"Asuka-chan."
It was amazing just how accustomed the nurse had become to calling her Asuka, almost as if it was a pet name.
Obligingly Asuka swung her legs over the side of the bed and shivered as her toes made contact with the cold floor. She was still barefoot and the chilliness traveled from her feet up throughout her body. The redhead folded her arms around herself. Why was it so cold in this damn place?
As usual, the nurse offered her arm and Asuka took it. In these few days she had learned much. She had learned that her nurse's name was Hazuki-san, was thirty-two, and had spent five of those years in this hospital. She had learned that this was one of the best hospitals in Japan, where many of the specialists worked. She had learned that there was a restroom to the left of her room and a small cafeteria down the hallway.
But Asuka had discovered nothing about herself, and that frustrated her immensely.
She thought back to the image on the ID card. A winking younger girl holding up two fingers in a "V" symbol, a wide smile on her face.
Her name is Sorhyu Asuka Langley.
My name is Sorhyu Asuka Langley.
But are we the same person?
In recent days, Hazuki-san had brushed out her long hair and tied it back with a thick pink ribbon. She'd futilely tried for the look in the teenage photo and finally settled on a simple ponytail, with the copper cascade fastened low on the back of Asuka's neck.
In addition, she'd brought Asuka a clean hospital gown daily but didn't insist on throwing away the rags the redhead had worn when she showed up at the hospital—how she had done so was still a mystery. Surprisingly Asuka didn't mind; the new gown was large, spacey, and smelled clean and fresh. It was a nice change from the soiled blue-green dress she had been wearing. Hazuki-san had even taken it home and washed it and mended all the rips. Asuka was quite grateful to her for that, if she could feel gratitude in her state of confusion.
How old am I?
Another question had crept into her mind. Hazuki-san had told her that she appeared about twenty-five or twenty-six, although no medical records on any Sorhyu Asuka Langleys could be found.
"You look very nice." Hazuki-san smiled, obviously proud of the young lady on her arm. "Ready to turn back now?"
Asuka shook her head.
She wanted to explore. She wanted to let go of Hazuki-san's hand and walk on her own to the open window nearby from which sunlight streamed in. Asuka could hear the sound of the cars and birds outside.
She loosened her grip on her nurse's arm and took her first wobbling steps alone, feeling foolish and frustrated.
If I can't remember how to do something as easy as walking, how will I find out who I am?
Asuka stumbled and tripped to the floor. Hazuki-san ran to her side, a sturdy arm ready, but Asuka ignored her and climbed back to her feet. The nurse backed away after seeing the determined look on her patient's face and remained a good distance away.
It took her nearly ten minutes to cover the twenty feet ahead of her, but when Asuka got there she placed both hands on the windowsill and threw her head back, feeling her hair tickle her face as it was blown backwards. She didn't mind this kind of cold. Unknown to the redhead, Hazuki-san strategically placed herself off at an angle, so that she wouldn't be interfering, but would be close enough to help should anything occur.
Asuka breathed in the fresh sweet-smelling air, and wished that she would never have to return to that stuffy room she lived in, where everything smelled of antiseptics and various medical chemicals.
She was still pretending to be mute. As much as she appreciated the efforts of her nurse, the well-meaning woman had begun practically bombarding her with questions. Since she couldn't reply vocally, Hazuki-san had brought her a pretty notebook with pale green pages bordered with pink cherry blossoms. Asuka had simply laid the book aside and turned her head away.
I'm not willing to tell Hazuki-san what I know, although I've already begun to remember.
She remembered a little bit about the kitchen. Certainly Misato had been there many times, along with a penguin. Or had her mind simply invented that detail? Asuka shook her head to clear it. A penguin in a kitchen... surely she was going mad. There was a table in the middle, stacked high with cans of beer. She wondered how Hazuki-san would react if she told her about the penguin and beer.
She'd probably wind up in a mental institution.
Penguins and beer... so where did the Misato girl fit in?
Asuka was still working on that.
She remembered distinctly the purple hair, the large curls on either side of her forehead. She recalled Misato going to a wedding, wearing an expensive dress of nearly the same shade.
Asuka placed one elbow on the windowsill and propped her chin up on her fist. The slightest tilting of her wrist allowed her to look down and see the busy street below.
How many cars there were.
How tall the buildings were.
How stable they looked. As if they could be shifted ten stories up or down without toppling at all.
Asuka had a sudden vision of Tokyo-3 suddenly becoming an underground city...
= = = = = =
"Asuka-chan!"
Asuka was angry at herself, pounding on her forehead with a fist now. She'd found no answers, but unearthed a series of new questions. She'd encountered the terrifying monsters that were called Angels. She had seen the huge red and purple structures. She'd heard their names. Eva.
A new word. A new mystery.
"Asuka-chan!"
Hazuki-san helped her back to her room and immediately put her to bed, at which time Asuka turned away and lay on her side, facing away from her nurse.
She was unable to stop the sniffling, as much as she hated it.
Who am I? Why am I here?
Do I have no family?
Why do I remember that monster, Eva?
"Do you want some water?"
Asuka closed her eyes tightly, trying to hold back the tears, blocking out Hazuki-san's voice. She had once been a strong-willed young woman, that she knew for sure. Probably someone who never gave any thought to anyone else before she spoke. One who cared only for herself.
So why am I not that person now?
I answer to Asuka. But I am not Sorhyu Asuka Langley anymore.
Hazuki-san stayed with her patient until the sobbing stopped and her shoulders moved up and down evenly in rhythm with her calmed breathing. As soon as she disappeared, Asuka flipped onto her back, then reached under her pillow and pulled out the tattered dress. One of the only two secrets to her identity.
She smoothed it out on the bed and wondered where it had come from. She'd certainly never worn such a dress in her dreams.
No, there'd had been something else. Something large and red. Much bigger than a dress, or even a long winter overcoat.
Asuka's eyes widened in surprise.
Eva?
It was amazing just how accustomed the nurse had become to calling her Asuka, almost as if it was a pet name.
Obligingly Asuka swung her legs over the side of the bed and shivered as her toes made contact with the cold floor. She was still barefoot and the chilliness traveled from her feet up throughout her body. The redhead folded her arms around herself. Why was it so cold in this damn place?
As usual, the nurse offered her arm and Asuka took it. In these few days she had learned much. She had learned that her nurse's name was Hazuki-san, was thirty-two, and had spent five of those years in this hospital. She had learned that this was one of the best hospitals in Japan, where many of the specialists worked. She had learned that there was a restroom to the left of her room and a small cafeteria down the hallway.
But Asuka had discovered nothing about herself, and that frustrated her immensely.
She thought back to the image on the ID card. A winking younger girl holding up two fingers in a "V" symbol, a wide smile on her face.
Her name is Sorhyu Asuka Langley.
My name is Sorhyu Asuka Langley.
But are we the same person?
In recent days, Hazuki-san had brushed out her long hair and tied it back with a thick pink ribbon. She'd futilely tried for the look in the teenage photo and finally settled on a simple ponytail, with the copper cascade fastened low on the back of Asuka's neck.
In addition, she'd brought Asuka a clean hospital gown daily but didn't insist on throwing away the rags the redhead had worn when she showed up at the hospital—how she had done so was still a mystery. Surprisingly Asuka didn't mind; the new gown was large, spacey, and smelled clean and fresh. It was a nice change from the soiled blue-green dress she had been wearing. Hazuki-san had even taken it home and washed it and mended all the rips. Asuka was quite grateful to her for that, if she could feel gratitude in her state of confusion.
How old am I?
Another question had crept into her mind. Hazuki-san had told her that she appeared about twenty-five or twenty-six, although no medical records on any Sorhyu Asuka Langleys could be found.
"You look very nice." Hazuki-san smiled, obviously proud of the young lady on her arm. "Ready to turn back now?"
Asuka shook her head.
She wanted to explore. She wanted to let go of Hazuki-san's hand and walk on her own to the open window nearby from which sunlight streamed in. Asuka could hear the sound of the cars and birds outside.
She loosened her grip on her nurse's arm and took her first wobbling steps alone, feeling foolish and frustrated.
If I can't remember how to do something as easy as walking, how will I find out who I am?
Asuka stumbled and tripped to the floor. Hazuki-san ran to her side, a sturdy arm ready, but Asuka ignored her and climbed back to her feet. The nurse backed away after seeing the determined look on her patient's face and remained a good distance away.
It took her nearly ten minutes to cover the twenty feet ahead of her, but when Asuka got there she placed both hands on the windowsill and threw her head back, feeling her hair tickle her face as it was blown backwards. She didn't mind this kind of cold. Unknown to the redhead, Hazuki-san strategically placed herself off at an angle, so that she wouldn't be interfering, but would be close enough to help should anything occur.
Asuka breathed in the fresh sweet-smelling air, and wished that she would never have to return to that stuffy room she lived in, where everything smelled of antiseptics and various medical chemicals.
She was still pretending to be mute. As much as she appreciated the efforts of her nurse, the well-meaning woman had begun practically bombarding her with questions. Since she couldn't reply vocally, Hazuki-san had brought her a pretty notebook with pale green pages bordered with pink cherry blossoms. Asuka had simply laid the book aside and turned her head away.
I'm not willing to tell Hazuki-san what I know, although I've already begun to remember.
She remembered a little bit about the kitchen. Certainly Misato had been there many times, along with a penguin. Or had her mind simply invented that detail? Asuka shook her head to clear it. A penguin in a kitchen... surely she was going mad. There was a table in the middle, stacked high with cans of beer. She wondered how Hazuki-san would react if she told her about the penguin and beer.
She'd probably wind up in a mental institution.
Penguins and beer... so where did the Misato girl fit in?
Asuka was still working on that.
She remembered distinctly the purple hair, the large curls on either side of her forehead. She recalled Misato going to a wedding, wearing an expensive dress of nearly the same shade.
Asuka placed one elbow on the windowsill and propped her chin up on her fist. The slightest tilting of her wrist allowed her to look down and see the busy street below.
How many cars there were.
How tall the buildings were.
How stable they looked. As if they could be shifted ten stories up or down without toppling at all.
Asuka had a sudden vision of Tokyo-3 suddenly becoming an underground city...
= = = = = =
"Asuka-chan!"
Asuka was angry at herself, pounding on her forehead with a fist now. She'd found no answers, but unearthed a series of new questions. She'd encountered the terrifying monsters that were called Angels. She had seen the huge red and purple structures. She'd heard their names. Eva.
A new word. A new mystery.
"Asuka-chan!"
Hazuki-san helped her back to her room and immediately put her to bed, at which time Asuka turned away and lay on her side, facing away from her nurse.
She was unable to stop the sniffling, as much as she hated it.
Who am I? Why am I here?
Do I have no family?
Why do I remember that monster, Eva?
"Do you want some water?"
Asuka closed her eyes tightly, trying to hold back the tears, blocking out Hazuki-san's voice. She had once been a strong-willed young woman, that she knew for sure. Probably someone who never gave any thought to anyone else before she spoke. One who cared only for herself.
So why am I not that person now?
I answer to Asuka. But I am not Sorhyu Asuka Langley anymore.
Hazuki-san stayed with her patient until the sobbing stopped and her shoulders moved up and down evenly in rhythm with her calmed breathing. As soon as she disappeared, Asuka flipped onto her back, then reached under her pillow and pulled out the tattered dress. One of the only two secrets to her identity.
She smoothed it out on the bed and wondered where it had come from. She'd certainly never worn such a dress in her dreams.
No, there'd had been something else. Something large and red. Much bigger than a dress, or even a long winter overcoat.
Asuka's eyes widened in surprise.
Eva?