AN: Sorry for the extremely long delay in updating, a little over four months. I have been busy with my engineering team. I hate to brag, but I think this deserves it, The nearly 200 teams were whittled down to a little over forty in regional contests, and the forty plus, were invited to the national competition where we placed well inside the top ten. So please forgive me for the lateness of this chapter, I actually had only the first few paragraphs written before this week. Well enough of that, I really like this chapter so read and review.
Chapter 9: Mind Games
"I CAN'T BELIEVE HE GOT US AGAIN!" Melina said before slamming her lunch tray down on the table.
Mat, Melina, and Lanny turned around in their seats and stared across the cafeteria at their teacher Mr. Dig, Lanny hand an especially disgusted look on his face. "I know Lanny," Mat replied to Lannie's expression, "I thought for sure the double bucket over the door would work. I mean, it worked on Adam." Mat turned to his right where Melina was sitting. "Ah, you still have some honey in your hair."
Melina shot Mat an extremely evil look, warning him that he should not continue. Mat and the others returned to staring at Mr. Dig. "Look at him," Mat said angrily. "On the outside, a goofy little man, and on the inside, a cold blooded prank killer."
The trio turned around and Lanny shot Melina an evil look. "Your right Lanny," Mat interpreted, "it wasn't the best idea to wait until Friday morning to prank Mr. Dig, he knew it would be coming today."
"Oh and the Monday morning pranks were oh so successful," Melina retaliated. "We just need to think of better pranks."
"CNN?" Mat asked.
"Yeah, but we can't have it at my house," Melina replied. "My parents are having the house fumigated."
"Well I guess we will have it at my house then." Matt said. "Now lets go enjoy our recess." The three stood up and returned their trays before heading off to the playground.
Lizzie McGuire let out a big yawn as she stretched her arms. Slowly walking down the stairs, Lizzie noticed how unusually quiet it was for a Saturday morning. The McGuire house would be busy with Jo and Sam rushing to get the house work done and breakfast cooked before Sam ventured off to his softball game. If Matt was around you could bet that at least one of his friends would also be over making all sorts of commotion. As it was their was no signs of anybody inhabiting the house except for the faint sounds of a news report coming from the TV.
As strange as it was, Lizzie was enjoying the silence. The day before had been terrible with half the school laughing at her and cracking jokes. Lizzie was hoping to enjoy the next two days in peace before David's tape would be shown to the entire school.
Lizzie walked into the kitchen and searched for the cereal. After pouring a bowl of Lucky Charms she made her way to the living room in hopes of wasting the morning watching cartoons. As she turned the corner, Lizzie was shocked by what she saw. Matt, Melina, and Lanny were all sitting on the couch. Each had a book in hand and were intensely reading them, while pieces of paper were spread across the coffee table with notes scribbled on them. Rejected pieces of paper were crumpled up and discarded on the floor.
Lizzie approached the three with no intention of letting them ruin her plans. "Move over dog breath," Lizzie barked at her little brother. She then pushed him closer to Melina giving her enough space to join the trio on the couch.
"Hey we were watching that," Matt exclaimed as his sister changed the channel on the TV.
"YOU were watching CNN?" she coldly asked.
"Yes we were," Matt replied matter-of-factly. "Now give me that." Matt reached for the remote in his sisters hands, but Lizzie was to fast. Before he could grab it she quickly placed it under the seat cushion of the couch.
"Oh, and I bet you were so intensely studding dads old collage textbooks," Lizzie sarcastically replied as she tried to block Matt from getting the remote.
Matt tried to get around his sister so that he could continue watching tv, but it soon became apparent that he was outmatched. "MOM," Matt yelled knowing that a ruling from his parents would be in his favor.
Lizzie grabbed the collar of Matt's shirt and pulled his face close to hers. "Nice try, but to bad mom and dad aren't here dirk."
Matt pulled back as Lizzie let go of his shirt. "And you called me dog breath," Matt replied as he pretended like he was going to gag. Half way through his act, Matt felt his sisters shove him to the ground in retaliation.
"Lizzie, Matt, what is going on."
Lizzie's momentary joy of beating her brother quickly ended as she looked up to see both of her parents standing in the hallway. Quickly Lizzie searched for an excuse to try and get her parents on her side. It would be tricky, she knew, but it just needed a little finesse.
"We were watching TV and Lizzie came in and changed the channel," Matt yelled.
"So much for finesse," Lizzie thought. Before her brother could captivate her parents with his side of the story, Lizzie interjected. "They were watching CNN, and they weren't even paying attention to it. They were playing with dad's old textbooks."
"My books," Sam replied as he began removing them from harms way.
"We need those," Matt whined. "How else are we going to plan our next prank."
"Oh really, you know Calculus?" Jo questioned her son.
"Not really," Matt said timidly. "Lanny is the Calculus man, Melina is great at Physics, and I just work with electrical circuits."
"Ok, so what is the derivative of x cubed?" Sam questioned the group.
."Dad, that's so easy even I know that the answer is three x squared." Matt replied looking insulted.
"Didn't you fail Calculus your first try?" Jo whispered into her stunned husbands ear.
Slowly Sam recovered from the shock of seeing his son doing Calculus and put together a semi-coherent sentence. "Well, ah, you kids, ah, keep up the good work, and feel free to, ah, use as many of my, ah textbooks as you, ah want." He placed the books on the coffee table, where they were quickly snatched up by the trio. Slowly Mr. McGuire stepped back beside his wife still trying to fully comprehend the situation.
"Now Lizzie," her mother broke in, "you know the rules. Whoever has the TV first gets to choose the channel." Her voice was soft, but authoritative. Lizzie knew she had no chance of arguing, but then when has that ever stopped her.
"But mom.."
"Thank you," Matt said as he reached under Lizzie's cushion and removed the remote control. He smiled in delight of winning the battle as he punched in the numbers and changed the channel back to CNN.
"BUT MOM," Lizzie tried again a little louder, "not a single one of them was paying any attention to what was on."
"Say, why are you watching CNN anyways?" Sam asked, returning to his old self again.
"Oh, we use that to come up with ideas," Melina said without ever looking up from her Physics book.
"Yea," Matt added, "we hear things on the news that spark an idea for a prank. Like there is supposed to be this special on a girl who totally humiliated herself in front of her school. Should be worth a look"
"You actually believe them?" Lizzie questioned her parents. "Last year Matt needed a monkey to do his math homework, now you think he knows Calculous?"
"That's enough Lizzie," her mom scolded.
"NO IT NOT," Lizzie snapped back, as she broke out into a yelling fit. "Don't you see what's going on here? A couple of months ago these three were annoying, but normal. Now, thanks to Mr. Dig, they are turning into pocket protector wearing little NERDS like dad."
Lizzie felt better the moment she was through. She did not know why she had gone off like that, just that with everything else going on she figured she just needed to vent. As quick as the relief of letting off some steam, the seriousness of the situation crashed down upon her. There were few things that she could not say or do, one of the biggest was call her dad a nerd.
"Listen here young lady," her dad waved his finger at her while he scolded, "I don't know what exactly has been keeping you in such a bad mood lately, but that gives you no right to talk to me like that. Some day, all those kids you called nerds are going to rise up and...."
"It's on," Matt shouted inadvertently saving his sister.
Everyone, including Sam, instinctively turned their attention to the TV.
"Well she is back," the anchor announced. "Many of you might remember this video we showed you last spring." The entire McGuire family went silent as the video of Lizzie falling during her junior high graduation ceremony came on the screen.
"They're still showing this?" Lizzie moaned with embarrassment.
"Looks like that wasn't enough for this little blond haired girl," the anchor continued while Lizzie watched in fear of what was about to come. "Yesterday we received this tape of her at a recent school play." Tears began flowing down Lizzie's cheek as the events of two nights previous were replayed on the screen.
"I thought you weren't going to send in any more tapes," Melina said quietly to Matt, her face inches away from his. "I thought after the graduation tape I made it clear that you had to speak to me before doing anything."
"I didn't send it in," Matt replied trying hard to hide his fear.
"MATT," Jo yelled. Although Matt and Melina's conversation was quiet and had gone unnoticed by everyone else in the room, Jo had overheard the conversation. Quickly she moved into position to punish her youngest child. "You were the one that sent in Lizzie's graduation tape."
"WHAT!" Lizzie yelled. "I AM GOING TO CRUSH YOU, YOU LITTLE WEASEL!" Lizzie ran across the room towards her soon to be dead little brother. Before she could reach Matt, Jo stepped in the way. "LET ME AT HIM," Lizzie demanded as she tried to push her way around her mother.
"Lizzie, go to your room," Mrs. McGuire demanded.
"But mom..."
"NOW!"
"UH," Lizzie yelled as she conceded to her mothers demand.
"Lanny, Melina," Jo continued, "I think you two need to leave."
"Ah, sure thing Mrs. McGuire," Melina said as she and Lanny grabbed the papers they were working on and headed home.
"Now Matt," his mother began. Matt mentally made himself ready for the ensuing lecture from his mother. As he expected the lecture continued on for what seemed to be hours. Words like disappointed and angry occurred frequently, as well as phrases such as treat your sister with respect and self control. As usual, Matt paid no attention to the lecture as he had received so many he could guess his mothers next phrase, a feat he managed once but received an extra weeks grounding. Instead, Matt tried to think of a new prank, the idea of an entire Saturday morning wasted did not sit well with him.
"Two months!" Matt exclaimed after hearing the length of his grounding.
"That's right Matt," his mother replied, "just be glad I decided to not take away your right to prank Mr. Dig. But next time you do anything to your sister that will be the first to go. Do you understand me?"
"Yes ma'am," Matt softly replied.
"Now go to your room."
Slowly Matt climbed the steps towards his new prison. For the next two months this was the only place he would see besides school. As he climbed, Matt thought about the punishment he had been given, as well as the threat or losing his pranking privilege. The moment his foot his the top step an idea flashed into his head, quickly Matt ran into his room and began his preparation for the next week. "At least this morning wasn't a complete waist," he thought as an evil laugh escaped his mouth.
"Two months," Melina gasped when Matt called her later that night, "that's insane."
"Listen, I don't have much time," Matt replied into the phone. "I am not supposed to be using the phone so listen up. I need you to gather all the pranking equipment you have around the house. Buckets, sting, electronics, anything that could be used. Call Lanny and tell him to do the same. Bring all of it with you, and I will meet you Monday before school."
"Why?" Melina demanded.
Matt knew that time was against him. If he was caught using the phone he would be adding at least another week to he punishment. But when questioned by Melina it was always best to give in and tell her rather than trying to convince her to trust you. "Ok, here it goes," Matt began. "I was thinking about what my mom said when she grounded me......"
Unknown to Matt, Melina was not the only person he was revealing his plan to that night. Outside his door Lizzie was standing, poised to enter. Originally she was intending on reminding Matt of her superiority, but as she approached and overheard the conversation a new plan formed in her head.
The next Monday Matt, Melina and Lanny arrived outside of Main Street School. "Did you bring your stuff?" Matt asked as he approached. Both Lanny and Melina stepped aside to reveal their contributions to the prank. After Matt added the contents of his backpack, the thee searched the pile for useful items. The pile contained a coupe of buckets, a mop head, about a hundred feet of rope, a few pulleys, the controller to Matt's old RC car, a pair of old speakers, and many other odds and ends.
"Ok," Matt instructed his team, "just remember to act normally. Lets do this."
The trio re-packed their belongings and headed into the school. The day progressed slowly, and the three soon began pulling items out of their bags and fiddling with them. At one point Matt was brave enough to approach Mr. Dig.
"You wouldn't happen to have a nine volt battery would you?" he asked holding the controller to his RC car.
Mr. Dig leaned down on his desk so that his elbows were supporting his upper body. "Now that wouldn't be for me would it Mr. McGuire?" he asked pointing to the controller.
"No," Matt replied. "What would give you that idea?"
Mr. Dig sat down in his chair and fumbled through one of its drawers. After a few seconds he pulled a nine volt battery from the drawer and placed it on the desk for Matt.
"Thanks," Matt replied as he picked up the battery and turned to head back to his desk.
"Mr. McGuire," Mr. Dig called in a voice lacking of any emotions. Matt slowly turned around. "I have heard you are running out of ideas for new pranks."
Matt approached the desk, "Where did you hear that from?" he asked, his voice also lacking emotion. He knew that Mr. Dig was trying to interrogate Matt and get some information from him. He had done this before, and Matt soon found that he was equally able to read Mr. Dig's expressions and learn some information himself. This was the moment he had hoped for, the moment he needed to make the prank reach it's potential.
"Let just say that there is someone that doesn't like you very much."
Matt let out a little snicker before replying. "Well since that could be any number of people, let me assure you that they are wrong. This week we have the ultimate prank set up. And you know the best part is, is that you will never know when it is done."
Mr. Dig remained silent in his chair searching Matts face for information.
"It may already be done," Matt continued before returning to his seat, "or it may not." Matt smiled as he took his seat and started the day's assignment.
For the next few days Matt, Melina, and Lanny continued working on their big prank. Each day they slipped into the classroom before school and during lunch, each day their contraption above the ceiling tiles and hidden behind the bookcases grew larger and more complex, and each day Mr. Dig kept a close eye on each of them, and nightly examined the progress of their contraption.
Although Mr. Dig was keeping a close eye on the three students, Matt was also keeping a close eye on him. A few times each day one of the three would approach Mr. Dig and have a conversation similar to the one he between himself and Matt on Monday. The three would also take turns approaching Mr. Dig an a way that would indicate they were going to prank him. As Matt kept watch, Mr. Dig became more and more paranoid that he was about to be pranked. By Thursday afternoon it had become so bad than any unusual sound or if someone approached him fro behind, he would nearly scream.
"I think that's good enough," Matt whispered to Melina. "We do it tomorrow, bring the balloons."
The next day the three continued their tactics and Mr. Dig had become so paranoid that he refused to sit in his desk. After lunch, instead of enjoying their recess, the three snuck into the room and hid in some cabinets behind Mr. Dig's desk. There they waited until he returned from recess.
As the class returned for outside, Mr. Dig was giving instructions to the class. "Ok everybody," he started, "some of you have a note card on your desk. Just leave it face down for the moment."
As he spoke, Matt, Melina, and Lanny emerged from hiding, each with a balloon and a needle. Slowly they crept closer to their teacher until they were within inches of him. BANG!!!! The noise of three punctured balloons filled the room like a gunshot.
"AAAAAHHHHHH," Mr. Dig yelled as he jumped into the air. Almost instinctively he landed and threw himself under his desk. As he did laughter filled the room followed shortly by cheers and applause.
"Thank you, thank you," Matt addressed the class. "This just shows that it may take a while, but Melina, Lanny, and I will never be out pranked." He then grabbed a hand from each of his co-conspirators and the three gave a final bow.
"But all that stuff?" Mr. Dig questioned as he slowly made his way out from under his desk.
"Just a ruse," Matt happily explained. "We knew that you would be watching us, so we decided to give you something to watch."
"We knew that if we could keep you confused with all of our stuff," Melina continued, "you would never know what was going to happen, and thus paranoia would set it."
"Well very good. Class lets give these three another round of applause." The class rose to their feet as the cheers grew louder once again. Slowly the trio made their way to the back of the class stopping to give many high fives and hand shakes to their classmates along the way.
"Settle down people," Mr. Dig requested once the trio had taken their seats. "Now today we will start studying poetry." The entire class moaned at the news of yet another poetry lesson. "Ah I know that feeling. But I think you will find this first one quite enjoyable. Miss Hunter would you please stand and recite the poem on your note card."
Kathryn Hunter stood up and began reading the word on her card.
Now here is a story I have been meaning to tell,
of three little students you know so well.
They tried every day of every week,
for pranking the teacher was the goal they did seek
Every week he would shoot them down,
that was until week number nine came to town.
Finally an idea they knew had to work,
unfortunately for them, their teacher was a jerk.
He yelled and jumped like a trained baboon,
but deep down he was sad for the loss of their balloon.
The class erupted into laughter as she finished the poem. At the bottom of the note was a deflated balloon. Kathryn removed the balloon and threw it at Matt.
"You knew," Matt exclaimed, "How?"
"It wasn't that hard," Mr. Dig explained. "Like you said, I was watching you three very closely. Now class back to our lesson."
Matt paid no attention to the rest of the class, but rather tried to think of how his perfect plan went wrong. As the lesson progressed, he noticed that he had not been called on to read the note card on his desk. Discreetly he turned the card over and began reading the back.
Brilliant plan, but still not good enough. By the way, did you happen
to see your sister on CNN last Saturday? I bet she would be really
angry at whoever sent that in. Please send her my condolence.
"Lizzie," Matt growled. Melina looked over to see what he was talking about. "It was Lizzie who sold us out."
As the day progressed Matt's thoughts shifted from what had gone wrong to formulating a new plan for the following week. As he thought, Matt walked to the book case behind him. Slowly he looked over the words of each book, but none seemed like they would be of any use.
One book near the bottom finally did catch his eye, not because it was of any use, but because of its name, "THE BOOK FOR THOSE WHO WANT TO SEE AND HEAR." Using his instincts, Matt never reached for the book, but he removed the one beside it. At he removed the book, he caught the edge of the strange book. Instead of just the cover moving, the entire book moved. As naturally as he could, Matt skimmed through the book he removed, replaced it, and returned to his seat.
Still trying to act as normal as possible, Matt took a spare piece of paper wrote a note on it and passed it to Melina.
Do not let anyone else see this. Do not throw it away until you get
home. He didn't need Lizzie, he would have found out anyways. Meet
me at the park tonight after dinner, bring Lanny.