Gift

Chapter Nine
Trust

            Liberty and Connor walked peacefully around campus, appearing to be every bit the typical unobtrusive couple.  Little did the casual observer know they were discussing mystical powers, connections, convergences, and mistrust.  Liberty explained what she and Wesley had discovered quietly as Connor listened intently, completely absorbed in what she was telling him.

"So, we haven't told anyone else.  Wesley and I have decided to wait until we have more information to tell others."

"Because you don't trust Angel."

"Wesley is suspicious of him, yes.  I'm respecting his theory and request by not telling Angel."

"But you personally trust Angel."

"He does have a lot of connections to this convergence, some that seem beyond coincidence to me.  But I haven't gotten a bad read from him.  He doesn't have a darker purpose that I can sense."

Connor stopped walking, her words sinking in.  She was very good at evading his questions, but she'd dropped clues she hadn't intended.  She couldn't read him as bad?  She couldn't sense a darker Angel?  What did all that mean?  He led her to a bench to make her look at him directly.  He needed answers.

"How can you sense whether Angel is bad or not?"

Liberty looked like a deer caught in headlights as she realized she'd said too much.  Evidently, she had to watch what she said around Connor.  He was sharp and apparently hung on every word she said.

"I can usually read people's feelings very well."

"Don't lie to me, Libby."

She hadn't answered fast enough for him, and her entire demeanor changed.  She seemed closed off all of a sudden, guarded.  Connor reached out and guided her chin up so she would have to look him in the eye.  He didn't know what kind of reaction he would set off by doing so.  He wanted to know about her.  She knew everything about him and he knew next to nothing about her.  As their gazes locked, she could feel how much he wanted her to trust him.  She shuddered as she the feeling of vampire-like qualities struck her.  She could sense the vampire in him and that made no sense.  He always gave that feeling off.  Despite that feeling, she knew how much he wanted her trust and she knew how much she needed to trust him even if she couldn't understand her read of him.

"I have a gift, Connor."

"A gift?  For me?"  Connor seemed completely puzzled by her words.  Liberty smiled at his naivety.  He had no idea what she meant.

"Not like a present.  A gift.  An ability.  I can look into people's eyes and read what they are, read what they want and feel.  Like Angel, I knew he was a vampire before anyone told me.  Wesley, I knew was human, Spike was a vampire.  Look, that person over there-"

Liberty indicated the girl she was speaking of.  Connor looked at her as Liberty locked gazes with the girl.

"She's a demon worshipper.  She joined the cult after feeling completely lost at college.  She's a freshman and she's having trouble fitting in, so this cult has given her a home."

Connor bit his lip, knowing he couldn't go up and ask the girl if Liberty was right. 

"You don't have to believe me. You don't have to like me or my gift, but that's what I've been hiding.  That's what I meant."

Connor took a deep breath.  This whole supernatural arena was new to him.  He had no idea what to believe and what not to, but he could feel the urgency in Liberty's words.  She wanted him to believe her so desperately.  Because it was true.  She wanted him to know because it was true and she was afraid he'd run.  Because she was a freak.  But he wouldn't, because he was a freak too.

"I believe you, Liberty."

She sighed in relief, the weight of keeping her secret from Connor falling off of her shoulders.  Now she could keep Connor's secret and he could keep hers.  Their relationship would be different now; it was far beyond just a working relationship now.  They couldn't even use that excuse anymore.  And Liberty didn't really want to.

"Good.  Listen, Connor, no one else really knows about this.  Wolfram and Hart does, but most people don't."
"I won't tell.  Don't worry."

"I won't."

She checked her watch as she noticed the sun was setting.

"Oh, I've gotta go.  I'm meeting Spike for dinner tonight."

"Spike for dinner?  You aren't the main course, I hope."

Liberty giggled at the idea of Spike eating her.

"Spike has a soul.  Plus, Wolfram and Hart has that whole no-human-eating policy.  So don't worry."

"I won't." He replied, repeating the words she'd just spoken.

Liberty smiled at him as she stood from the bench.  She walked away from him before turning back.  "I'll see you later, Connor."
"Later, Liberty."  He watched her walk away with a different feeling inside.  She wasn't fleeing from him because he was a freak.  She had mystical powers too.  He wasn't alone anymore.  And neither was she.

            Wesley paused outside Angel's office, unsure of whether he wanted to knock or not.  He wanted to ask Angel questions, find out if he was responsible for Fred's untimely demise, but he wasn't sure if he wanted the answers.  Wesley finally lifted his hand to pound three times on the door and then waited for an answer. 

"Come in."

Wesley opened the door and stuck his head in.  It was best to feign oblivion, so he remained the ever-polite British Watcher.

"I do hope you aren't busy, Angel."

"No.  Just going over some paperwork.  What's going on, Wesley?" 

Angel had been expecting Wesley's visit.  Since Spike had told him about Wesley and Liberty's discovery, he'd been waiting.  He'd been dreading it.  Before, he'd never had to lie to his friends.  They didn't know; their memories were gone.  He just never told them about his son.  But now Wesley knew and he would have to blatantly lie to their face.  And Angel had the sinking feeling that Wesley would find out anyway.  Wesley had that talent.  That's why Angel needed him.

"I just wanted to ask you some questions."
"About what?"

Wesley took his place in a leather chair in front of Angel's desk.  He gathered his words to speak carefully.  Anything could hint Angel that Wesley knew.  Angel was evil or very possibly so.  Wolfram and Hart may have corrupted him.  Wesley had to be delicate with his words.

"We never really talked about why you accepted the deal with the law firm, Angel."

"I knew the resources were far greater than what we had.  To fight Evil, we needed to be a part of it."

"And that's the only reason you took the contract?"
"Yes."

Angel stared Wesley down, challenging him to dispute that fact.  Angel figured if he showed indignation and challenge, Wesley would leave it alone for a while.  He might even feel guilty for thinking Angel was behind some big scheme.  Angel didn't know what would happen for sure, but he knew that his best bet was to send Wesley off track.  Angel bit his lip as he thought about all Wesley had done to him.  Wesley had kidnapped his son, which sent him to Quortoth, which led to Connor's return as a teenager, which led to his anger towards Angel.  So Connor's unhappiness was partly Wesley's fault.  Of course, Wesley didn't know that.  It was better for Wesley that he didn't remember Connor.  Wesley had no idea what he was messing with and the consequences his conscience would suffer if he ever found out.  Angel's silence gave Wesley time to digest what he had said.  Something in Wesley changed, noticeably, but Angel didn't know what to do about it.  Did Wesley already know he was lying?  Did he already suspect him for signing their lives away to the devil to save his son? 

"All right.  We didn't make it a group discussion or anything, so I've always been curious as to why you chose to take this job.  I know now.  You satisfied my curiosity."

Wesley stood abruptly and headed towards the door.

"Wesley, have you found anything out on that Johnson case?"

"Johnson case?  Oh, Liberty's case?  No.  Nothing."

They stared at each other for a moment, wrapped in their lies and truths.  Wesley smiled oddly before leaving the office.

            Liberty hurried into the restaurant.  Outback.  Spike liked the bloomin' onion.  Said it was almost as good as The Bronze's.  Liberty didn't really know what he was talking about, but she'd agreed to go.  Spike was there already.  He must have left the offices as soon as the sun set.  She walked back to the table and sat down when Spike glanced up and winked at her.

"I already ordered the bloomin' onion.  It'll be the best bloody thing you've ever tasted."

"I hope it's not bloody."

Spike stopped sipping his beer for a moment, positive he'd used the curse in front of her before.  Then, he realized it was her try at a lame joke.

"Nice, luv.  I promise, I'll keep the blood for myself."

Liberty's delighted laughter rang out.  Spike couldn't help but smile.  Liberty was magnetic.  Her moods rubbed off on him, whether she was sad or happy.  Lucky for him, tonight she was happy.  But hearing her laughter made Spike's conscience prick at him.  He was lying and spying on the poor girl.  She didn't have a clue.  She was so oblivious to it and he felt horrible.  She trusted him and he was betraying her.  He wasn't even sure why he was helping Captain Forehead anyway.  He didn't even like Angel.  Spike sighed and took another swig of his beer.  Liberty ordered a Dr. Pepper and sipped as she settled into the booth.

"Sorry I was late.  I went to see Connor on his college campus.  I loved the college campus.  I can't wait until I get to go to college."

"Connor?  Who's he?"

Spike feigned innocence.  If he acted like he had forgotten her case, she might open up more.

"You know, Connor Johnson.  I'm working on his case.  You were mean to him when you met him."

"That hardly narrows it down, pet.  I'm mean to a lot of people."

"The boy who had mysterious powers pop up.  Come on, Spike.  You're not that forgetful."

"Right.  The whelp in your office."

"Yeah."

"How's that case going?"

Liberty glanced down at her drink, unsure of what to say.  Wesley had said not to tell Angel, but could she tell Spike?  She trusted Spike almost as much as she trusted Wesley.  Spike took care of her.  He wouldn't betray her for Angel.  Spike didn't even like the other ensouled vamp.  He would align himself to her if it came down to her or Angel.  She thought.  She started to tell him what she'd discovered but she stopped herself.  No.  She should ask Wesley before she told Spike anything.  She had to respect Wesley's wishes.

"Not very well. I can't seem to find a lot out.  I keep reading book after book, but nothing seems to fit the descriptions that Connor has given me about his powers and memories."

She tried to force the frustration in her voice, but she didn't know if she succeeded.  Luckily, the appetizer came before she could say anything else.  She took a bite of the onion and chewed thoughtfully.  Spike wondered if maybe she was reconsidering lying to him.  Maybe she would decide to confide in him.  Of course, he would end up taking it to Angel, which would only prove that Liberty's trust was unfounded, but it was possible.

"You're right, Spike.  This is good."

She smiled brightly and Spike looked away.  He was a horrible person.

            Wesley slammed the door to his office and tossed all the books off his desk.  He felt like screaming, yelling, and crying all at once.  He had believed in Angel and he had been wrong.  Angel was probably responsible for Fred's death.  Angel was responsible for everything else.  He knocked the phone off his desk next, but instead of hearing a satisfying crash, he heard nothing.  He looked up and found Illyria's blue eyes staring curiously at him with the fallen phone in her hand.

"You are throwing your talking device now.  Something is not right."

"No, Illyria.  Everything is wrong."

"Including me?"

"Not including you."

"Is it the half-breed?  He has betrayed you, then."
"Yes, Illyria, he has.  He lied to my face and acted like it was nothing.  Who knows how long he has been lying to me.  He could be responsible for Cordelia's death or-"

"The shell's death?  I do not know."

Wesley slid down to the floor, propping his back against the desk.  Illyria knelt down as well, in front of him.  She stared at him to the point of making him uncomfortable.  She acted as though he was in a laboratory for her study.  He supposed that was Fred's inquisitive nature coming through.  Or perhaps it was all Illyria.  She did enjoy learning new things.

"You will not continue working at the Wolf, Ram and Hart."

"Yes, I will."

"But you are being betrayed by those you trust most."

"Are you betraying me?"

She stopped moving as she tried to make sense of his words. 

"No.  I am not.  Are you betraying me?"

"No.  I am not."  He echoed her words. 

"Then why do you continue working for the half-breed?"

"Because someone has to watch him.  If no one does, he may be able to get away with all the lies and secrets."

"So you will betray him as well."

"I suppose so."

"I could kill the half-breed."

"No, you can't draw attention to yourself."

"I am a superior being.  I am supposed to have attention on me."

"Not when you're a fugitive deity."
"I curse this shell."

"Never curse the shell."

Wesley's eyes widened as he realized he had called Fred the shell for the first time.  It had just rolled off his tongue.  Was he really starting to see them as separate people?  He knew Fred wasn't in the body anymore.  No, Illyria's distinctly different soul was in it.

"I will not kill him, yet.  But if he continues to betray you, I will."  Illyria said it with distinct defiance and protectiveness in her voice.  Apparently he had grown on her, much in the same way she had grown on him.  Wesley reached his hand out and gripped Illyria's. 

"You don't have to worry about me.  I can take care of Angel."

"I would never worry about a lower being.  I do not even worry for my equals."

"I never meant to presume."  Illyria nodded and jerked her hand back.  She felt something she did not understand.  She rarely felt anything but pain and pleasure.  But she could feel it bubbling inside of her.  She recognized the feeling as devotion, according to her shell's memories.  And the feeling wasn't towards herself.  It was towards another.  A lower being.