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Repercussions - Chapter Twenty-One

The apartment was small, dirty and in a neighborhood that even the lowlife residents of Nar Shadda considered bad, but it was cheap and that was the most important factor as far as the fugitive Jedi were concerned. Master Yoda had given them a generous amount of credits before Kyran and Devin had left for C'lasi V but they wouldn't last forever.

Qui-Gon was on his stomach, back wrapped in bacta bandages. They had yet to find access to a bone knitter for his leg, so for now it was encased in primitive cast. He dozed restlessly, the pain medication making him groggy. Devin sat at the rickety table on the other side of the one room apartment, sorting through the various wires and circuits they had gathered. Qui-Gon's lightsaber was back at the Temple, returned by the C'lasi government as proof of his death. They had hoped to be able to get enough supplies that with Kyran's extra crystal, would allow them to build a temporary saber for Qui-Gon.

Qui-Gon lifted his head slightly hearing a door slam in their apartment and Kyran entered, his head covered in a dark headdress that he'd found when they arrived. His arms were loaded with supplies, which he set down on their rickety kitchen table. Wordlessly he pulled a datacard out of his pocket and handed it to Devin. "The government of Nar Shadda is giving these out to everyone on the street. I think you should take a look." He ignored Qui-Gon's curious look.

Devin took the datacard and inserted it into his datapad. "Not a great picture of you, although I look fantastic as always."

Kyran rolled his eyes as he removed his headdress. "I can't help it if Gaikusan doesn't have a good picture of me. I didn't exactly pose for the camera."

"Wouldn't have mattered if you did, with your face it would still be a lousy picture," Devin pulled out the datacard and tossed it back to Kyran who shoved it deep in his pocket.

Qui-Gon frowned having only been half-listening until the mention of Gaikusan, wondering what exactly his friends were talking about and he sat up slowly. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, Qui-Gon. I'm sorry to wake you. Hungry? Kyran just brought back some supplies."

Qui-Gon's gaze narrowed. "It's not nothing." Slowly he got up from the bed and hobbled over, bracing himself on the wall as he went.

"Qui-Gon, you have to stay off that leg. Its bad enough that we don't have anything more than splints to hold it in place," said Devin. He knew 'nursemaiding' drove Qui-Gon crazy. Hopefully he'd be distracted enough not to follow up on the datacard.

Qui-Gon frowned as he lowered himself into a chair with some difficulty. "I'd stay off it, if you two wouldn't try to hide things from me. What is it?"

Devin chuckled. "No you wouldn't, you've always been terrible about staying in bed when injured. I wouldn't be surprised if the healers had to resort to strapping you down. Kyran was out looking for something we could use as a lightsaber hilt. Any luck?"

Qui-Gon rolled his eyes. "I'll have you know I have never been strapped down. Sedated yes, but never tied."

Kyran answer was enough to distract him for a few minutes as Kyran pulled out some of his supplies. "Not just yet, but I haven't given up. There's a used speeder junkyard not far from here that I plan to try next. Maybe I can get a part to use as a hilt."

"Worse comes to worse, we can use conduit piping. It would be a bit clunky, but it might work in a pinch. Kyran, since you did the shopping I'll put everything away and make some lunch." Devin had noticed the way Kyran was trying to avoid using his right hand. He'd refused to use any of their limited supplies on the blaster wound on his upper arm and after a few days had refused to let Devin take a look at. Stubborn, sighed Devin to himself. He was surrounded by stubborn men who refused to admit that they had any limits.

Qui-Gon frowned at Kyran, watching as he sank into one of the dirty reclining chairs. His shirt had dark moisture stained into the back. "Kyran?"

"Yeah?"

"What's that on your arm?" He pointed to the dark stain.

Kyran twisted slightly, grimacing at the motion. Sithspit, he thought to himself. "I must have leaned against something. I'll go clean up."

Qui-Gon grabbed him before he could get up. "I don't think so."

"Sithspit," Kyran repeated aloud. "Don't do that, Qui-Gon."

Qui-Gon's gaze narrowed thoughtfully and he pushed up Kyran's sleeve. He noted the rough bandages wrapped around a portion of his upper arm. "Just leaned against something?" He queried in a hard voice.

"Well, maybe not. Still needs cleaned up, if you would be so kind as to let go."

Qui-Gon stared at Kyran, his face hard. "I am a grown adult. There is no reason for you and Devin to both be treating me like I'm a crèche initiate."

"You have enough to occupy you, without worrying about things you can't do anything about," Devin said.

He stood up, wobbling slightly on his leg and limped to the cabinet next to the bed where the medkit was. "So you two decided to conspire to not tell me about your injuries. I see."

"There's limited supplies and your injuries are the most severe, so logically you have the priority," said Devin, but he made no attempt to stop Qui-Gon. His own experience when Qui-Gon discovered his injuries convinced him it was a pointless endeavor.

"Sithspit about our limited supplies, Devin Ly'rath!. They've been untreated for months and I can last a little longer. I won't have you hurting yourself because of some foolish idea that I need supplies more than you. I've managed. If that gets infected we'll have even less of a chance of getting back home."

Kyran shook his head and started to unwind the bandages around his arm. The wound had scabbed over, the edges were an angry red and pus was beginning to ooze from underneath the scabs. "If it will make you feel better to clean it out, fine. But no bacta. There's no reason it can't heal on its own."

Devin frowned, he knew Kyran had been injured in the escape but he hadn't seen the extent of the wound. "We can spare the bacta to take care of that infection."

Qui-Gon glanced at Devin, surprised that he had taken his side. Then his gaze darkened. "Yes bacta. If the two of you are going to conspire to hide injuries then I think I should treat you both in the same way. I took care of Devin, so now it's your turn."

Devin grinned, "Now you know what I faced back on the ship. Might as well sit still and take it like a Jedi."

Kyran shot Devin a disgusted look. "Fine. If it makes you both happy, I'll just sit here like a good little boy and take my medicine."

Qui-Gon scowled. "Well if you'd taken care of yourself then I wouldn't have had to do it for you. Besides you're always quick enough to get me to the healers when I don't want to go, so I decided to return the favor."

The good-natured banter, despite the serious undertones of the conversation, made them all feel a little better. Just like old times, the three of them standing together against all the challenges the universe could throw at them. Then Qui-Gon dropped the bottle of antiseptic spray from his injured hand. The plastic bottle rolled away from him. Back still torn, leg bound in a cast nearly to his hip, he was helpless to retrieve it. Frustration at his own limitation quickly boiled up and he swore viciously.

"Its okay, Qui. I'll take care of it," Devin said softly, retrieving the bottle of antiseptic from under the table.

Qui-Gon glowered as he watched Devin carefully treat Kyran's arm. A job once again that he'd botched and had to be rescued from. He clenched his teeth. He couldn't even lean over to pick up a bottle. He swore under his breath viciously. He had screwed up his mission royally and thanks to him both of his friends were now injured and hiding on a planet known for harboring criminals like them. He sighed. He hated Gaikusan. He knew it was wrong but at the moment he found he didn't care.... and speaking of Gaikusan. His eyes strayed to Kyran's pocket. The datacard was half-hanging out. Quickly while they were occupied he grabbed it before they could stop him and slipped it into the datapad.

"Qui-Gon . . . " Kyran began, only to be quickly cut off by Qui-Gon.

"When were you planning on informing me of this?" he asked coldly staring down at his picture... and the 10,000 credit reward.

Devin and Kyran looked at each other guiltily. "You didn't need to know. There's nothing we can do about it and you should be focused on healing." Kyran said quietly.

"So not only do you hide your injuries you hide this from me too? What else are you hiding? " He snapped.

"There's nothing else. And we would have told you eventually about the bounty, when you were better. You know why we hid our injuries from you. Besides, what does the bounty matter, it won't be much longer before the Council clears us," said Devin.

Qui-Gon shook his head and backed away from them. "I can't believe this. How could you both lie to my face and tell me there was nothing wrong?" He shook his head incredulously. "My I bet you're both laughing inside at me. Placing bets on how long you could keep it hidden?" He snapped viciously. He was tired of being treated like a child. With that he turned on his heel and ran from the room…or tried.

Devin stepped in front of Qui-Gon, blocking his exit. "Qui-Gon, we weren't trying to hurt you, just protect you."

Kyran just sat and watched. Somehow he'd allowed Qui-Gon to get hurt again.

"Protect me from what?! " Qui-Gon practically shouted at him. "I'm a Jedi Knight. I should be protecting, not the one needing coddling. Get out of my way, Devin."

"So you can go where?" demanded Devin, a bit surprised at the violence of Qui-Gon's outburst. His friend had a temper, but usually he kept it under tight control. Must be the pain medicine, Devin rationalized.

"I'd like to go to the refresher, if you don't mind. Or am I not capable of that either?" He snapped.

Devin slowly got out of the way. Wordlessly he watched as Qui-Gon stormed out, slamming the door behind him.

Qui-Gon glowered at himself in the mirror of the refresher. He looked awful. His hair was still cut short from his time in prison and his back had cuts all over it. He supposed this was what a person should normally look like when nobody trusted them. His gaze darkened thinking of Devin and Kyran. How had they both kept injuries hidden? /Because you're not good enough. That's why not. You can't even tell when you're friends are injured./ Qui-Gon scowled at the nasty voice in his subconscious and in a sudden display of temper he smashed his fist into the wall and he cursed violently, hoping that would be enough to shut his inner voice up.



"That went well," Devin commented sarcastically.

"About as well as teaching a rancor to learn to read. " Kyran sighed.

"Maybe he was right. He's a part of this as much as we are. It wasn't fair of us to keep things from him."



/Temper temper. Why Gaikusan was right. With a temper like that you shouldn't be a Jedi./ Furious, Qui-Gon grabbed a bar of soap that was still in it's packaging that Kyran had brought and hurled it across the small room.



Kyran guiltily looked at the floor. "I suppose you're right. We've been going about this the wrong way."




/Honestly, maybe you should resign your rank. That is, if they figure out that you're not dead in the first place. Then maybe nobody would be in this type of situation ever again but yourself./ Qui-Gon put a hand to his head. He had to make it stop. He balled his right hand into a fist and swung hard at the mirror.



"We just both have to remember that Qui-Gon ---" the loud crash and the sound of breaking glass from the refresher interrupted Devin. Both men dashed towards the door. "Qui-Gon! Are you alright?" called Devin. He didn't want to further anger his friend by bursting in on him.

"Go away!" He shouted talking to both the inner voice and the voice on the other side of the door. Who was it? Oh...he recognized the voice suddenly. Devin. He stared at his hand in dismay. How had that piece of glass gotten there? Blood dripped down his arm but he didn't care. He slumped to the floor. "Leave me alone," he pleaded trying to get the voice out of his head which continued to berate him.

"Qui-Gon . . . we're sorry, we were only trying to help," said Kyran.

"Qui-Gon, open the door. We'll talk this out." Kyran said, trying to keep his voice calm. The sudden burst of pain that both felt over their bond with Qui-Gon sent a spike of worry through them.

"No! Leave me alone. All you're going to do is lie to me." He rocked slightly in the floor of the refresher and then turned trying to put his back to the door when he bumped into the toilet. That hadn't been there a minute ago. Or had it? He looked wildly around. The sink seemed suddenly a lot closer to him than it had been too. Was it his imagination? No...Surely stable walls couldn't close in on him. He panted for breath, starting to hyperventilate. He had to get out...but he couldn't. He was locked away, totally helpless, abandoned by his friends and forgotten by everyone but those who hated him and tormented him. He moaned slightly.

"Qui-Gon, answer me," called Kyran. The sudden silence ominous. Over the bond he could sense only despair.

Qui-Gon shook with fear. That was Gaikusan's voice. Wasn't it? He would never answer. He would never turn...never. He wouldn't answer the voice. Maybe if he were silent it would go away.

Devin tried the door handle and discovered it was locked. After a moment's hesitation, he used the Force to throw the simple bar latch open. If Qui-Gon were just giving them the silent treatment, he'd just add this intrusion to the list of things he owed Qui-Gon an apology for. The sight that met his eyes when he swung open the door froze him in shock. Qui-Gon was huddled on the floor among the ruins of the refresher, glass shards littered sink below the shattered mirror, and blood flowed from his hand. "Oh, Qui-Gon" Devin heard Kyran say softly from behind him.

"Get out! Get away.." Qui-Gon tried to reach out for the Force and push them away .. hearing the voice again in his head..

Qui-Gon pushed himself back farther into the refresher. "Leave me alone." Images swam through his mind, guards dragging him from the cell only to chain him up and torment him more. He backed away from the guard seeing him reach for his hand and he jerked away feeling skin contact.

"Qui-Gon, let us help you. We were wrong to keep things from you, we promise we won't do that again."

"Get away from me," He called the guard in front of him something very dirty in Rodian. He winced after he said it realizing that he would be severely punished for back talking to a guard.

Devin frowned, "Hey! You've got a right to be mad at us, but we're your friends. And your bleeding all over the floor."

"Since when have you cared? Guards never care if inmates bleed to death as long as they don't have to clean up." He reached out to the Force, trying to push them away, but he couldn't focus properly.

"Guards?" echoed Devin.

"He's having a flashback," Kyran suddenly realized. "He thinks he's still in Tuvlat. Qui-Gon, snap out of it. You're free. Look around you, look at us. We are your friends, Devin and Kyran." He backed up the words by sending an image of Devin and himself.

Qui-Gon shook his head wildly. "No. Get out of my head. Leave me alone." He put his bloody hand to his head, trying to keep the confusing voices out.

Kyran knelt next to Qui-Gon, "Yes, Qui-Gon. Its all right. You are safe, you are free. Look at me, see the truth."

Qui-Gon tried to jerk away but there was nowhere else for him to go. " No. it's not alright. '

"Not completely, but together we will make things right. Come back to us, Qui-Gon," Devin said.

He glanced from one to the other. Slowly he came to realize that he was lying on a floor and that his hand was throbbing. "Kyran?" He said carefully as if testing out the name for the first time...

"Yes, Qui-Gon, its me. Lets get you back to bed and we'll take care of that hand, okay?" Kyran slowly reached out to Qui-Gon's uninjured hand to help him up.

Qui-Gon nodded slowly and carefully tried to get off the fresher floor. He glanced around at the mess he made and was mortified that he'd lost control of himself and destroyed their 'fresher. His face turned red as he muttered. "Sorry."

"Its okay, in this dump its hardly noticeable." Devin joked weakly as he moved to help support Qui-Gon. Together, Kyran and Devin got him back into bed, carefully laying him on his stomach. Devin started to clean up the damage in the refresher while Kyran carefully picked the shards of broken glass from Qui-Gon's hand.

Qui-Gon inhaled sharply as Kyran picked glass from his hand. Force how it hurt. He sighed as he dropped his gaze to his feet in shame. Why had he totally gone to pieces like that? He'd totally destroyed the only refresher they had in the place.

Kyran allowed Qui-Gon to avoid his gaze until he finished cleaning and bandaging his hand. When he finally finished, he gently wrapped the hand in bandages. By then, Devin had returned and sat silently watching.

"Want to talk about it?" Kyran asked.

"No."

There were a few minutes of awkward silence before he spoke again. "I'm sorry about the fresher."

"Don't worry about it," said Devin. "Qui-Gon, about us keeping things from you, " Devin's voice trailed off.

At that, Qui-Gon looked up, meeting Devin's gaze. He felt so foolish. How could he have been deceived so easily?

Kyran and Devin both saw the anger lurking in Qui-Gon's eyes and believed it was directed at them. "We won't do it again," promised Devin.

"Besides, we should have realized how pointless it was. It was only a matter of time before you figured things out." added Kyran.

Qui-Gon said nothing. He only nodded. Anger at Gaikusan for reducing him to this clouded his thoughts. He wanted to bring him to justice. Gaikusan should pay for the lives he had ruined besides his own.