Disclaimer: I own none of the characters and I'm not making any money off
of this. Star Wars in its entirety belongs to George Lucas and other
companies and people who are not me.
Jaina stood in front of the door to another set of shared quarters. This time she hit the panel that would announce her presence to the room's occupants. She counted slowly and silently to thirty, giving them time. She wasn't actually in their chain of command, but she knew from experience that it had never hurt to tidy up for a senior officer, whoever they were.
As she counted off thirty-one, the door finally snapped open. The blue skinned Chiss woman was standing stiffly almost at attention in front of her bunk. Jaina focused on her first rather than the person that had opened the door. "Lieutenant, would you mind excusing us for a moment?"
It might have been phrased as a question, but there was no doubt that it was a thinly disguised order. The Chiss woman shot a brief glance at her roommate and then apparently finding whatever confirmation that she sought, she scooped up her jacket and datapad, brushing passed Jaina as she exited.
Jaina didn't move until the door had hissed shut. She easily took a seat on the room's one small cramped chair. "What's your name?" She asked quietly.
A frown penetrated the glower on the blonde's face. "You know who I am."
"Are you Wyn or Cem," Jaina clarified.
"Cem." Her answer was spoken grudgingly. Jaina met Cem's eyes. "I have a proposal for you, Cem, one that your brother will most likely kill me for presenting to you."
Cem's expression didn't change. It remained just as hostile as it had been moments before, but she didn't try to kick Jaina out.
"How much do you know about the last time Jag was in the Known Regions?"
"Enough to know that you could have been my sister-in-law one day, if that's what you were asking. At least before Jag came to his senses," Cem added snidely in her brother's defense.
Jaina's smile was patronizing if a bit brittle. "Actually that wasn't what I was asking. I was referring to what the military operations that Jag was involved in, not the heinously stupid mistakes of youth that we made."
"Oh." The girl's righteous rage lost some of its momentum, but she didn't seem any less angry, just temporarily deflated. "Not really."
Jaina nodded, pushing past her annoyance. She understood how Cem was acting. Cem was protecting her brother. Years ago, when her brothers were alive Jaina could remember feeling the same protectiveness for them. "There was a large battle against the Vong on Borealis, shortly after the fall of Coruscant. We were cut off from any reinforcements. Your uncle, Wedge Antilles, was in charge there. Information was being leaked and the government, or what was left of it, was in a state of non-functioning turmoil. To get things done, keep fighting the Vong and save lives, Wedge formed a secret group called the Insiders that worked to get things- thing both military and political- done outside of the government framework. Jag and I, among many others, were in the Insiders."
"So?" The biting tone was back, not that Jaina really cared. It would just make this take longer.
"So I'm asking if you care about putting the piloting skills that you definitely have, if you're half of the pilot that your brother is, to better use than pulling off flashy maneuvers for diplomats who couldn't care less anyway. I'm giving you a chance to do something, to fly for real, to make a difference in the fight against the Yuuzhan Vong, and if you care about that sort of thing- to go down in history as part of one of the craziest, but most brilliant plans that has been executed. This will make the Rebels going up against a fully functional Death Star, look like child's play."
Cem stared at the other woman for a moment, looking almost wide eyed at Jaina. "You're insane."
Jaina only smiled, and somehow that scared Cem even more. "You don't know the half of it."
Cem had regained some of her composure, or at least bravado, and now she met Jaina's gaze. "You hurt my brother, like I've never seen him hurt before. You should pay for that." Her eyes blazed with fury. "I hope you do pay for that," she hesitated and Jaina saw a mixture of emotions flash through her eyes, "but I won't let the loathing that I feel for you keep me from doing my duty. I'm in."
If she had expected a furious reaction from Jaina, she didn't get one. If anything Jaina seemed amused. "The meeting is in the primary conference room at 0820 tomorrow morning. Don't be late." She walked out without a backwards glance at Cem.
===========================================================
To Jaina's relief, Miat was gone when Jaina entered their quarters a little while later. She didn't know if she could handle the pressure of the constant reminder that Miat represented along with everything else. Callista's words had only just begun to sink in for Jaina. Her mind was screaming at her that Callista's words- the idea that her twin brother might still be alive- were all an elaborate trap, designed in a desperate attempt on Callista's part to save her own life.
Jacen had been dead for almost six years, since the aftermath of the Myrkr mission when the Jedi that had been onboard the Trickster had felt his death. Jaina had always written Leia's insistence that her oldest son was still alive off as a mother's wishful thinking or simply denial. After all, there was only so much grief someone, even Leia Organa Solo could deal with.
If Jacen was alive, though, if..... She wondered what it would mean. He would surely be changed from the teenager that she remembered who told bad jokes in an attempt to make Tenel Ka smile, who stood up for what he thought was right, who didn't let anyone else think for him, and who knew her better than anyone else in the Galaxy. He wouldn't know her that well anymore, because she had to have changed just as much as Jacen had in the past six years. That wasn't even considering the fact that he had spent those long years as a Vong prisoner. There was no way to tell how much their indoctrination would have changed him. She didn't even know if he could be trusted anymore. The thought tore at her, adding to the rest of the pain that she was carrying around.
A lone tear trickled down Jaina's cheek, as she sank exhausted onto her bunk. It was times like these, when she was so very tired, both emotionally and physically, that she regretted being alone. It was the only time that she allowed herself to miss Anakin and Jacen, to think about the rest of her scattered family, busy in various places around the galaxy with missions of their own, and to regret what had happened between she and Jag. In her rare moments of crystal clear honesty, she could admit that her breakup with Jag had been mostly an accident. It was simply a misunderstanding of devastating proportions.
Her throat closed around a choked sob. She was overwhelmed by the pain, and unable to escape it. Tonight in Jag's quarters she had been faced with an inescapable reminder of what she had felt for Jag. The possibility that she would have to manipulate Jag's memories had been all too real, and she hadn't been sure if she could actually go through with it or not. She exhaled slowly and then inhaled, drawing the Force to her as she did. Energy poured into her, not the pure clean energy that could bathe a Jedi in peace and calm. She didn't even think she could comprehend how to tap into that power anymore. Instead she focused on her pain, drawing it into her and slowly walling it away deep within her. She replaced it with cold determination.
The past was gone and she had changed irrevocably. She would deal with everything else in the morning.
Please leave a review and let me know what you think of this chapter. :)
Jaina stood in front of the door to another set of shared quarters. This time she hit the panel that would announce her presence to the room's occupants. She counted slowly and silently to thirty, giving them time. She wasn't actually in their chain of command, but she knew from experience that it had never hurt to tidy up for a senior officer, whoever they were.
As she counted off thirty-one, the door finally snapped open. The blue skinned Chiss woman was standing stiffly almost at attention in front of her bunk. Jaina focused on her first rather than the person that had opened the door. "Lieutenant, would you mind excusing us for a moment?"
It might have been phrased as a question, but there was no doubt that it was a thinly disguised order. The Chiss woman shot a brief glance at her roommate and then apparently finding whatever confirmation that she sought, she scooped up her jacket and datapad, brushing passed Jaina as she exited.
Jaina didn't move until the door had hissed shut. She easily took a seat on the room's one small cramped chair. "What's your name?" She asked quietly.
A frown penetrated the glower on the blonde's face. "You know who I am."
"Are you Wyn or Cem," Jaina clarified.
"Cem." Her answer was spoken grudgingly. Jaina met Cem's eyes. "I have a proposal for you, Cem, one that your brother will most likely kill me for presenting to you."
Cem's expression didn't change. It remained just as hostile as it had been moments before, but she didn't try to kick Jaina out.
"How much do you know about the last time Jag was in the Known Regions?"
"Enough to know that you could have been my sister-in-law one day, if that's what you were asking. At least before Jag came to his senses," Cem added snidely in her brother's defense.
Jaina's smile was patronizing if a bit brittle. "Actually that wasn't what I was asking. I was referring to what the military operations that Jag was involved in, not the heinously stupid mistakes of youth that we made."
"Oh." The girl's righteous rage lost some of its momentum, but she didn't seem any less angry, just temporarily deflated. "Not really."
Jaina nodded, pushing past her annoyance. She understood how Cem was acting. Cem was protecting her brother. Years ago, when her brothers were alive Jaina could remember feeling the same protectiveness for them. "There was a large battle against the Vong on Borealis, shortly after the fall of Coruscant. We were cut off from any reinforcements. Your uncle, Wedge Antilles, was in charge there. Information was being leaked and the government, or what was left of it, was in a state of non-functioning turmoil. To get things done, keep fighting the Vong and save lives, Wedge formed a secret group called the Insiders that worked to get things- thing both military and political- done outside of the government framework. Jag and I, among many others, were in the Insiders."
"So?" The biting tone was back, not that Jaina really cared. It would just make this take longer.
"So I'm asking if you care about putting the piloting skills that you definitely have, if you're half of the pilot that your brother is, to better use than pulling off flashy maneuvers for diplomats who couldn't care less anyway. I'm giving you a chance to do something, to fly for real, to make a difference in the fight against the Yuuzhan Vong, and if you care about that sort of thing- to go down in history as part of one of the craziest, but most brilliant plans that has been executed. This will make the Rebels going up against a fully functional Death Star, look like child's play."
Cem stared at the other woman for a moment, looking almost wide eyed at Jaina. "You're insane."
Jaina only smiled, and somehow that scared Cem even more. "You don't know the half of it."
Cem had regained some of her composure, or at least bravado, and now she met Jaina's gaze. "You hurt my brother, like I've never seen him hurt before. You should pay for that." Her eyes blazed with fury. "I hope you do pay for that," she hesitated and Jaina saw a mixture of emotions flash through her eyes, "but I won't let the loathing that I feel for you keep me from doing my duty. I'm in."
If she had expected a furious reaction from Jaina, she didn't get one. If anything Jaina seemed amused. "The meeting is in the primary conference room at 0820 tomorrow morning. Don't be late." She walked out without a backwards glance at Cem.
===========================================================
To Jaina's relief, Miat was gone when Jaina entered their quarters a little while later. She didn't know if she could handle the pressure of the constant reminder that Miat represented along with everything else. Callista's words had only just begun to sink in for Jaina. Her mind was screaming at her that Callista's words- the idea that her twin brother might still be alive- were all an elaborate trap, designed in a desperate attempt on Callista's part to save her own life.
Jacen had been dead for almost six years, since the aftermath of the Myrkr mission when the Jedi that had been onboard the Trickster had felt his death. Jaina had always written Leia's insistence that her oldest son was still alive off as a mother's wishful thinking or simply denial. After all, there was only so much grief someone, even Leia Organa Solo could deal with.
If Jacen was alive, though, if..... She wondered what it would mean. He would surely be changed from the teenager that she remembered who told bad jokes in an attempt to make Tenel Ka smile, who stood up for what he thought was right, who didn't let anyone else think for him, and who knew her better than anyone else in the Galaxy. He wouldn't know her that well anymore, because she had to have changed just as much as Jacen had in the past six years. That wasn't even considering the fact that he had spent those long years as a Vong prisoner. There was no way to tell how much their indoctrination would have changed him. She didn't even know if he could be trusted anymore. The thought tore at her, adding to the rest of the pain that she was carrying around.
A lone tear trickled down Jaina's cheek, as she sank exhausted onto her bunk. It was times like these, when she was so very tired, both emotionally and physically, that she regretted being alone. It was the only time that she allowed herself to miss Anakin and Jacen, to think about the rest of her scattered family, busy in various places around the galaxy with missions of their own, and to regret what had happened between she and Jag. In her rare moments of crystal clear honesty, she could admit that her breakup with Jag had been mostly an accident. It was simply a misunderstanding of devastating proportions.
Her throat closed around a choked sob. She was overwhelmed by the pain, and unable to escape it. Tonight in Jag's quarters she had been faced with an inescapable reminder of what she had felt for Jag. The possibility that she would have to manipulate Jag's memories had been all too real, and she hadn't been sure if she could actually go through with it or not. She exhaled slowly and then inhaled, drawing the Force to her as she did. Energy poured into her, not the pure clean energy that could bathe a Jedi in peace and calm. She didn't even think she could comprehend how to tap into that power anymore. Instead she focused on her pain, drawing it into her and slowly walling it away deep within her. She replaced it with cold determination.
The past was gone and she had changed irrevocably. She would deal with everything else in the morning.
Please leave a review and let me know what you think of this chapter. :)