Disclaimer: The same as always.
Chapter 21- The Nightmare Continues
Early the next morning, a knocking was heard upon the door to the headmaster's office, much to the surprise of Albus Dumbledore, who had come to his office earlier than usual in the hopes of getting a head start on his day. He glanced out the window to find the sun barely breaking over the horizon, the soft pink hues sending the darkness of night retreating from the cloud-mottled sky. He was astonished that someone with business to see the headmaster would arrive so soon after dawn.
Fawkes seemed disconcerted as well, stirring upon his post, crying reproachfully, and then settling down once more, his head under his reddish gold wing.
"Come in," Dumbledore intoned concernedly, his blue eyes looking down his long, crooked nose towards the door, as he lowered himself into his seat behind the desk.
Severus Snape strode unsteadily into the room, his hair and robes dishevelled, and stumbled to the chair across from the older man, his hands grasping the back to hold himself upright. "Headmaster, excuse my interruption," the professor slurred slightly as he drew his dark robes about himself, his shadowy eyes gazing madly towards the old man before him, "but I really needed to speak to you."
Dumbledore was shocked at the bedraggled appearance and apparent drunkenness of one of his head teachers, and had risen from his chair as Snape entered the office, quickly moving to guide him to sit in the one before his desk. "Severus, what happened?" With a dart of blue eyes, a kettle poured a cup of dark black liquid which slid over the headmaster's desk, pausing in front of the potions master.
"My worst nightmare," Snape replied, grimacing as the headmaster picked up the coffee cup and placed it in the professor's hands as if he wasn't capable of doing it himself. With a frown towards the old man, he raised the cup to his lips, sipping carefully, and then taking several long swallows, allowing the richness of its scent to permeate the hazy-headedness of his alcoholic stupor.
He closed his eyes, lowering the cup as he leaned forward, resting his forearms on his lap, his fingertips turning it slowly, watching his unmoving reflection upon its dark surface. "Julius knows."
The headmaster raised a bushy white eyebrow as he absorbed this news, settling himself in the chair beside his potions professor. "Ah, and I suppose it was not warmly received when it was told to him?" the older man replied, sitting back in his chair, watching the younger man before him carefully. "How did he find out?"
Snape laughed bitterly, lifting the coffee to his lips, sipping once more before he answered. "Draco Malfoy, the last student on earth I would have wanted to know." Setting the cup upon the desk, he combed his fingers through his hair and wiped his eyes tiredly. "And that is not the worst of it. Draco sent the news to his father two -- no, three days ago now."
Dumbledore listened quietly, sympathetically to the teacher, feeling at least partly to blame, himself. He was, after all, the man who had asked the potions master to spy on the Dark Lord in the first place. He was the cause of Voldemort's distrust of Serverus's loyalty.
"The Dark Lord will find out about the ruse through Lucius Malfoy," Snape began sadly, shaking his head, and turned his swarthy gaze to the wizard before him. "How am I to protect my son, Albus?"
The headmaster sighed heavily, and crossed his arms before him, frowning as he closed his eyes, thinking quietly to himself. He pitied the man sitting near him, remembering how many nights Severus spent within this very office, as besotted as he was now, grieving for the loss of his family. The old man knew he had failed both families that night, the Potters and the Snapes, and rarely did a day go by that he wished he could have done things differently.
"What did you tell Julius?" Dumbledore asked, changing the subject for the time being, unable to come up with an answer to assuage the professor's fears.
"Everything. Everything. What else could I do?" the dark-eyed man muttered, allowing his head to fall forward, the greasy black strands of his hair hanging before his face. "I can't lose him, Headmaster, not after allowing him back into my heart once more. It has been so long since I was proud of someone, since I… cared."
"Julius is safe as long as he is at Hogwarts, Severus," the old wizard returned, "Voldemort would not dare enter these grounds. It is you that I am concerned about. Have you had any warning?"
Snape shook his head, his right hand unconsciously rubbing his left forearm. "No. But that does nothing to calm my anxiety. Personally, I don't care what happens to me, as long as the boy is alright. But he cannot stay here forever, there will come a time when he must leave these protected walls."
Dumbledore poured the potions master another cup of coffee, and they sat in silence for a time before he questioned, "Have you told Julius about your fears?"
"He knows that the Dark Lord believes him to be dead, but he does not know about Lucius," Snape sighed, leaning back into his chair, his nebulous eyes dull and hopeless.
"You owe it to him to tell him, Severus," Dumbledore said quietly, gazing towards the ragged man beside him. "He is old enough to know what dangers may lie ahead. You cannot protect him forever."
"That has become more than apparent, of course," Snape snapped bitterly, wishing he could lock his son in some remote place, away from every danger the world possessed. Rising a bit more steadily from his chair, strode purposefully towards the door, and paused just before grasping the knob. Turning slightly to glance at the wizened old man, he said gratefully, "Thank you, Headmaster."
The next morning, Julius met Hermione outside the Great Hall after breakfast to walk to Potions together. He hadn't bothered to join either his friends or housemates at the tables, choosing to skip the meal, his stomach still quite unsettled from all that transpired the night before. But as he approached her from the corridor, something in the way she smiled at him eased his fears slightly, and a smile of his own drifted onto his lips. She always had that effect on him. His dark eyes catching the firelight as he neared, he reached for her hand, holding it lightly within his own as they turned to make their way to class.
"I'm sorry about last night, Hermione," he apologised as they walked down the hall towards the stairs. "I just had a really rough day."
"I heard," she smiled.
Julius suddenly stopped, nearly causing Hermione to stumble, and turned to face her, a shocked expression upon his face. "You did?"
"Well, yeah… it's all over the school," she chuckled softly, her brown eyes shining in the torchlight, quirking a brow as she noted his wide-eyed countenance. "Why do you look so horrified? I mean, I know he can be hard on people, and he can really get on your nerves sometimes, but lets face it, he is great at motivating others and only wants them to do their best."
Julius just stared at the girl beside him like a deer caught in headlights. If handing out detentions like candy is her idea of motivation…
"I mean, if it wasn't for him," Hermione continued in his appalled silence, "you guys wouldn't be so close to capturing the Quidditch Cup, would you?"
Quidditch Cup? What does my father have to do with the Quidditch Cup? "Huh?" Julius asked, thoroughly confused now. "What are you talking about?"
"Bradley," Hermione replied, looking at him as if he had two heads. "Your Quidditch Captain? He has been driving the entire team nuts from what I have heard."
"Oh," Julius returned, blinking as comprehension finally dawned.
"Who did you think I was talking about?" Hermione inquired curiously as they began to move once more, stepping lightly down the stairwell.
"Oh… um… I don't know." Julius responded hesitantly, "Bradley has been working us so hard I can't keep my mind straight."
They were the last students to enter the potions classroom just as the bell rang. Professor Snape was already standing behind his desk, and gave them both a sinister leer as they set up their cauldrons. "Running late, Miss Granger, Mr. DeVere? Might I suggest you save your lustful, pubescent trysts for the evening hours so as not to interfere with your timely arrival for your requisite studies. Obviously students your age feel that such tedious tasks like attending potions classes are less important than satisfying your hormonal urges, but I can assure you to the contrary."
Julius glanced up quickly, giving his father an apologetic look as he hastily turned to the proper page in his potions book, but he merely received one of the professor's trademark scowls in return.
The rest of the class seemed to go fairly well, though Julius seemed much more nervous when the professor passed by their table, and nearly placed the gillyweed into the potion too early. Luckily, Hermione caught his hand before he did, but let it go quickly as she noted the quick dart of shadowy eyes and frown from Snape.
Malfoy was unusually quiet as well, seeming to sink lowly into his chair each time Snape walked by, as if he wanted to be as unobtrusive as possible. Had Snape confronted Malfoy after their talk last night? If he had, it obviously had not gone well for Draco. Julius couldn't help but smile to himself as he thought of his father's reaction. His eyes followed the potions professor as often as he could afford, but the tall man gave no outward sign that he was the least bit interested in his son's progress or presence.
As they bottled their potion for testing at the end of class and packed up, he noted that Draco cleaned up as quickly as he was able, and was the first one out the door as the bell rang. Julius chuckled to himself as he packed his book into his bag, and was about to escort Hermione to her next class when a deep baritone voice called from the vicinity of the professor's desk.
"Mr. DeVere, if you would stay a moment, there are some things we need to discuss," Snape called from behind his desk. "In my office, if you please."
Julius gave Hermione a remorseful look and shrug, watching her nod in understanding and sympathy before making her way out into the hall. Glancing up at the tall black-clad professor, looking for some clue as to what this discussion was to be about (and finding not a single give-away sign), he strode into the adjacent office, pausing before the teacher's desk. My father's desk, he reminded himself, still coming to grips with everything.
Snape entered a moment later, trailed by the hem of his voluminous black robes, but did not move to sit in his chair behind his desk, taking one instead before it, and gesturing for Julius to take its twin. The older man breathed deeply, and was silent, pausing as if he could not find the right words to begin. He reminded himself that this was obviously going to be hard on the both of them until… if they finally accepted their relationship for what it was, and if more deeply-held feelings grew.
"I know what you were told last night must have been difficult to hear," Snape began deliberately. "There are so many things that we do not know about each other, that we may not like about each other, that we may even hate."
Julius sat quietly, listening intently to the man before him, watching the way his father played with his fingers while he talked, as if the older man felt just as nervous as he did about this whole situation. And why shouldn't he? Had the professor known that his son was about to show up in his life again so suddenly? A part of him felt sorry for the potions master who was clearly not accustomed to showing his emotions, forced into doing so by a chain of unexpected circumstances.
"Is there anything you want to ask me? Anything at all?" his father asked quietly, shady eyes lifting to gaze up towards the boy before him.
Julius thought a moment to himself. There was so much he already had to digest and he didn't know if he could handle anything more at the moment. "I think, in time, there will be many questions, sir," he began hesitantly, "but right now…my head is still spinning from last night."
Snape nodded quietly, glancing back down to his long fingers. He did not dismiss the boy, clearly wanting to communicate something else, but to Julius, seemed unable to do so.
"Is there anything you want to ask me?" Julius offered, not really wanting the conversation to end so quickly.
Severus's lips turned upwards slightly at the corners as his eyes lifted once more. "Yes," he said quietly. "Where did you learn that Quidditch feint that I saw you use in your last game against Miss Weasley?"
Julius couldn't help but smile, some of the nervousness suddenly erased as the conversation moved onto a subject that he could manage. They talked for at least an hour on the subject, and Julius found that his father was quite knowledgeable about the game, though he had never played himself.
After such a light-hearted discussion, Snape was quite sorry to have it end, but unfortunately, there were more pressing matters at hand. "There is something else, actually, that needs to be spoken of, Julius," the potions master revealed. "The true reason for me asking you to stay after class."
Julius raised a dark brow at his father's suddenly anxious demeanor, and nodded quietly, listening.
Unable to put it off any longer, the older man sighed, staring at the tile floor once more. "You told me last night that Draco Malfoy was the one who told you that I was your father."
"Yes, sir," Julius whispered.
"I have known Mr. Malfoy's family for a number of years, since before you were born, in fact," Snape continued, his voice soft and velvety as he spoke, the harsh edge that he infused it with in front of his students gone. "Draco's father was -- is -- in the service of the Dark Lord. He is a Death Eater, like I myself once was, and as far as they think, still am."
Julius stared at his father, and it took him several moments to realise he wasn't breathing. When he finally did take a breath, it was a ragged and shaking intake of air. "If Malfoy tells--"
Severus glanced up at his son, his dark eyes filled with pain (and fear?). "Draco sent an owl to his father three days ago with the news. Lucius will know probably within this week, and then…" the old man shook his head slowly, taking a deep shuddering breath, his head falling between his hands.
A/N: Hope you enjoyed.
Chapter 21- The Nightmare Continues
Early the next morning, a knocking was heard upon the door to the headmaster's office, much to the surprise of Albus Dumbledore, who had come to his office earlier than usual in the hopes of getting a head start on his day. He glanced out the window to find the sun barely breaking over the horizon, the soft pink hues sending the darkness of night retreating from the cloud-mottled sky. He was astonished that someone with business to see the headmaster would arrive so soon after dawn.
Fawkes seemed disconcerted as well, stirring upon his post, crying reproachfully, and then settling down once more, his head under his reddish gold wing.
"Come in," Dumbledore intoned concernedly, his blue eyes looking down his long, crooked nose towards the door, as he lowered himself into his seat behind the desk.
Severus Snape strode unsteadily into the room, his hair and robes dishevelled, and stumbled to the chair across from the older man, his hands grasping the back to hold himself upright. "Headmaster, excuse my interruption," the professor slurred slightly as he drew his dark robes about himself, his shadowy eyes gazing madly towards the old man before him, "but I really needed to speak to you."
Dumbledore was shocked at the bedraggled appearance and apparent drunkenness of one of his head teachers, and had risen from his chair as Snape entered the office, quickly moving to guide him to sit in the one before his desk. "Severus, what happened?" With a dart of blue eyes, a kettle poured a cup of dark black liquid which slid over the headmaster's desk, pausing in front of the potions master.
"My worst nightmare," Snape replied, grimacing as the headmaster picked up the coffee cup and placed it in the professor's hands as if he wasn't capable of doing it himself. With a frown towards the old man, he raised the cup to his lips, sipping carefully, and then taking several long swallows, allowing the richness of its scent to permeate the hazy-headedness of his alcoholic stupor.
He closed his eyes, lowering the cup as he leaned forward, resting his forearms on his lap, his fingertips turning it slowly, watching his unmoving reflection upon its dark surface. "Julius knows."
The headmaster raised a bushy white eyebrow as he absorbed this news, settling himself in the chair beside his potions professor. "Ah, and I suppose it was not warmly received when it was told to him?" the older man replied, sitting back in his chair, watching the younger man before him carefully. "How did he find out?"
Snape laughed bitterly, lifting the coffee to his lips, sipping once more before he answered. "Draco Malfoy, the last student on earth I would have wanted to know." Setting the cup upon the desk, he combed his fingers through his hair and wiped his eyes tiredly. "And that is not the worst of it. Draco sent the news to his father two -- no, three days ago now."
Dumbledore listened quietly, sympathetically to the teacher, feeling at least partly to blame, himself. He was, after all, the man who had asked the potions master to spy on the Dark Lord in the first place. He was the cause of Voldemort's distrust of Serverus's loyalty.
"The Dark Lord will find out about the ruse through Lucius Malfoy," Snape began sadly, shaking his head, and turned his swarthy gaze to the wizard before him. "How am I to protect my son, Albus?"
The headmaster sighed heavily, and crossed his arms before him, frowning as he closed his eyes, thinking quietly to himself. He pitied the man sitting near him, remembering how many nights Severus spent within this very office, as besotted as he was now, grieving for the loss of his family. The old man knew he had failed both families that night, the Potters and the Snapes, and rarely did a day go by that he wished he could have done things differently.
"What did you tell Julius?" Dumbledore asked, changing the subject for the time being, unable to come up with an answer to assuage the professor's fears.
"Everything. Everything. What else could I do?" the dark-eyed man muttered, allowing his head to fall forward, the greasy black strands of his hair hanging before his face. "I can't lose him, Headmaster, not after allowing him back into my heart once more. It has been so long since I was proud of someone, since I… cared."
"Julius is safe as long as he is at Hogwarts, Severus," the old wizard returned, "Voldemort would not dare enter these grounds. It is you that I am concerned about. Have you had any warning?"
Snape shook his head, his right hand unconsciously rubbing his left forearm. "No. But that does nothing to calm my anxiety. Personally, I don't care what happens to me, as long as the boy is alright. But he cannot stay here forever, there will come a time when he must leave these protected walls."
Dumbledore poured the potions master another cup of coffee, and they sat in silence for a time before he questioned, "Have you told Julius about your fears?"
"He knows that the Dark Lord believes him to be dead, but he does not know about Lucius," Snape sighed, leaning back into his chair, his nebulous eyes dull and hopeless.
"You owe it to him to tell him, Severus," Dumbledore said quietly, gazing towards the ragged man beside him. "He is old enough to know what dangers may lie ahead. You cannot protect him forever."
"That has become more than apparent, of course," Snape snapped bitterly, wishing he could lock his son in some remote place, away from every danger the world possessed. Rising a bit more steadily from his chair, strode purposefully towards the door, and paused just before grasping the knob. Turning slightly to glance at the wizened old man, he said gratefully, "Thank you, Headmaster."
The next morning, Julius met Hermione outside the Great Hall after breakfast to walk to Potions together. He hadn't bothered to join either his friends or housemates at the tables, choosing to skip the meal, his stomach still quite unsettled from all that transpired the night before. But as he approached her from the corridor, something in the way she smiled at him eased his fears slightly, and a smile of his own drifted onto his lips. She always had that effect on him. His dark eyes catching the firelight as he neared, he reached for her hand, holding it lightly within his own as they turned to make their way to class.
"I'm sorry about last night, Hermione," he apologised as they walked down the hall towards the stairs. "I just had a really rough day."
"I heard," she smiled.
Julius suddenly stopped, nearly causing Hermione to stumble, and turned to face her, a shocked expression upon his face. "You did?"
"Well, yeah… it's all over the school," she chuckled softly, her brown eyes shining in the torchlight, quirking a brow as she noted his wide-eyed countenance. "Why do you look so horrified? I mean, I know he can be hard on people, and he can really get on your nerves sometimes, but lets face it, he is great at motivating others and only wants them to do their best."
Julius just stared at the girl beside him like a deer caught in headlights. If handing out detentions like candy is her idea of motivation…
"I mean, if it wasn't for him," Hermione continued in his appalled silence, "you guys wouldn't be so close to capturing the Quidditch Cup, would you?"
Quidditch Cup? What does my father have to do with the Quidditch Cup? "Huh?" Julius asked, thoroughly confused now. "What are you talking about?"
"Bradley," Hermione replied, looking at him as if he had two heads. "Your Quidditch Captain? He has been driving the entire team nuts from what I have heard."
"Oh," Julius returned, blinking as comprehension finally dawned.
"Who did you think I was talking about?" Hermione inquired curiously as they began to move once more, stepping lightly down the stairwell.
"Oh… um… I don't know." Julius responded hesitantly, "Bradley has been working us so hard I can't keep my mind straight."
They were the last students to enter the potions classroom just as the bell rang. Professor Snape was already standing behind his desk, and gave them both a sinister leer as they set up their cauldrons. "Running late, Miss Granger, Mr. DeVere? Might I suggest you save your lustful, pubescent trysts for the evening hours so as not to interfere with your timely arrival for your requisite studies. Obviously students your age feel that such tedious tasks like attending potions classes are less important than satisfying your hormonal urges, but I can assure you to the contrary."
Julius glanced up quickly, giving his father an apologetic look as he hastily turned to the proper page in his potions book, but he merely received one of the professor's trademark scowls in return.
The rest of the class seemed to go fairly well, though Julius seemed much more nervous when the professor passed by their table, and nearly placed the gillyweed into the potion too early. Luckily, Hermione caught his hand before he did, but let it go quickly as she noted the quick dart of shadowy eyes and frown from Snape.
Malfoy was unusually quiet as well, seeming to sink lowly into his chair each time Snape walked by, as if he wanted to be as unobtrusive as possible. Had Snape confronted Malfoy after their talk last night? If he had, it obviously had not gone well for Draco. Julius couldn't help but smile to himself as he thought of his father's reaction. His eyes followed the potions professor as often as he could afford, but the tall man gave no outward sign that he was the least bit interested in his son's progress or presence.
As they bottled their potion for testing at the end of class and packed up, he noted that Draco cleaned up as quickly as he was able, and was the first one out the door as the bell rang. Julius chuckled to himself as he packed his book into his bag, and was about to escort Hermione to her next class when a deep baritone voice called from the vicinity of the professor's desk.
"Mr. DeVere, if you would stay a moment, there are some things we need to discuss," Snape called from behind his desk. "In my office, if you please."
Julius gave Hermione a remorseful look and shrug, watching her nod in understanding and sympathy before making her way out into the hall. Glancing up at the tall black-clad professor, looking for some clue as to what this discussion was to be about (and finding not a single give-away sign), he strode into the adjacent office, pausing before the teacher's desk. My father's desk, he reminded himself, still coming to grips with everything.
Snape entered a moment later, trailed by the hem of his voluminous black robes, but did not move to sit in his chair behind his desk, taking one instead before it, and gesturing for Julius to take its twin. The older man breathed deeply, and was silent, pausing as if he could not find the right words to begin. He reminded himself that this was obviously going to be hard on the both of them until… if they finally accepted their relationship for what it was, and if more deeply-held feelings grew.
"I know what you were told last night must have been difficult to hear," Snape began deliberately. "There are so many things that we do not know about each other, that we may not like about each other, that we may even hate."
Julius sat quietly, listening intently to the man before him, watching the way his father played with his fingers while he talked, as if the older man felt just as nervous as he did about this whole situation. And why shouldn't he? Had the professor known that his son was about to show up in his life again so suddenly? A part of him felt sorry for the potions master who was clearly not accustomed to showing his emotions, forced into doing so by a chain of unexpected circumstances.
"Is there anything you want to ask me? Anything at all?" his father asked quietly, shady eyes lifting to gaze up towards the boy before him.
Julius thought a moment to himself. There was so much he already had to digest and he didn't know if he could handle anything more at the moment. "I think, in time, there will be many questions, sir," he began hesitantly, "but right now…my head is still spinning from last night."
Snape nodded quietly, glancing back down to his long fingers. He did not dismiss the boy, clearly wanting to communicate something else, but to Julius, seemed unable to do so.
"Is there anything you want to ask me?" Julius offered, not really wanting the conversation to end so quickly.
Severus's lips turned upwards slightly at the corners as his eyes lifted once more. "Yes," he said quietly. "Where did you learn that Quidditch feint that I saw you use in your last game against Miss Weasley?"
Julius couldn't help but smile, some of the nervousness suddenly erased as the conversation moved onto a subject that he could manage. They talked for at least an hour on the subject, and Julius found that his father was quite knowledgeable about the game, though he had never played himself.
After such a light-hearted discussion, Snape was quite sorry to have it end, but unfortunately, there were more pressing matters at hand. "There is something else, actually, that needs to be spoken of, Julius," the potions master revealed. "The true reason for me asking you to stay after class."
Julius raised a dark brow at his father's suddenly anxious demeanor, and nodded quietly, listening.
Unable to put it off any longer, the older man sighed, staring at the tile floor once more. "You told me last night that Draco Malfoy was the one who told you that I was your father."
"Yes, sir," Julius whispered.
"I have known Mr. Malfoy's family for a number of years, since before you were born, in fact," Snape continued, his voice soft and velvety as he spoke, the harsh edge that he infused it with in front of his students gone. "Draco's father was -- is -- in the service of the Dark Lord. He is a Death Eater, like I myself once was, and as far as they think, still am."
Julius stared at his father, and it took him several moments to realise he wasn't breathing. When he finally did take a breath, it was a ragged and shaking intake of air. "If Malfoy tells--"
Severus glanced up at his son, his dark eyes filled with pain (and fear?). "Draco sent an owl to his father three days ago with the news. Lucius will know probably within this week, and then…" the old man shook his head slowly, taking a deep shuddering breath, his head falling between his hands.
A/N: Hope you enjoyed.