Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from The Tribe.  They are the property of Cloud 9.

This story takes place during the middle of Season 1.   It revolves around Dirk, the shady pimp who kidnaps Salene.  He is a real character, but only has about two minutes worth of screen time.

Chapter 1: 

Dirk swallowed convulsively, trying to keep down Roanne's poor excuse for food.  How could the girls eat this slop?  He carefully lifted up his spoon and examined the beans with a thickly lined eye.  Dirk suddenly snorted, remembering the poor girl that had stayed briefly in his . . .care.  She had been sick after every meal.  Roanne told him that she was bulimic, whatever that meant. 

"Maybe I'm bulimic too," Dirk said, speaking to his spoon, "If it means that I have a low tolerance for eating crap."  He lowered his spoon delicately and began to rub the large bruise on his arm.  The bulimic girl's Neanderthal boyfriend had left quite a few dents in Dirk's body when they had escaped. 

Dirk ran a manicured hand through his wavy hair and sighed.

"Finished eating?" Roanne asked, peering into his room.

"Yes." he said shortly, gesturing impatiently to the air.  Roanne picked his bowl up and began to walk away.  She hesitated and turned around. 

"Dirk?" she asked meekly. 

"What do you want?  I'm a little busy here." He said coldly, reaching for his Rubik's cube.

"Are you planning to go look for Salene?  We can't let word get out about our little business." she said nervously.  Dirk stared at her.  Who was Salene?  Ah yes, he remembered now, the bulimic girl.

"She was wasn't very bright, if I remember correctly," Dirk sneered, "I hardly think she'll blow our cover.

"I still think we should-" Roanne began.

"Fine.  Tell Bitch to go check it out." Dirk said, fumbling with his cube.

"You mean Mitch?"

"Just tell him to wander around the city until he sees a girl with freakish red hair.  Do you think he can handle that?"

"Well . . ."

"Go away, Roanne.  You're beginning to annoy me." Dirk said callously, turning his chair away from her.  He began to file his nails and hum.

"I'll get Mitch right on it, sir!" Roanne said cheerfully.

"Why must I be surrounded by idiots?" Dirk muttered as she left the room, "It's like they're attracted to me."

10 minutes later

"Dirk, we have a little problem," Roanne said breathlessly as she collapsed onto his desk,  "The Locos captured Mitch and they will be roasting him on a spit momentarily."

Dirk pondered this statement briefly. 

"Well, I guess I have to find Salene myself." He said, walking towards the door.

"What about Mitch?" Roanne asked.

"I've been meaning to fire him for a while." Dirk said, chortling.  "Get it, Roanne?  Fire him."

Roanne stared perplexedly as Dirk strode out of the room, laughing like a schoolgirl.

Dirk was hopelessly lost.  All the buildings had the same graffiti and all the streets were littered with the same trash.  He had been meandering around aimlessly for the past two hours.  He suddenly had a longing for Roanne's fried crap. 

The air was getting noticeably colder.  Dirk's exposed midriff was uncomfortably chilly. 

"Maybe I should find a place to sl-" CRACK!!!  Dirk was cut off as a table leg connected solidly with the back of his head.

When Dirk finally came around, he saw a group of anxious children huddled near him.  He reached out to touch one, but his hand met cold metal.

"Am I in a cage?!" he shrieked, jumping up.

"Actually, you're in the cage." A small girl said.

"Who the hell are you?" Dirk asked snottily, rubbing the back of his head.  He could feel a nice bump developing.

"I think you know who I am." Another girl said, stepping out of the shadows.

"Uh . . . Vaseline, was it?" Dirk said, scooting back slightly.

"It's Salene, actually.  But I'm sure you already knew that." She said menacingly.

"Salene," Dirk said awkwardly, "How nice to see you again."

"Likewise." Salene said coldly.

"How have you been?" Dirk asked lamely.

"Great.  I'd be doing better, though, if you would stop trying to hunt me down."  Salene said, brandishing the table leg from behind her back.

"Um . . ." Dirk said, his back completely flat against the bars.  Salene came slowly towards the cage and unlocked it.  She opened the door carefully and walked towards him, running her table leg across the floor.
            "Please don't kill me!" Dirk begged, falling to his knees, "I can't die in vinyl pants!"