Disclaimer: I don't own Newsies or any other media references I may make throughout the duration of this fic.

Chapter 13: Trees Ruin Everything

Spot

My brother's still here. We stayed up most of the night talking about the tree. We understand each other in a way. He sees the maple in the same way as I do. It's majestic and regal. It's humbling, I like the feeling that it gives me, like my problems aren't so huge as I thought them to be.

How can a tree do that?

Dutchy left early this morning to find somewhere that'd sell him a cheap book on Buddhism and probably find a guy with some marijuana.

So all alone in the dorm were Racetrack and I.

"What do you think about the tree?" I asked him, even though I'd asked him before.

"It's nice," he said, but in a very unconvincing tone.

"Really, I want to know what you think about it. In your words. What do you think about it?"

"Honestly?" he looked up from the paper at me.

I nodded.

He looked out the window to the tree, which was now more beautiful than ever because it was covered in a thin layer of frost.

"It's the ugliest thing I've ever seen."

Racetrack

His face fell.

"Are you serious?"

What was the big deal? It was just a tree; an ancient, beat up, disgusting tree.

I nod meekly, now regretting telling him that it was ugly.

"How can you say that? Do you really think that? Look at it!" he demanded. "Look at it properly. Can you see it?"

"Spot, the damn thing is covered in bird crap and it's falling apart. The bark's peeling off and the branches are falling off. It's not even nice to look at. On any level."

Spot looked at me for a long time after I said this.

I got up and shut the window for the first time all term. "I have to get to work."

"We need a break," he told me as I turned.

I didn't have anything to say to that so I kept walking. How can everything be ruined by just a stupid tree?

(Three and a half years later)

Love is a fragile thing. It you're not careful it will fall of the table and break on the floor like glass. You need to constantly keep it cushioned in the ribcage that is your chest.

After that day in my fist year of university I've managed to pick up most of the pieces and fit them together. Slowly, with the help of friends, I swallowed it down so it now sits in my chest again, intact, but ready to be broken.

Cherish has been my best friend the last three and a half years and Bumlets has helped me through it. I didn't know he liked me, he told me two weeks after I moved out of my dorm room. He's the sweetest guy I've ever met, he understands everything I say and never rushed me to anything. I asked him out.

So life seems to be going well for me, but something inside reminds me of the passion I felt for Spot. It's the kind of thing I haven't felt for anyone else, not even Bumlets, even though I'm sure I love him.

In a week I'm graduating from Advanced Calculus with Bumlets, who is graduating Valedictorian. His mother's really happy for him and she's really happy for us.

None of my family is coming down to see me, but that doesn't surprise me. I wasn't anticipating it anyways. Another thing I wasn't anticipating was Spot coming, but I still wish he would.

I see him sometimes, hurrying to class. I doubt he notices me. Cherish has stayed in touch with him and says he still asks about me every now and then. She says she tells him I'm fine.

"He asked me again about you today," she told me earlier this morning.

"How's he?" I ask.

She shrugs and tells me he has a new boyfriend. Another one. Maybe it wasn't my fault, maybe Spot just can't settle down.

Spot

The tree was cut down in my third year here.

"It's a hazard," a city worker told me. "It's over a hundred years old, it'll fall down any time and might fall onto someone or onto a building."

So Racetrack was right, it was going to fall down any second.

Cherish tells me he's fine and that now he's going out with his friend Bumlets, the first one to know about Racetrack and I in first year.

I wish I could see him, I still wish things worked out. No one I've ever met compares to Racetrack. It's the way he makes me feel and now I hold everyone to that standard. Racetrack and I had love. I can't seem to find that again. It was so easy for us and now everything else is so hard.

I know he's graduating from Advanced Calculus next week, and I wish I could go. I don't think he wants me though. He'll probably become an accountant.

After I graduate from World History I'm going to teaching college. I never though I'd be a teacher, I was always one of those kids that teachers hated. I guess that means I'll know all the tricks.

So we're both getting behind the desk jobs.

"If you make a difference in somebody's life for the better you're very lucky," Dutchy told me after Racetrack and I broke up.

Racetrack has changed mine, he taught me what love feels like.

I was in the library when I saw him tonight, at around eleven o'clock.

"Can I sit here?" I asked.

He didn't even look up, but nodded anyways.

I sat down. "Remember me?" I queried.

He jerked his head up at me. I look of surprise shot over his face. "Oh, Spot hi."

End Chapter

((I hope that wasn't weird, seeing as I skipped over so many years and all. Did you miss me and this fiction? I think it's coming to an end soon, please review!))

Shoutouts:

Strawberri Shake- sorry, this went almost the opposite direction that you thought…we didn't go out on new Years, it rained a lot and my dad laughed at people caught in the rain from the hotel. We were at Disney for Independence Day and it was very hectic.

C.M. Higgins- hurried as fast as I could. Hope you like it!

Coin- oops. Sorry. Don't hate me for what I've done to the boys!

Madison Square- I'm sleepy too, I woke up at almost noon today…