Pain
A/n: Here's Chapter 2 of Twisted Memories. I don't have anything to go at the bottom of this like the poem in chapter one. But when I showed this to girl at my table, she said she almost cried. That had me go "Damn I'm good." Just kidding. Did you ever wonder how Hikaru was before she went to Cephiro, before becoming a magic knight? Chapter 2 will explain a little more about Hikaru…
Pain
"Miss Shidou, will you please pay attention?" The teacher said standing in front of Hikaru's desk. The red haired beauty looked up sleepily.
"Sorry Clef-sensei." Hikaru lifted her head up and sat up straight trying to pay attention. Hikaru stifled a yawn as she pushed a strand of red hair out of the way.
"Its okay Hika, he's boring and all, but I don't fall asleep." Miwako whispered smiling.
"Shut up Miwa, you fall asleep in Dahl-sensei's class." Hikaru retorted.
"I still get the lesson done."
"By copying me!" Hikaru burst out. The rest of the class looked at her and snickered. Hikaru sank into her chair red from embarrassment. "Oi…"
"I'm not even going to give you detention, just sit outside until class is over." Clef-sensei pointed to the door. Hikaru grumbled out the door after she picked up her stuff. When the bell rang, Hikaru left the hall before her teacher could stop her. She waited outside the school building for Miwako and Mikako for their walk home.
"Hika, Clef-sensei is a grumpy old man who needs a girlfriend." Mikako said happily opening a candy bar wrapper.
"We already knew that Miwako," Hikaru said.
"I'm Mikako." Mikako said shaking her head. "Sometimes I wish 'kaa-san didn't name us so similar."
"See you guys tomorrow!" Hikaru said when they reached the Shidou Dojo.
"Bye!" The two girls chorused as they walked away. Hikaru walked inside her house and straight to her room to do her homework.
"Need to get this done sooner or later…" Hikaru sighed before beginning on her homework.
Hikaru went to dinner an hour later when she was called down by her brother.
"Hikaru, your teacher phoned, I'm just amazed that you can manage to pass your classes and still get caught sleeping in class." The eldest of the Shidou brothers said.
Why does he always do this to me? I don't fall asleep in class on purpose. If I'm not arguing with him or the other two, it's a whole different reason.
"Satoru-nii-san, I didn't get detention today, I just had to sit out in the hall until school was over." Hikaru explained.
"Hikaru, you're slipping again, mom and dad want you to keep up in school. Once you're in college you can do whatever you want." Satoru concluded.
"I'm not falling asleep in class on purpose!" Hikaru said losing her calm.
"That's beside the point Hika, sitting outside the class is the same as missing it. Oh, and Miwako called, she says you need to study for those exams tomorrow." Kakeru said walking in.
"Iie! I forgot about the exams!" Hikaru exclaimed. She got up from the table and ran to her room.
"She didn't say anything about these exams. Is there something she's not telling us?" Satoru pondered watching Hikaru's quick departure.
"I think it's the same thing as before, Hikaru doesn't want to talk to us." Kakeru stated.
"I cant believe I forgot about the exams! Argh!!" Hikaru opened one of the drawers in her desk and started throwing stuff out of it. "Ouch." Hikaru pulled her hand from the drawer and sucked on her index finger. She tasted blood and spit on the plush floor. She moved something's around and saw a box cutter where she pricked herself.
"I haven't seen this thing in a while. This was when I was suicidal and everything." Hikaru closed her eyes a moment before sitting on her bed looking at the box cutter.
"Maybe I should cut myself…for old time's sake." Hikaru held the blade to a spot above her elbow and made a thin slice. She smiled. The warmness of her blood trickling down her arm relieved her stress and let her cares and worries flow down her arm.
"Hikaru?" Hikaru shot up and quickly wiped the blood off her arm and put the blade away before opening her door.
"Y-yeah onii-san?" Hikaru looked at her brother nervously.
"Mikako's on the phone, she wants to talk to you about math." Hikaru's brother handed her the phone before heading back to eat.
"Moshi moshi." Hikaru said holding the phone up to her ear.
"Hey Hika, did you finish the homework?" Mikako asked.
"Yeah. You want to see it tomorrow? I gotta go, you know, shower, sleep. All that stuff," Hikaru smiled.
"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow. Bye." Mikako hung up with a click. Hikaru looked at her arm and saw that the blood was dripping again.
"I'm gonna have to fix that." Hikaru dug in the drawer again for the band-aids she kept in there.
"Hika, whats up with you?" Miwako asked Hikaru while eating her lunch.
"Nothing Miwa, just a little tired." Miwako shook her head and moved when Mikako came over with her soda.
"Okay Hika, you seemed really weird on the phone last night. What was up?" Mikako asked opening the soda.
"Nothing, I was just kinda tired, you know how it is." Hikaru brushed it off.
"You haven't been tired since you started arguing with your brothers last year. Are you guys fighting again?" Miwako asked.
"No, I'm just not getting enough sleep, that's all." Hikaru looked up at her two, now worried friends.
"You haven't been to tired to talk to us since last year. You kept a lot of secrets from us. Like when you were cutting yourself." Mikako said setting her soda down.
"I'm not trying to kill myself. Gimme a drink of your soda." Hikaru reached across the table and grabbed Mikako's soda. Mikako, out of reflex grabbed where Hikaru cut herself the night before and pulled her soda back.
"Ow!" Hikaru said taking her arm back.
"Sorry Hika, I didn't think I'd grab you that hard." Hikaru shook her head saying it was okay, but she went pale as blood started trickling down her arm.
"Hika, I know Mika grabs hard but, she doesn't have nails to make you bleed. Did you cut yourself last night?" Miwako asked.
"Yeah, I was putting ice in my soda and it cut my arm." Hikaru said. It was a badly told lie, but a lie nonetheless.
"Hika, how can ice get to your arm? Were you cutting yourself again?" Mikako asked the now very pale Hikaru.
"Hika, I thought you told us you stopped cutting." Miwako looked at Hikaru in a cold way.
"Look, its none of your business if I cut myself or not! Just butt out!" Hikaru said loudly. Mikako and Miwako looked at each other in shock then left without a word.
"When school was out, Hikaru ran home. To her room…to the box cutter. She tore open the drawer a readied the blade.
"Hikaru, are you doing your homework?" Satoru called through the closed door.
"Hai! I'll be down in a bit!" Hikaru took the blade and made a thin, deep slice across her arm. Crimson blood trickled down her arm and she grinned. I'm grinning like an idiot. Hikaru thought to herself. "Why not take all my pains away?" Hikaru made a few more slices across her arm until she was bleeding freely.
"Hikaru, you okay?" Satoru asked 20 minutes later.
"Yeah I'm fine! I'm just going to take a nap!" Hikaru said.
"Okay." Hikaru heard her brothers footsteps descend down the hall. Hikaru cleaned off her arm and sat on her bed.
"I'm going to need a different shirt now." She got off her bed and went to her closet. She pulled out a dark red long sleeve shirt and put it on. She walked toward the dojo when the doorbell rang.
"I'll get it!" Hikaru yelled to her brothers. Hikaru walked to the door and answered it. Miwako and Mikako were standing there.
"Hika, we need to talk." Mikako said grabbing the same arm Hikaru cut herself on and pulled her outside.
"Ow! Mika, that hurts!" Hikaru said pushing Mikako off her arm.
"You've been cutting yourself again haven't you?" Miwako asked. Hikaru looked down and nodded.
"Hika! You got to quit this! When we get to high school you're gonna be the captain of the kendo team!" Mikako said. Hikaru shook her head.
"Its deeper then that. I'm not getting along with my brothers, the teachers think I'm stupid, even though I'm not. You guys wont leave me alone about my cutting. Life has no meaning for me now. You guys need to try and understand that." Hikaru explained, tears leaking from her ruby eyes.
"Look Hika, we've been trying to help you, but all you do is push us away. If you don't want any help from us, then we'll leave you alone." Miwako said walking away. Mikako sigh and waved good-bye before following her sister. Hikaru turned around and ran inside toward her room
Once inside her room, Hikaru took out the box cutter again.
"Now my friends don't even want to talk to me." Hikaru wrote a quick not to her brothers saying good-bye and that she was sorry for what would happen. Hikaru took one last look at the note before sitting on her bed to make the final, deep slice in her vein.
A/n: It's pretty obvious what happened to Hikaru. Like I said, I wouldn't have a poem but I have a quote. Forget regret, or life is yours to miss. Its from RENT by Jonathan Larson. When I typed this, I was copying from a story I previously wrote in Creative Writing, and its a lot shorter since I had to cut out some parts. But as usual, review!!
Cutie Eskimo- Thank you. I'm working on one that fits this chapter.
Teh Nezumi- Sorry Nez, I did it for the reviewers, besides, I call Clef a grumpy old man. Which he is. Of course these are sad, baka.
Sea Mistress- Happy? I added Clef. I like to rush things. I'm a violin player, we like to rush. (With our class, its hella true)
Thankies to all the reviewers!!! (Its pretty obvious that I don't own Rayearth.)