Taz: I'm going to warn you in advance....IT'S ALL JO'S FAULT! SHE MADE ME DO IT!"
Jo: You are my bitch, therefore you will do as I say!
Taz: gulp Yes Mistress!!
"Swing This Way." Kai replied nonchalantly, missing Taz's amused snicker of "swing which way?".
Rei looked around nervously. "I swear if one guy pinches my ass I'm outta here!"
"How'd you know some of the girls that pinch your ass aren't guys?" Tyson raised an eyebrow.
"Oh jeez!" Rei groaned.
"Spoilsport!" Taz pouted before turning to Max. "Wanna dance?"
Max blushed furiously but accepted Taz's outstretched hand.
Jo watched them go and rubbed her hands together gleefully. "Perrrrrrfect!"
After he finished goggling at Taz's outfit, Rei caught the gesture out of the corner of his eye.
What's she up to?
"Hey mate! Do us a favour?"
Kai raised an eyebrow and turned his head to face the wiry looking man.
"We need people for tonight's karaoke contest."
"Forget it pal!" Kai snarled turning back to his drink, unaware that Tyson was hiding under the bar snickering.
"Hey dude, wait up!"
The organiser turned around warily.
"My friend's had a change of heart, sign him up!" Tyson beamed.
"Wow! Thanks!" The man brightened up visibly. "You have no idea how much you've just saved my ass! Is there anything I can do to thank you?"
Tyson paused, then grinned evilly. "As a matter of fact there is."
The man looked at him expectantly.
"Sign me up too, with a partner of my choice." Tyson let his eyes wander to where Taz was attempting to teach Max the Macarena.
"Ladies, Gentlemen, and of course Lady-boys! May I have you're attention!" The organiser winced as interference from the mike blasted his eardrums. "The contest is about to begin, the first entrants are Tyson and Taz singing "Man! I Feel Like A Woman!" (A.N: Me and Jo love this song!)
"What the fu..."
"Just shut up and sing!" Tyson clapped a hand over her mouth and snatched her away from Max.
Max blinked for a few moments then sagged his shoulders.
"What's the matter Maxie?" Rei smirked. "You like her or somethin'?"
"It's not that," Max sighed desolately. "I was just beginning to get the hang of that Macarena thing!"
Rei sweat dropped, then shuffled over to sit next to Jo.
Tyson grinned stupidly as Taz folded her arms and shot ninety-mile-an- hour death glares at him across the stage.
Fine! Have it your way, but I'm not going to make this easy for you!
Taz smirked and she deliberately missed the cue.
The organizer wiped his forehead worriedly but restarted the song anyway.
Tyson was just about to start the opening lyrics when Taz stepped in front and interrupted him.
"I'm going out tonight, I'm feelin' alright, I'm gonna let it all hang out. Wanna make some noise, really raise my voice, yeah I wanna scream and shout. No inhibitions, make no conditions, get a little outta line..."
"Go on Taz! Show 'em how it's done!" Jo jumped up and down whooping loudly.
"...Oh, oh, oh, it's only crazy, forget I'm a lady. Men's shirts, short skirts, oh, oh, oh, being real wild yeah. Doing it in style, oh, oh, oh, giving the action, feel the attraction. Cover my hair, do what I dare, oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free yeah. To feel the way I feel..."
Taz paused and pulled Tyson to her side, and they both waited...
"MAN! I FEEL LIKE A WOMAN!"
The crowed erupted into applause.
Jo was still jumping up and down, though now between laughing and crying.
Rei gawped.
Max was still annoyed at his dancing lesson being cut short.
Kenny was recording the whole thing on Dizzy.
Suddenly, the sounds of Taz screaming split through the noise.
Jo instantly jumped up, looking anxiously towards the stage.
What the hell is he doing up there?
Kai stood, towering above Taz and Tyson - who were in a heap on the floor - swaying unsteadily.
"Now I'll show you how it's done." His eyes looked bloodshot and his voice slurred.
Taz groaned and tried to pull herself up, not getting very far because Tyson was sat on her back.
"I'm not your pony! Get the hell off me!" She yelled, flinging him off her back, and crawling over to the table where Jo was sat.
"Before you say anything," She panted, "I think he's pissed!"
"No shit Sherlock!" Jo responded, death glaring when a blonde wolf whistled at him.
Kai closed his eyes and clung to the mike stand for support as the beginning of "Feed My Frankenstein" blasted through the speakers.
(A.N: Another classic!)
"Uh-oh!" Taz groaned.
"Well I aint evil, I'm just good lookin' Start a little fire, and baby start cookin, I'm a hungry man, but I don't want pizza, I'll blow down your house, and then I'm gonna eatcha!"
Kai caught sight of Jo and Taz sitting at a table near the edge of the dance floor.
He grinned evilly and started walking towards them, swaying his hips suggestively, bringing a delighted grin to Jo's face, and a look of pure horror to Taz's.
"Bring you to a simmer, right on time, Rub my greasy fingers up your...greasy spine!"
He reached the table and paused.
Which one first...
He stood in front of Taz and looked down expectantly. (A.N: Jo MADE me do this!)
Taz – not daring to look in any direction let alone up – sat shaking in her seat.
Finally, Kai lost his patience; he grabbed her hands and placed them firmly at her sides, while also plonking himself onto her lap, earning a shocked grunt from his victim, followed by an uncomfortable looking grimace.
"Come to daddy!" He slurred, clutching at her chest before she could protest.
"FUCK ME!" Taz yelped , her eyes wide open in shock.
"Is that an invitation?" Kai leered, his eyes running lazily over her cleavage.
"EEEEEEEEEP!" Taz jumped up so fast that Kai was knocked to the floor, and forced to watch disappointedly as she disappeared into the crowd.
"Aww, never mind cutie," Jo crooned, holding out a hand to pull him up. "I'll look after you!"
Kai grabbed at her hand eagerly, not hearing her wrist crack as he arched his back while pulling himself up to sit on her lap.
"Hey! Where'd you come from!" Rei shrieked as Taz's head poked out from between his legs.
"Under the table behind you!" Taz hissed.
"Why are you whispering?" Rei hissed back.
"I just got groped by the ice prince and I've been nominated for karaoke queen by Tyson; you think I'm gonna be shouting from tree tops?!" Taz almost shrieked herself.
"Screaming blue murder more like!" Rei muttered, choking on a crisp as Taz immediately swung her head upwards, the back of her skull connecting with... "YEEEEOOOOOW!"
Kai's head swivelled as he heard the pained yell, but was forced back to face Jo as she grabbed his chin.
"You really shouldn't scare my friend, she has delicate nerves." Jo smirked.
Kai said nothing, but pulled his best puppy eyed look – complete with bloodshot eyes!
Jo's left eye twitched momentarily, then she put her arms behind her head and leaned back lazily. "Fine, just give it to me baby!"
At that instant Tyson appeared at their side with a Polaroid camera.
"Share the moment, share life?" He raised an eyebrow at Jo questioningly.
Jo pulled Kai's face down so they were cheek to cheek.
Tyson immediately started clicking the camera repeatedly. "Yes! Perfect! Work it baby! The camera loves you!"
"Where are you going?" Max looked up to see Tyson grinning as he turned away.
At that moment "Hey Ya!" Blasted into his eardrums.
"I'm gonna go shake it like a Polaroid picture with Taz!"
"Not if I shake it first!" Having had his fair share of alcapops, Max was not only high on sugar but feeling distinctly goofy.
While all this was happening no-one had noticed Rei – still holding his groin and wincing in pain – sneak over to the coat rack, and raid Jo's bag.
"Well what have we here?" He smirked, unfolding the crisp white paper.
His sharp amber eyes scanned the letter briefly, his eyebrows rising, and eyes bulging by the second.
"Holy smokes!"Taz: If you liked it or even if you were just plain freaked out (like me) still give us some much appreciated feedback (note: flamers will be mocked)
Jo: And chewed up and spat out!