Disclaimer: I used to think that I owned Inuyasha, but many, many lawsuits finally convinced me otherwise. Oh yeah, and "Clubbin'" belongs to Marques Houston and R. Kelly.
CH. 10: Unexpected Turn Of Events
Shippo was scurrying back to the village with a grin on his face that would make Hojo-the-dense-man jealous. He had just left Sango and Miroku to their devices, and he was POSITIVE that they had started doing some weird grownup thing, like confessing their undying devotion to each other or complaining about their achin' backs. Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks. There was a strange yet familiar scent in the air……the young fox demon eagerly sniffed the air as if he was looking for waffles, until realization hit him. His eyes widened as he saw where the scent had come from and who it was.
"Naraku……."
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Miroku and Sango stood in awkward silence until Miroku said," Ladies first, Sango. What is it you wanted to tell me?"
Sango hesitantly started," Houshi-sama………." Inhaling deeply, she boldly stated," I know what is to happen in the future"
Miroku's jaw dropped to the ground and he stuttered," H-h-how, wh-wh-why, w-w-w-whe-when, w-what….."
Sango's eyes suddenly burned a blood-red color and she let out in a deeper voice," I foresee your death……"
Suddenly Sango's form melted and twisted into everybody's favorite villain, Naraku.
Regaining his composure, Miroku, with his staff in a battle stance, cried out," Naraku!"
Naraku started his "evil laugh", "Kukukukukuku-HACK!" Suddenly, he started coughing and wheezing for breath. Miroku facefaulted. Taking a sip from a water flask at his side, Naraku asked," Do you realize how stressful it is on my vocal cords to laugh like that every 3 seconds? But anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, *ahem* KUKUKUUKUKKUKUUUUUU!"
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As soon as Shippo had double-checked the air to make sure he was right in his assumption, he hightailed it to Inuyasha.
"INUYASHA, INUYASHA!! IT'S NARAKU! HE'S GOT MIROKU CORNERED! YOU GOTTA HELP HIM!!"
But Inuyasha was not to be budged from his lava-lamp reverie.
A lightbulb popped up above Shippo's head, flickered, died, then came back from the great beyond as the mini-demon had an idea. He pointed in the general direction of Miroku and Naraku's location and yelled," Is that Kikyo I smell?!"
Inuyasha perked up and broke his eye contact with the hippie delight and hopefully asked," Really?"
Nodding vigorously, Shippo commanded," FETCH BOY!"
And off Inuyasha went, on all fours.
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As Miroku was dealing with the asthmatic-wannabe and Shippo was messing with the lava-lamp-addict, the real Sango had gone with Kei to the well to pick up Kagome. (A/N: Yes, I know that she just went back home last chapter, but deal with it, okay peoples? Just think happy thoughts and keep reading…..) The trio was talking about their favorite thing: CheesyPuffs.
Kei bubbled," I just LOVE how they are crunchy yet weightless at the same time!"
Kagome added," And OH, that CHEESE! YUM!"
Sango sweatdropped and said," Okaaaaaay……."
Suddenly, they heard a high-pitched scream coming from Inuyasha's forest.
Kagome thought aloud," That kinda sounded like a guy…."
Kei, with happy tears, said," I SALUTE YOU, FELLOW GIRLY MAN!"
Sango urgently pressed," Let's go check it out. Somebody could be in trouble!"
And so the girls raced off to see what the heck was going on.
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"EEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKKKK!"
Inuyasha, his brain fully functional again, heard the girly scream of anguish and thought, Kikyo must be in trouble. I gotta go save her!
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"EEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKK!" Naraku cried, as he sat bawling on the ground.
"*hiccup* I-I-I-I BROKE A NAIL!!! WAAAAHHHH!!!"
Flashback to 2 minutes ago……
"Die, insolent monk!" Naraku cried, charging Miroku. However, he didn't notice the root sticking out of the ground and, of course, he was introduced to Inuyasha's good friend dirt.
Back to now…….
Inuyasha suddenly shwooped in from the treetops and asked," Kikyo? Are you over here?"
Miroku looked at him, astounded at his one-track-mindedness, while Naraku screeched," YOU DARE MENTION THAT WENCH WHILE I'M HERE WRITHING IN PAIN BECAUSE PINKIE-SAMA'S NAIL BROKE?!" He pointed an accusing finger at Inuyasha and darkly muttered," You're even more vile than I assumed, half-breed."
Inuyasha jeered," When you assume, you make an "ass" out of "u" and "me"!" (A/N: LOL, have you ever heard that? Story of my life. Ass-u-me ^.^)
Naraku didn't get a chance to give a retort, for the girls then came crashing through the bushes and yelled," HeeLLOOOOO!! Anybody need help?!"
Naraku waving his arms, called," Over here! Fashion emergency!" Sango and Kagome sweatdropped at the villain, but Kei zoomed right up to him and started treating "Pinkie-sama", all the while coo-ing that everything would be all right. When his pinkie was no longer in critical condition, Naraku leapt to his feet and started in full-blown villain speech," NOW THAT PINKIE-SAMA IS BETTER, I SHALL DESTROY ALL OF YOU, JUST BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT! KUKUKUKUKUKUKUUUUU!!"
But before Naraku could get to smiting anyone, Shippo came waltzing in the clearing, Kagome's CD player and earphones on, while singing," Last call, for alcohol…"
Kei chirped," Sake? Count me in!"
Naraku cheered," A-MEN, girlfriend!
Miroku dared," Last one to the tavern has to pay!"
And so poor Shippo was left in the dust by the sake-deprived youths.
BLOOPERS!
Blooper 1:
There was a strange yet familiar scent in the air……the young fox demon eagerly sniffed the air as if he was looking for waffles, until realization hit him.
"Ewww, who cut the cheese?"
Blooper 2:
Suddenly, they heard a high-pitched scream coming from Inuyasha's forest.
Kagome cackled," HAHAHAHAA!! My Kikyo traps worked perfectly!"
Blooper 3:
Inuyasha, now having his brain fully functional again, heard the girly scream of anguish and thought, Kikyo must be in trouble. I must go make Kagome jealous by cheating on her with my dead ex-girlfriend!