Disclaimer: Okay, if you don't realize that I don't own Inuyasha by now, then you must be in special ed.
CH. 12: Sango and the 7 Naiveté's
All was calm and peaceful in Touya's Tavern.
"WHAT?!?!?!?!?!" Miroku yelled.
Or maybe not.
"It's the truth! You declared your everlasting love for Naraku in front of Sango!" Kagome yelled back.
Naraku raised a hand and said," I'll vouch for that."
Kei stormed up to Miroku and shrieked," WE ARE SO THROUGH HOUSHI-SAMA-CHAN!" kicked him on the shins, and ran off crying to a random corner.
Shippo called out," Player! Pimp! Maninizer AND womanizer!"
"Can we all try to rationally talk this out?"
Everybody froze. Not actually because the person asked them to, only out of shock. Inuyasha had calmly and quietly asked them to shut up in nice-people terms.
Naraku bug-eyed, abrubtly ran out the door.
Kei screamed," THE APOCALYPSE HAS COME! CROSSDESSERS AND PUPPIES FIRST!!!!" and he promptly dove under the table.
Kagome reached over and felt Inuyasha's forehead and said," Nope, no fever. What's gotten into you, Inuyasha?"
Miroku, stifling his laughter, pointed under the table and said," I do believe that Kei-san needs some help." And there Kei was, rocking back and forth with bug eyes, murmuring unintelligible nonsense.
Inuyasha, sipping a cup of tea that had magically appeared in his hands, serenely said," Kaede-baba has been giving me and Kikyo relationship counseling. We were able to soothe our souls and are now back on speaking terms."
Miroku urgently cut in," I'm sure we would all LOVE to hear about your lovely anger management course with the dirtbag, but WHERE is Sango-chan?!"
*********************
Flashback to 20 minutes ago…….
Sango, passed out in an open field, was being pelted by the falling rain. A figure running by noticed her, hesitated, then picked her up and continued on its way.
Now……
Sango thought, This is SO not happening to me.
She had woken up unusually warm for having fallen asleep on the ground, but she had soon found out the where and why.
She was in the middle of any teen girl's sick fantasy.
You see, the person that had picked her up was actually a guy. A guy that lived in the middle of the forest. A really HOT guy that lived with his equally hot 6 brothers. A family of guys that had never met a woman before.
And now they were treating her like a goddess.
"Sango-sama, would you like some more food?-or possibly a drink?" a brunette formerly introduced as Reisho asked.
"Really, I'm fine. And I told you before, please just call me Sango," Sango protested.
"I know just what you need, Sango-sama. GROUP HUG!" a blonde named Hikou exclaimed.
The boys swarmed Sango and engulfed her in their "family hug". But, despite how creeped out she was, Sango couldn't help but be touched by their sweetness and sincerity.
Looks like Miroku's got some competion.
******************
After convincing Kei that the apocalypse had indeed NOT yet come, they had gone outside to search for their MIA (A/N: that's "missing in action" for all you slow people out there like me….) femme fatale.
Kei whined," I don't WANNA search in the mud! This is a new kimono!"
Kagome, suddenly enlightened, turned to Inuyasha and asked," Hey Inuyasha, with your nose I'll bet that you could find Sango easily!"
Inuyasha, the tea's effect wearing off on him, said," Feh" but started sniffing the ground half-heartedly.
Shippo cried," Alright, I am SO tired of your stupid attitude problem, Inuyasha. SUGAR ATTACK!" And with that, he shoved 20 pixie sticks down Inuyasha's throat. Inuyasha gagged, choked, then swallowed. Then he flopped over and lay twitching on the ground. Miroku poked him and asked," Is he dead?" Shippo solemnly prayed over him chanting," May he rest in peeeeace."
Suddenly, the hanyou perked up and leapt to his feet. He had the biggest grin on his face and he appeared to be in SD (A/N: Or, as some people may call it, chibi) mode. He pounced the ground and started energetically sniffing, almost inhaling the mud. He swiftly caught Sango's scent and ran, singing,"
Follow my nose
Wherever it goes
To the flavors of fruit
Or to a Taigiya's hiding spot!"
Sweatdropping and trying not to die laughing, Kagome, Shippo, Miroku and Kei followed behind.
Miroku thought, Sango………..I'm coming. Wait for me……….
BLOOPERS!!!
Blooper 1:
Miroku urgently cut in," I'm sure we would all LOVE to hear about your lovely anger management course with the dirtbag, but WHERE is Sango-chan?!"
*******
Somewhere off on a sandy beach in the south of Florida, Sango, garbed in a blue one-piece swimsuit and being drooled at by countless cabana boys, sneezed.
Blooper 2:
Sango thought, This is SO not happening to me.
She shrieked," I'M ALL COVERED in MUD! Ewwwwwww, get it off, get it off!"