~*~
Oblivious to the cold rain pelting down all around Ian stood absently next to his car, keys loosely hanging from his fingertips. Letting the rainwater seep into his already drenched coat. Ian made no attempt to seek shelter from the rain in the inside of his car. He made no move at all. If it wasn't for the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed he could have been mistaken for a statue.
Drops of rain pounded against the roof of his car. Bursting into tiny little bullets of water splaying towards Ian's face. He closed his eyes against the rain only to be bestowed with the sounds of Sara's bittersweet voice. The echoes of her voice and the severity of their earlier encounter activated a mental chain reaction of memories. His train of thought focused on past cruelties.
Ian opened his eyes only because he no longer felt the pouring rain beating down on him. He looked up to see a large black umbrella hovering above him. He turned around to see an old man holding the handle. His stringy blonde hair plastered against his weathered face. The man's dark protruding gaze held his.
Ian recognized the man, seeing him from time to time, as the watcher. Ian had heard very little about Lazar from Irons. Ian's own research found nothing of the man's existence yet he stood before him holding an umbrella. The man was a complete enigma. But how he had gotten so close without Ian knowing was a bit unnerving for the dark assassin. 'The rain must have drowned out the sounds of his footsteps.' Ian thought.
"Or you have lost your focus and were so rapt in your thoughts you simply did not register my presence." Ian's eyes widen. This had been the first time the watcher had approached him and spoke. 'But could the man read minds too?' he thought.
"Yes and no." Lazar replied in a thick ancient accent that Ian could not place.
"How do you mean?" Ian questioned calmly hoping to hide the uneasiness he felt.
"Like I have said you're unfocused. The walls that are usually surrounding your mind, when you are on guard, are gone. I may not know exactly what you are thinking but I can sense what you are feeling. Like now for example you feel anxious. You are still wondering how I was able to sneak up behind you without detection? "Oh, is that all?" Ian replied sarcastically. Being exposed to Sara during what little time he had with her was slowly rubbing off on Ian. Lazar gave a lopsided smile.
"And those as well. The windows to a person's soul." Lazar pointed at Ian's eyes. "Those betray you; for they hide nothing from the world. You are like an open book." Ian began to lower his head averting his gaze from Lazar's.
"Do not withdraw away from me. Look at me, Ian Nottingham." Ian wasn't too surprise that Lazar knew his name. Who knows how long Lazar had been watching over him. Ian was reluctant to comply. It wasn't an order like Irons but an undemanding request. Ian finally looked up and locked his gaze with Lazar.
"If I am an open book; then what does my tale reveal, Lazar?" The older man nodded his head and grinned as Ian addressed him.
"I sense pain and suffering. Someone once said: 'Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.' Why are you suffering, young Nottingham?"
Ian didn't answer Lazar. He only looked towards the direction of Sara's apartment. The light from the candles faintly glowed in the distance.
"You should not give up on life so easily, Ian."
"What would a vagrant know about the meaning of life?" Ian threw back bitterly.
"Hold your tongue, Ian Nottingham." Lazar's voice was calmed yet forceful. Ian had heard Lazar to be a passive and unperturbed man. But there was no mistaking the flash of anger in his eyes.
"I apologize, Lazar. I know not what I say. I am simply acting on my disheartened impulses."
His eyes no longer flashed with anger and Lazar's weathered face softened. " I understand, Ian."
"There is only one meaning of life: The act of living itself."
Ian stared at Lazar with mournful eyes. He returned his gaze back towards Sara's apartment.
"I have nothing left. What is there to live for?"
"You have a cause, a destiny." Lazar answered.
'Take the cause out of a man; there is no cause for a man.' Ian thought.
"I have no cause nor destiny, Lazar."
"Your cause is to protect the wielder of the Witchblade. It has been your destiny since the day you were born."
"How can I protect her, Lazar? She despises me! She will never let me into her life! It is best if I comply with her wishes and." Ian sighed. ".never return." Lowering his head as he spoke.
'Stubborn fools' Lazar muttered under his breath then a light chuckle escaped his throat.
Ian's looked up from his bowed head. Lazar was smiling and shaking his shaggy blonde head. Ian's brows furrowed as he tilted his head slightly to the side, confusion reflected in his eyes. And bit irritated that this man found his current 'situation' amusing. "Why do you mock my pain, Lazar?"
Lazar cleared his throat and answered. "I do no such thing, Ian."
"Then what do you find so amusing?" Lazar sighed.
"I have forgotten how strongly stubborn both you and the wielder really are."
"She is the one who is stubborn. She is the one who refuses to listen to the blade, to reason. Refuses to trust me." Ian complained like a little child.
"You have not given her any evidence to trust you, Ian."
"Are you saying I am untrustworthy of Sara?" Ian's eyes widen with uncertainty.
"No, that is not what I am saying my dear boy. Far from it actually, I am merely saying is your Lady Sara does not realize the things you have done for her. And if she does she assumes it's some sort of ploy created by Kenneth Irons to gain control over her. So you must help her understand. You must be patient with the wielder."
"I've been patient my entire life." Ian exclaimed.
"Then you've had practice, good." Lazar grinned. Ian however did not share in Lazar's humor.
"But my patients grows thin and I don't feel that I can wait any longer."
"Ian, are you so willing to leave your Lady's Sara's side? To leave her vulnerable against the evil elements that is after the Witchblade? Are you willing to break the vow you've made lifetimes ago to serve the wielder? Do you want your Lady to meet her untimely demise, alone?" Lazar questioned.
Ian pictured each scenario becoming more and more afraid for Sara's life. He couldn't bear the thought of her death. "No!" he strongly replied.
"Then do not be so willing to give up on yours. Sara needs you as you need her. Do not repeat past mistakes."
"What do you mean 'past mistakes'." Ian looked at Lazar, confused.
"The Witchblade bestowed upon you a gift. To remember past lives and to learn from them, Ian." Lazar explained. Ian nodded but another subject arose.
"What about Kenneth Irons? I do not know how to explain it but he has this hold over me that I cannot understand let alone break. I'm afraid if I don't break away I'll only be jeopardizing Sara's safety." Hearing Ian's desire to break free was a good sign. Maybe Lazar had been mistaken. Ian wasn't as stubborn as he thought. Just very determined.
"It is possible to break free from Irons."
"How?" Ian pleading with hope that Lazar held the key to his chains.
"You are much stronger then you believe." Ian shook his head no.
"Yes young Nottingham. It took a great amount of strength both mind and will to place the blade back on Sara's wrist. At that moment the chains that held you to him began to weaken.
"But how can I break a lifetime with Kenneth Irons? He is my master." Ian spoke dejectedly.
"Do not confuse gratefulness with loyalty. For you had a mistress far before you had a master. Your connection with the wielder far exceeds your .bond with Kenneth Irons. He knew about this and tried to conceal this from you by using unethical means." Lazar's face grew somber making him look much more older and ancient. He knew the 'means' Irons had used on Ian; he had witnessed many of them. Ian suffered greatly but yet he stands before Lazar and for once a golden glint of hope flickered in the depths of Ian's hazel eyes.
"When in doubt look inside yourself. Here." Lazar laid a finger against Ian' chest, above his heart. Then his forehead ".and here as well."
Lazar lowered the umbrella. Reveling that the night sky had cleared. The storm obviously had stopped sometime during their conversation. Ian raised his face up to see the mass of brightly lit stars twinkling and the glowing moon above. When he looked back down Lazar was gone.
Ian moved from his spot and turned to his car. He unlocked the door, slipped behind the wheel and revved up the engine. At that moment the power had been restored. No longer trapped in darkness as street lamps around engulfed Ian in light.
Before steering out onto the empty street Ian glanced in the rearview mirror towards Sara's building. And for the first time since he left her apartment Ian smiled. Deep in the shadows Lazar followed in suit. Flashing his own lopsided smile as he watched Ian drive away.
~*~
Sara didn't know where to start. Maybe she did but just couldn't bring herself to admit that she really cared for her stalker. It had been so hard to let anyone in her life. What was the point really? In the end she would lose them to death. 'Life was cruel' Sara thought. First she's given time to care; to love then without warning everything is drastically taken from her, leaving her alone once again. First her father was taken away while she was still young. Then while the harsh life of reality moved on Maria was taken too. And not weeks after her death her partner, Danny, was killed before her eyes.
'Oh God, why does this keep happening to me' She thought. With her father and Maria there was nothing really she could have done; she wasn't there. But with Danny she was. She stood helpless as his life drained before her eyes. How she pleaded for him to hold on and how his last words were to tell his wife he was sorry.
Sara looked up to stare at Danny. Tears threatening to fall from her eyes. This wasn't exactly how she wanted him to be in her life. Not some ghostly guide standing in her living room. She wanted him alive, living, breathing, being his wise ass self (though even in death that didn't change much). If there had been a way to save him that day she would have. Sara would have done anything. Much how she had tried with John during his kidnapping. Her heart constricted at the thought of her lover's cold body on the floor of that warehouse. She had done everything she could to save him too. But in the end both were killed and in both times she was helpless to just watch them die.
'Not this time.' She thought. 'Ian Nottingham isn't going to die because of me.'
Perhaps the feelings she held inside, the affections she warden off, had seeped through the tiny cracks in the wall that surrounded her heart. If there were a way to protect Ian Nottingham then she would gladly take it. Unlike Danny or John there was something she could do to save him from death. She had an advantage this time and she was going to take it. If it meant she had to accomplish the task with pain and heartache then so be it. Believe it or not, Ian Nottingham wasn't the only person hurting.
Danny, with his hands hidden deep inside the pockets of his coat, leaned back against the wall. Patiently waiting for Sara to explain her reasons why. He had about given up when Sara hadn't uttered a word for who knows how long. Until finally her voice broke through the silence in the loft.
"Remember the accident at the Midtown Museum? You asking me if I had seen anyone else there before the explosion?" Danny nodded his head.
"Well it was Nottingham but I'm sure you know that now." Sara paused but made no motion that she was going to stop. "I was admiring the Witchblade when he had sneaked up behind me. I caught his reflection on the glass casing and on instinct I whirled around and pointed my gun at him." Sara could actually smile about it now.
"Talk about first impressions, huh. Danny the man didn't even flinch or made an attempt to move away. He just stood there, with a gun in his face, flashed this smile, mumbled something, and left. Just like that; like it was nothing."
"The second time we meet he was this cocky bastard who, appeared out of nowhere, had the audacity to come up to me in a dark alley sprouting one of many cryptic bullshit which I've learned is part of his charming traits. Over the course of time he would pop out of shadows, drop a riddle or two, then disappear the same way he had when he showed up."
"You mean like me, but I'm more cool in my entrances and exits, right?" Danny smirked.
"No offense Danny but you're dead. You have an excuse."
"None taken but I still think I'm cooler though." Sara shook her head and grinned.
"But Notti.Ian doesn't. He was trained to be the way he is. Here's this bad ass assassin who could catch bullets with his hands, leap off building rooftops only to land gracefully like some oversized feline, and become invisible whenever he wanted too. I had always thought Ian Nottingham was invincible. That nothing could harm him let alone touch him. That is until tonight. What I saw in my visions while stuck in that elevator will haunt me probably for the rest of my life. Every time I see him I would wonder is he hurt? If he is, am I the reason why he's battered or bruised? I don't want to wonder or think about it. My life is hectic enough with the blade."
"But I thought you hated Ian?"
"I thought I did too. Besides the obvious fact that he's associated with Irons I don't think I ever hated him personally."
"How do you mean?"
"Danny you know me. I like being in control. Besides this." Sara holds up her arm to show off the dormant bracelet. "Ian Nottingham is a constant reminder that I don't have any control."
. "Don't worry you had none to being with.".
"Every time he would show up out of nowhere I just felt like he was taking what little control I had left over my life. And I was angry at myself for losing it and more angry at him for taking it."
"So what changed your mind about him?"
"This." Sara tapped at the bracelet. ".opened up my eyes."
Danny smiled. 'Wished it had opened up your heart too. Or maybe it did and you're till fighting it.' He thought but instead said.
"Sara I don't think you should shut Ian out, not now. He needs you as much you need him." Danny pleaded.
"Its best for the both of us. He doesn't need me and I don't need him." Even after the words left her lips Sara still held doubts but she wasn't about to tell Danny that.
"Are you sure it's the right thing to do?" He asked.
"Danny, I didn't have the chance to save you or John. And if I did you know damn well I'd do whatever it took to keep you two safe. I have that chance now for Ian. I'm not going to past that up." She lowered her head. There it was finally said. She was being a bitch to Ian because she wanted to protect him from Irons and maybe even from her.
Sara squinted her eyes against the lights. The power was finally back on. She wondered around the loft extinguishing the candles she had lit. As she walked around the apartment Danny had moved from the wall near the fire escape window over to the top of the stairs that lead down to her front door.
"That's it?"
She walked over to him and crossed her arms. "You wanted an explanation and I gave it to you. What else do you want me to say?"
"You never answered my question, Sara." Danny's voice sounded serious and held no hint of amusement.
"Which is?" She raised her eyebrows, a flash of irritation in her eyes.
"Are you sure pushing Ian away, shutting him out was the right thing to do?"
Sara lowered her head. Was it right? She weighed her answer. Her mind said yes but her heart was saying something else. Sara was too tired to think, all she had wanted to do was get some sleep. She didn't want to talk any more. Her eyes began to wonder until she caught sight of a silver ring left on the banister. She picked it up and immediately knew it was Ian's ring. She eyed it between her fingers. Instead of answering Danny's question Sara avoided it all together. She just wasn't sure.
"Ian forgot his ring again."
Danny wasn't upset that she didn't answer. Actually he was hoping she didn't. It was one of the many shoves he was planning on. At least this way it got her to start thinking more.
'Just wished she would hurry up and past that stubborn streak of hers.' He thought.
Danny also knew for a fact Ian didn't forget his ring. "No, he didn't forget it. He left it on purpose this time. Probably wanted to leave a little something of himself behind."
"Why?" Sara looked up but Danny was already gone. She sighed and made her way around the loft turning off the lights and headed for bed. After slipping under the covers Sara stared at the ring she placed on the nightstand. 'Why would Ian leave behind something that was so important to him?' A dreaded feeling washed over Sara as she lies there in bed. She quickly pushed the feeling aside and closed her eyes.
~*~
Oblivious to the cold rain pelting down all around Ian stood absently next to his car, keys loosely hanging from his fingertips. Letting the rainwater seep into his already drenched coat. Ian made no attempt to seek shelter from the rain in the inside of his car. He made no move at all. If it wasn't for the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed he could have been mistaken for a statue.
Drops of rain pounded against the roof of his car. Bursting into tiny little bullets of water splaying towards Ian's face. He closed his eyes against the rain only to be bestowed with the sounds of Sara's bittersweet voice. The echoes of her voice and the severity of their earlier encounter activated a mental chain reaction of memories. His train of thought focused on past cruelties.
Ian opened his eyes only because he no longer felt the pouring rain beating down on him. He looked up to see a large black umbrella hovering above him. He turned around to see an old man holding the handle. His stringy blonde hair plastered against his weathered face. The man's dark protruding gaze held his.
Ian recognized the man, seeing him from time to time, as the watcher. Ian had heard very little about Lazar from Irons. Ian's own research found nothing of the man's existence yet he stood before him holding an umbrella. The man was a complete enigma. But how he had gotten so close without Ian knowing was a bit unnerving for the dark assassin. 'The rain must have drowned out the sounds of his footsteps.' Ian thought.
"Or you have lost your focus and were so rapt in your thoughts you simply did not register my presence." Ian's eyes widen. This had been the first time the watcher had approached him and spoke. 'But could the man read minds too?' he thought.
"Yes and no." Lazar replied in a thick ancient accent that Ian could not place.
"How do you mean?" Ian questioned calmly hoping to hide the uneasiness he felt.
"Like I have said you're unfocused. The walls that are usually surrounding your mind, when you are on guard, are gone. I may not know exactly what you are thinking but I can sense what you are feeling. Like now for example you feel anxious. You are still wondering how I was able to sneak up behind you without detection? "Oh, is that all?" Ian replied sarcastically. Being exposed to Sara during what little time he had with her was slowly rubbing off on Ian. Lazar gave a lopsided smile.
"And those as well. The windows to a person's soul." Lazar pointed at Ian's eyes. "Those betray you; for they hide nothing from the world. You are like an open book." Ian began to lower his head averting his gaze from Lazar's.
"Do not withdraw away from me. Look at me, Ian Nottingham." Ian wasn't too surprise that Lazar knew his name. Who knows how long Lazar had been watching over him. Ian was reluctant to comply. It wasn't an order like Irons but an undemanding request. Ian finally looked up and locked his gaze with Lazar.
"If I am an open book; then what does my tale reveal, Lazar?" The older man nodded his head and grinned as Ian addressed him.
"I sense pain and suffering. Someone once said: 'Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.' Why are you suffering, young Nottingham?"
Ian didn't answer Lazar. He only looked towards the direction of Sara's apartment. The light from the candles faintly glowed in the distance.
"You should not give up on life so easily, Ian."
"What would a vagrant know about the meaning of life?" Ian threw back bitterly.
"Hold your tongue, Ian Nottingham." Lazar's voice was calmed yet forceful. Ian had heard Lazar to be a passive and unperturbed man. But there was no mistaking the flash of anger in his eyes.
"I apologize, Lazar. I know not what I say. I am simply acting on my disheartened impulses."
His eyes no longer flashed with anger and Lazar's weathered face softened. " I understand, Ian."
"There is only one meaning of life: The act of living itself."
Ian stared at Lazar with mournful eyes. He returned his gaze back towards Sara's apartment.
"I have nothing left. What is there to live for?"
"You have a cause, a destiny." Lazar answered.
'Take the cause out of a man; there is no cause for a man.' Ian thought.
"I have no cause nor destiny, Lazar."
"Your cause is to protect the wielder of the Witchblade. It has been your destiny since the day you were born."
"How can I protect her, Lazar? She despises me! She will never let me into her life! It is best if I comply with her wishes and." Ian sighed. ".never return." Lowering his head as he spoke.
'Stubborn fools' Lazar muttered under his breath then a light chuckle escaped his throat.
Ian's looked up from his bowed head. Lazar was smiling and shaking his shaggy blonde head. Ian's brows furrowed as he tilted his head slightly to the side, confusion reflected in his eyes. And bit irritated that this man found his current 'situation' amusing. "Why do you mock my pain, Lazar?"
Lazar cleared his throat and answered. "I do no such thing, Ian."
"Then what do you find so amusing?" Lazar sighed.
"I have forgotten how strongly stubborn both you and the wielder really are."
"She is the one who is stubborn. She is the one who refuses to listen to the blade, to reason. Refuses to trust me." Ian complained like a little child.
"You have not given her any evidence to trust you, Ian."
"Are you saying I am untrustworthy of Sara?" Ian's eyes widen with uncertainty.
"No, that is not what I am saying my dear boy. Far from it actually, I am merely saying is your Lady Sara does not realize the things you have done for her. And if she does she assumes it's some sort of ploy created by Kenneth Irons to gain control over her. So you must help her understand. You must be patient with the wielder."
"I've been patient my entire life." Ian exclaimed.
"Then you've had practice, good." Lazar grinned. Ian however did not share in Lazar's humor.
"But my patients grows thin and I don't feel that I can wait any longer."
"Ian, are you so willing to leave your Lady's Sara's side? To leave her vulnerable against the evil elements that is after the Witchblade? Are you willing to break the vow you've made lifetimes ago to serve the wielder? Do you want your Lady to meet her untimely demise, alone?" Lazar questioned.
Ian pictured each scenario becoming more and more afraid for Sara's life. He couldn't bear the thought of her death. "No!" he strongly replied.
"Then do not be so willing to give up on yours. Sara needs you as you need her. Do not repeat past mistakes."
"What do you mean 'past mistakes'." Ian looked at Lazar, confused.
"The Witchblade bestowed upon you a gift. To remember past lives and to learn from them, Ian." Lazar explained. Ian nodded but another subject arose.
"What about Kenneth Irons? I do not know how to explain it but he has this hold over me that I cannot understand let alone break. I'm afraid if I don't break away I'll only be jeopardizing Sara's safety." Hearing Ian's desire to break free was a good sign. Maybe Lazar had been mistaken. Ian wasn't as stubborn as he thought. Just very determined.
"It is possible to break free from Irons."
"How?" Ian pleading with hope that Lazar held the key to his chains.
"You are much stronger then you believe." Ian shook his head no.
"Yes young Nottingham. It took a great amount of strength both mind and will to place the blade back on Sara's wrist. At that moment the chains that held you to him began to weaken.
"But how can I break a lifetime with Kenneth Irons? He is my master." Ian spoke dejectedly.
"Do not confuse gratefulness with loyalty. For you had a mistress far before you had a master. Your connection with the wielder far exceeds your .bond with Kenneth Irons. He knew about this and tried to conceal this from you by using unethical means." Lazar's face grew somber making him look much more older and ancient. He knew the 'means' Irons had used on Ian; he had witnessed many of them. Ian suffered greatly but yet he stands before Lazar and for once a golden glint of hope flickered in the depths of Ian's hazel eyes.
"When in doubt look inside yourself. Here." Lazar laid a finger against Ian' chest, above his heart. Then his forehead ".and here as well."
Lazar lowered the umbrella. Reveling that the night sky had cleared. The storm obviously had stopped sometime during their conversation. Ian raised his face up to see the mass of brightly lit stars twinkling and the glowing moon above. When he looked back down Lazar was gone.
Ian moved from his spot and turned to his car. He unlocked the door, slipped behind the wheel and revved up the engine. At that moment the power had been restored. No longer trapped in darkness as street lamps around engulfed Ian in light.
Before steering out onto the empty street Ian glanced in the rearview mirror towards Sara's building. And for the first time since he left her apartment Ian smiled. Deep in the shadows Lazar followed in suit. Flashing his own lopsided smile as he watched Ian drive away.
~*~
Sara didn't know where to start. Maybe she did but just couldn't bring herself to admit that she really cared for her stalker. It had been so hard to let anyone in her life. What was the point really? In the end she would lose them to death. 'Life was cruel' Sara thought. First she's given time to care; to love then without warning everything is drastically taken from her, leaving her alone once again. First her father was taken away while she was still young. Then while the harsh life of reality moved on Maria was taken too. And not weeks after her death her partner, Danny, was killed before her eyes.
'Oh God, why does this keep happening to me' She thought. With her father and Maria there was nothing really she could have done; she wasn't there. But with Danny she was. She stood helpless as his life drained before her eyes. How she pleaded for him to hold on and how his last words were to tell his wife he was sorry.
Sara looked up to stare at Danny. Tears threatening to fall from her eyes. This wasn't exactly how she wanted him to be in her life. Not some ghostly guide standing in her living room. She wanted him alive, living, breathing, being his wise ass self (though even in death that didn't change much). If there had been a way to save him that day she would have. Sara would have done anything. Much how she had tried with John during his kidnapping. Her heart constricted at the thought of her lover's cold body on the floor of that warehouse. She had done everything she could to save him too. But in the end both were killed and in both times she was helpless to just watch them die.
'Not this time.' She thought. 'Ian Nottingham isn't going to die because of me.'
Perhaps the feelings she held inside, the affections she warden off, had seeped through the tiny cracks in the wall that surrounded her heart. If there were a way to protect Ian Nottingham then she would gladly take it. Unlike Danny or John there was something she could do to save him from death. She had an advantage this time and she was going to take it. If it meant she had to accomplish the task with pain and heartache then so be it. Believe it or not, Ian Nottingham wasn't the only person hurting.
Danny, with his hands hidden deep inside the pockets of his coat, leaned back against the wall. Patiently waiting for Sara to explain her reasons why. He had about given up when Sara hadn't uttered a word for who knows how long. Until finally her voice broke through the silence in the loft.
"Remember the accident at the Midtown Museum? You asking me if I had seen anyone else there before the explosion?" Danny nodded his head.
"Well it was Nottingham but I'm sure you know that now." Sara paused but made no motion that she was going to stop. "I was admiring the Witchblade when he had sneaked up behind me. I caught his reflection on the glass casing and on instinct I whirled around and pointed my gun at him." Sara could actually smile about it now.
"Talk about first impressions, huh. Danny the man didn't even flinch or made an attempt to move away. He just stood there, with a gun in his face, flashed this smile, mumbled something, and left. Just like that; like it was nothing."
"The second time we meet he was this cocky bastard who, appeared out of nowhere, had the audacity to come up to me in a dark alley sprouting one of many cryptic bullshit which I've learned is part of his charming traits. Over the course of time he would pop out of shadows, drop a riddle or two, then disappear the same way he had when he showed up."
"You mean like me, but I'm more cool in my entrances and exits, right?" Danny smirked.
"No offense Danny but you're dead. You have an excuse."
"None taken but I still think I'm cooler though." Sara shook her head and grinned.
"But Notti.Ian doesn't. He was trained to be the way he is. Here's this bad ass assassin who could catch bullets with his hands, leap off building rooftops only to land gracefully like some oversized feline, and become invisible whenever he wanted too. I had always thought Ian Nottingham was invincible. That nothing could harm him let alone touch him. That is until tonight. What I saw in my visions while stuck in that elevator will haunt me probably for the rest of my life. Every time I see him I would wonder is he hurt? If he is, am I the reason why he's battered or bruised? I don't want to wonder or think about it. My life is hectic enough with the blade."
"But I thought you hated Ian?"
"I thought I did too. Besides the obvious fact that he's associated with Irons I don't think I ever hated him personally."
"How do you mean?"
"Danny you know me. I like being in control. Besides this." Sara holds up her arm to show off the dormant bracelet. "Ian Nottingham is a constant reminder that I don't have any control."
. "Don't worry you had none to being with.".
"Every time he would show up out of nowhere I just felt like he was taking what little control I had left over my life. And I was angry at myself for losing it and more angry at him for taking it."
"So what changed your mind about him?"
"This." Sara tapped at the bracelet. ".opened up my eyes."
Danny smiled. 'Wished it had opened up your heart too. Or maybe it did and you're till fighting it.' He thought but instead said.
"Sara I don't think you should shut Ian out, not now. He needs you as much you need him." Danny pleaded.
"Its best for the both of us. He doesn't need me and I don't need him." Even after the words left her lips Sara still held doubts but she wasn't about to tell Danny that.
"Are you sure it's the right thing to do?" He asked.
"Danny, I didn't have the chance to save you or John. And if I did you know damn well I'd do whatever it took to keep you two safe. I have that chance now for Ian. I'm not going to past that up." She lowered her head. There it was finally said. She was being a bitch to Ian because she wanted to protect him from Irons and maybe even from her.
Sara squinted her eyes against the lights. The power was finally back on. She wondered around the loft extinguishing the candles she had lit. As she walked around the apartment Danny had moved from the wall near the fire escape window over to the top of the stairs that lead down to her front door.
"That's it?"
She walked over to him and crossed her arms. "You wanted an explanation and I gave it to you. What else do you want me to say?"
"You never answered my question, Sara." Danny's voice sounded serious and held no hint of amusement.
"Which is?" She raised her eyebrows, a flash of irritation in her eyes.
"Are you sure pushing Ian away, shutting him out was the right thing to do?"
Sara lowered her head. Was it right? She weighed her answer. Her mind said yes but her heart was saying something else. Sara was too tired to think, all she had wanted to do was get some sleep. She didn't want to talk any more. Her eyes began to wonder until she caught sight of a silver ring left on the banister. She picked it up and immediately knew it was Ian's ring. She eyed it between her fingers. Instead of answering Danny's question Sara avoided it all together. She just wasn't sure.
"Ian forgot his ring again."
Danny wasn't upset that she didn't answer. Actually he was hoping she didn't. It was one of the many shoves he was planning on. At least this way it got her to start thinking more.
'Just wished she would hurry up and past that stubborn streak of hers.' He thought.
Danny also knew for a fact Ian didn't forget his ring. "No, he didn't forget it. He left it on purpose this time. Probably wanted to leave a little something of himself behind."
"Why?" Sara looked up but Danny was already gone. She sighed and made her way around the loft turning off the lights and headed for bed. After slipping under the covers Sara stared at the ring she placed on the nightstand. 'Why would Ian leave behind something that was so important to him?' A dreaded feeling washed over Sara as she lies there in bed. She quickly pushed the feeling aside and closed her eyes.
~*~