IOHITF - WARNING!!! Contains Legolas-mocking!!!
E/N: Yes, I'm back. Be afraid, be very afraid... heheh. Sorry I took this long. Endomiel's been distracting me a lot lately. Ever since we discovered Moria in our school, she wants me to help her find the exact location of Mirkwood, or Thranduil's palace to be more precise... so terribly tiring. Personally I'd much rather look for the Shire, huge blue eyes, a Ringbearer, and as a bonus a Scottish accent. So I'm a pervy hobbit fancier, so what?! We've already discovered a Hobbit running through the school, and I've been trying to catch him so that I can force him to tell me where the Shire is. As a result I did not have much time to write left. Also there are our dealings with the Diabolical Mathematics Teacher of Doom aka Sauron. We are making plans for a paint bomb. But first, a new chapter. Enjoy.
Love, peace and a paperclip,
-xxx- Elvea
Disclaimer: I do not own anything that New Line Cinema or Tolkien Enterprises already owns *sobs* and I am not gaining any other profit out of writing this than (positive) reviews and a good laugh when I think of a new cruel way to annoy Legolas. So there.
This chapter is dedicated to Orlando Bloom, because I feel sorry for him. Yes, sorry. Imagine finding a story on your character on the Web, and then finding out the author tortures him in terrible ways... well he probably hasn't read this, but if he has (which I greatly doubt) and is still (brave enough to be) reading the rest of the story: Mr. Bloom, my most sincere apologies for giving you a possible shock, mental damage and serious damage on your ego. I didn't mean to hurt you like this at all. It's supposed to hurt much, much more =P. Gee aren't I nice? o:)
"With that he (A/N: Legolas) sprang forth nimbly, and then Frodo noticed as if for the first time, though he had long known it, that the Elf had no boots, but wore only light shoes, as he always did, and his feet made little imprint in the snow." (the Fellowship of the Ring, by J.R.R. Tolkien, book 2 - chapter 3; The Ring Goes South)
"A smaller and lighter horse, but restive and fiery, was brought to Legolas. Arod was his name. But Legolas asked them to take off the saddle and rein. 'I need them not,' he said, and leaped lightly up, and to their wonder Arod was tame and willing beneath him, moving here and there with but a spoken word: such was the elvish way with all good beasts." (the Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien, book 3 - chapter 2; The Riders of Rohan)
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Chapter 3 - Detour to Mirkwood
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~*~ Legolas's POV ~*~
Hate. What a lame word for a feeling that can grow so strong. I hate Elena, I seriously hate her. I thought that what I felt before couldn't grow any stronger, but after what she did yesterday I keep suppressing my urge to kill her. If it wasn't for the fact that Elves don't just go and kill people because they're a peaceful people, and I'm a bloody Elven prince, she'd be pretty much dead right now.
Also, I don't want to disappoint Aragorn and Arwen. Before we left Minas Tirith they had explicitly told me that they had good faith in me and trusted me not to kill the little bitch. They probably expected her, along the road, to do what she did, especially after what she'd done with the wine that night at dinner.
Oh sure, I wasn't making it very easy for her either, certainly not after yesterday, I know that. But she deserves it. And she's going to pay dearly for what she did, I'll make sure of it. She didn't get anything to eat since yesterday morning, which must mean she's probably been starving all day. The look on her face as she sat watching me make my dinner confirmed that.
I took a bite of my bread, pulling a face of ecstasy whilst eating it. She hungrily stared at the bread in my hand for a moment, then turned her gaze towards the small pool not far from where we sat. Suddenly she stood up and walked to the pool, without saying even a single word. She started washing her face with the water from the pool. I grinned. I didn't allow her to bathe anymore either. Okay, so I didn't allow her to do that anyway, it was a pretty good way to get back on her.
'I'm bored' she suddenly said, breaking the silence between us.
'Not my problem' I replied. As if I care about that.
'There's nothing to do around here' she went on. I sighed. When was she finally gonna stop nagging?
'Didn't you just cover that by stating that you're bored?'
'Shut up! What I was saying, before you *rudely* interrupted me, is that there's no adventure here...'
'What's that supposed to mean?'
'There's no action, nothing happens, there are no orcs, no giant spiders... there's no DANGER...' she said with some sort of dreamy, absentminded look in her eyes. This once again proves that she's completely insane.
'So? Would you want that then?'
'Duh. Right now this is practically the same as a trip to my grandparents' she stated.
'Fine' I said, suppressing my upcoming grin. 'We'll go through Mirkwood'
~*~ Elena's POV ~*~
'Behold' Legolas said, 'the great river Onodló'
'Do you really have to say it so melodramatic?' I asked, not bothering to hide my boredom. A river. Yay.
'This happens to be the river Entwash' he said whilst glaring at me, 'and we are going to cross it'
'Oh goody' I responded sarcastically. It had been seven days since the "incident", and in those seven days we'd hardly spoken to each other, and I have lived on a couple of slices of bread and a few liters of water in total. Legging-las is so generous...yeah right. I always thought that Wood- elves are nice to their prisoners? Tolkien's mistake, obviously... or Legolas is the exception that confirms the rule. Either way, basically it meant that I'd come to hate him even more than before, and I disliked all of his ideas, including this one, of course. Something will go wrong, I just know it.
'Ladies first' he grinned. He's up to something. 1) Because he was grinning widely and 2) because he said 'ladies', a word he wouldn't use near me if he wasn't up to something. I replied in the easiest way I could think of.
'What are you waiting for then?' I said. The grin on his face turned to an icy glare.
'I was hoping a lady'd show up, but seeing as that's not likely to happen because Miss Scarecrow is with me, I'll just go first' Call me Miss Scarecrow, he'll regret that...
'How selfless you are' I said, sarcasm dripping all over the place (causing a new river to form right there). He ignored me and gracefully leapt off his horse. So not fair! No matter how much of an asshole he is, his moves are so perfect... NOT FAIR!!!
He took off the shoes he wore, then he rolled up his leggings to his knees. He waded into the water, and his horse willingly followed with just a single word. Carefully he waded into the water and even more careful he waded to the other bank, his horse following close behind him. For a moment the thought of a possible escape flashed through my mind, then I dropped the idea.
I had no idea how to survive in the wild or how to reach the living world on my own. Besides, Elf-boy would turn around and shoot me before you could say "Fuck you, you fucking fuck!" I dismounted and did the same as Legolas had done a little earlier, tying my things securely to the saddle of my horse. You'd think that after all these days I'd know then name of my horse but nooooooooooo, Elf-boy hadn't told me. I doubt that he even knows the name himself.
I waded into the water. I immediately felt the strong current of the river, almost causing me to lose my balance for a moment. Moreover, the water was seriously could. As in: I want an ice cream because it's nice and warm!!! I shivered, then carefully took a step as not to slip on the rocks. As I took more steps my horse willingly followed me and before I knew it I was halfway the river. I looked at the bank where Legolas stood. He was watching me with a pondering expression on his face. For a moment we made eye contact, then I looked away and resumed wading.
When I came near to the other bank of the river the rocks on the bottom made place for mud. Slippery and slimy mud... ew... I let go the reins of my horse and let the stallion find the best way to the bank for me. Taking careful steps I followed him. When he reached the bank Legolas took the reins and led him out. As I took another step I felt the mud disappear from underneath my feet and I slipped, fell backwards into the water.
The water was so cold that I felt as if I would instantly freeze. The cold pierced through my clothes, through my skin... it chilled me to the bone in less than a second. Cold as it was it also helped me recover quickly from my fall and, coughing up water, I sat up straight, only to notice the smirk on Elf-boy's arrogant face.
'You did this, didn't you?' I said angrily as I stood up.
'I have no idea what you're talking about' he replied innocently. Yeah right. And cheese is made of strawberries.
'You did this with your Elven magic!' I accused him.
'What Elven magic?' he went on as I started wading the last bit to the riverbank.
'You know damn well what I'm talking about!' I shouted. Just like his people froze Thorin when he was captured. This is not even a fraction of that power.
'Well you have been nagging for days that you wanted to take a bath' he grinned. I so wanted to charge at him and kick his ass right there, but I knew that if it came to fighting I was no match for him. Frustrating fact. Where's a bow and arrow when you need them?
I walked to my horse and took my towel and spare clothes out of my bag. I started walking to the little grove I saw nearby to get changed.
'And where do you think you're going?' Legolas's voice came from behind me.
'To that grove over there' I replied without turning around.
'No you're not. You might not return'
'Oh come on! If I was plotting an escape I would've done that whilst you were busy crossing the river. Besides, you're making this journey to get rid of me anyway' I replied, now seriously pissed. I was cold and soaked, all I wanted was to put on some dry clothes. And then Elf-boy starts whining that I might just run away. Yeah sure, I'd really do that on foot when I'm wearing wet clothes. This once again proves that he must be a natural blonde. He fell silent after my words, probably realizing that he had absolutely no point.
'My prisoners don't escape, they never do, and I intend to keep it that way. You won't go unless by my will' he said after a while.
'How about the thirteen Dwarves? Or Bilbo Baggins? Or *Gollum*? Or was he just a guest?' I turned around, challenging look on my face. Legolas tried to glare me to death. He failed.
'I wasn't with the guards at that time. If I wa-'
'Yeah, yeah. bla bla...' I interrupted him.
'Get on your horse, now!' he hissed through gritted teeth, his hand dangerously close to one of the Elven knives he carried with him. I decided this might be the right time not to mock him any further and walked back to my horse. I put the spare clothes back in my pack and wrapped the towel around me, swearing to all the known deities in Middle-earth that I'd get back on him for all the injustice he made me go through.
~*~ Legolas's POV ~*~
Elena sneezed and suddenly started coughing as if her lungs were coming out. After a while the coughing stopped and she gasped for air, inhaled deeply a couple of times and then started breathing normally again. Five days since she fell in the river and she still had a fever. I seriously don't understand how mortals can get ill so easily. She started coughing again, even louder this time, and longer. Her face had turned deep red and for a moment I thought she would choke. My hopes dissolved into nothing shortly after when the coughing stopped. A cool breeze blew through the forest of Sarn Gebir and made the leaves of the trees rustle for a moment, then it died down. Elena shivered.
'Oh come on, you're not cold, are you?!' I exclaimed.
'Yes I am. And if you'd-' she sneezed. 'If you'd know what being ill is like you'd understand'
'But I don't know what it's like. Elves don't suffer from diseases'
'They just forgot to mention that it doesn't include mental illness, right Legolas?' I decided not to respond to this and ignored her, enjoying the silence for as long as it lasted.
But it was too silent. The wind had died down entirely, the rustling of the leaves had stopped and I couldn't hear a single bird singing in a range of miles. The only sound in this eerie silence was the soft thudding of our horses' hooves on the path. The silence was as a heavy cloak about me. Memories of evil things came back up. Something was drawing near.
'We have to leave this forest as soon as possible, we have to hurry!' I said to Elena, surprised how loud my voice sounded in the almost death-like silence. She started coughing again, but nodded and we sped on our horses. She felt it too. Only seconds after that, I could hear faint thudding in the distance. I looked back. A band of orcs, but still some miles behind us. Even as I watched I could see them gaining in on us. We sped on our horses even more.
Dodging low overhanging branches I looked back again, only to see that the orcs had come very close already. How could they be this fast? I shot the fastest orcs, but it didn't stop the other orcs as I had hoped. I turned my head back just in time to see several very low branches right in front of me. I managed to dodge them quite well, but couldn't help getting several scratches on my face.
I pushed Melda to the brink of exhaustion, we had to stay ahead of the orcs. Small flakes of foam flew from his mouth, Melda wouldn't be able to keep up this speed forever and was already getting exhausted. Elena shouted something at me, she was falling behind. I turned and shot back another arrow at the orcs. Suddenly Elena screamed again, in fear this time, and I turned back to see what was wrong. Out of the bushes next to the path ahead of us jumped another band of orcs.
Elena's horse pranced, threw her off and flew before the orcs. Before any of the orcs could move towards her I'd already shot five of them, and she'd managed to grab the dagger Aragorn had given her. The orcs shrieked and moved to attack just as I leaped off my horse and drew the knives I carried with me. Immediately I started fighting the orcs, slaying them as fast as I could. We were severely outnumbered and we'd lost one horse. I spun to see how Elena was faring but the only thing I saw was that the orcs behind us had caught up. I slashed at them, tried to prevent myself from being surrounded.
Luckily there weren't as many orcs as I had first seen in that flash of a second, and sooner than I expected I had slain all of my attackers. I sought for Elena. She wasn't in direct eyesight. I ran towards where I could hear sounds of battle. I may hate her, but I went through a whole lot of trouble, got this far on the road, I will not just have her killed by orcs. It would show me weak, unable to defend myself and a prisoner against a couple of miserable orcs. She will not leave, nor die, unless by my will and my will alone.
There was Elena, surrounded by six huge orcs and several orc corpses, stained red and black with orc blood and her own. She was panting heavily, and disarmed. Even as I ran to her aid and threw one of my knives straight in the throat of one of the orcs, the largest orc stabbed her in the side. She gasped and sank to the ground, clutching her side. Her eyes met mine, filled with fear of dying.
I let out an angry cry. Nobody has the right to kill my prisoner. Nobody but me. And nobody should die at the hands of an orc, not even Elena. I attacked the remaining orcs.
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E/N: Wieeeeeeeee!!! I have a new cellphone!!! With Ringwraiths cover!!! And three LotR ringtones!!! And a LotR screensaver on it too!!! And yes, my phone bill went skyrocketing ever since I got the new cellphone. So? I have a really cool cellphone =P. Why I'm telling this? Are you jealous yet? Good, there's your answer. Blabla yaddayaddayadda... reviews yaddayadda... constructive criticism welcome too... flames for Denethor... blabla... you guessed correctly, I'm utterly bored.
Love, peace and a paperclip
-xxx- Elvea
Post Scriptum: (sorry for annoying you with my Latin. I just wanted to show off that I know Latin for once =P) I put my Moria-school basement story up as a fic. Which means that you can see the convo's we had whilst discovering, and know more about our plans, if you're interested. You can also join our Fellowship, if you want. JOIN THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE CALCULATOR!!! Anyway, go read it! I'm gonna make a manga of the story too, and post it on the web. Blabbering too long already, so bye. For real this time. Or not.
Post Post Scriptum: SORRY FOR THE CLIFFIE!!! STORY DOES NOT END HERE!!! SORRY FOR THE SHORTNESS OF THIS CHAPTER!!!
Post Post Post Scriptum: DON'T KILL ME FOR LETTING LEGOLAS HAVE SOME VENGEANCE!!!
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Me: Thanks for the compliment/review. I hope you liked this chapter.
Isis: Well, here's the new chapter. Sorry for the delay. I hope you enjoyed this chapter too. And yes, commanding me to write does help. When readers command, I can only obey...
Lady Aurian: Here's your update! Hope you liked! But I don't think you knew of this part though. I re-wrote it.
lil' odd me: Patience is a virtue they say. I hope that, despite the delay. You still think this is good (enough). Working on High school, Elvea's POV as well. Prepare for a long chapter.
Belladonna Bloom: Don't waste your time reviewing every chapter I write. Just review when you feel like it. Glad you think it's funny.
Frodo-Lover: Well, here's the first chapter of the next couple. It's gonna get better again after this, I swear. Elena's mission of annoying Legolas to mental damage is far from over. Prepare for poetry, songs, PMS and more. Well, Moria is really in my school basement, so I'm gonna try to find the secret passageway to Middle-earth. Obviously my school and Middle-earth are parallel. Oh and yes, I still have Pippin Hobbit napped.
Yavanna: Brilliant! I love that word! They say Elijah uses it a lot! Can you guess I'm an Elijah/Frodo fan? Need to think of a way to get him in here somehow... hmmm... You're welcome btw, for thanking me writing this. You should also thank my kid sister though, for forcing me to write during class and every free hour I have. She hates LotR, and is thus addicted to this story, you see. I simply get bored of Legomances, so no problem writing this. Beware of the Diabolical Plot Bunnies of Doom (tm), they might just show up anywhere.
Black Pearl: Okay, that's cool! I created someone's hero! Feel so special now... *cough*Legolas's Big Ego Syndrome*cough* I promise next update will be sooner, seeing as my test week is now officially over. Thank the Valar for that. If you burn down my school and help me defeat the Evil Mathematics Teacher of Hell I might even be faster with an update... *hinthint*
Oasisrocker: Hey, me again! Hope I didn't keep you waiting too long. I'm so happy that people agree with me and what I said in the prologue. I feared I would only get flames for this. In stead I got lovely reviewers. Thanks for saying that my story's well written, nobody really said that yet. Makes me feel good (I needed that after a double hour of mathematics from Sauron). I promise things will get funnier again, and once again, don't die. I'm not writing stories to kill people. For stories like that you should read Endomiel's. She's the Goddess of Evil you see. TTFN!
Hoku Bloom Greenleaf: |:o) so happy you love it. I don't think Elena is you though, even if she looks like you in certain ways. I made her up (duh). Do you think the kicking was enough vengeance, or should she get more? I have had requests for that. Need more opinions, seeing as I have loads of ideas for the next chapters.
Sandman: *blushes* Thanks for the compliments, they were really sweet. Gosh, you said... unique. About your thoughts on Legolas stories... you are probably right. Most girls Mary Sue him. He's either a Mary Sue, or he marries one *belch*. The whole reason why I wrote this story. I'm glad the idea succeeded instead of getting me flamed to hell. (Flame my mathematics teacher! He BELONGS in hell!)
ola: Like I said before, I can't deny my readers anything. It's (one of my) weak point(s). Sorry it wasn't all that soon. They will get more frequent, I promise.
ElvenPickle: That came out really blunt, do you realize that? Still funny though, I haven't had a single reviewer yet who literally called him an asshole. Heard things in that direction though. I agree with you on the Mary Sue part. DEATH TO THE MARY SUE AND MARY SUE-LIKE LEGOLAS'S!!! I've had enough of those. They made Legolas' ego what it is like in my story. WAY too big. So now he must suffer... heheh... oh what the hell... MUHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Naseera: Don't worry, I caught the Diabolical PlotBunnies of Doom and safely locked them away. They won't bother me with dangerous plot twists and Deus-Ex-Machina's for the time being. May have to release them when I run out of ideas though (don't worry, that won't happen, I have the plot all figured, and loads of ideas). Getting sick of Legomances too. Opinion question: should Elena get more vengeance?
E/N: Yes, I'm back. Be afraid, be very afraid... heheh. Sorry I took this long. Endomiel's been distracting me a lot lately. Ever since we discovered Moria in our school, she wants me to help her find the exact location of Mirkwood, or Thranduil's palace to be more precise... so terribly tiring. Personally I'd much rather look for the Shire, huge blue eyes, a Ringbearer, and as a bonus a Scottish accent. So I'm a pervy hobbit fancier, so what?! We've already discovered a Hobbit running through the school, and I've been trying to catch him so that I can force him to tell me where the Shire is. As a result I did not have much time to write left. Also there are our dealings with the Diabolical Mathematics Teacher of Doom aka Sauron. We are making plans for a paint bomb. But first, a new chapter. Enjoy.
Love, peace and a paperclip,
-xxx- Elvea
Disclaimer: I do not own anything that New Line Cinema or Tolkien Enterprises already owns *sobs* and I am not gaining any other profit out of writing this than (positive) reviews and a good laugh when I think of a new cruel way to annoy Legolas. So there.
This chapter is dedicated to Orlando Bloom, because I feel sorry for him. Yes, sorry. Imagine finding a story on your character on the Web, and then finding out the author tortures him in terrible ways... well he probably hasn't read this, but if he has (which I greatly doubt) and is still (brave enough to be) reading the rest of the story: Mr. Bloom, my most sincere apologies for giving you a possible shock, mental damage and serious damage on your ego. I didn't mean to hurt you like this at all. It's supposed to hurt much, much more =P. Gee aren't I nice? o:)
"With that he (A/N: Legolas) sprang forth nimbly, and then Frodo noticed as if for the first time, though he had long known it, that the Elf had no boots, but wore only light shoes, as he always did, and his feet made little imprint in the snow." (the Fellowship of the Ring, by J.R.R. Tolkien, book 2 - chapter 3; The Ring Goes South)
"A smaller and lighter horse, but restive and fiery, was brought to Legolas. Arod was his name. But Legolas asked them to take off the saddle and rein. 'I need them not,' he said, and leaped lightly up, and to their wonder Arod was tame and willing beneath him, moving here and there with but a spoken word: such was the elvish way with all good beasts." (the Two Towers, by J.R.R. Tolkien, book 3 - chapter 2; The Riders of Rohan)
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Chapter 3 - Detour to Mirkwood
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~*~ Legolas's POV ~*~
Hate. What a lame word for a feeling that can grow so strong. I hate Elena, I seriously hate her. I thought that what I felt before couldn't grow any stronger, but after what she did yesterday I keep suppressing my urge to kill her. If it wasn't for the fact that Elves don't just go and kill people because they're a peaceful people, and I'm a bloody Elven prince, she'd be pretty much dead right now.
Also, I don't want to disappoint Aragorn and Arwen. Before we left Minas Tirith they had explicitly told me that they had good faith in me and trusted me not to kill the little bitch. They probably expected her, along the road, to do what she did, especially after what she'd done with the wine that night at dinner.
Oh sure, I wasn't making it very easy for her either, certainly not after yesterday, I know that. But she deserves it. And she's going to pay dearly for what she did, I'll make sure of it. She didn't get anything to eat since yesterday morning, which must mean she's probably been starving all day. The look on her face as she sat watching me make my dinner confirmed that.
I took a bite of my bread, pulling a face of ecstasy whilst eating it. She hungrily stared at the bread in my hand for a moment, then turned her gaze towards the small pool not far from where we sat. Suddenly she stood up and walked to the pool, without saying even a single word. She started washing her face with the water from the pool. I grinned. I didn't allow her to bathe anymore either. Okay, so I didn't allow her to do that anyway, it was a pretty good way to get back on her.
'I'm bored' she suddenly said, breaking the silence between us.
'Not my problem' I replied. As if I care about that.
'There's nothing to do around here' she went on. I sighed. When was she finally gonna stop nagging?
'Didn't you just cover that by stating that you're bored?'
'Shut up! What I was saying, before you *rudely* interrupted me, is that there's no adventure here...'
'What's that supposed to mean?'
'There's no action, nothing happens, there are no orcs, no giant spiders... there's no DANGER...' she said with some sort of dreamy, absentminded look in her eyes. This once again proves that she's completely insane.
'So? Would you want that then?'
'Duh. Right now this is practically the same as a trip to my grandparents' she stated.
'Fine' I said, suppressing my upcoming grin. 'We'll go through Mirkwood'
~*~ Elena's POV ~*~
'Behold' Legolas said, 'the great river Onodló'
'Do you really have to say it so melodramatic?' I asked, not bothering to hide my boredom. A river. Yay.
'This happens to be the river Entwash' he said whilst glaring at me, 'and we are going to cross it'
'Oh goody' I responded sarcastically. It had been seven days since the "incident", and in those seven days we'd hardly spoken to each other, and I have lived on a couple of slices of bread and a few liters of water in total. Legging-las is so generous...yeah right. I always thought that Wood- elves are nice to their prisoners? Tolkien's mistake, obviously... or Legolas is the exception that confirms the rule. Either way, basically it meant that I'd come to hate him even more than before, and I disliked all of his ideas, including this one, of course. Something will go wrong, I just know it.
'Ladies first' he grinned. He's up to something. 1) Because he was grinning widely and 2) because he said 'ladies', a word he wouldn't use near me if he wasn't up to something. I replied in the easiest way I could think of.
'What are you waiting for then?' I said. The grin on his face turned to an icy glare.
'I was hoping a lady'd show up, but seeing as that's not likely to happen because Miss Scarecrow is with me, I'll just go first' Call me Miss Scarecrow, he'll regret that...
'How selfless you are' I said, sarcasm dripping all over the place (causing a new river to form right there). He ignored me and gracefully leapt off his horse. So not fair! No matter how much of an asshole he is, his moves are so perfect... NOT FAIR!!!
He took off the shoes he wore, then he rolled up his leggings to his knees. He waded into the water, and his horse willingly followed with just a single word. Carefully he waded into the water and even more careful he waded to the other bank, his horse following close behind him. For a moment the thought of a possible escape flashed through my mind, then I dropped the idea.
I had no idea how to survive in the wild or how to reach the living world on my own. Besides, Elf-boy would turn around and shoot me before you could say "Fuck you, you fucking fuck!" I dismounted and did the same as Legolas had done a little earlier, tying my things securely to the saddle of my horse. You'd think that after all these days I'd know then name of my horse but nooooooooooo, Elf-boy hadn't told me. I doubt that he even knows the name himself.
I waded into the water. I immediately felt the strong current of the river, almost causing me to lose my balance for a moment. Moreover, the water was seriously could. As in: I want an ice cream because it's nice and warm!!! I shivered, then carefully took a step as not to slip on the rocks. As I took more steps my horse willingly followed me and before I knew it I was halfway the river. I looked at the bank where Legolas stood. He was watching me with a pondering expression on his face. For a moment we made eye contact, then I looked away and resumed wading.
When I came near to the other bank of the river the rocks on the bottom made place for mud. Slippery and slimy mud... ew... I let go the reins of my horse and let the stallion find the best way to the bank for me. Taking careful steps I followed him. When he reached the bank Legolas took the reins and led him out. As I took another step I felt the mud disappear from underneath my feet and I slipped, fell backwards into the water.
The water was so cold that I felt as if I would instantly freeze. The cold pierced through my clothes, through my skin... it chilled me to the bone in less than a second. Cold as it was it also helped me recover quickly from my fall and, coughing up water, I sat up straight, only to notice the smirk on Elf-boy's arrogant face.
'You did this, didn't you?' I said angrily as I stood up.
'I have no idea what you're talking about' he replied innocently. Yeah right. And cheese is made of strawberries.
'You did this with your Elven magic!' I accused him.
'What Elven magic?' he went on as I started wading the last bit to the riverbank.
'You know damn well what I'm talking about!' I shouted. Just like his people froze Thorin when he was captured. This is not even a fraction of that power.
'Well you have been nagging for days that you wanted to take a bath' he grinned. I so wanted to charge at him and kick his ass right there, but I knew that if it came to fighting I was no match for him. Frustrating fact. Where's a bow and arrow when you need them?
I walked to my horse and took my towel and spare clothes out of my bag. I started walking to the little grove I saw nearby to get changed.
'And where do you think you're going?' Legolas's voice came from behind me.
'To that grove over there' I replied without turning around.
'No you're not. You might not return'
'Oh come on! If I was plotting an escape I would've done that whilst you were busy crossing the river. Besides, you're making this journey to get rid of me anyway' I replied, now seriously pissed. I was cold and soaked, all I wanted was to put on some dry clothes. And then Elf-boy starts whining that I might just run away. Yeah sure, I'd really do that on foot when I'm wearing wet clothes. This once again proves that he must be a natural blonde. He fell silent after my words, probably realizing that he had absolutely no point.
'My prisoners don't escape, they never do, and I intend to keep it that way. You won't go unless by my will' he said after a while.
'How about the thirteen Dwarves? Or Bilbo Baggins? Or *Gollum*? Or was he just a guest?' I turned around, challenging look on my face. Legolas tried to glare me to death. He failed.
'I wasn't with the guards at that time. If I wa-'
'Yeah, yeah. bla bla...' I interrupted him.
'Get on your horse, now!' he hissed through gritted teeth, his hand dangerously close to one of the Elven knives he carried with him. I decided this might be the right time not to mock him any further and walked back to my horse. I put the spare clothes back in my pack and wrapped the towel around me, swearing to all the known deities in Middle-earth that I'd get back on him for all the injustice he made me go through.
~*~ Legolas's POV ~*~
Elena sneezed and suddenly started coughing as if her lungs were coming out. After a while the coughing stopped and she gasped for air, inhaled deeply a couple of times and then started breathing normally again. Five days since she fell in the river and she still had a fever. I seriously don't understand how mortals can get ill so easily. She started coughing again, even louder this time, and longer. Her face had turned deep red and for a moment I thought she would choke. My hopes dissolved into nothing shortly after when the coughing stopped. A cool breeze blew through the forest of Sarn Gebir and made the leaves of the trees rustle for a moment, then it died down. Elena shivered.
'Oh come on, you're not cold, are you?!' I exclaimed.
'Yes I am. And if you'd-' she sneezed. 'If you'd know what being ill is like you'd understand'
'But I don't know what it's like. Elves don't suffer from diseases'
'They just forgot to mention that it doesn't include mental illness, right Legolas?' I decided not to respond to this and ignored her, enjoying the silence for as long as it lasted.
But it was too silent. The wind had died down entirely, the rustling of the leaves had stopped and I couldn't hear a single bird singing in a range of miles. The only sound in this eerie silence was the soft thudding of our horses' hooves on the path. The silence was as a heavy cloak about me. Memories of evil things came back up. Something was drawing near.
'We have to leave this forest as soon as possible, we have to hurry!' I said to Elena, surprised how loud my voice sounded in the almost death-like silence. She started coughing again, but nodded and we sped on our horses. She felt it too. Only seconds after that, I could hear faint thudding in the distance. I looked back. A band of orcs, but still some miles behind us. Even as I watched I could see them gaining in on us. We sped on our horses even more.
Dodging low overhanging branches I looked back again, only to see that the orcs had come very close already. How could they be this fast? I shot the fastest orcs, but it didn't stop the other orcs as I had hoped. I turned my head back just in time to see several very low branches right in front of me. I managed to dodge them quite well, but couldn't help getting several scratches on my face.
I pushed Melda to the brink of exhaustion, we had to stay ahead of the orcs. Small flakes of foam flew from his mouth, Melda wouldn't be able to keep up this speed forever and was already getting exhausted. Elena shouted something at me, she was falling behind. I turned and shot back another arrow at the orcs. Suddenly Elena screamed again, in fear this time, and I turned back to see what was wrong. Out of the bushes next to the path ahead of us jumped another band of orcs.
Elena's horse pranced, threw her off and flew before the orcs. Before any of the orcs could move towards her I'd already shot five of them, and she'd managed to grab the dagger Aragorn had given her. The orcs shrieked and moved to attack just as I leaped off my horse and drew the knives I carried with me. Immediately I started fighting the orcs, slaying them as fast as I could. We were severely outnumbered and we'd lost one horse. I spun to see how Elena was faring but the only thing I saw was that the orcs behind us had caught up. I slashed at them, tried to prevent myself from being surrounded.
Luckily there weren't as many orcs as I had first seen in that flash of a second, and sooner than I expected I had slain all of my attackers. I sought for Elena. She wasn't in direct eyesight. I ran towards where I could hear sounds of battle. I may hate her, but I went through a whole lot of trouble, got this far on the road, I will not just have her killed by orcs. It would show me weak, unable to defend myself and a prisoner against a couple of miserable orcs. She will not leave, nor die, unless by my will and my will alone.
There was Elena, surrounded by six huge orcs and several orc corpses, stained red and black with orc blood and her own. She was panting heavily, and disarmed. Even as I ran to her aid and threw one of my knives straight in the throat of one of the orcs, the largest orc stabbed her in the side. She gasped and sank to the ground, clutching her side. Her eyes met mine, filled with fear of dying.
I let out an angry cry. Nobody has the right to kill my prisoner. Nobody but me. And nobody should die at the hands of an orc, not even Elena. I attacked the remaining orcs.
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E/N: Wieeeeeeeee!!! I have a new cellphone!!! With Ringwraiths cover!!! And three LotR ringtones!!! And a LotR screensaver on it too!!! And yes, my phone bill went skyrocketing ever since I got the new cellphone. So? I have a really cool cellphone =P. Why I'm telling this? Are you jealous yet? Good, there's your answer. Blabla yaddayaddayadda... reviews yaddayadda... constructive criticism welcome too... flames for Denethor... blabla... you guessed correctly, I'm utterly bored.
Love, peace and a paperclip
-xxx- Elvea
Post Scriptum: (sorry for annoying you with my Latin. I just wanted to show off that I know Latin for once =P) I put my Moria-school basement story up as a fic. Which means that you can see the convo's we had whilst discovering, and know more about our plans, if you're interested. You can also join our Fellowship, if you want. JOIN THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE CALCULATOR!!! Anyway, go read it! I'm gonna make a manga of the story too, and post it on the web. Blabbering too long already, so bye. For real this time. Or not.
Post Post Scriptum: SORRY FOR THE CLIFFIE!!! STORY DOES NOT END HERE!!! SORRY FOR THE SHORTNESS OF THIS CHAPTER!!!
Post Post Post Scriptum: DON'T KILL ME FOR LETTING LEGOLAS HAVE SOME VENGEANCE!!!
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Me: Thanks for the compliment/review. I hope you liked this chapter.
Isis: Well, here's the new chapter. Sorry for the delay. I hope you enjoyed this chapter too. And yes, commanding me to write does help. When readers command, I can only obey...
Lady Aurian: Here's your update! Hope you liked! But I don't think you knew of this part though. I re-wrote it.
lil' odd me: Patience is a virtue they say. I hope that, despite the delay. You still think this is good (enough). Working on High school, Elvea's POV as well. Prepare for a long chapter.
Belladonna Bloom: Don't waste your time reviewing every chapter I write. Just review when you feel like it. Glad you think it's funny.
Frodo-Lover: Well, here's the first chapter of the next couple. It's gonna get better again after this, I swear. Elena's mission of annoying Legolas to mental damage is far from over. Prepare for poetry, songs, PMS and more. Well, Moria is really in my school basement, so I'm gonna try to find the secret passageway to Middle-earth. Obviously my school and Middle-earth are parallel. Oh and yes, I still have Pippin Hobbit napped.
Yavanna: Brilliant! I love that word! They say Elijah uses it a lot! Can you guess I'm an Elijah/Frodo fan? Need to think of a way to get him in here somehow... hmmm... You're welcome btw, for thanking me writing this. You should also thank my kid sister though, for forcing me to write during class and every free hour I have. She hates LotR, and is thus addicted to this story, you see. I simply get bored of Legomances, so no problem writing this. Beware of the Diabolical Plot Bunnies of Doom (tm), they might just show up anywhere.
Black Pearl: Okay, that's cool! I created someone's hero! Feel so special now... *cough*Legolas's Big Ego Syndrome*cough* I promise next update will be sooner, seeing as my test week is now officially over. Thank the Valar for that. If you burn down my school and help me defeat the Evil Mathematics Teacher of Hell I might even be faster with an update... *hinthint*
Oasisrocker: Hey, me again! Hope I didn't keep you waiting too long. I'm so happy that people agree with me and what I said in the prologue. I feared I would only get flames for this. In stead I got lovely reviewers. Thanks for saying that my story's well written, nobody really said that yet. Makes me feel good (I needed that after a double hour of mathematics from Sauron). I promise things will get funnier again, and once again, don't die. I'm not writing stories to kill people. For stories like that you should read Endomiel's. She's the Goddess of Evil you see. TTFN!
Hoku Bloom Greenleaf: |:o) so happy you love it. I don't think Elena is you though, even if she looks like you in certain ways. I made her up (duh). Do you think the kicking was enough vengeance, or should she get more? I have had requests for that. Need more opinions, seeing as I have loads of ideas for the next chapters.
Sandman: *blushes* Thanks for the compliments, they were really sweet. Gosh, you said... unique. About your thoughts on Legolas stories... you are probably right. Most girls Mary Sue him. He's either a Mary Sue, or he marries one *belch*. The whole reason why I wrote this story. I'm glad the idea succeeded instead of getting me flamed to hell. (Flame my mathematics teacher! He BELONGS in hell!)
ola: Like I said before, I can't deny my readers anything. It's (one of my) weak point(s). Sorry it wasn't all that soon. They will get more frequent, I promise.
ElvenPickle: That came out really blunt, do you realize that? Still funny though, I haven't had a single reviewer yet who literally called him an asshole. Heard things in that direction though. I agree with you on the Mary Sue part. DEATH TO THE MARY SUE AND MARY SUE-LIKE LEGOLAS'S!!! I've had enough of those. They made Legolas' ego what it is like in my story. WAY too big. So now he must suffer... heheh... oh what the hell... MUHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Naseera: Don't worry, I caught the Diabolical PlotBunnies of Doom and safely locked them away. They won't bother me with dangerous plot twists and Deus-Ex-Machina's for the time being. May have to release them when I run out of ideas though (don't worry, that won't happen, I have the plot all figured, and loads of ideas). Getting sick of Legomances too. Opinion question: should Elena get more vengeance?