Peeves was wearing a pink tutu. He started cackling, as he burst out in
another one of his bogus chants.
"Brick wall, waterfall, Potter thinks he's got it all. But he don't. And I do. So boom with that attitude. Peace, punch, Captain Crunch. I've got something you can't touch. Bang bang choo choo train. Wind me up, I do my thing. No Reeses Pieces, 7 Up. You mess with me, I'll mess you up."
"What the bloody hell did that mean?" Harry asked Ron, Hermione and Ginny as Peeve sped out of the hall.
"Harry!" Lily scolded. "Do not use those words."
"I dunno mate" Ron replied. "What is Captain Crunch? It sounds like some muggle superhero."
"It is a muggle cereal Ron," Hermione told him exasperatedly.
"It sounds familiar," Hermione said. "But I don't know where from..."
"I do!" Ginny exclaimed. "Mione- that movie we rented before we came her this summer. Some muggle movie... umm... what was it called?"
"Oh, I know this..." Hermione said. "Rick Dobson... umm... no... Rob Dickson... no... Dick Robson... Dick Robertson... Dickie Roberts!"
"Oh yeah, it was called Dickie Roberts- Former Child Star. Pretty good- for a muggle movie. But where did Peeves hear that?"
"Beats me- where'd he get the tutu you think?" Harry asked. "And when he said 'Potter thinks he's got it all', did he mean me or Dad?"
"No clue," Ron said. The adults were still laughing, but listening to their conversation discreetly.
"Probably both of us," James said, startling Harry. Harry didn't think he was listening.
"Yeah- but what about the tutu? I mean, that weirder then Peeves' usual weirdness."
"No clue."
Just then, Peeves burst through the doors of the Great Hall, this time wearing a pair of light purple silk pajamas, and burst into song.
"The moment I wake up, I reach for my smiley face cup. And get a little pour from you. Forever and ever You'll be in my fridge And I will drink you."
He concluded by pulling out a coffee mug and a bottle of International Delight coffee creamer, and adding it to the black coffee that was in the mug, took a sip, and then sped off laughing.
"Okay..." Harry said, laughing.
"What is wrong with Peeves today?" Hermione asked.
"We have no clue," Ron said, speaking for everyone at the table.
"Well, that was from a muggle commercial- for International Delight Coffee Creamer. He's getting a little obsessed with muggle things, don't you think?" Hermione replied.
"There's no way he can get as bad as dad," Ginny told Ron. "At least Peeves isn't collecting batteries."
"I second that" Ron agreed. "That would be scary."
Everyone finally finished laughing a few minutes later. Then Lily spoke up.
"I just hope he doesn't come back in here again- I am starting to get scared."
"Lils, I think we are all a little weirded out- even me, and I pull pranks all the time."
But Lily had spoken too soon. Peeves soon burst back into the Great Hall, this time wearing tight leather pants and a bushy orange clown wig. He began to sing a very strange song.
"It's been one week since you looked at me
cocked your head to the side and said I'm angry.
Five days since you laughed at me
saying get that together come back and see me.
Three days since the living room
I realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
but it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry
Hold it now and watch the hoodwink
As I make you stop, think
You'll think you're looking at Aquaman
I summon fish to the dish, although I like the Chalet Swiss
I like the sushi 'cause it's never touched a frying pan
Hot like wasabe when I bust rhymes
Big like Leann Rimes
Because I'm all about value
Bert Kaempfert's got the mad hits
You try to match wits
You try to hold me but I bust through
Gonna make a break and take a fake
I'd like a stinkin achin shake
I like vanilla, it's the finest of the flavours
Gotta see the show, cause then you'll know
The vertigo is gonna grow
Cause it's so dangerous, you'll have to sign a waiver
How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt
It's been one week since you looked at me
Threw your arms in the air and said you're crazy
Five days since you tackled me
I've still got the rug burns on both my knees
It's been three days since the afternoon
You realized it's not my fault not a moment too soon
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
And now I sit back and wait till you say you're sorry
Chickity China the Chinese chicken
You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin'
Watchin X-Files with no lights on, we're dans la maison
I hope the Smoking Man's in this one
Like Harrison Ford I'm getting Frantic
Like Sting I'm Tantric
Like Snickers, guaranteed to satisfy
Like Kurasawa I make mad films
Okay I don't make films
But if I did they'd have a samurai
Gonna get a set of better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs just so my
irons aren't always flying off the back-swing
Gotta get in tune with Sailor Moon..."
Peeves trailed off as the Bloody Baron glided into the hall. Peeves
quickly got out of the Great Hall. He was terrified of the Bloody
Baron.
Meanwhile, everyone else in the Great Hall was laughing so hard they
were crying.
"Chickity China the Chinese Chicken? You have a drumstick and your
brain stops ticking?" Harry asked. "What the bloody hell..."
"Harry!" Lily yelled.
"I have a history of taking off my shirt?" James asked.
"You do?" Sirius asked.
"No you dolt- it was part of the song."
"Okay I don't make films. But if I did they'd have a samurai?" Lily
added.
"Yep, he's a strange one that Peeves" Sirius said.
"Chickity China, the Chinese Chicken!" Drew shouted.
Everyone laughed. Until now, Harry hadn't noticed that Drew was
sitting on Sirius' lap. Harry reached over and took Drew from Sirius,
placing him on his own lap.
"That," Hermione informed them, "is a muggle song. It is called 'One
Week' and it is by Barenaked Ladies. I've heard it before."
"Barenaked Ladies?" Harry asked.
"Yeah, it's the band name." Hermione replied.
"Are they really barenaked?" Ron asked.
"Um- Ron?" Ginny asked.
"Yeah Gin?"
"They're men..."
"That's gross."
"Ron..." Ginny said exasperatedly. "They are not barenaked. It's their
band name- that's it."
"Uh- hello?" Harry said. "Drew's here..."
"Ooooh... oops- sorry Harry"
The Bloody Baron exited the Great Hall, and as soon as he did, Peeves burst back in the door, and began singing again, this time to a muggle song called 'Hey Micky' from a muggle T.V. show called Bewitched. He was wearing a blonde wig, a pair of girl's jeans, and a baggy, plain white shirt.
"Oh Mickey what a pity you don't understand
You take my by the heart when you take me by the hand.
Oh Mickey you're so pretty can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey, oh what you do, Mickey, do Mickey
Don't break my heart Mickey."
He exited the Great Hall, appearing a few seconds later dressed as a woman. A very fat one at that. He began singing "Man, I feel like a woman," by the muggle singer, Shania Twain.
"The best thing about being a woman
Is the prerogative to have a little fun and...
Oh, oh, oh, go totally crazy-forget I'm a lady
Men's shirts-short skirts
Oh, oh, oh, really go wild-yeah, doin' it in style
Oh, oh, oh, get in the action-feel the attraction
Color my hair-do what I dare
Oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free-yeah, to feel the way I feel
Man! I feel like a woman!"
Once again, he exited the Great Hall, entering a few seconds later,
this time dressed as a male farmer, complete with straw hat and overalls. He even went as far as to stick a piece of straw in his mouth, so that about half of it was sticking out of his mouth.
"Uptown girl
She's been living in her uptown world
I bet she never had a back street guy
I bet her mama never told her why
I'm gonna try for an uptown girl
She's been living in her white bread world
As long as anyone with hot blood can
And now she's looking for a downtown man
That's what I am"
Again.
"And that's about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you're 23
And are still more amused by TV shows
What the hell is ADD?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?
And later on, on the drive home
I called her mom from a pay phone
I said I was the cops
And your husbands in jail
This state looks down on sodomy
And that's about the time that bitch hung up on me
Nobody likes you when you're 23,
And are still more amused by prank phone calls,
What the hell is caller ID?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?"
Again.
"We all live in a yellow submarine, yellow submarine, yellow
submarine. We all live in a yellow submarine..."
Again.
"Oh the buzzin of the bees in the sycamore trees round the soda water
fountain. Where the lemonade springs and the bluebird sings on the Big
Rock Candy Mountain..."
Again.
"Oops- I did it again. I made you believe, we're more then just
friends. Oops you think I'm in love. That I'm sent from above. I'm
not that innocent..."
Again.
"Yellow man in Timbuktu,
Colour for both me and you
Kung fu fighting,
Dancing queen
Tribal spaceman
and all that's in between
Colours of the world
Spice up your life
Every boy and girl
Spice up your life
People of the world
Spice up your life..."
Again.
"Hit me baby one more time!..."
Again.
"You just walk in, I make you smile,
Its cool but you don't even know me,
You take an inch, I run a mile,
Can't win you're always right behind me.
And we know that you could go and find some other,
Take or leave it or just don't even bother,
caught in a craze, it's just a faze,
Or will this be around forever.
Don't you know it's going too fast,
Racing so hard you know it won't last,
Don't you know, what can't you see,
Slow it down, read the sign, so you know just where you are going.
Stop right Now
Thank you very much,
I need somebody with the human touch,
Hey you you always on the run,
Gotta slow down baby, got have some fun..."
Again.
"Tell me why, aint nothin but a heartache
Tell me why, aint nothin but a mistake
Tell me why, I never wanna hear you say
I want it that way.
But we, are two worlds apart..."
Again.
"The circle of life!"
"Under the Sea!"
"A whole new world!"
"We will, we will, rock you!"
"I love Rock and Roll!"
"Make it stop!" Harry told Ginny as he put his arm around her.
About ten minutes later, Peeves ended his prolonged singing spree with "I'm Blue" by Eiffel 65.
"Yo listen up here's a story
About a little guy that lives in a blue world
And all day and all night and everything he sees
Is just blue
Like him inside and outside
Blue his house with a blue little window
And a blue Corvette
And everything is blue for him
And himself and everybody around
Cause he ain't got nobody to listen
I'm Blue da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
I'm Blue da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
I have a blue house with a blue window
Blue is the colour of all that I wear
Blue are the streets and all the trees are too
I have a girlfriend and she is so blue
Blue are the people here that walk around
Blue like my Corvette, it's in and outside
Blue are the words I say and what I think
Blue are the feelings that live inside me
Inside and outside.
Blue his house with a blue little window
And a blue Corvette
And everything is blue for him
And himself and everybody around
Cause he ain't got nobody to listen
For this last number, Peeves had died his skin blue, and was wearing a
hideous blue suit.
A few minutes of silence after Peeve's had finished and left, then
Harry asked the question that was on everyone's mind.
"What's up with Peeves?"
A/N: Sorry about the long wait until the update. I'll try to update at least once a week from now on. Review Please!!!
(See that review button? Click it!)
"Brick wall, waterfall, Potter thinks he's got it all. But he don't. And I do. So boom with that attitude. Peace, punch, Captain Crunch. I've got something you can't touch. Bang bang choo choo train. Wind me up, I do my thing. No Reeses Pieces, 7 Up. You mess with me, I'll mess you up."
"What the bloody hell did that mean?" Harry asked Ron, Hermione and Ginny as Peeve sped out of the hall.
"Harry!" Lily scolded. "Do not use those words."
"I dunno mate" Ron replied. "What is Captain Crunch? It sounds like some muggle superhero."
"It is a muggle cereal Ron," Hermione told him exasperatedly.
"It sounds familiar," Hermione said. "But I don't know where from..."
"I do!" Ginny exclaimed. "Mione- that movie we rented before we came her this summer. Some muggle movie... umm... what was it called?"
"Oh, I know this..." Hermione said. "Rick Dobson... umm... no... Rob Dickson... no... Dick Robson... Dick Robertson... Dickie Roberts!"
"Oh yeah, it was called Dickie Roberts- Former Child Star. Pretty good- for a muggle movie. But where did Peeves hear that?"
"Beats me- where'd he get the tutu you think?" Harry asked. "And when he said 'Potter thinks he's got it all', did he mean me or Dad?"
"No clue," Ron said. The adults were still laughing, but listening to their conversation discreetly.
"Probably both of us," James said, startling Harry. Harry didn't think he was listening.
"Yeah- but what about the tutu? I mean, that weirder then Peeves' usual weirdness."
"No clue."
Just then, Peeves burst through the doors of the Great Hall, this time wearing a pair of light purple silk pajamas, and burst into song.
"The moment I wake up, I reach for my smiley face cup. And get a little pour from you. Forever and ever You'll be in my fridge And I will drink you."
He concluded by pulling out a coffee mug and a bottle of International Delight coffee creamer, and adding it to the black coffee that was in the mug, took a sip, and then sped off laughing.
"Okay..." Harry said, laughing.
"What is wrong with Peeves today?" Hermione asked.
"We have no clue," Ron said, speaking for everyone at the table.
"Well, that was from a muggle commercial- for International Delight Coffee Creamer. He's getting a little obsessed with muggle things, don't you think?" Hermione replied.
"There's no way he can get as bad as dad," Ginny told Ron. "At least Peeves isn't collecting batteries."
"I second that" Ron agreed. "That would be scary."
Everyone finally finished laughing a few minutes later. Then Lily spoke up.
"I just hope he doesn't come back in here again- I am starting to get scared."
"Lils, I think we are all a little weirded out- even me, and I pull pranks all the time."
But Lily had spoken too soon. Peeves soon burst back into the Great Hall, this time wearing tight leather pants and a bushy orange clown wig. He began to sing a very strange song.
"It's been one week since you looked at me
cocked your head to the side and said I'm angry.
Five days since you laughed at me
saying get that together come back and see me.
Three days since the living room
I realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
but it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry
Hold it now and watch the hoodwink
As I make you stop, think
You'll think you're looking at Aquaman
I summon fish to the dish, although I like the Chalet Swiss
I like the sushi 'cause it's never touched a frying pan
Hot like wasabe when I bust rhymes
Big like Leann Rimes
Because I'm all about value
Bert Kaempfert's got the mad hits
You try to match wits
You try to hold me but I bust through
Gonna make a break and take a fake
I'd like a stinkin achin shake
I like vanilla, it's the finest of the flavours
Gotta see the show, cause then you'll know
The vertigo is gonna grow
Cause it's so dangerous, you'll have to sign a waiver
How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're mad
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt
It's been one week since you looked at me
Threw your arms in the air and said you're crazy
Five days since you tackled me
I've still got the rug burns on both my knees
It's been three days since the afternoon
You realized it's not my fault not a moment too soon
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
And now I sit back and wait till you say you're sorry
Chickity China the Chinese chicken
You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin'
Watchin X-Files with no lights on, we're dans la maison
I hope the Smoking Man's in this one
Like Harrison Ford I'm getting Frantic
Like Sting I'm Tantric
Like Snickers, guaranteed to satisfy
Like Kurasawa I make mad films
Okay I don't make films
But if I did they'd have a samurai
Gonna get a set of better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs just so my
irons aren't always flying off the back-swing
Gotta get in tune with Sailor Moon..."
Peeves trailed off as the Bloody Baron glided into the hall. Peeves
quickly got out of the Great Hall. He was terrified of the Bloody
Baron.
Meanwhile, everyone else in the Great Hall was laughing so hard they
were crying.
"Chickity China the Chinese Chicken? You have a drumstick and your
brain stops ticking?" Harry asked. "What the bloody hell..."
"Harry!" Lily yelled.
"I have a history of taking off my shirt?" James asked.
"You do?" Sirius asked.
"No you dolt- it was part of the song."
"Okay I don't make films. But if I did they'd have a samurai?" Lily
added.
"Yep, he's a strange one that Peeves" Sirius said.
"Chickity China, the Chinese Chicken!" Drew shouted.
Everyone laughed. Until now, Harry hadn't noticed that Drew was
sitting on Sirius' lap. Harry reached over and took Drew from Sirius,
placing him on his own lap.
"That," Hermione informed them, "is a muggle song. It is called 'One
Week' and it is by Barenaked Ladies. I've heard it before."
"Barenaked Ladies?" Harry asked.
"Yeah, it's the band name." Hermione replied.
"Are they really barenaked?" Ron asked.
"Um- Ron?" Ginny asked.
"Yeah Gin?"
"They're men..."
"That's gross."
"Ron..." Ginny said exasperatedly. "They are not barenaked. It's their
band name- that's it."
"Uh- hello?" Harry said. "Drew's here..."
"Ooooh... oops- sorry Harry"
The Bloody Baron exited the Great Hall, and as soon as he did, Peeves burst back in the door, and began singing again, this time to a muggle song called 'Hey Micky' from a muggle T.V. show called Bewitched. He was wearing a blonde wig, a pair of girl's jeans, and a baggy, plain white shirt.
"Oh Mickey what a pity you don't understand
You take my by the heart when you take me by the hand.
Oh Mickey you're so pretty can't you understand
It's guys like you Mickey, oh what you do, Mickey, do Mickey
Don't break my heart Mickey."
He exited the Great Hall, appearing a few seconds later dressed as a woman. A very fat one at that. He began singing "Man, I feel like a woman," by the muggle singer, Shania Twain.
"The best thing about being a woman
Is the prerogative to have a little fun and...
Oh, oh, oh, go totally crazy-forget I'm a lady
Men's shirts-short skirts
Oh, oh, oh, really go wild-yeah, doin' it in style
Oh, oh, oh, get in the action-feel the attraction
Color my hair-do what I dare
Oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free-yeah, to feel the way I feel
Man! I feel like a woman!"
Once again, he exited the Great Hall, entering a few seconds later,
this time dressed as a male farmer, complete with straw hat and overalls. He even went as far as to stick a piece of straw in his mouth, so that about half of it was sticking out of his mouth.
"Uptown girl
She's been living in her uptown world
I bet she never had a back street guy
I bet her mama never told her why
I'm gonna try for an uptown girl
She's been living in her white bread world
As long as anyone with hot blood can
And now she's looking for a downtown man
That's what I am"
Again.
"And that's about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you're 23
And are still more amused by TV shows
What the hell is ADD?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?
And later on, on the drive home
I called her mom from a pay phone
I said I was the cops
And your husbands in jail
This state looks down on sodomy
And that's about the time that bitch hung up on me
Nobody likes you when you're 23,
And are still more amused by prank phone calls,
What the hell is caller ID?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?"
Again.
"We all live in a yellow submarine, yellow submarine, yellow
submarine. We all live in a yellow submarine..."
Again.
"Oh the buzzin of the bees in the sycamore trees round the soda water
fountain. Where the lemonade springs and the bluebird sings on the Big
Rock Candy Mountain..."
Again.
"Oops- I did it again. I made you believe, we're more then just
friends. Oops you think I'm in love. That I'm sent from above. I'm
not that innocent..."
Again.
"Yellow man in Timbuktu,
Colour for both me and you
Kung fu fighting,
Dancing queen
Tribal spaceman
and all that's in between
Colours of the world
Spice up your life
Every boy and girl
Spice up your life
People of the world
Spice up your life..."
Again.
"Hit me baby one more time!..."
Again.
"You just walk in, I make you smile,
Its cool but you don't even know me,
You take an inch, I run a mile,
Can't win you're always right behind me.
And we know that you could go and find some other,
Take or leave it or just don't even bother,
caught in a craze, it's just a faze,
Or will this be around forever.
Don't you know it's going too fast,
Racing so hard you know it won't last,
Don't you know, what can't you see,
Slow it down, read the sign, so you know just where you are going.
Stop right Now
Thank you very much,
I need somebody with the human touch,
Hey you you always on the run,
Gotta slow down baby, got have some fun..."
Again.
"Tell me why, aint nothin but a heartache
Tell me why, aint nothin but a mistake
Tell me why, I never wanna hear you say
I want it that way.
But we, are two worlds apart..."
Again.
"The circle of life!"
"Under the Sea!"
"A whole new world!"
"We will, we will, rock you!"
"I love Rock and Roll!"
"Make it stop!" Harry told Ginny as he put his arm around her.
About ten minutes later, Peeves ended his prolonged singing spree with "I'm Blue" by Eiffel 65.
"Yo listen up here's a story
About a little guy that lives in a blue world
And all day and all night and everything he sees
Is just blue
Like him inside and outside
Blue his house with a blue little window
And a blue Corvette
And everything is blue for him
And himself and everybody around
Cause he ain't got nobody to listen
I'm Blue da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
I'm Blue da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
da ba dee da ba daa
I have a blue house with a blue window
Blue is the colour of all that I wear
Blue are the streets and all the trees are too
I have a girlfriend and she is so blue
Blue are the people here that walk around
Blue like my Corvette, it's in and outside
Blue are the words I say and what I think
Blue are the feelings that live inside me
Inside and outside.
Blue his house with a blue little window
And a blue Corvette
And everything is blue for him
And himself and everybody around
Cause he ain't got nobody to listen
For this last number, Peeves had died his skin blue, and was wearing a
hideous blue suit.
A few minutes of silence after Peeve's had finished and left, then
Harry asked the question that was on everyone's mind.
"What's up with Peeves?"
A/N: Sorry about the long wait until the update. I'll try to update at least once a week from now on. Review Please!!!
(See that review button? Click it!)