Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel, so on and so forth. You know the drill.

Setting: After FN

A/N: Please review. I'd love any ideas you guys have about what should happen in this story. This is kind of a 'what I would do if I was in Dark Angel' story so feel free to give me some input on that. Thanks.

A Normal Girl

Alec's POV:

I follow Max as we scale the side of a building. There's really no doubt about it. Max has a nicer ass. Although it's really not a fair comparison since she was genetically engineered to be perfect and Maleah just happened to turn out nice by the grace of nature. So, therefore, she has a handicap that I guess puts them at about even and...

"Ow!" I protest as Max's foot slams into my face.

Max looks down at me expressionlessly for a moment, then continues climbing. I guess she noticed where I was looking.

"Not my fault you had to go first." I grumble.

She really shouldn't overreact like that all the time. I mean, can't she take a compliment? So I was looking at her ass. It's what any red-blooded, straight male would do in my situation. Ask anybody.

There's another point for Maleah. She's not mean.

"You know, Max, so far our heists together have really been less that spectacular. First, you lose us that baseball that I was so generously going to split with you. Then, you get us stuck in a closet for hours. Now, you're trying to cause me to slip and injure myself when you know this is a two-man job. Really, Maxie." I shake my head and make disapproving noises.

Max looks down at me again and this time her eyes spark with rage.

"Shut up, Alec." she hisses.

"What?" I ask innocently, "You think I'll wake them up?"

I make myself sound almost hopeful and make faces through the window we're passing. Max's boot connects with the top of my head and, irritated I grab her ankle before she can pull away.

"That's really not the best way to get my attention, Maxie." I inform her.

"Well, I was going to kick your ass, but I got confused. You think you could label which is which?"

"Been that long has it, Max? Can't remember which end is which?" I retort, smirking at her.

She tries to shake her foot free, undoubtedly to kick me again, but I'm not letting go.

"God, I hate you." Max growls, "This is the last time I take you on a heist with me."

"For your information, I'm taking you with me this time. I could have gone solo. You wouldn't have known anything about it until you caught me spending the money. It was only out of the goodness of my heart that I included you."

"And it's only out of the goodness of my heart that I don't kick you in the nuts again and render you permanently impotent."

"It would take more than you to pull that off, Maxie."

Max half-growls, half-screams in fury and I decide that now would be a good time to let go of her. You know, before she decides that cutting my hand off would be the best way to reply.

We make the rest of the climb in silence. Well, maybe not silence. Max is kind of hyperventilating or something. I wait until we reach the roof and I have the opportunity to turn my back to her while I pull up our ropes before I grin. Pissing off Max should really be a sport. I could go pro.

When I turn back towards Max, she's already dislodged a part of the air vent, our point of entry.

"Should I go first this time?" I ask.

"Like I trust you to lead. We'd be lost in two minutes." Max predicts with unjustified skepticism.

"I would not. I'm the one who designed this plan, after all." I remind her.

"That's exactly why I don't like it." Max replies, scowling.

"Whatever. I was just trying to give you a chance to stare at my fine ass, but if you're going to be all doubting and grouchy, then forget it."

Max delivers a quick punch to my arm before lowering herself into the vent system. I make a face at the back of her head before moving to follow her. She really needs to lighten up. I think she's actually gotten even more uptight ever since she took charge at TC. Well, if that's even possible. OC used to tell me that she wasn't always like this, that she used to be like me, a happy-go-lucky sociopath as Logan once said. I still find that hard to believe, but I don't see any reason why OC would lie. Sure wish I could have met Max back then. Oh, well.

I crawl after Max, not thrilled at all to be squeezing through these tight quarters after a cranky female X5. But I can't complain. It was my plan, after all.

"Max, this sucks." I complain.

I never was one to take my own advice.

"Alec, shut up." Max snaps in a whisper.

"You're getting really repetitive, Maxie." I observe, before continuing in my best whiny Max impression, "Shut up, Alec. Go away, Alec. I'll kick your ass, Alec. This is all your fault, Alec. Got any new ones?"

"How about I'm going to ram my fist down your throat and rip out your vocal cords, Alec?" Max growls with mock sweetness.

"Like to see you try." I taunt.

That probably wasn't the best thing I could have said because the next thing I know Max has somehow managed to twist around to face me. I throw up my hands to block the punch I know is coming. But Max once again performs some kind of Max miracle and gets past my defenses to grab my hair...and pull...really hard!

"Ow! Jesus!" I cry, moving quickly towards her to ease the pain.

Surprised, Max moves away and we're suddenly crammed next to each other in the vent. Seeing an opportunity, I send an elbow backwards towards Max's stomach. Her breath rushes out in a woosh against my neck and her grip on my hair relaxes. I quickly flip to face her so she can't tighten her hold again. This proves to be a mistake when Max's fist makes an appearance in my face.

"Bitch!" I exclaim, forgetting until too late the negative effect that name has on Max's attitude and the consequences I suffered the last time I called her that.

Max's eyes widen slightly and I quickly raise one knee to block her's. My groan definitely does not want to relive that experience.

"You...ass!" she returns.

Max's arm winds its way around my throat and begins to close off the lovely connection I have with oxygen.

"Knew...you were...obsessed...with my ass." I choke out.

Max's arm tightens even more. She's making me light headed. I grab her arm and heave while at the same time pushing against the side of the vent with my feet. Max's body flies over my body and I twist the arm she had around my neck behind her back, pushing her face up against the wall.

That's when I heard the old metal groan in protest. Max and I both froze.

"Well, that doesn't sound good." I comment just before the vent sections rip apart and Max and I plummet towards the ground.

The vent fixtures separate from the ceiling and our section take a turn downward, making Max and I slide down and land with less than X5 grace in a pile on the carpet. Another millisecond later, alarms start to go off.

"You forgot to mention that there are motion alarms." Max yells over the noise, smacking me in the back of the head as she tries to untangle herself.

"How was I supposed to know?" I demand in reply.

The damn ropes have somehow managed to get involved in our tangle, making it even harder for me to get away from Miss Moody.

"Some reconnaisance." she scoffs.

"How about you do all the hard work next time, then?"

"You wouldn't know hard work if it kicked you in the balls."

"Of course not. You're the only one who does something that low."

"You asked for it!"

"Like hell!"

"God, I hate you so much!"

"Don't kid yourself."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

I open my mouth to explain it to her when lights suddenly snap on. I crane my neck around to see the owner of the home standing in the doorway wearing a bathrobe and holding a pistol.

"Ummm...hi?" I offer.

I see the muscles in his hand begin to move, preparing to squeeze the trigger. You've got to love the shoot first type. I know that there's no way I'm going to be able to get free of Max and the ropes in time to dodge the bullet. So, I move into the tangle, wrapping my arms around Max's frame and rolling us across the floor. The bullet slams into the carpet in about the same area that my head used to be.

"Get off me!" Max growls in my ear.

"Shut up." I snap, rolling back the way we came in time to dodge another mortal wound.

An idea suddenly comes to mind, but I don't have time to explain it to Max. I hope she'll catch on as I pull my leg up between us and push my foot against her stomach. I hold on to her shoulders as her legs go flying towards Mr. Trigger Happy. I see realization flicker through Max's eyes just before her boots hit the guy's chest. He staggers backwards and fires randomly, blowing out a window. He's off balance, giving Max time to squirm free of the ropes. I trust her to dispactch the guy as I try to make sense of the tangle that is now solely around me. Really, how did we manage this? I've almost got it figured out when a shot lands real close to my arm.

"Hey, watch it!" I yell at Max.

"Sorry." she says quickly in a very unsincere manner.

I grumble about her lack of concern for my wellbeing while I get the last of the ropes undone. I climb to my feet just in time to see the man of the home crumble to the ground unconcscious.

"Took you long enough." I mutter.

"Shut up." she snaps reflexively, "Let's get what we came for and get out before the cops show up."

"Gee, now there's a plan."

Max doesn't reply so I figure that she's decided to ignore me. I follow as she leads the way to the painting I spotted days ago. Then, I notice the fridge.

"Be right back." I whisper.

"Alec! We don't have time for..."

I tune out whatever else she has to say and disappear into the kitchen. I'm starving and there's no doubt in my mind that people as rich as this guy have a well-stocked fridge. I whip open the door and bag everything that looks good. Including some cans of imported beer, a half-eaten piece of chocolate cake wrapped in plastic, and tub of actual ice cream. This guy must really be loaded. I mean, ice cream, real ice cream costs a ton! I've never actually had any. I've just heard about it. This is awesome.

"Alec!" Max snaps from behind me, grabbing my shirt, "Let's go!"

I allow her to tug me out of the room by my clothing, but continue to stare longingly at the remaining items in the fridge. Oh, well. A score's a score.

"Okay, okay." I say, snapping out of it and peeling her hands off me, "I'm coming."

She's probably stretched out my shirt now. Great.

We make for the window and I can hear sirens. The police have arrived. Max glances at me and I motion towards the roof. She nods. Up is the only way out of here. Besides, we're on the top floor anyway. I lean out the window and judge the distance to the roof. It's not too far.

"Max, come here."

She looks at me suspiciously.

"Why?"

"I'm going to give you a boost onto the roof. Then, I can toss you a rope and you can pull me up." I explain slowly so that she can understand.

"No way. I so don't trust you." she shakes her head vehemently.

"Well, you so don't have a choice. Now, hurry up."

She's still shaking her head in protest, but I grab her arm and yank her over, nearly throwing her out the window.

"Now, give me your foot or I'll shove you up there by your ass." I threaten.

Max glares at me, but moves to stand in the window sill and lifts one foot for me to push. I provide the proper momentum and Max goes flying. I see her grab the edge of the roof and flip herself onto it, heels flying over her head so that she lands on her feet. She turns around and leans over the edge, motioning for me to toss up a rope. I comply and give her a minute to brace herself before I climb out the window and put all my weight on the rope.

"Damn, you're heavy." Max complains as I climb.

"Here I thought you were a transgenic with superior strength. My bad." I reply.

"Doesn't mean I want to haul your fat ass around."

"My ass is not fat!" I protest, genuinely hurt by that comment.

"Just hurry up."

I decide to do what she wants for once seeing as there's law enforcement coming up the stairs inside. I make it onto the roof and we both take off running, leaping the expanse to the building next door. Another couple leaps takes us to the end of the street where we whip out the ropes again and climb down.

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