A Ranma ½ - Suikoden crossover fanfiction
Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma ½ or the entire Suikoden series. But I do wish that I own a certain psychotic prince that wants nothing but to kill everybody in sight as he shouts 'Die pigs, die! Bwahahahahahah!' Er… doc? I think I'm gonna need my medication again.
Timeline: Ranma ½ takes place a few months after he learned the Hiryu Shoten Ha. Suikoden series takes place in II, just after Riou and the others drove back Solon Jhee at North Window.
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"Geez, how do you turn this thing on? Stupid machine," the pigtailed boy grumbled. Feeling frustrated, he slapped the side of the video cam hard in a crude attempt to get it to work. The people gathered around him sweatdropped at the sight.
"You brought it to this world not knowing how to use it?" Tengaar, a redheaded woman, asked incredulously. "Ranma, I'm sorry to say this but you have just reached another level of stupidity."
"Congratulations," a young girl praised in an absolutely arctic monotone.
Hix, a man in a sleeveless jacket, sweated. "It's not like that Sarah."
"Actually, it is like that," a young man garbed in a Harmonian suit countered. "Sarah, always remember that Ranma's goal is to become the most idiotic True Rune Bearer in the world. And the more he does stupid things, the closer he is in claiming that title."
"Luc!" the redhead hissed.
Sarah blinked once then nodded. "I understand."
"No Sarah, you don't have to listen to this egomaniac," Tengaar said before she deftly tossed Luc out of the room. "Sarah, Leknaat's your master, right? So you should listen to her and only her."
"Understood," Sarah answered after a moment of consideration. "From now on, I will only follow my master's teachings and mannerisms, starting with her strict rule to always wear transparent undergarments in bed."
Everyone, save for a preoccupied Ranma, froze for one second before performing a massive face fault. Hix stayed on the ground, not wanting to receive the brunt of his girlfriend's steadily building ire.
"No!" Tengaar exclaimed with a flushed face. "What I mean is you should imitate what she does for a living, and not what she does in her pastime.
Sarah nodded. "I see. I should always visit young boys in their sleep to talk about fate and destiny."
"Argh!" Tengaar was ready to pull her hair out when a casual comment from Ranma caught her attention.
"Say, the cam is working," Ranma said, completely oblivious to Tengaar's vain attempt at motherhood, or the growing vein on her forehead. "I just never noticed this red thingy blinking."
Finding her scapegoat, Tengaar pulled at Ranma's ear and shouted, "Ranma! You and Leticia found her, and since she's not here, you raise her yourself! Give her some decent advice would you?"
"Sarah," Ranma began as he tried to get his hearing back. He thought for a moment then sighed out, "Just don't do anything we would do."
"…That request is more than acceptable," Sarah replied, a thin smile on her usually frowning lips.
A few minutes passed, and the group was gathered in front of the camcorder. Aside from Sarah, they were all holding a glass of wine in their hands. The group was completely oblivious to the camcorder's use, except for Ranma, but that wasn't saying much. Hix voiced his confusion. "So, what does this thing actually do? Is it like that camera you showed us earlier?"
Ranma smiled. "Something like that. This one doesn't capture one single moment. It captures certain events in life you want to view later on."
Luc sighed and decided to simplify it further. "It's a memory bank like that crystal ball Lady Leknaat keeps around."
"Oh." That was all that needed to be said, really.
Ranma cleared his throat and raised his glass. "Well, here's to our memories."
"To our memories," Hix and Tengaar seconded, raising their glass as well.
"Hopefully more pleasant ones," Luc muttered, fulfilling his role as the eternal cynic.
The group was about to drink to it when suddenly…
"Kuueee!"
"Ah! Don't do it, Fubuki!"
Fzzzzzttttt…
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Stars Shining in the Moonlight
By: Insane Blight
Fugue
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"What is it Ranma?" Akane asked, wondering what was on her fiancé's mind.
"Nothin'," the pigtailed boy mumbled, brilliant blue eyes darting left and right every now and then.
Unaware of his actions, Akane casually placed her hands behind her back as she looked up at the sky. "It's nice you know."
Clearly not understanding what she meant, Ranma settled for blinking twice to show his confusion.
Akane was about to call him names but decided against it. There was no need to ruin the mood. "Haven't you noticed how peaceful it has been lately? It's nice to know that there is still some peaceful times left in this chaos-ridden ward. I mean-mrff…!"
Ranma suddenly covered her mouth with his hand.
Breaking free from his hold, the visibly flushed Tendo girl growled, "What was that for?!"
"Shhh!" the pigtailed boy shushed, slightly frantic eyes staring intently into hers. "I know how peaceful it has gotten Akane and I'm happy for the change of pace. I just don't wanna…"
"Sweeto!"
"…Jinx it," he finished lamely, burying his face in his hand. Akane voiced her own displeasure with a simple groan.
"Ranma, Akane-chan, it's been a long time!" Happosai exclaimed as he blurred to latch onto Akane's chest.
Only to be elbowed on the noggin by Ranma.
"Nice to see ya too, pervert."
Happosai flipped back up, unleashing a large amount of angry ki. "How dare you, Ranma!"
But Ranma, or Ranma-chan thanks in part to the old ladle lady, was already two steps ahead of the diminutive pervert. Unbuttoning the top part of her Chinese clothes, she showed her cleavage to the awestruck pervert and teased, "Happi-chan, do you like what ya see?"
"I knew you'd come around Ranma-chan!" Tears of joy formed around Happosai's eyes as he lunged for the redhead.
Ranma-chan twitched at the comment before nabbing the pervert by his clothes, halting his advance. As Happi stared at her in confusion, she turned around and forced the old grandmaster to face the mob of angry women that had been chasing after him. "He's all yours ladies."
The mob didn't waste time, as they swiftly delivered divine punishment to the real enemy of women.
"Take that!"
"You perverted freak!"
Despite all this, Happi managed to shout at the pigtailed girl. "I won't forgive you for this, Ranma!"
"What else is new?" Ranma-chan mumbled to herself as she and Akane briskly walked away from the scene. As the two girls headed home, a thought suddenly occurred to the redhead. "Hey, 'Kane…"
"Hmm?"
"…It's the 14th today, right?" Ranma-chan asked in a subdued voice.
Akane nodded, though slightly confused at the sudden inquiry. "That's right."
The redhead looked into the distance, a sad smile appearing on her face. "I see…"
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That night, everyone gathered around the dining table to eat dinner. Strangely enough, peace and quiet reigned over the room. There was not a peep coming from Genma and Ranma, nor from anybody else. Everyone seemed content with simply enjoying the wonderful meal Kasumi laid out for them. Though in reality, the Tendo sisters felt a little uneasy at the sudden change in routine.
Kasumi and Nabiki were worried and curious, respectively. The minute the Saotome duo entered the room, they could tell that something was wrong, very wrong. Both sisters quickly noted that Genma hadn't attempted to steal his son's food. He even hadn't insulted him yet. He just sat there, eating his dinner like… like a normal person.
On the other hand, Akane wasn't quite as observant to Genma's strange behavior since she was too busy studying the pigtailed teen sitting beside her. Ranma had that pensive look on his face for well over a week now and it was starting to get on her nerves. Just what was he thinking about? Why was he asking what day it was? Was he thinking about her or was he thinking about his other fiancées? Was it another challenge from Ryoga? A new martial arts move? The upcoming exams? The food Kasumi made? She blinked a few times before furiously shaking her head. This was getting her nowhere. 'Better to ask him directly,' she decided, nodding to herself."Hey Ranma, can I ask you a question?"
The boy in question blinked, as if snapped out of a deep trance. As the source of the voice registered in his mind, he turned towards his fiancée and stared at her in befuddlement. "Huh? You say somethin' Akane?"
Akane's hands twitched. Thankfully, she didn't lose her cool yet. "What's with you these days? You've been zoning out for long periods of time!"
Ranma bowed and sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry, just been thinking 'bout some things."
"Is it one of your fiancées, Ranma-kun?" Nabiki inquired, causing Akane's hands to twitch again.
"You're way off, Nabiki."
"Is it another challenge from Ryoga?"
Seeing it was Kasumi who asked this time, he politely shook his head.
"Maybe it's Happosai, sis," Nabiki joked.
"Do I look like someone that thinks about ancient perverts?!"
Soun cleared his throat. "Nabiki, maybe Ranma-kun's just trying to come up with a new technique?"
The middle Tendo girl stared at her father with a blank face. "That's… the smartest thing you've said so far, daddy."
"Look!" Ranma slammed his hand on the table, making Kasumi to gasp out her typical response while also stopping Soun's inevitable moaning about him losing his daughter's respect. "I just need some time alone! Is that too much ta ask?!"
The Tendo family watched, aghast, as the pigtailed boy got up and angrily stomped out of the room. Genma decided it was time to speak up, before three of the four Tendos started seeking out his son's blood. "Tendo-kun, everyone, please leave him be for now."
Soun regarded Genma with a stern look. "Saotome-kun, do you know what's going on with your son?"
Genma replied with another uncharacteristic display of silence.
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/Boy./ Panda-Genma opened the door to the Tendo guest room, hoping to find his moody son. Ranma was there, but he hardly resembled the cocky martial artist that everyone in Nerima, save him, came to know. It was just as he thought. His boy was curled up around the corner, head hung low, and the air of depression around him probably even surpassed the depression he felt long ago.
"Pop… today's the day…" the pigtailed boy whispered.
/I figured as much…/ Panda-Genma sat next to his son and placed a comforting paw on his shoulder. Flipping the sign, he growled and tapped the boy's shoulder a few times. /What's the matter with you? You're a Saotome, right? Start acting like one!/
Slightly annoyed at the constant paw taps, Ranma looked up and read the sign. He quickly sent a glare of artic levels toward his father. "If you're going to make a joke about this, then just leave."
Another sign appeared out of nowhere. /Fine! Cute pandas generally stay away from weak little girls anyways./
"Dammit pop, be serious!"
And so he did. Genma, even in panda form, conveyed his seriousness by staring straight into his son's eyes while firmly holding up a sign. /Boy, I'll be honest with you. These feelings you're having may never go away./ He flipped the sign before Ranma could say anything. /But don't look at it like it's a bad thing. Think of it as a blessing in disguise. Learn from it instead of fearing it. Doing so will only make you a stronger and a better person in the end./
In an instant, the anger the pigtailed boy felt disappeared. He smiled and gave his father a look of gratitude. "Thanks pop, this means a lot ta me."
/Don't mention it./ Without warning, Panda-Genma smacked his son's head with the wooden sign.
"What was that for?!"
/That's for acting like a weak little girl!/
"Stupid pop!"
/Insolent boy!/
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"Honestly Ranma, couldn't you do your arguments in the morning?" Akane's eyes were half-lidded and bloodshot, a testament to her lack of sleep. She was glad though. Ranma seemed to be back to his old self. Whatever Mr. Saotome said to him really lifted his spirit, to the point that he was becoming even more annoyingly arrogant than ever before.
"He started it, 'Kane." Ranma sported several bruises on his face, the most noticeable being the shinai dent smack-dab in the middle.
"And you felt compelled to go along with it," the youngest Tendo sighed exasperatedly.
"Hmph, it ain't like you're any different," he muttered.
"What was that?"
Not in the mood to see, or hear, another one of their arguments, Nabiki stepped in before Ranma could say anything more thus inadvertently saving him from Akane's immediate wrath. "I hate to interrupt this lover's quarrel but we really do need to get going."
Akane slowly backed down. "You're right, sis. This idiot's just not worth it."
"At least this idiot doesn't create slime monsters out of plain ol' flour!"
"You…! Hmph! At least I'm not a pervert like you."
"Says the girl that barged in while I was in the furo!"
Once again, their argument quickly degenerated to childish bickering. Nabiki shrugged nonchalantly as she went past the two. Oh well, at least she tried. Unsurprisingly, Akane's war cry was followed by an airborne pigtailed martial artist seconds later. She watched in slight amusement as Akane stormed past her, growling out several insults intended for her fiancé. She waited till her sister was out of earshot before saying in a mockingly cute tone, "Ah, young love… Ugh, I think I'm gonna be sick."
All in all, things seemed to be back to normal. The pigtailed boy quickly recovered from the blow, gracefully landing just outside the school grounds, where his other fiancée, Kuonji Ukyou, was currently at. "Akane-han again, Ranchan?"
"Stupid tomboy, I was only tellin' the truth. She can't cook even if her life depended on it." Ranma grumbled as he joined the okonomiyaki chef.
From out of nowhere, Ukyou pulled out one of her deluxe okonomiyaki and presented it to her fiancé with a smile. "Here you go Ranchan, this'll cheer you up!"
Ranma instantly brightened. "Thanks Ucchan! Your okonomiyaki's the best!"
Wham!
"What did I do nooooow?!" the pigtailed boy yelled before he got sent flying once more by his mallet-wielding fiancée.
Moments later, Ranma woke up on an empty lot, a good distance away from the school. Wincing slightly, he climbed up the crater formed by his landing, looked around for a bit, before sighing and dusting himself off. "I can't believe she sent me even farther than before," he mused. "Well, at least this day ain't gettin' any worse than it already is."
"Ranma, for making Akane angry, prepare to die!"
"Saotome, you will never have my Shampoo!"
"Foul sorcerer! I shall smite thee!"
The pigtailed boy sat back down and stared blankly at his oncoming rivals. Looking up to the heavens, he groaned, "Why me?"
Yup, things were back to normal all right.
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That night, the Tendo's and the Saotome's have gathered around the dining table to eat dinner. As usual, Kasumi served everyone with a beaming smile. Sitting beside her was Nabiki, who looked a lot more thoughtful than normal. Soun sat there and quietly ate his food. Genma was back to inhaling his meal while stealing some off his son's rice bowl. Said pigtailed boy paid no heed to it since he was busy making faces at Akane. Akane retaliated in kind, sticking her tongue out in childish fashion.
"Why did you have to hit me anyways, Akane?" Ranma thought for a moment, before a large grin appeared on his face. "Let me guess, yer jealous because Ukyou cooks way better than you. No wait, that ain't right… you can't cook so that surely ain't it…"
Akane's fists clenched, but made no attempt to bash the jerk's head. Instead, she opted for folding her arms and turning away in a huff. "Hmph! Fine, I don't care anymore. I'd be more than willing to break the engagement between us so you'll be free to marry either Shampoo or Ukyou. That way, you can have all the delicious ramen and the mouthwatering okonomiyaki that you want!"
"Hey, that's supposed ta be my line! I don't wanna marry you! Heck, I'd rather marry myself before that could ever happen. After all, my girl side is much cuter, sexier, and waaaaaaay more developed than you, an oversized macho chick that can't even kick, and is built like a br-!" The irony of a large brick suddenly being thrown at his face was simply too much.
"Ranma no baka! I wish you'd just disappear from my life!" Akane yelled before rushing up to her room.
"Ara…" Kasumi murmured, eyeing the shocked, not to mention thumped, pigtailed boy in concern.
Nabiki simply had her eyebrows raised. "You don't see a perfect ten on the anger meter often."
"They're getting along well, right Saotome-kun?"
Genma nodded. "Quite right, Tendo-kun."
"Idiots," Nabiki muttered under her breath.
Looking around, Kasumi tilted her head in confusion as a thought occurred to her. "Has anyone seen grandfather Happosai? His dinner is starting to get cold…"
Speaking of which, the perverted Grandmaster of Anything Goes was busy searching for something in his room. Happosai even placed the rest of his collection at the corner of the room just so that he could find what he was looking for. "That impudent boy, I'll show him his place. Now, where is it? I know I have it around here somewhere… Aha!"
He pulled out a small, wooden box out of all the junk gathered around it. A number of steel chains and sealing wards decorated the box, perhaps indicating both the power and the danger it possessed. Easily breaking the chains with his ki-enhanced fists, he ripped off the sealing wards and then eagerly opened it. He carefully peered in. Seeing he was in no immediate danger, he carefully grabbed the content of the box and slowly pulled it out. It was an old, worn-out scroll which emitted a strange dim light.
Happosai opened the scroll and read the contents. Satisfied, he started chuckling to himself. "Heheheh, this is it! This is the one that'll really teach that boy a lesson!" He paused, taking a deep breath. "But first things first… Oh! Sweeto!" he exclaimed as he jumped right into the pile of women's underwear. "Ah, this is heaven."
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A bright flash of lighting and the sudden descent of rain shook Ranma out of his brief nap. Seeing that he was lying on the roof of the Tendo home, he simply closed his eyes and resignedly awaited the change. Odd, this type of freaky and sudden weather only appeared on Thursdays, not Tuesdays. It looked like Kami-sama threw her another curve ball, meaning another battle with Happosai was just around the corner. She shrugged. Just as well. She'd been dying to test her skills on a competent fighter.
She frowned as she recalled what happened earlier at dinner. Okay… maybe she went a little overboard. Her frown deepened when she felt something tugging at her conscience. All right, she deserved the stupid brick! She acted like a jerk and got her face mashed in as a result. There!
She closed her eyes and sighed. "I'll apologize to her first thing in the mornin'. I really don't wanna get blasted by knocking at her window at this time o' the night." Sensing the rain had stopped, the redhead opened her eyes and quirked a small smile. This was probably the only good thing about this kind of sudden rain. She watched, entranced, as the clouds parted to reveal the gently glowing moon and the countless numbers of stars accompanying it. This sight never ceased to amaze her. Simplistic beauty was the term Kasumi used for these things, and she wholeheartedly agreed.
She was shaken out her musings when she heard someone creep up from behind. She shook her head. Feh, just as expected. Flipping back up, she spun and faced her would-be attacker. "Well, well, speak of the devil. I thought that you'd have shriveled up and died by now but I see that you've only shriveled up a little more."
Happosai growled. "Ranma, I'll make you pay for what you did to me!"
Wearing a bored expression, Ranma-chan folded her arms beneath her chest and sighed. "What now, you perverted freak? Don't tell me you're going to apply the moxibustion on me again? If you are then I have to tell you that it ain't gonna be as easy as before."
To her surprise, Happosai simply smirked before pulling out the dimly glowing scroll. "I now have a better way of dealing with you, Ranma my boy." Opening the scroll, the perverted master began chanting something that the pigtailed girl could not quite understand.
"Oh, come on. Not another one of your stupid techniques. What now? Are you gonna split my girl-half again? Or are you making a variation of your Happo Dai-Karin? Hey, you listenin'…?" the pigtailed girl's eyes widened when strange markings appeared out of thin air, right before a huge, circular, black portal formed behind the Grandmaster of Anything Goes.
Ranma-chan had to cover her ears when a thunderous roar literally shook the entire house. Not good. She actually felt the raw power the… thing had just by hearing its howl. She quickly decided that it was best to move to a safer distance, lest she get caught by surprise. Ah, but the surprise came early, as she finally noticed that her body became as stiff as a board, effectively pinning her into place. 'Am I freeziin' up? I'm really scared…? N-No way, I ain't afraid of that freak or anythin' he uses!'
As the chant ended, a pair of gigantic pincers popped out of the swirling portal and quickly slammed into the roof tiles. Not a second later, Ranma-chan's eyes widened when the monster used those pincers to pull itself out of the portal. It was a two-headed, Minotaur-like beast that was almost five times her height. It had three horns on its head, one at the middle and two at its sides. It had four long, heavily muscled arms, and giant crab-like pincers as hands. Lastly, it had large, horse legs and a long, whip-like tail.
Nodding in approval at what he summoned, Happosai turned back to the pigtailed girl and chuckled, "Are you afraid yet, Ranma? This is what you get for treating your master so rudely! Go, my servant! Get him!"
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Ranma-chan snapped out of her daze, forcefully suppressing her fears as she went into the Anything Goes fighting stance. "C-Come on, you old pervert, I ain't afraid o' nothin'!"
Happosai chuckled once more but his intended laughter was cut short when the monster hadn't moved an inch from its position. "What's the matter? I said get him! Attack! Attack! Why you, I said attack…!"
Oh, it attacked alright. It swatted the little gnome with one of its pincers with surprising speed. Said gnome was sent crashing down into the koi pond with a loud splash, knocking him out cold. Having rid itself of the annoying pest, the monster set its eyes on its next target, which was none other than the pigtailed girl.
Ranma-chan was completely caught off-guard by the beast's mobility. Despite its size, it really was quite agile, being able to land a hit on her stomach before she could even notice. She screamed as the beast flung her toward the edge of the roof.
"What's all the racket up there?" Nabiki muttered, looking up at her open window, only to blink in surprise when she saw the screaming pigtailed girl crashing hard to the ground below.
Carrying a sleeping P-chan, Akane walked out of the house, tiredly rubbing her eyes before looking up. The sight of her fiancé eating dirt just a few feet away from her was enough to jolt her completely awake. "Ranma…? What are you doing at this time of the night?"
A roar forced the youngest Tendo to look back up. Akane's eyes widened when she saw the beast standing on top of the house, and it was looking directly at her. Howling once more, the beast jumped down and aimed all four of its pincers at her frozen form.
"Akane!" Ranma-chan yelled, hastily getting back up and doing a mad dash towards her fiancée. She grabbed the still dazed blue-haired girl and quickly leapt out of harms way, mere seconds before the beast delivered its intended attack that formed a sizable crater on the ground.
Grim-faced, Ranma-chan leaped to the far side of the house and gently placed Akane down. "Stay back Akane, it's a lot stronger than anything I've faced so far." Before her fiancée could retort, she grabbed P-chan by his bandana and turned away. In a low whisper, she said, "Ryoga, I need yer help. I don't think I can beat it all alone and I don't know if I can protect Akane and the rest of them by myself."
P-chan begrudgingly nodded and with a grunt, he quickly ran inside the house to look for some warm water to change back. It was up to fate as to whether or not he'd get lost. Another roar from the beast caught Ranma-chan's attention. Ignoring her wounds, she was about to jump back into the fray but Akane held him back by grabbing onto her shirt. "Akane, what are you doing? Let go of me, you uncute tomboy!"
"I'll fight too! I can fight that monster!"
"No you won't!" Ranma-chan shouted in anger, surprising the youngest Tendo. "You ain't fighting that thing! Heck, even I admit that I can't fight that thing all by myself! So stop being so stubborn and go back inside the house!" Not bothering to wait for an angry response, she quickly turned around and jumped towards the beast, successfully punching it several times on its stomach.
Happosai suddenly leapt out of the koi pond, ki-enhanced pipe in hand. With a low growl, he rushed towards the monster and shoved the pipe onto the monster's chest. That attack tossed the monster up and forced the beast to land head first on the roof. "You dare disobey the one that summoned you? You're as bad as Ranma here!"
"Hey!"
"It doesn't matter now. You leave me no choice but to destroy you." Happosai jumped onto the roof, pulled out an already lit firecracker out of his clothes and swung it towards the beast. "Happo Dai-Karin!"
Happosai scratched his head when the monster took the brunt of the attack and acted as if it was just bitten by a small mosquito. Ranma-chan on the other hand, was twitching rather violently at the scene that took place. Scowling, she jumped after the pervert and grabbed him by the shirt. "Idiot! What the heck will a friggin' firecracker do to a monster like that?!"
The two didn't have time to go into their usual childish bickering because a pair of pincers slammed them right into the roof tiles. Happosai easily got out of his current predicament while Ranma-chan was having a difficult time distancing herself because the monster appeared to have taken a liking into beating her up to a bloody pulp.
"Kachuu Tenshin Amaguriken!"
Several hundred more punches connected to the beast's stomach, temporarily stunning the beast. Ranma-chan flipped back, noting that Happosai was a few feet behind the dazed behemoth. As she went into her fighting stance, she yelled, "Old man, read that scroll again and send it back! I'll keep it busy! Hurry! Send it-ugh!"
The redhead received yet another powerful blow to the side of his face, causing her to roll to the far side. She quickly recovered from the blow, but soon fell to her knees and spat out some blood. "Do it now, Happosai!"
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"Master, hurry up please!" Soun, who was now wide-awake as the rest of the household, pleaded from the ground. Panda-Genma wrote something similar on his ever trusty panda sign. /Oh please master! Save my ungrateful boy or else the schools will never be joined!/
"Oh my!"
"Grandfather Happosai!" Akane added, clasping her hands tightly. "Hurry up or else Ranma will…"
Ranma-chan let off yet another gut-wrenching scream when the monster nicked her on the chest, causing her to be hurled all the way back to the other side of the roof. The attack also caused her to spat even more blood.
Casually jumping out of the fray, Happosai looked down at the pleading fathers with a frown. "Hmph, why should I? This ought to teach him a very hard lesson for interfering with an old man's happiness!"
Fortunately, Panda-Genma was quick to respond. /But Master, the schools will never be joined without Ranma! And Ranma-chan will be gone too if that happens to my boy!/
"Ranma-chan will disappear too?" Happosai's eyes widened, gazing back at the bleeding redhead. Ranma-chan will be gone? No! He'd never allow such travesty to happen! "Ranma-chan, I'm coming to save you!" In a blur, he quickly grabbed the scroll that was fortunately left intact under a few roof tiles and began rereading it. "Let's see… portal… portal… I got it!"
"Then quit stalling and just do it already!" Ranma-chan yelled while barely being able to dodge the monster's swift pincers.
Finding the spell he was looking for, Happosai immediately began reciting the passage from the scroll. Soon enough, another swirling black portal appeared behind the monster, but this one was producing a strong vacuum wind that furiously tried to suck the beast in. Ranma-chan nimbly got out of the way, panting in exhaustion right beside the Grandmaster of Anything Goes. "Heh, alright, it's working… nice job old geezer."
"Of course! I had to in order to save you, Ranma-chan!" Happosai said proudly. Ranma-chan braced herself for one of the pervert's patented glomp but the old man surprised her by turning away and throwing the scroll of summoning right at Soun. "Soun! Genma! I want that scroll burned!"
The monster howled, frantically trying to fight the strong winds but it was to no avail. It roared one final time as it was finally sent back into whatever world it came from. Everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief, but it was short-lived, especially for Ranma-chan and Happosai. Their eyes widened in shock when the portal started growing bigger instead of simply dissipating. Its vacuum became much stronger as well, as it started pulling them in with ever growing ease.
"What's going on here, Happosai?"
"I don't know!"
They were soon lifted off their feet but luckily, Ranma-chan managed to grab onto a couple of roof tiles. She quickly pinned them both to the roof for support, silently hoping that it would hold long enough for her to come up with a plan. On the other hand, Happosai latched onto the pigtailed girl's leg, clinging for dear life. It was not to last because a barrage of chains and knives forced the redhead to let go of one of the tiles. Looking up, she saw a familiar, smirking myopic duck on the other end of the roof.
"Mousse, you little…!" Ranma-chan paused, quickly grabbing onto one of the retracting chains. With a smirk, she yelled out, "Help pull us out duck, or else you'll be sucked in too!"
Mousse visibly sweated when he heard those words. He quacked a few times as he tried to pull out both Ranma and Happosai. It was quite a challenging feat, especially when it was a duck trying to pull someone who was several times larger than itself. The myopic duck yanked at the chain as hard as he could, but to the horror of both Ranma-chan and Happosai, the chain suddenly broke, completely severing their last hope in escaping the swirling portal.
"Waaahhhh!"
The two screamed as they were finally sucked into the swirling black portal. Mousse was also in danger of being sucked into it. The myopic duck tried to grab onto something but to no avail, he just covered his eyes with his wings as he was pulled in by the powerful vacuum. Imagine his surprise when the portal winked out of existence just seconds before he could be sucked into it. He sat at the destroyed rooftop, quacking a few times in relief.
No one noticed the duck's lucky break. The Tendo's stood beside the koi pond, utterly frozen in shock at what they saw. Panda-Genma was in an even bigger state of shock. This couldn't be happening. His son always managed to pull through at the end… but now…
With tears forming around her eyes, Akane took a few steps forward while furiously shaking her head in denial. "No… no, no, no, no! Ranma!"
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Cologne and Shampoo arrived just in time to see both Ranma and Happosai get sucked into the portal. Stunned, Shampoo fell to her knees while the Amazon elder's eyes widened in recognition at seeing the black portal. "The Amazon summoning scroll… Happi, what have you done?!"
After a few minutes and a lot of wailing from the two fathers, Cologne snatched the scroll from Soun's hands and read it. "As I thought, the technique Happi used was an old summoning spell."
"Summoning spell?"
The amazon elder felt a migraine coming just by thinking of the predicament Ranma and Happosai got themselves in. "Yes, a summoning spell. It's an old technique used by the Joketsuzoku in the past to help aid them against mortal enemies such as the Musks. The technique calls forth a beast, any kind of beast, from another realm to ours but…"
"But… but what great-grandmother?" Shampoo asked in a shaky voice.
Cologne closed her eyes, feeling a bit drained. "You see, it calls a monster from a vast number of worlds, but there was no way to tell which world they came from and what's worse is that the way of sending them back is…"
"As random as the way you summoned them," a serious looking Nabiki deduced. "So Happosai summoned that thing from another world and the portal he formed to send it back leads to yet another world?"
"Sadly, yes."
The middle Tendo girl massaged her forehead. "Talk about complications… So now what do we do? There has to be some kind of scroll, technique or whatever to bring those two back here. Got any ideas, elder?"
"No, we can't do anything to help them from here. The amazons in the past have tried to bring back those that got sucked into the portals but all of them have failed. I'm afraid it is up to those two to find a way back to our world." 'If they're still alive that is…' Cologne added silently. There was absolutely no saying as to what world they might've ended up in. For all she knew, they could've ended up in a world where people had the power to destroy planets in one blast or even a world where demons were abundant and the only ones who could stop them were a bunch of magical girls in really short skirts. 'Happi would've liked that last one. Take care, son-in-law, wherever you are.'
"Airen…" Shampoo whispered, staring blankly at the place where her beloved vanished.
Meanwhile, Akane had gone white, tears flowing down her face as she remembered her words from earlier. 'My chest hurts so much. Is Ranma gone…? Is he really gone? No, that can't be… I never meant that stupid wish, I never meant it!'
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"U-Uhn…" Ranma-chan groaned as she started to come to. "Aw man, my back and my ribs are killin' me…eh? Wha?"
Sitting up, she froze when a sea of trees greeted her. They were all around her, preventing her from figuring out where she was exactly. Maybe she was just in the forest outskirts of Nerima? She tried to squelch the sense of dread she was feeling, but kami-sama would have none of it. A small creature hopped into view, resembling a white rabbit, only this rabbit had two long fangs as teeth, bloody-red eyes, and was holding a small axe. "What in the heck…?"
Having woken up a short while ago, Happosai studied the creature with a frown. "Hmm… the scroll of summoning must've sent us in another world. Anyway, it seems that we're stuck here Ranma-chan so… let me weep on your chest!"
A seething Ranma-chan hit him on the head, clearly not in the mood to deal with the pervert's antics. "I know Ryoga's going to kill me for this, but somebody has to say it. Damn you, Happosai! This is your fault!"
"How is it that it's the poor, weak old man's fault? If it wasn't for you interfering with an old man's happiness, we wouldn't even be in this mess!"
"If you hadn't been stealing underwear in the first place, I wouldn't have ta get in yer way, ya stupid old freak!" the redhead retorted, grabbing the old gnome by the shirt and shaking him rather violently. "You better have a way to get us back, because I swear…"
Both the pervert and the pigtailed girl froze when a large shadow suddenly loomed over their heads. Before they could even look at the figure towering over them, they got swatted towards one of the large trees. Happosai went head first into the tree, instantly knocking him out. Ranma-chan wasn't too far behind. She was barely conscious, her vision blurry, and she just got the wind knocked out of her. The last thing she saw before passing out was the deadly pincers of the beast she thought they got rid off closing in on her.
The expected explosion of blood was replaced by cackles of lightning bolts, the hissing sound of flame pillars as they burst out of the ground, and the whizzing sound of a large number of shuriken and kunai. All of them were directed towards the beast, completely halting its attack. The beast let loose one more fierce howl before finally turning into dust.
As the flames died down, a group of ninja dropped down from the trees. One of them approached the unconscious redhead. "Tch, she's out of it. Mondo! I think this was a summoning gone awry. They're probably spies from the City-State and that monster was probably summoned by these two to attack us!"
"Calm down, Sasuke. Remember what you've been taught," the man called Mondo said. "Hmm… I think you're right about the failed summoning, but let us not be too hasty about these two. Even if they did turn out to be our enemies, they'd do us more good alive than dead. Don't you agree?"
The ninja called Sasuke scoffed. "Fine. You three ninja! Take these two trespassers away!"
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AN: Not much change from the original. Don't expect major changes until chapter 11, that's where this rewrite really starts to diverge from my original idea.
Next: Shinobi