DISCLAIMER: The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-1, the goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of the people who made them up. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.
Living With The Past
Part two
'You should have brought him straight to the infirmary, Colonel,' Dr Fraiser snapped at Jack once she'd checked Daniel and patched him up.
'I tried that but he insisted on being brought home,' Jack tried to explain.
'Colonel…' Janet said in warning tones.
'Look, we were nearly there but when he realised where we were going he tried to get out of the car while it was still moving, so I figured it would be better just to do as he wanted,' Jack said. 'He really didn't want to go to the infirmary, doc. I'm sure it's nothing personal but we all know how Danny feels about the place.'
'Hmm.' Janet looked slightly mollified, but still concerned as to what would make Daniel act irrationally. 'Any idea what's going on?'
'He's been behaving like this since we got back from '989,' Jack said, trying to recall what had actually happened. 'Carter and Teal'c weren't affected, but Daniel and I had to relive some painful memories…' Jack's voice faded as it finally sunk in what was affecting his friend. 'I had to go through different scenarios on a mission that went bad - it was kind of - disturbing.' Jack was not going to admit the problems he'd had trying to push the incident to the back of his mind where it had been for years.
'I watched my parents die again,' a quiet voice behind them spoke up. They'd thought Daniel was asleep.
'But…' Jack began, trying to understand how something so far in the past, when he was so young and probably could barely remember his parents, could have affected him.
'I watched as they were crushed to death by the cover stone of a display they were putting up in the New York Museum of Art.' Daniel's voice was barely a whisper now.
'Daniel, I…' Jack began as he stepped back into the room.
'Jack, just leave me alone. I'm tired.' Daniel rolled over and curled himself up into a ball, trying to shut out the rest of the world.
Jack moved towards him but found a hand laid on his arm, restraining him. 'He's in no fit state to get himself worked up just now. He's got a pretty nasty concussion and needs time to feel physically better before he can begin to face up to this.' Jack hesitated, knowing Dr Fraiser was right but unwilling to leave Daniel like this. 'Come on sir, the least you can do is offer me a cup of coffee for having to come all the way out here.' Janet smiled at him and Jack backed down, following her back to the kitchen where he set about making coffee.
'So…' Janet began once they were sitting down with their coffee. 'How come none of this came up during your post-mission exam?' Her tone was deceptively mild, but Jack knew the steel that was underlying the innocent sounding question.
'I guess I'd put it behind me and I had no idea what Daniel had been through, there really didn't seem to be any need to mention it,' Jack tried to sound convincing.
'When will I ever get it through to you people that I need to know about everything that might affect your health during the post-mission checks?' Janet fumed. It happened way too often that someone would conveniently forget to mention something that later had an adverse affect. 'How am I supposed to keep you all fit and active if you conceal things?'
'Doc, I'm sorry ok, it just didn't seem important at the time.' Jack sounded very sorry for himself - but then, Dr Fraiser had been known to reduce the General to a similar state when she felt he was trying to get people back into the field too soon after a rough mission.
'Just try to remember, Colonel, that I need to know everything if I'm to help you and keep you up and running.' Janet calmed down having had her say and ready to tackle the problem of Daniel. 'What about Daniel?'
'I had no idea he'd witnessed his parents' deaths. I knew how they died and that Daniel was very young when it happened, but to actually see it…' Jack fell silent for a moment, trying to envisage the affect that this could have on someone, and more surprisingly, how that someone had turned out so well. 'The Gamekeeper made us believe we could change the outcome of what had happened in our past. Daniel must have tried so hard to stop the accident from happening, and each time to have to go back to the beginning when he failed…'
'I know, Colonel. It just doesn't bear thinking about.' Janet sympathised, draining the last of her coffee. 'Unfortunately, Daniel has been forced to think about it again and he needs to learn to deal with it, as he must have done over the years after it happened. At least this time he has friends there for him, unlike before when he ended up in foster care with no one around to really help him through it.'
'I'll do my best, but I really don't know…' Jack looked doubtful as he realised the scope of the task ahead of him. The two men were complete opposites to each other, but somehow had developed a strong sense of friendship, something that had been missing from both their lives before they were thrown together, but he wasn't sure he had what was needed to get the younger man back on track. Jack tended to file his feelings to a remote part of his brain, never to see the light of day again, whereas Daniel would hold on to his pain and relive it, trying to make sense of what had happened. Ultimately Daniel would come through it, but Jack wasn't sure how long it would take or how much damage would be caused on the way.
'I'll leave you to it, Colonel,' Dr Fraiser stood up, returning her mug to the kitchen. 'Make sure you wake him every hour for the first couple of hours, after that, providing everything is normal, you can let him sleep until morning. Oh, and Colonel,' she added almost as an afterthought, 'no coffee, no junk food and no reading.'
'Doc - you're a sadist.' Jack spoke more lightly now. 'Daniel with no coffee, cookies or books? You think I'm a martyr or something?'
'I'll stop by in the morning to see how he's doing,' Janet ignored Jack's complaining and took her leave, hoping that somehow everyone's favourite archaeologist would pull through this latest in the long list of tragedies he'd been faced with in his life.
XOXOXOX
'Gerroff!' Daniel mumbled, swiping at Jack's hand which was on his shoulder.
'Come on Daniel, you know the rules,' Jack replied, keeping his tone light. Daniel looked so vulnerable lying there with his head bandaged up, a haunted expression on his face.
'Don't care. Go 'way,' Daniel pulled the pillow over his face and rolled away from his tormentor, only to feel Jack pulling him over on to his back and the pillow being removed.
'We can do this the easy way or the hard way, Daniel,' Jack said firmly. 'You know what has to be done, now open your eyes. You really don't want me to make you do you?'
Daniel, with a big sigh, opened his eyes at last, stared sullenly at Jack until he received a nod, then closed his eyes again, ignoring Jack's 'See you in an hour.'
Jack remained beside Daniel for a moment, reluctant to leave him on his own, seeing the pain and hurt that overshadowed his face and which he had seen clearly seen in his eyes.
An hour later, Daniel was a little more co-operative, opening his eyes as requested but saying nothing at all, snapping his eyes closed as soon as he saw Jack was satisfied. Jack checked twice more after this and decided that as Daniel seemed to be recovering well, he would leave him to sleep, just keeping an eye on him now and again.
XOXOXOX
Jack sat upright in the bed in the spare room instantly awake, his senses trying to figure out what had woken him, his instinct telling him it was Daniel.
Pulling on a sweater against the coolness of the night, he padded softly into Daniel's bedroom, snapping on the light when he realised the room was empty. The bedclothes were twisted up and half on the floor, evidence that Daniel had had a restless night and had tossed them to one side in irritation. Jack made his way to the lounge where he stood watching for a few moments before moving closer to the couch.
Daniel was sitting with his knees drawn up to his chest, one arm hugging his legs, the other holding the TV remote with which he was channel surfing until eventually he found something which he settled on. He put the remote beside him and his other arm joined the first in grasping his legs where he sat rocking himself gently as his eyes focussed on the programme he'd selected.
'Star Trek, Daniel?' Jack asked quietly as he moved to sit down next to Daniel. 'Thought you said sci-fi shows were all trash.'
Daniel glanced briefly at Jack, his eyes dull and lifeless, then he returned to the TV, to all appearances absorbed in what was taking place on the screen.
'Hey, I know this episode,' Jack said brightly. 'Isn't this the one where they're trying to get home from some distant part of the galaxy.' Nothing, not even a glance or a raised eyebrow.
Jack sat there allowing the show to play to its conclusion before removing the remote from Daniel's reach and switching the TV off.
'Daniel.' Jack spoke, trying to reach the younger man who sat there staring in front of him which confirmed Jack's suspicion that Daniel hadn't been watching at all. 'Wanna talk?'
This got a response. Daniel lowered his legs and turned to glare at Jack.
'No I don't,' he snapped. 'I just want some space in my own home, but it seems that isn't allowed any more.' Daniel stood up abruptly and took a couple of steps when he was overcome by a wave of dizziness causing him to grab the back of the couch for support. Jack was at his side, holding him steady until the episode passed, only to find his hold shrugged off with an 'I'm fine now.' And with that, Daniel retreated to his bedroom, closing the door firmly behind him.
Jack sighed and returned to the spare room and his disturbed sleep, determined to get to the bottom of this if it was the last thing he did.