This is my first attempt at fanfic, ever. Please read and review. I really appreciate all the feedback, and I love that people are liking my story. It means a lot. And thanks to amani, my awesome beta, and to David and farfalina. And to you guys at TWoP and OTB. I love you kids!

Ah, the disclaimer: I don't own anything. I don't even own a car. I have a dog, but she kinda owns me, and I doubt you'd want her anyway, so no suing. I'm just a girl who loves the HoYay!

Also, if you'll note, in the summary line it mentions that it's Seth/Ryan slash. So, if that's not your thing, don't read it. No worries.

I dream that someday we'll be able to
Look back on this together and say
It was for the best and that it made us
Stronger today, stronger today
-----

And I don't know where this will lead
But in my life you need to be
Cause I need to say, "Hello again"

--"Hello Again" Hoobastank

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Shit.

Seth's eyes flew open at the sound of his mother's voice. He pulled away from Ryan, whose own eyes were wide with shock and fear. He stepped back, away from Ryan, tripped over his own feet, and hit the ground with a thud. "OW! Damn it, three times in one afternoon. Has to be a record."

Another knock. "Guys? The door's locked, and you really need to start getting ready. We have some stuff to go over before you leave." Kirsten's voice was maternally persistent.

Ryan finally regained the ability to move and stepped over Seth, moving towards the door with large, quick steps. He opened the door to find Kirsten and Sandy waiting outside. "Sorry. Uh, Seth was, uh, teaching me to dance." Ryan started blushing. Damn it. He saw Kirsten and Sandy exchange amused glances. Ryan turned to walk away from the door and saw that Seth was nowhere to be seen. He heard water running in the bathroom and marveled at how quickly Seth could move. Crossing the room, he sat down on the bed, looking up at Sandy and Kirsten. "What's up?"

Kirsten walked over and sat on the couch. "We'll wait till Seth gets out of the bathroom. We just want to make sure you guys know the rules about tonight." She looked up at Sandy and smiled.

"So, Seth was showing you how to dance?" There was a slight hint of mocking in Sandy's voice, and Ryan couldn't tell if he or Seth was the recipient. Ryan smiled slightly, and Sandy could tell Ryan was still embarrassed. His ears burned red. "Yeah. I, uh, didn't dance much before I came here." "Understandable. So, do you feel prepared for tonight?"

"Dad, are you doubting my ability to teach Ryan how to dance?" Seth's voice was joking, and Ryan could see no hints of the fear and shock that had clouded them earlier.

"Not at all, son, not at all. I'm sure you were perfectly Henry Higgins. Now, however, we need to lay down some ground rules for tonight."

Seth groaned and sat down on the bed next to Ryan, careful not to let their legs touch. Ryan noticed that Seth was careful to keep a safe distance, and was silently thankful. "Dad, It's prom. It's the night for which the phrase 'breaking the rules' was invented."

"Seth." Kirsten's tone was warning, but also mildly amused. "As your father was saying before he was interrupted, there are some rules for tonight. No drinking. If you drink, aside from knowing that we will kill you, you must NOT drive. Call a cab, or call one of us. No fighting. No getting arrested. Curfew is 2:00. One minute later, and you're both on restriction until graduation. Understood?" Kirsten looked both boys in the eyes.

"Understood." Ryan mumbled. Seth nodded. "No worries, Mom. We promise we'll be on better than our best behavior. No drunken parties, no motel rooms, no trouble. Honest." Seth stood up and put his arm around his mother's shoulders. "Now, if you'll all excuse me, I need to get ready. Despite my effortless appearance, it takes a lot to be this amazingly handsome." Seth turned and walked out of the poolhouse, not once looking back.

Sandy and Kirsten headed towards the door. "We'll leave you alone to make yourself beautiful. Have a great night, son." Sandy said, smiling as he wrapped his arm around Kirsten's waist and led her out of the poolhouse. "And make sure you guys come back here after picking up the girls next door so Kirsten can take pictures." Sandy and Kirsten walked out of the door and Ryan closed it behind them, Sandy's words resonating in his skull. "Son." God, what the hell was going on? Ryan leaned against the door and slid down to the floor. What had he done? He had betrayed the Cohen's trust and Seth couldn't even look at him. He'd lost his best friend, the first real friend he'd ever had. He banged his head against the door and closed his eyes tightly.

It had taken Seth only a minute to run into the house, up the stairs, and to his room. He closed the door behind himself and leaned against it, eyes closed. What in the hell had he done? He had screwed up before, but this was…this was…there were no words for what this was. He had kissed Ryan. He had kissed his best friend. His almost-brother. Seth did his best to control the wave of tears that lingered threateningly. He had to calm down. Just make it through tonight, he thought, and you can throw yourself on Ryan's mercy tomorrow. Surely this couldn't be the end. Seth walked over to his closet, took out his tux, laid it carefully on the bed, and headed to the bathroom for a quick shower. He just had to make it through Prom.

Prom. Ryan opened his eyes. He didn't know how long he had been sitting against the door. He had to get ready. They were supposed to meet the girls at Summer's in less than an hour. He jumped up, gathered some clean boxers and a towel, and went to grab a quick shower. As he was toweling off his hair, he heard Seth's voice. "Ryan?" Damn it. He was stuck in the bathroom, in his boxers, and his tux was laying on the bed, out in his room, where Seth was. Looking around, he saw the robe that Kirsten had gotten him when he first moved in, hanging from a hook on the back of the bathroom door, never worn. He grabbed it and wrapped it around himself tightly before leaving the bathroom.

Seth was standing next to Ryan's bed, wearing his tuxedo and carrying a small corsage. He had been standing there for a few minutes, but when he heard Ryan turn off the shower, he thought he should make his presence known before an embarrassing incident. He had been staring at Ryan's tux, trying to stop himself from picturing what Ryan would look like wearing it. Seth walked around the room, picking up a few of Ryan's CDs mindlessly. It seemed so long ago that this was nothing more than the poolhouse. Since Ryan had come to live with them, everything had changed. He had been so happy that Ryan was staying with them. He was still happy. Seth's eyes saddened as the realization that he had probably ruined all of that hit him. Ryan couldn't even look at him earlier, and his heart sank as he thought about the possibility that Ryan might never speak to him again. He looked up as Ryan came into the room.

Ryan's hair was wet and tousled, and he was wearing the robe Kirsten had bought him almost a year ago. "Hey, the hair is great, but this thing is kinda fancy. You might want to reconsider the robe." He waited, searching Ryan's face for a response, and when a small smile started at the corners of Ryan's mouth, he breathed a heavy sigh of relief. "Funny." Ryan crossed the room to where his tux lay on the bed. Seth made no move to leave. "Uh, Seth, do you mind? I need to get dressed." Seth moved a little closer to Ryan. "Actually, uh, I kinda wanted to talk—" Seth looked up, but the pained look in Ryan's eyes made him stop mid-sentence. He couldn't do this. Not right now. There would be time, later, to talk…if Ryan wanted.

"Yeah, no, sorry. I'll just wait for you outside."

Ryan watched Seth as he walked out of the poolhouse. He couldn't help but notice how handsome Seth looked. Ryan smiled. Seth had made a joke. That was a good sign, right? Still, he couldn't shake the feeling that everything was different now, that once again, he had ruined everything by not thinking. Ryan dressed carefully but quickly. He grabbed his boutonniere and Marissa's corsage out of the minifridge and walked out the door.

Seth was standing by the pool, seemingly deep in thought. Ryan smiled to himself as the many things that Seth could possibly be thinking about flooded his mind. Seth's brain had no "off" switch. Ryan watched the reflection of light from the pool dance across Seth's body for a moment before shaking his head and walking towards him. He noticed that Seth had already put on his boutonniere, and decided he should probably do the same. He set the corsage down on one of the chairs and tried to pin the small white rose to his jacket, but after poking himself the third time, he gave up. "Shit."

"Do you want some help with that?" Seth walked over and stood in front of Ryan. There was something in Seth's voice that Ryan couldn't place, but he decided to worry about it later. Just get through tonight, right? Seth took the flower from Ryan and moved to pin it to his lapel. No. Seth would be too close. Ryan stepped back, putting distance between his lips and Seth's. That was the safest thing. Distance. Because as much as Ryan would like to convince himself that what had happened earlier was some strange fluke, he couldn't deny how much he wanted to kiss Seth again, not with him standing so close and breathing so heavily. He grabbed the boutonniere and took another step back. "It's okay, Marissa can do it for me."

Seth's shoulders fell. Not a good sign. Ryan wouldn't let Seth get within five feet of him without moving back, putting more distance between them. It had just been an innocent offer to help. He hadn't meant anything by it. Then again, the same could be said for the dancing lessons, and look how that had ended. But still, the distance scared him. As did the weird feeling he got in the pit of his stomach when Ryan said Marissa's name. He knew that this was another "on again" moment in their lengthy "on again/off again" relationship, a pattern that had started after the incident last year with Oliver and the gun. Seth wasn't exactly sure how "on" they were this time, but he had known better than to ask Ryan. Ryan wasn't much of a talker, but any mention of the precarious nature of his relationship with Marissa and he shut down for a while. And what should it matter to Seth anyway? He was going to Prom with Summer Roberts. It was one of his long time dreams coming true. As he reviewed his brief history with her--the dating Summer, the losing Summer, the getting Summer back--he was still amazed that he was on his way to pick her up for Prom. And yet, somewhere on the edge of Seth's mind, he couldn't brush the feeling of Ryan's lips from his own. He reached up with his hand to try one more time, and looked at Ryan.

Seth's eyes met Ryan's and he exhaled slowly. "Ryan—" Seth began, but Ryan cut him off. "Are you ready to go?" Ryan asked, his eyes expressionless. Seth furrowed his brow. "Yeah, let's go. I don't want to be late. We've gone three months without a rage blackout. Wouldn't want to mar that streak."

Ryan ignored the weird feeling he got when he thought about Seth and Summer. Summer was Seth's girlfriend. Kinda. For the time being. And Marissa was his girlfriend. Sort of. He never knew when another break up was lurking around the corner, another confusing attempt at distancing himself, only to be pulled back in. He didn't completely understand why he let Marissa yo-yo with his feelings, and the one time he had tried to explain it to Seth, he had gotten so frustrated with himself he had clammed up for days. Ryan knew that Seth thought he had upset him, and it was easier to let Seth believe that than to try and explain that after so long, he was used to being a constant figure in a completely inconsistent relationship. It didn't really matter whether it was his mother or Marissa pushing and pulling him. He had gotten accustomed to being seasick.

Ryan pushed those thoughts to their rightful place in the back of his mind and tried to focus on the night ahead, but all he could do was think about Seth's lips. They were so soft. And the more he thought about it—or, rather, tried to stop thinking about—he realized that Seth had sorta been kissing him back. And that scared him almost as much as the fact that he had kissed Seth in the first place. What was going on?

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Seth and Ryan drove to Summer's in silence. Ryan realized that it was the longest time period in the history of their friendship that Seth had been silent when no one else was talking. Ryan had sometimes wished Seth could learn to appreciate silence, but now he would have given anything to hear Seth babbling away about some comic book—er, "graphic novel" or some diatribe about the superior musical stylings of Death Cab, or anything. Maybe even the kiss, just something so Seth would be talking. Ryan chuckled as he realized the tables had been turned.

"Something funny?" Seth's voice broke the silence like glass shattering. He never took his eyes off the road, and Ryan couldn't tell what expression he wore.

"I was just thinking about all the times I've wanted you to shut up, and now I'm desperate for you to talk." Ryan clamped his mouth shut as the last words escaped. That was not at all how he had wanted that sentence to be phrased. He could tell Seth was hurt. He tried again. "I didn't mean it like that."

"It's okay. I know what you meant." Seth's voice was even, but Ryan knew he was still upset.

"I just meant that the shoe is kind of on the other foot now. You're being silent and broody, and I'm talking. It's funny if you think about it."

Seth's voice was reluctantly amused. "I am not broody. Angel is broody. I am contemplative. And you could never wear my shoes. Yours are two sizes smaller."

"Sorry." Ryan smiled. Joking again. That was good. And yet, it still felt weird. Suddenly, Seth spoke up again. "Look, this is ridiculous. Obviously we don't have time between here and Summer's house to hash out all the intricacies of what can only be described as the strangest dance lesson ever, but maybe we could just agree to talk about it later so that we can both start breathing normally again. So, tomorrow, we'll talk. Now, we just prom. Okay?" Seth's voice was pleading.

"Okay. Yes. That works." Ryan took a real breath for the first time since the kiss. He hadn't noticed his breathing become abnormal, but obviously Seth had.

"Okay," Seth echoed, as he pulled into Summer's drive. It was going to be an interesting night.