, I'm waiting to see a bloke. It's important. Would you mind...." He realized she was trying not to cry, and failing. "Buffy?" He got out of the chair and walked over to her. "What's wrong luv?"
She raised her moist eyes to meet his concerned blue ones, and her heart constricted within her. "You heard what Anya said."
He nodded. "I did."
"We talked about it." She looked away, unable to hold his gaze. "We... Willow, Xander, Giles even... me. I think - I think Anya was right. So this is all my fault."
"You had to do what you thought was best, Buffy. It's not your fault."
"And now it's too late," she went on as if he hadn't spoken at all. "It doesn't even matter if I love you or not, because the damage is done. You went out and got a soul to prove yourself to me, and now everything is messed up."
Spike was looking at the floor now. "I'm sorry I screwed things up, luv. I want to try and fix it. That's why-"
"It's too late to fix it," she whispered. "Giles was right. There is only one way to stabilize the Balance." She pulled the stake out of her jacket pocket and held it out in front of her, staring at it. Light glinted off the highly polished wood. "I don't want to. But I have to."
Spike considered telling her about the soul stealer, but only for a moment. It was probably better this way. Without his soul or the chip, he really wasn't sure if he'd be able to keep from turning evil again. It was so much easier to just let the demon be in control and to stop striving. What he'd done to Buffy the previous spring was a testament to that. And there was certainly no possibility of ever earning Buffy's love the way he was before.
Slowly, he began to unbutton his shirt. Buffy looked up as the movement caught her eye. "Just want to make sure you have a clear target, luv." Tears rolled unchecked down her face as he continued. "Don't cry, pet. Just strike hard and true." He pulled his shirt open, tilted his head back and closed his eyes. "Do it, Buffy.
She started to weep in earnest, and lifted the stake. "I'm so sorry," she sobbed. "I wish there was some other way. I have no choice!"
"Don't you?"
Buffy whirled around, and her stake clattered to the floor. "Whistler?"
"Well? Time's a wastin'."
She was nonplussed. "What... what do you mean?"
"Choices, Slayer. Do you honestly believe you have no other choice?"
Spike growled at the other demon. "Don't make things any more difficult for her than they already are, mate!"
Whistler clucked his tongue and wagged his finger at the vampire. "You've been a dishonest boy, William. Don't you have anything that you want to tell her?"
Buffy swiveled around to face Spike again. "Tell me what?" Her voice quavered.
Spike slumped forward and hung his head. "S'not important, Buffy. It really is better this way."
"Tell. Me. WHAT?" she ground out.
He sighed. "I was here to meet with the soul stealer." He glanced up at her. "Figured if getting' the soul was what mucked everything up, maybe getting rid of it would make things right again." He snorted in derision. "But I reckon I'll just muck that up, too. Buffy, without a soul - well, Spike's not fixed anymore, you know that. And I remember what Angelus was like when he lost his soul. Demon was half crazed. I'm thinkin' mine might be a little crazed after being trapped in here for the last few months." He dropped his gaze from hers. "Rather have you stake me now, luv. Then you could remember me like this, not as a evil thing trying to kill you."
Kennedy stood up and marched towards the door. "I'm going in there."
Giles arm shot out to bar the way. "Wait."
"It's been 10 minutes already. How long does it take to stake a vampire?"
"If she needs your help, she'll call you."
"What if he fooled her? What if she thought he was okay and let her guard down and he got the drop on her? What if she's lying there dead on the carpet right now?"
Xander looked a little nervous at the idea, but Giles stood firm. "We wait."
"I don't think the Watcher is very concerned with your safety," came a soft, southern accented voice from behind them. They turned to find Eve standing there. 'She' addressed Kennedy directly. "I think the only one he really cares about is his slayer."
The girl's hand tightened convulsively around her stake. Giles noted the movement.
"Kennedy. Don't forget this is the First. It is not interested in anything but seeing you and all the others dead. Anything it has to say is suspect."
"Spike has to die," she reasoned, gaze still locked with 'Eve's'. "We agreed on that. It wouldn't hurt to go and see what's going on." With that, the girl darted past Giles's outstretched arm and pushed the door open. Her mouth turned down into a grimace when she saw Spike standing there. "I knew it." She started towards him. Buffy blocked her way.
"You can't do it, can you?" she sneered. "He's your lover and so you're going to sacrifice us all to save him!"
"No, it's not like that," Buffy insisted. "There might be another way."
Giles and Xander followed Kennedy into the room and tried to intercept her, but she evaded them and rushed Buffy, momentum sending them crashing across the room.
'Eve' sauntered in, smirking. "You were right," she continued. "The Slayer doesn't seem to be able to do her job anymore. Looks like someone has to step in and do the job for her."
Xander waded into the fray and earned a kick in the jaw that sent him sprawling. Giles managed to get an arm around Kennedy's waist and pulled her, kicking and screaming, off Buffy.
"Okay, that's enough, Morphy." Whistler intervened. "Leave it alone."
'Eve' glared at him. "You have been aiding the slayer."
"I have not and you know it. I'm allowed to ask questions. I'm not answering any. You, on the other hand, are provoking the girl."
Buffy jumped to her feet and reached out to give Xander a hand up.
Giles spoke over Kennedy's cursing. "Buffy, what did you mean there might be another way?"
Before he could answer, a swirling cloud appeared in the center of the room. It cleared quickly, leaving behind a tall, robed figure. 'Eve' let out a scream of fury. "No! You are a servant of evil!"
Kennedy had ceased her struggles, staring at the new arrival wide eyed. Giles relieved her of her stake, then pushed her into a chair. "Stay. There," he said in a tone that brooked no argument. She nodded. He turned then to address the man in the center of the room. "It's good to see you again, my friend."
The mage acknowledged him with a tilt of his head. "And you, also." He turned to the First. "I serve only the balance. I received a summons here, and the Powers bid me come. And so I have."
Whistler spoke up. "There is the one who sought you out," he informed the mage, indicating Spike. The mage studied the vampire for a moment.
"His soul is not like that of the other. It is anchored. To remove it will require a large blood sacrifice."
"I'm sure Willy's got lots of blood up front," Xander offered. "How much do you need?"
"This cannot be done with the blood of animals. It must be preformed with the fresh blood of a willing person." His gaze traveled to Buffy. "He is connected to you."
She nodded slowly, and started to roll up a sleeve. Spike took a step forward.
"Wait just a soddin' minute! No one said anything about blood." He grabbed Buffy's shoulders, forcing her to look at him. "You don't have to do this. You could just stake me and be done with it." His face wore an agonized look. "You're probably just going to have to stake me afterwards anyway, pet. Don't put yourself through this. If you're weakened, I might end up killing you."
"You know he's right." Buffy gasped at the voice that spoke those words. She pulled free of Spike's grasp and looked over to find her mother standing there. "Honey, haven't you suffered enough? Just accept it. Stake him and it will all be over."
"I have just about had it with you," Whistler barked. The First morphed back into the form of Eve and raised an eyebrow at the demon.
Buffy drew a shuddering breath. "Can we please just do this?" she implored the mage.
Giles stepped up to her. "Are you absolutely certain about this, Buffy?" She nodded. He searched her face for any sign of doubt and found none. With a sigh, moved back to stand with Xander behind Kennedy.
The mage stepped forward and drew an ornately decorated blade from beneath his robes with one hand, a silver chalice with the other. Buffy extended her arm, and Xander turned his face away as the mage drew the knife quickly across her upturned wrist. He moved the chalice beneath the catch the blood as it spilled forth. It seemed like only moments before the chalice was full to overflowing.
Buffy staggered, the abrupt blood loss making her woozy. Spike started forward to catch her, but the mage stopped him. "It begins." With that, he splashed the contents all over the vampire, and his eyes began to glow.
Her blood was everywhere, some even dripping down his face, splattered on his lips. Spike tried to resist the temptation to lick them clean, but failed entirely. The taste of it was potent wine, and it burned through him like fire. His hands were covered with it, as he had reflexively raised them in an ineffectual attempt to ward off the mage. Without consciously thinking about it, he brought his fingers to his mouth, licking the sweet nectar from them as well. Dimly, he was aware of the mage chanting in the background. Then the pain hit.
Buffy clasped her hand over the bloody wound on her wrist and struggled desperately to remain upright. A moment later, there were strong arms wrapped around her, and she glanced back to find Xander there supporting her.
Her gaze wandered back to Spike, licking blood off his fingers. He was in full gameface, and looked completely dazed. Then his features twisted in agony and he convulsed, dropping to the floor.
"This one's hold on his soul is strong." The mage turned back to her with the chalice. "It requires more blood."
She heard Xander protesting, and Giles as well, but the all of her attention was on Spike, writhing on the floor. Silently, she removed her hand from the wound and extended her wrist again. "Whatever it takes," she whispered.
The knife slice into her wrist and she felt the blood begin to flow once more. Her vision grew fuzzy around the edges, but she never took her eyes off Spike. "Just fix it in a way that makes him not have to die."
"You... you really love him, don't you Buffy?"
The question seemed to come from a million miles away. She nodded. "I think I do, Xander."
She heard him sigh. "Oh, Buffy..."
She couldn't believe this was happening. They were just sitting there, watching that demon, or whatever it was, take Spike's soul away. As if he wasn't dangerous enough with it! And not just watching, in Buffy's case, but actively helping. She had to do something to stop it. That vampire was going to kill them all.
Kennedy watched for her chance. Buffy was incapacitated, and Xander was preoccupied with her. Giles was watching the proceedings with keen interest, and in contrast, herself not well at all. She glanced around and located her stake. There. On the table. If the watcher would just move over a little bit more...
As if obliging her, Giles took another half step over, trying to get a better view. Of what she didn't know - a demon chanting, a slayer bleeding, and a vampire having a seizure on the floor. What was to see? But she really didn't care. As soon as he was clear, she lunged forward, grabbed the stake and dove across the table in one smooth motion.
Giles reached for her, but was left clutching at empty air. She heard Buffy cry out, but nothing could stop her now. She rolled Spike onto his back, knelt down beside him, and raised her stake high.
The mage threw the final chalice of blood just as Kennedy sank to her knees beside Spike. It splattered all over her as well, breaking her concentration. Some of the thick fluid splashed in her eyes, temporarily blinding her.
Xander eased Buffy into a chair and started forward to pull the proto- slayer away from Spike. Just before he reached her, the mage finished his chant and stretched his arms out in front of him. Light poured from his hands to envelope Spike's body, and Kennedy was caught in the nimbus. She screamed as it threw her clear, and she landed in a heap by Xander's feet, unconscious. He slipped his hands under her arms and pulled her back around the table. Giles helped him get her into a seat.
By the time the men looked back over, it was finished. Giles walked over to the Mage. "Did it work?"
The man nodded, watching the vampire. "His soul is gone. He is fully demon once more." He turned to face Giles. "It is certainly a strange twist of events to find you seeking with one that which you sought to avoid with the other."
"I'll say."
"When last we parted, the balance restored was personal in nature. It is a novel experience to be involved in the restoration of the eternal balance between good and evil."
"Thank you, my friend."
The Mage bowed slightly. "Peace with you."
"And with you, also."
As Giles watched, he walked backwards and faded into thin air.
"That was way wiggy," commented Xander. "I think I like it better with the swirling smoke. The whole fade out thing is just creepy."
A whimper from Buffy caught their attention. Giles crouched down beside her. "How are you feeling?"
"Ohhhh. Like I just fought a dozen vamps." She tried to sit up. "Did it work? Is he okay?" She peered around, eyes apparently not focusing too well. "Where's the blue robed guy? And Kennedy!" Buffy lurched forward, almost falling out of her seat. "She was gonna stake Spike, I saw, and then there were flashing lights, and I think I passed out. What happened?"
Giles put up a hand to slow the tide of questions. "Kennedy did not stake Spike. The ritual succeeded. He no longer has his soul. "
"And?" she prodded. "Is he all evil now?"
"He's all unconscious now," Xander quipped, directing her attention to the figure still lying on the floor.
Buffy shook her head, struggling to think "And the First? Where did the it go?"
Whistler fielded that one. "Gone - for now."
She sighed and slumped back in the chair. "That doesn't sound as permanent as I was hoping," she complained, then looked at the demon through slitted eyes. "I thought this was supposed to restore balance."
He cocked his head to one side. "It did."
Giles frowned at him. "Then what, might I ask, is the problem exactly?"
Spike chose that moment to groan. "Bloody, buggering fuck!" he cursed as he rolled onto his side. He curled into fetal position facing them, hands going up to cradle his head. He continued to paint the air blue for a few moments, surprising and impressing both Xander and Giles with the scope of his cussing. When he finally quieted, the Watcher spoke.
"So, Spike," he asked without a hint of guile. "How are you feeling?"
"Fuck you, Rupert."
Xander tried not to laugh, coughed to cover it. Spike opened one eye just long enough to cast and evil look his way. "Fuck you too, whelp." The eye closed, and he clenched his teeth.
"Spike?"
At Buffy's voice, Spike's eyes snapped open, regardless of the pain he was feeling. "Yes, luv?" Despite his own condition, he realized immediately that she wasn't doing to well herself. He forced himself to sit up. "Buffy? Are you alright?"
She smiled wanly. "Oh, is this the evil, demon who was going to kill me as soon as he got de-souled?"
He grunted. "It didn't work."
They all gaped at him.
Giles protested. "The Mage said the ritual was a success."
"I don't bloody well care what he said, Giles." Spike let out a snort. "I don't feel any different at all." He scowled at the floor. "Still feel it. The weight of all the things I've done. It's still sittin' on me, like an ocean of guilt. I shouldn't feel that without the soul."
Whistler pulled out a chair and sat down in front of him. "That's just your conscience."
"I'm a DEMON! A vampire. Vamps don't have a bleedin' conscience."
"Alright, not exactly, no. But you have the imprint of one. It's not something you'll ever be able to forget. Without a soul, it never occurred to you to feel guilt for anything. Why should you have?" Whistler looked at him shrewdly. "But you were already learning to, weren't you? It's why you went seeking the soul in the first place."
Spike grudgingly agreed. "Okay, that makes sense." He grunted again. "So. I'm soul free, am I?" He gingerly rose to his feet, and looked around the room. His gaze settled on Kennedy, and his expression went hard. He took a step towards her, death in his eye. Giles stood up in alarm. "Spike!"
He stopped short, tearing his eyes away from the young woman to look at the Watcher. "Well," he said grimly. "Looks like I am after all. Soul free, I mean. Had a real urge to rip that bint's throat out." He hung his head. "Conscience won't do me a bleedin' bit of good if I get provoked. You know me. Always flying off half-cocked. At least the chip made sure I couldn't hurt anyone."
Buffy looked pensively at Spike for a minute, then turned to Whistler. "You never answered."
He gave her a slow smile. "Attentive girl." He leaned back in the chair and folded his hands across his stomach, legs stretched out in front of him.
She looked at him expectantly. "Well?"
"Well what?"
She sighed. "What is the problem? Why isn't the First gone for good? Why does it feel like there is still a 'maybe it will be back' hanging over our heads?"
"How about this," he countered. "What just changed?"
She gave him a funny look. "Spike lost his soul."
"What didn't?"
She felt all the hairs on the back of her neck stand straight up as she considered the question. Whistler leaned in close to her and spoke in a very soft voice, one that only she could hear. "Yeah. He's back where he was when this first started, kid. He's an unsouled, evil demon - and he loves you. The balance between good and evil may have been restored, but the forces surrounding the slayer line in general, and the two of you specifically are still unstable. And like he said, there is nothing in him serving as a moral compass anymore. The only guide he has is his desire to become the man he thinks you would want him to be - which, believe it or not, was your gift to him. So tell me, Slayer, are you going to choose to love with all of your soul, or pull away from it?"
Buffy's stared at him mutely, the words her spirit guide had spoken a year earlier coming back to haunt her.
The demon abruptly rose to his feet. "Well, my job is done here. The rest is up to you kids." He straightened his hat, then glanced down at Buffy one last time. "Just a word to the wise, kiddo. If you leave this thing unresolved, it's likely to come back and bite you on the ass. Make a choice." There was a flash and a pop and Whistler was gone.
"Man, I hate it when they do that!" Xander griped. "Is it too much to ask for them to walk out of a room before they go poof and vanish?"
Buffy's gaze was fixed on Spike. He'd settled into a chair against the back wall, head resting against the wall, eyes closed. She considered what Whistler had said, and searched her heart. She knew what she had to do.
She forced herself to her feet. Giles appeared instantly at her side, putting out a hand to support her. "You should rest, Buffy. Let us take you home."
She shook her head, and brushed his arm away. "No, Giles. Take Kennedy and go home. I have to finish this."
He opened his mouth to argue with her, but her pleading look silenced him. He gave her a curt nod. He motioned to Xander to come with him. The two of them roused the proto-slayer and escorted her from the room.
Spike opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. "You gonna finish this then?" He finally looked at her. She nodded.
He rose slowly and came over to stand before her. Their eyes locked for a moment, then he abruptly bent down and retrieved Kennedy's stake from the floor and held it out to her.
"Go on, then," he bit out. "Get it over with." There was pain evident in his face, and anger. And an overwhelming sadness that bespoke of a great, unrequited love. "Don't want to give the First any opportunity to make me muck things up again."
She stared down at the stake, then back up at him. "You're just so sure that this is what I'm planning to do."
His nostrils flared. "Well, innit?" he demanded. "He told you to make a choice. I know how you feel about me. Or don't more like. The whole reason I went and got that sodding soul in the first place was to be good enough for you, because I sure couldn't go on the way I was." He laughed bitterly. "And look how well that turned out. In my quest to be worthy, I managed to get a whole whack of potential slayers and the bloody council of wankers killed! I haven't caused that much carnage as an unsouled, evil demon in years, Buffy! And now I'm right back where I was. I can't live like this." He shoved the stake at her again. "Take the damn thing and do your bloody job!"
She knocked the stake from his hand. "I'm not killing you, Spike."
"News flash, you stupid bint. Already dead. Just need you to finish me off." He retrieved the stake, this time grabbing her hand and wrapping her fingers around it before placing it directly over his heart. "Fucking well DO it already!" he yelled.
She tore her hand free from his and threw the stake as hard as she could across the room. It embedded itself several inches into the wall. Then she screamed back. "You are the most irritating, insufferable, unreasonable person I know! And you're my gift! And I'm keeping you!"
He blinked. Tilted his head to one side, expression of disbelief stealing across his face. Blinked once more. "Say that again?"
"You stupid vampire!" She let out a huff of frustration. "How long is it going to take you to get it?" Her expression softened, and her voice grew gentle. " It's taken me a long time to figure this one out. But I get it now, I really do. Anya said we were yin and yang. I didn't want to accept it, but it's true. You balance me out, Spike. You know me better than anyone else. You've always got my back." She placed a hand on his chest. "I know you love me. And... " She looked up into his face and saw dread and hope, fear and joy. "I think I love you, Spike. I'm not very good at love. I don't think I do it well. But I'm willing to try, to take the chance."
His voice was harsh, strained. "You had better be absolutely sure about this, Buffy. I'm not willing to be the guilty secret anymore. I can't do that again, I won't."
She pressed into him, slipping her other hand up to the back of his neck, running her fingers through the silky curls she had missed so much. "I'm sure."
With a groan, he caught her up in his arms, crushing her to him as he lowered his mouth to hers. The kiss was passionate, yet sweet in a way that their kisses had never been before. Buffy realized that the sweetness was because she wanted to be in his arms with no reservations for the very first time ever. Then it intensified and Buffy couldn't think about anything at all.
Whistler watched the two of them from the dimension he was presently in and smiled. It was good to see she'd made the right choice. The slayer and her vampire were so wrapped up in each other they would hardly notice and earthquake, but Whistler could feel it - the mystical energies around them were beginning to stabilize. The energies would forever be altered because of the vampire, but they were growing strong again, and the First would never again be able to attack the line of the Chosen through this avenue.
The demon turned away, satisfied, then turned his attention to the Powers. Hmm. Interesting. Seemed like there were portentous events going down in LA. And... Angelus? He shook his head. Souled vampires, always getting into mischief. He hummed a jaunty tune and headed off to see what kind of trouble Angel was involved in this time.
fin
It instantaneously transported itself to the Summers home just in time to see the Slayer and her friends leave with one of the proto-slayers in tow. It flitted inside to check up on the other potentials. As it listened in on the conversation between those left behind, it was filled with evil glee. So close to its goal, it had been thwarted by Whistler - and now Buffy was charging off with just enough misinformation to make a fatal mistake and leave the Chosen line open for complete destruction. Things could not get any better if it had planned them this way.
Buffy and Xander were arguing about where to go. "I say the high school, Buff. If he's wigging out, it makes sense that he'd go somewhere that felt familiar."
"We went with that idea and checked the crypt first. No Spike," she reminded him. "I still say that unsouled Spike went on a bender when he was depressed, and the souled version is likely to do the same thing."
"Why don't you guys go check the High School, and let Buffy and me check the demon bar?" Kennedy suggested. Buffy just gave her a look.
Giles spoke up. "I would tend to agree that the pub is a more logical option."
"Thank you, Giles." Buffy gave Xander a smirk. "See? Psychology girl, that's me."
"Actually, it's more that being English, the local is the first place one would be likely to head after earth shattering news. But your idea has merit as well."
Buffy rolled her eyes, then started out down the street, leading them towards Willy's. Kennedy fell into step beside her, the two of them pulling a moderate distance ahead of the rest of the team.
"So what's the plan?" she asked. "Just walk up and stake him? You don't think he's just going to let you do it, do you?"
Buffy gave her a sidelong glance and kept walking. "Yes, as a matter of fact, I do. I think that if I walked up and told him to pull his shirt open so that I could get a better aim, he'd do that exactly that. And he'd turn his face away from me so that I wouldn't even have to look him in the eye while I did it."
Kennedy frowned. "I don't get it, Buffy. I don't understand you, and I sure as hell don't understand him. None of this is covered in the Slayer's Handbook."
Buffy chuckled. "That's what they keep telling me. I wouldn't know. I've never read the damn thing."
"That explains a lot." Kennedy kicked a stone and watched it skittering along in front of them. "My Watcher made it all seem so black and white. Good, Evil. Kill Vampires. Kill demons. Live on the edge, die young. But you..." Kennedy shook her head. "Giles has told us a few things. Dawn filled in a lot of blanks that he wouldn't. And between the things that Willow, Xander and Anya have said or hinted at, it sounds like you go out of your way to break the rules."
"No, not really," Buffy clarified. "Like I said, no handbook. I never knew the rules, so I made up my own. I drove Giles crazy and I really pissed off the council a bunch of times. I kinda felt bad about Giles, but... did you ever meet Travers?"
"Once." Kennedy smiled. "You pissed him off? That's cool."
"Yeah, I felt pretty good about it."
They were quiet for a few moments, but Kennedy continued, curiosity getting the best of her. "I just don't understand how you ended up sleeping with a vampire." There was distaste evident in her tone. "I mean, okay - Dawn told us about Angel, and I sort of understand, being that he had a soul, and was fighting by your side from the beginning and all... but Spike? He was evil." She gave Buffy a searching look. "Why?"
Buffy sighed. "It's a long, complicated story. The simplest way to explain it is that Spike loved me, but he didn't expect anything from me. I needed to be loved without expectations and demands." Her expression was solemn as she caught the other girl's gaze. "Spike has always been more complex then other vampires I have known. He's been a pain in my ass many times because he could always see past the bullshit and get right to the heart of the matter - even when no one else wanted to see the truth. He knew that Willow was in trouble before any of us did, tried to tell us - no one listened. He knows all of us a lot better than we're comfortable with. And he tells the truth." A smiled played around her lips. "That's probably mostly because he's a lousy liar, but still."
"And you love him?"
"I... I don't really know how I feel about him. I care, I have to admit that." Her face got hard again. "But it doesn't matter anymore. What matters is that I have to do this. He'll understand." The last part seemed more like a plea that he would than certain knowledge. She came to a halt.
"Buffy?"
She pointed to the entranceway to a dingy looking building. "We're here."
Willy looked up as he heard the door open. "What can I get... oh. Slayer." He smiled nervously. "How can I help you?"
"Where's Spike?"
His gaze darted nervously to the back before returning to her face. "Spike? Uhm, haven't seen him in ages. Couldn't tell you."
Buffy stepped up to the bar and fingered the charred cotton blanket draped over one of the bar stools. "Willy. Where. Is. Spike? Don't make me ask you again."
He sighed. "In the back."
As she turned to make her way across the room, Willie spoke again, this time addressing Kennedy. "Hey, you're new around here." He eyed her speculatively. "I don't suppose you're interested in making a few bucks? I have a cousin who's a photographer..."
Kennedy scowled at him. He gulped. "Or maybe not."
The group of them walked to the back of the bar and stopped in front of the door to the back room. Buffy turned to face them. "Look, you guys. I appreciate that you are here for me and all. But I really need to do this alone."
Xander started to protest, but Giles stilled him with a look. "We'll wait right here. If you need us, just call."
"I'm going in with you," Kennedy disagreed.
Buffy shook her head. "Kennedy, I promise you, if I need help to do this, I will call you. Please let me talk to him alone. I owe him that much."
The other girl looked ready to argue the point, but backed down. "Fine. But don't take too long, or I'm coming in, invited or not."
Buffy stepped through the door and pulled it closed behind her with a solid click. Spike was sitting alone at the poker table, his eyes closed. She noted that he looked tired, the dark shadows of bruises still adorning his face.
"S'bout time," he spoke, eyes still closed. "Startin' to wonder if you were ever gonna..." he trailed off, cracked an eye open. When he saw her, he bolted upright. "Buffy? What are you doin' here, luv?"
"Looking for you."
"Huh. Well, you found me. Listen, pet, I'm waiting to see a bloke. It's important. Would you mind...." He realized she was trying not to cry, and failing. "Buffy?" He got out of the chair and walked over to her. "What's wrong luv?"
She raised her moist eyes to meet his concerned blue ones, and her heart constricted within her. "You heard what Anya said."
He nodded. "I did."
"We talked about it." She looked away, unable to hold his gaze. "We... Willow, Xander, Giles even... me. I think - I think Anya was right. So this is all my fault."
"You had to do what you thought was best, Buffy. It's not your fault."
"And now it's too late," she went on as if he hadn't spoken at all. "It doesn't even matter if I love you or not, because the damage is done. You went out and got a soul to prove yourself to me, and now everything is messed up."
Spike was looking at the floor now. "I'm sorry I screwed things up, luv. I want to try and fix it. That's why-"
"It's too late to fix it," she whispered. "Giles was right. There is only one way to stabilize the Balance." She pulled the stake out of her jacket pocket and held it out in front of her, staring at it. Light glinted off the highly polished wood. "I don't want to. But I have to."
Spike considered telling her about the soul stealer, but only for a moment. It was probably better this way. Without his soul or the chip, he really wasn't sure if he'd be able to keep from turning evil again. It was so much easier to just let the demon be in control and to stop striving. What he'd done to Buffy the previous spring was a testament to that. And there was certainly no possibility of ever earning Buffy's love the way he was before.
Slowly, he began to unbutton his shirt. Buffy looked up as the movement caught her eye. "Just want to make sure you have a clear target, luv." Tears rolled unchecked down her face as he continued. "Don't cry, pet. Just strike hard and true." He pulled his shirt open, tilted his head back and closed his eyes. "Do it, Buffy.
She started to weep in earnest, and lifted the stake. "I'm so sorry," she sobbed. "I wish there was some other way. I have no choice!"
"Don't you?"
Buffy whirled around, and her stake clattered to the floor. "Whistler?"
"Well? Time's a wastin'."
She was nonplussed. "What... what do you mean?"
"Choices, Slayer. Do you honestly believe you have no other choice?"
Spike growled at the other demon. "Don't make things any more difficult for her than they already are, mate!"
Whistler clucked his tongue and wagged his finger at the vampire. "You've been a dishonest boy, William. Don't you have anything that you want to tell her?"
Buffy swiveled around to face Spike again. "Tell me what?" Her voice quavered.
Spike slumped forward and hung his head. "S'not important, Buffy. It really is better this way."
"Tell. Me. WHAT?" she ground out.
He sighed. "I was here to meet with the soul stealer." He glanced up at her. "Figured if getting' the soul was what mucked everything up, maybe getting rid of it would make things right again." He snorted in derision. "But I reckon I'll just muck that up, too. Buffy, without a soul - well, Spike's not fixed anymore, you know that. And I remember what Angelus was like when he lost his soul. Demon was half crazed. I'm thinkin' mine might be a little crazed after being trapped in here for the last few months." He dropped his gaze from hers. "Rather have you stake me now, luv. Then you could remember me like this, not as a evil thing trying to kill you."
Kennedy stood up and marched towards the door. "I'm going in there."
Giles arm shot out to bar the way. "Wait."
"It's been 10 minutes already. How long does it take to stake a vampire?"
"If she needs your help, she'll call you."
"What if he fooled her? What if she thought he was okay and let her guard down and he got the drop on her? What if she's lying there dead on the carpet right now?"
Xander looked a little nervous at the idea, but Giles stood firm. "We wait."
"I don't think the Watcher is very concerned with your safety," came a soft, southern accented voice from behind them. They turned to find Eve standing there. 'She' addressed Kennedy directly. "I think the only one he really cares about is his slayer."
The girl's hand tightened convulsively around her stake. Giles noted the movement.
"Kennedy. Don't forget this is the First. It is not interested in anything but seeing you and all the others dead. Anything it has to say is suspect."
"Spike has to die," she reasoned, gaze still locked with 'Eve's'. "We agreed on that. It wouldn't hurt to go and see what's going on." With that, the girl darted past Giles's outstretched arm and pushed the door open. Her mouth turned down into a grimace when she saw Spike standing there. "I knew it." She started towards him. Buffy blocked her way.
"You can't do it, can you?" she sneered. "He's your lover and so you're going to sacrifice us all to save him!"
"No, it's not like that," Buffy insisted. "There might be another way."
Giles and Xander followed Kennedy into the room and tried to intercept her, but she evaded them and rushed Buffy, momentum sending them crashing across the room.
'Eve' sauntered in, smirking. "You were right," she continued. "The Slayer doesn't seem to be able to do her job anymore. Looks like someone has to step in and do the job for her."
Xander waded into the fray and earned a kick in the jaw that sent him sprawling. Giles managed to get an arm around Kennedy's waist and pulled her, kicking and screaming, off Buffy.
"Okay, that's enough, Morphy." Whistler intervened. "Leave it alone."
'Eve' glared at him. "You have been aiding the slayer."
"I have not and you know it. I'm allowed to ask questions. I'm not answering any. You, on the other hand, are provoking the girl."
Buffy jumped to her feet and reached out to give Xander a hand up.
Giles spoke over Kennedy's cursing. "Buffy, what did you mean there might be another way?"
Before he could answer, a swirling cloud appeared in the center of the room. It cleared quickly, leaving behind a tall, robed figure. 'Eve' let out a scream of fury. "No! You are a servant of evil!"
Kennedy had ceased her struggles, staring at the new arrival wide eyed. Giles relieved her of her stake, then pushed her into a chair. "Stay. There," he said in a tone that brooked no argument. She nodded. He turned then to address the man in the center of the room. "It's good to see you again, my friend."
The mage acknowledged him with a tilt of his head. "And you, also." He turned to the First. "I serve only the balance. I received a summons here, and the Powers bid me come. And so I have."
Whistler spoke up. "There is the one who sought you out," he informed the mage, indicating Spike. The mage studied the vampire for a moment.
"His soul is not like that of the other. It is anchored. To remove it will require a large blood sacrifice."
"I'm sure Willy's got lots of blood up front," Xander offered. "How much do you need?"
"This cannot be done with the blood of animals. It must be preformed with the fresh blood of a willing person." His gaze traveled to Buffy. "He is connected to you."
She nodded slowly, and started to roll up a sleeve. Spike took a step forward.
"Wait just a soddin' minute! No one said anything about blood." He grabbed Buffy's shoulders, forcing her to look at him. "You don't have to do this. You could just stake me and be done with it." His face wore an agonized look. "You're probably just going to have to stake me afterwards anyway, pet. Don't put yourself through this. If you're weakened, I might end up killing you."
"You know he's right." Buffy gasped at the voice that spoke those words. She pulled free of Spike's grasp and looked over to find her mother standing there. "Honey, haven't you suffered enough? Just accept it. Stake him and it will all be over."
"I have just about had it with you," Whistler barked. The First morphed back into the form of Eve and raised an eyebrow at the demon.
Buffy drew a shuddering breath. "Can we please just do this?" she implored the mage.
Giles stepped up to her. "Are you absolutely certain about this, Buffy?" She nodded. He searched her face for any sign of doubt and found none. With a sigh, moved back to stand with Xander behind Kennedy.
The mage stepped forward and drew an ornately decorated blade from beneath his robes with one hand, a silver chalice with the other. Buffy extended her arm, and Xander turned his face away as the mage drew the knife quickly across her upturned wrist. He moved the chalice beneath the catch the blood as it spilled forth. It seemed like only moments before the chalice was full to overflowing.
Buffy staggered, the abrupt blood loss making her woozy. Spike started forward to catch her, but the mage stopped him. "It begins." With that, he splashed the contents all over the vampire, and his eyes began to glow.
Her blood was everywhere, some even dripping down his face, splattered on his lips. Spike tried to resist the temptation to lick them clean, but failed entirely. The taste of it was potent wine, and it burned through him like fire. His hands were covered with it, as he had reflexively raised them in an ineffectual attempt to ward off the mage. Without consciously thinking about it, he brought his fingers to his mouth, licking the sweet nectar from them as well. Dimly, he was aware of the mage chanting in the background. Then the pain hit.
Buffy clasped her hand over the bloody wound on her wrist and struggled desperately to remain upright. A moment later, there were strong arms wrapped around her, and she glanced back to find Xander there supporting her.
Her gaze wandered back to Spike, licking blood off his fingers. He was in full gameface, and looked completely dazed. Then his features twisted in agony and he convulsed, dropping to the floor.
"This one's hold on his soul is strong." The mage turned back to her with the chalice. "It requires more blood."
She heard Xander protesting, and Giles as well, but the all of her attention was on Spike, writhing on the floor. Silently, she removed her hand from the wound and extended her wrist again. "Whatever it takes," she whispered.
The knife slice into her wrist and she felt the blood begin to flow once more. Her vision grew fuzzy around the edges, but she never took her eyes off Spike. "Just fix it in a way that makes him not have to die."
"You... you really love him, don't you Buffy?"
The question seemed to come from a million miles away. She nodded. "I think I do, Xander."
She heard him sigh. "Oh, Buffy..."
She couldn't believe this was happening. They were just sitting there, watching that demon, or whatever it was, take Spike's soul away. As if he wasn't dangerous enough with it! And not just watching, in Buffy's case, but actively helping. She had to do something to stop it. That vampire was going to kill them all.
Kennedy watched for her chance. Buffy was incapacitated, and Xander was preoccupied with her. Giles was watching the proceedings with keen interest, and in contrast, herself not well at all. She glanced around and located her stake. There. On the table. If the watcher would just move over a little bit more...
As if obliging her, Giles took another half step over, trying to get a better view. Of what she didn't know - a demon chanting, a slayer bleeding, and a vampire having a seizure on the floor. What was to see? But she really didn't care. As soon as he was clear, she lunged forward, grabbed the stake and dove across the table in one smooth motion.
Giles reached for her, but was left clutching at empty air. She heard Buffy cry out, but nothing could stop her now. She rolled Spike onto his back, knelt down beside him, and raised her stake high.
The mage threw the final chalice of blood just as Kennedy sank to her knees beside Spike. It splattered all over her as well, breaking her concentration. Some of the thick fluid splashed in her eyes, temporarily blinding her.
Xander eased Buffy into a chair and started forward to pull the proto- slayer away from Spike. Just before he reached her, the mage finished his chant and stretched his arms out in front of him. Light poured from his hands to envelope Spike's body, and Kennedy was caught in the nimbus. She screamed as it threw her clear, and she landed in a heap by Xander's feet, unconscious. He slipped his hands under her arms and pulled her back around the table. Giles helped him get her into a seat.
By the time the men looked back over, it was finished. Giles walked over to the Mage. "Did it work?"
The man nodded, watching the vampire. "His soul is gone. He is fully demon once more." He turned to face Giles. "It is certainly a strange twist of events to find you seeking with one that which you sought to avoid with the other."
"I'll say."
"When last we parted, the balance restored was personal in nature. It is a novel experience to be involved in the restoration of the eternal balance between good and evil."
"Thank you, my friend."
The Mage bowed slightly. "Peace with you."
"And with you, also."
As Giles watched, he walked backwards and faded into thin air.
"That was way wiggy," commented Xander. "I think I like it better with the swirling smoke. The whole fade out thing is just creepy."
A whimper from Buffy caught their attention. Giles crouched down beside her. "How are you feeling?"
"Ohhhh. Like I just fought a dozen vamps." She tried to sit up. "Did it work? Is he okay?" She peered around, eyes apparently not focusing too well. "Where's the blue robed guy? And Kennedy!" Buffy lurched forward, almost falling out of her seat. "She was gonna stake Spike, I saw, and then there were flashing lights, and I think I passed out. What happened?"
Giles put up a hand to slow the tide of questions. "Kennedy did not stake Spike. The ritual succeeded. He no longer has his soul. "
"And?" she prodded. "Is he all evil now?"
"He's all unconscious now," Xander quipped, directing her attention to the figure still lying on the floor.
Buffy shook her head, struggling to think "And the First? Where did the it go?"
Whistler fielded that one. "Gone - for now."
She sighed and slumped back in the chair. "That doesn't sound as permanent as I was hoping," she complained, then looked at the demon through slitted eyes. "I thought this was supposed to restore balance."
He cocked his head to one side. "It did."
Giles frowned at him. "Then what, might I ask, is the problem exactly?"
Spike chose that moment to groan. "Bloody, buggering fuck!" he cursed as he rolled onto his side. He curled into fetal position facing them, hands going up to cradle his head. He continued to paint the air blue for a few moments, surprising and impressing both Xander and Giles with the scope of his cussing. When he finally quieted, the Watcher spoke.
"So, Spike," he asked without a hint of guile. "How are you feeling?"
"Fuck you, Rupert."
Xander tried not to laugh, coughed to cover it. Spike opened one eye just long enough to cast and evil look his way. "Fuck you too, whelp." The eye closed, and he clenched his teeth.
"Spike?"
At Buffy's voice, Spike's eyes snapped open, regardless of the pain he was feeling. "Yes, luv?" Despite his own condition, he realized immediately that she wasn't doing to well herself. He forced himself to sit up. "Buffy? Are you alright?"
She smiled wanly. "Oh, is this the evil, demon who was going to kill me as soon as he got de-souled?"
He grunted. "It didn't work."
They all gaped at him.
Giles protested. "The Mage said the ritual was a success."
"I don't bloody well care what he said, Giles." Spike let out a snort. "I don't feel any different at all." He scowled at the floor. "Still feel it. The weight of all the things I've done. It's still sittin' on me, like an ocean of guilt. I shouldn't feel that without the soul."
Whistler pulled out a chair and sat down in front of him. "That's just your conscience."
"I'm a DEMON! A vampire. Vamps don't have a bleedin' conscience."
"Alright, not exactly, no. But you have the imprint of one. It's not something you'll ever be able to forget. Without a soul, it never occurred to you to feel guilt for anything. Why should you have?" Whistler looked at him shrewdly. "But you were already learning to, weren't you? It's why you went seeking the soul in the first place."
Spike grudgingly agreed. "Okay, that makes sense." He grunted again. "So. I'm soul free, am I?" He gingerly rose to his feet, and looked around the room. His gaze settled on Kennedy, and his expression went hard. He took a step towards her, death in his eye. Giles stood up in alarm. "Spike!"
He stopped short, tearing his eyes away from the young woman to look at the Watcher. "Well," he said grimly. "Looks like I am after all. Soul free, I mean. Had a real urge to rip that bint's throat out." He hung his head. "Conscience won't do me a bleedin' bit of good if I get provoked. You know me. Always flying off half-cocked. At least the chip made sure I couldn't hurt anyone."
Buffy looked pensively at Spike for a minute, then turned to Whistler. "You never answered."
He gave her a slow smile. "Attentive girl." He leaned back in the chair and folded his hands across his stomach, legs stretched out in front of him.
She looked at him expectantly. "Well?"
"Well what?"
She sighed. "What is the problem? Why isn't the First gone for good? Why does it feel like there is still a 'maybe it will be back' hanging over our heads?"
"How about this," he countered. "What just changed?"
She gave him a funny look. "Spike lost his soul."
"What didn't?"
She felt all the hairs on the back of her neck stand straight up as she considered the question. Whistler leaned in close to her and spoke in a very soft voice, one that only she could hear. "Yeah. He's back where he was when this first started, kid. He's an unsouled, evil demon - and he loves you. The balance between good and evil may have been restored, but the forces surrounding the slayer line in general, and the two of you specifically are still unstable. And like he said, there is nothing in him serving as a moral compass anymore. The only guide he has is his desire to become the man he thinks you would want him to be - which, believe it or not, was your gift to him. So tell me, Slayer, are you going to choose to love with all of your soul, or pull away from it?"
Buffy's stared at him mutely, the words her spirit guide had spoken a year earlier coming back to haunt her.
The demon abruptly rose to his feet. "Well, my job is done here. The rest is up to you kids." He straightened his hat, then glanced down at Buffy one last time. "Just a word to the wise, kiddo. If you leave this thing unresolved, it's likely to come back and bite you on the ass. Make a choice." There was a flash and a pop and Whistler was gone.
"Man, I hate it when they do that!" Xander griped. "Is it too much to ask for them to walk out of a room before they go poof and vanish?"
Buffy's gaze was fixed on Spike. He'd settled into a chair against the back wall, head resting against the wall, eyes closed. She considered what Whistler had said, and searched her heart. She knew what she had to do.
She forced herself to her feet. Giles appeared instantly at her side, putting out a hand to support her. "You should rest, Buffy. Let us take you home."
She shook her head, and brushed his arm away. "No, Giles. Take Kennedy and go home. I have to finish this."
He opened his mouth to argue with her, but her pleading look silenced him. He gave her a curt nod. He motioned to Xander to come with him. The two of them roused the proto-slayer and escorted her from the room.
Spike opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. "You gonna finish this then?" He finally looked at her. She nodded.
He rose slowly and came over to stand before her. Their eyes locked for a moment, then he abruptly bent down and retrieved Kennedy's stake from the floor and held it out to her.
"Go on, then," he bit out. "Get it over with." There was pain evident in his face, and anger. And an overwhelming sadness that bespoke of a great, unrequited love. "Don't want to give the First any opportunity to make me muck things up again."
She stared down at the stake, then back up at him. "You're just so sure that this is what I'm planning to do."
His nostrils flared. "Well, innit?" he demanded. "He told you to make a choice. I know how you feel about me. Or don't more like. The whole reason I went and got that sodding soul in the first place was to be good enough for you, because I sure couldn't go on the way I was." He laughed bitterly. "And look how well that turned out. In my quest to be worthy, I managed to get a whole whack of potential slayers and the bloody council of wankers killed! I haven't caused that much carnage as an unsouled, evil demon in years, Buffy! And now I'm right back where I was. I can't live like this." He shoved the stake at her again. "Take the damn thing and do your bloody job!"
She knocked the stake from his hand. "I'm not killing you, Spike."
"News flash, you stupid bint. Already dead. Just need you to finish me off." He retrieved the stake, this time grabbing her hand and wrapping her fingers around it before placing it directly over his heart. "Fucking well DO it already!" he yelled.
She tore her hand free from his and threw the stake as hard as she could across the room. It embedded itself several inches into the wall. Then she screamed back. "You are the most irritating, insufferable, unreasonable person I know! And you're my gift! And I'm keeping you!"
He blinked. Tilted his head to one side, expression of disbelief stealing across his face. Blinked once more. "Say that again?"
"You stupid vampire!" She let out a huff of frustration. "How long is it going to take you to get it?" Her expression softened, and her voice grew gentle. " It's taken me a long time to figure this one out. But I get it now, I really do. Anya said we were yin and yang. I didn't want to accept it, but it's true. You balance me out, Spike. You know me better than anyone else. You've always got my back." She placed a hand on his chest. "I know you love me. And... " She looked up into his face and saw dread and hope, fear and joy. "I think I love you, Spike. I'm not very good at love. I don't think I do it well. But I'm willing to try, to take the chance."
His voice was harsh, strained. "You had better be absolutely sure about this, Buffy. I'm not willing to be the guilty secret anymore. I can't do that again, I won't."
She pressed into him, slipping her other hand up to the back of his neck, running her fingers through the silky curls she had missed so much. "I'm sure."
With a groan, he caught her up in his arms, crushing her to him as he lowered his mouth to hers. The kiss was passionate, yet sweet in a way that their kisses had never been before. Buffy realized that the sweetness was because she wanted to be in his arms with no reservations for the very first time ever. Then it intensified and Buffy couldn't think about anything at all.
Whistler watched the two of them from the dimension he was presently in and smiled. It was good to see she'd made the right choice. The slayer and her vampire were so wrapped up in each other they would hardly notice and earthquake, but Whistler could feel it - the mystical energies around them were beginning to stabilize. The energies would forever be altered because of the vampire, but they were growing strong again, and the First would never again be able to attack the line of the Chosen through this avenue.
The demon turned away, satisfied, then turned his attention to the Powers. Hmm. Interesting. Seemed like there were portentous events going down in LA. And... Angelus? He shook his head. Souled vampires, always getting into mischief. He hummed a jaunty tune and headed off to see what kind of trouble Angel was involved in this time.
fin