Author: GateSeeker2
Disclaimer: All necessary information is listed prior to Part 1
"Waiting for the Dawn" - Part 4
After watching Cassie drive off down the street, Sam stood on the front porch for a few minutes tightly hugging herself and thinking about what she should do. She could tell that Cassie was driving frantically and prayed that she would make it safely to the Colonel's house. She just knew that was where Cassie was headed. Cassie had clearly implied it with her "what do ya think" comment. Sam decided to wait a while then call the Colonel and check on Cassie. How was she going to handle this situation with Cassie? Cassie looked so hurt and betrayed. How did Janet handle being a parent? Sam would rather be low on ammunition while facing a battalion of Jaffa than face an angry and hurt Cassie again.
Sam knew how it felt to lose a mother. Her mother died when Sam was just thirteen. This was a bond that had always united her and Cassie. Of course, this was the second mom that Cassie had lost at the hands of the Goa'uld: first her biological mom and now her adoptive mom. Sam felt so helpless right now, and she shivered as she remembered the look of betrayal on Cassie's face.
This morning's argument with Cassie and her hurried departure reminded Sam of her own youth. After Sam's mother died, there had been many times when she had seen her brother Mark and her dad argue and go round and round, more often than not about nothing of importance. However, their biggest and ever constant argument always focused on her mother's death. She remembered how Mark had sworn to never forgive her dad for failing to pick their mother up from the airport which had lead to their mom being killed in the taxi cab accident. Mark had felt betrayed by his father's apparent lack of commitment to their mom. It had literally taken years for Mark and her dad to try and heal their relationship, and after many years and some much belated yet concentrated effort on both of their parts as well as some persistent urging from Selmac, it was still a fragile relationship at best. Still, too many of their arguments when she was younger started over petty and inconsequential things. Many times the confrontations simply originated from misunderstandings, but later Mark knew exactly how to push the right buttons to set her dad off. So, what exactly was it that was setting Cassie off?
After pondering this question for a while, Sam soon decided that standing in the crisp Colorado morning air with a wet head and bare feet was a foolish thing to be doing. She turned and walked quietly back into her warm home and headed for the kitchen to make herself a cup of coffee. As Sam approached the kitchen, she was startled to see Pete putting his breakfast dishes in the dishwasher. In the midst of all the chaos and yelling, she had actually forgotten that he was there. She had become so focused on the teenager and her implications that she had forgotten that her boyfriend was in the house. Sam instantly cringed inwardly when she thought the word "boyfriend." She had never really liked that word even as – especially as – a teenager. Now it just seemed pathetic to her, particularly after Cassie kept grilling her about that very subject, but she supposed that was what he was. Besides, she didn't want to call him her lover.
Pete saw Sam come into the kitchen and looked up at her as he was just finishing cleaning up the dishes and cookware, but leaving one plate on the counter top. He had fixed her a plate of bacon, eggs, and toast. He noticed how she was just staring at him now, yet she had seemed to be somewhat surprised when she had entered the kitchen.
"Want some coffee?" Pete asked.
"Uh...Yeah...Thanks." She said as she took the mug that he had just poured for her.
"I fixed you a plate in case you're hungry. You can reheat it in the microwave when you're ready." Sam just nodded in response and Pete continued, "So?"
"So?" Sam replied neutrally. Not wanting to meet Pete's gaze yet, her eyes were fixed on the dark liquid. Sam sat down on one of her bar stools as she began to sip the hot coffee. The mug was warm. Her hands were holding it firmly trying to absorb its heat. She took a few hesitant sips of the dark brew. The coffee was sliding soothingly down her throat as she was closing her eyes. She was reveling in the warmth and relief that she was receiving. It was as if a strong familiar arm was wrapping around her telling her to "come here" and giving her a reassuring hug to share her burden and ease her weary soul. She thought it odd that she was taking more comfort from this cup of coffee than she was willing to allow herself to accept from Pete.
Pete waited a few seconds for Sam to speak and explain what all had just taken place. When she didn't offer any explanation, he wiped the counter top one last time and tossed the kitchen towel down on the counter then began to question her with his acute police skills. "Sam, what was all that about?"
"What do you mean?" Sam thought she'd try the evasive approach first. She knew exactly what he wanted to know, but she wasn't ready to go there yet.
With a sing song insistence, Pete said her name, "Sam. Why was she so upset?"
"Pete. Her mom was just killed."
"Duh! I know THAT Sam. I mean why was she so upset about finding ME here?"
"Well..." Sam was trying to stall, but knew that she couldn't. "I guess she was... just...surprised."
"No, I think there was more than that."
"Pete. I had no idea that you were going to come into town last night. She had already gone to bed, so she didn't expect anyone but her and me to be here this morning. OK?" Sam had started picking at the bacon that was now cooling on the plate.
"No Sam!" He banged his left fist on the counter top thereby startling Sam. "It's NOT OK! Why didn't she know about MEEEEE?" Pete inquired as he drew out the last word while pointing with his right finger towards his chest. He waited a moment then blew out a deep breath. Standing directly opposite Sam with both of his palms now resting flat on the kitchen counter, he continued to press the issue. "And, I don't mean about me coming into town. I'm talking about US seeing each other."
"I'm not in the mood for this Pete. I just..." She went to stand.
"Well, TOO BAD, I am." Persisting, Pete's volume rose, "You didn't tell her about ME did you?"
Sam sighed heavily and placed the reassuring mug down on the counter. She had just had an argument with Cassie, and she didn't want to have another argument just now. Plus, was it just her or did it seem as if she and Pete were having a lot of arguments lately? Looking squarely at him, she said, "Other than SG1 and General Hammond, I hadn't really told ANYONE about you."
Pete was stunned and bewildered and was standing there with his mouth gaping. His ego was feeling a bit bruised. "Why not Sam? Are you ashamed of me? Of our relationship?" His voice was now quickly sounding whining like a small child not getting his way.
"Pete." It came out as a breathy exhausted sigh. Resting her left hand on her cocked hip at the same time while using her right ring finger to lightly scratch between her eye brows, she paused and promptly thought how every time that she said, "Pete," during this conversation his name sounded heavy and debilitating. "Stop OK. This is NOT about you, OR us right now. It's about Cassie." Sam was now standing by the stool and looking at the counter and circling the edge of her coffee mug with her right thumb. "Besides, I just told you," Sam continued, "I didn't know that you were coming into town last night. She was just shocked to see a man that she didn't know in my kitchen."
"Uh huh." Pete nodded, crossed his arms, widened his stance and suspected, "Well, would she have been as shocked if it had been a man she DID know?"
Looking straight at Pete meeting his gaze unwaveringly, Sam spat heatedly, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Sam, Casey is ..."
"Cassie!" Sam corrected.
"Whatever!" He waved his hands wildly about in the air. "She seemed to make it quite clear that there IS, or WAS, someone ELSE!" Pete questioned as he punctuated the last two words by poking fiercely at the counter three times with his right index finger.
"How dare you!" She snapped quickly throwing her own arms into the air. "I can't believe that you think..." Sam tried to begin but was abruptly interrupted.
"Sam! Is there someone else? Are you just using me?" Pete was getting quite mad now.
"No Pete! I'm not seeing anyone else." Sam was irritated that she would have to defend herself to him. "But, I'm not going to deal with this now. I need to make sure that Cassie is alright." Sam moved away from the bar stool to reach for the phone at the end of the counter when Pete reached across the counter and grabbed her wrist firmly. His action slightly alarmed Sam.
"Would you tell me if there was?" Pete knew that she kept secrets for living. It would be easy for her to keep secrets in her private life too. But, he thought they had already discussed the importance of openness and honesty in a relationship, even though he still hadn't told her about his little FBI assisted back ground check on her that he coincidentally ran the morning after having just been intimate with her for the first time. However, Pete Shanahan was NOT about to be used as a rebound relationship. Although he had been quite excited about surprising Sam last night, she had appeared apprehensive about letting him in to her house – or was it her life? They hadn't really been able to talk much during this last week, but he did know that she had lost a close friend this week while "off world" on a mission. Man, he didn't think he'd ever get used to that phrase – "off world" – even though he now knew exactly what Sam did for a living. He had thought that coming down to visit her would help somehow. He thought that she would want him to be sensitive and help her through her grief. But she seemed distant to his actions. It was apparent that after Sam had explained to him about the teenage girl staying in the house that anything more intimate was out of the question. Nevertheless, Pete wanted to try and be supportive but was disappointed when she had refused to even briefly cuddle last night. For most of the night, she had practically hugged her pillow and her side of the bed clearly not wanting him to touch her. Pete was just glad that she hadn't made him sleep on the couch. That would have just been humiliating. But now, he wondered if she still wanted him, or someone else.
Sam looked momentarily in Pete's eyes before subtlety shaking off Pete's hand. Why was it that Pete seemed to have a problem with trust – trusting her. She was getting tired of this. "Pete. There's nothing to tell." Not now, maybe not ever.
Pete considered himself a good detective. He studied people's behavior and listened carefully to the words they chose to use. He couldn't help but notice that she hadn't really told him, "Yes" or "No." She cleverly avoided any real answer.
Sam picked up the cordless phone and walked into the study as she began dialing the Colonel's number. She shut the sliding doors and waited for the Colonel to answer.
To Be Continued...
NOTE: If you liked it, or if you didn't like it, please let me know. Thanks for reading.
Disclaimer: All necessary information is listed prior to Part 1
"Waiting for the Dawn" - Part 4
After watching Cassie drive off down the street, Sam stood on the front porch for a few minutes tightly hugging herself and thinking about what she should do. She could tell that Cassie was driving frantically and prayed that she would make it safely to the Colonel's house. She just knew that was where Cassie was headed. Cassie had clearly implied it with her "what do ya think" comment. Sam decided to wait a while then call the Colonel and check on Cassie. How was she going to handle this situation with Cassie? Cassie looked so hurt and betrayed. How did Janet handle being a parent? Sam would rather be low on ammunition while facing a battalion of Jaffa than face an angry and hurt Cassie again.
Sam knew how it felt to lose a mother. Her mother died when Sam was just thirteen. This was a bond that had always united her and Cassie. Of course, this was the second mom that Cassie had lost at the hands of the Goa'uld: first her biological mom and now her adoptive mom. Sam felt so helpless right now, and she shivered as she remembered the look of betrayal on Cassie's face.
This morning's argument with Cassie and her hurried departure reminded Sam of her own youth. After Sam's mother died, there had been many times when she had seen her brother Mark and her dad argue and go round and round, more often than not about nothing of importance. However, their biggest and ever constant argument always focused on her mother's death. She remembered how Mark had sworn to never forgive her dad for failing to pick their mother up from the airport which had lead to their mom being killed in the taxi cab accident. Mark had felt betrayed by his father's apparent lack of commitment to their mom. It had literally taken years for Mark and her dad to try and heal their relationship, and after many years and some much belated yet concentrated effort on both of their parts as well as some persistent urging from Selmac, it was still a fragile relationship at best. Still, too many of their arguments when she was younger started over petty and inconsequential things. Many times the confrontations simply originated from misunderstandings, but later Mark knew exactly how to push the right buttons to set her dad off. So, what exactly was it that was setting Cassie off?
After pondering this question for a while, Sam soon decided that standing in the crisp Colorado morning air with a wet head and bare feet was a foolish thing to be doing. She turned and walked quietly back into her warm home and headed for the kitchen to make herself a cup of coffee. As Sam approached the kitchen, she was startled to see Pete putting his breakfast dishes in the dishwasher. In the midst of all the chaos and yelling, she had actually forgotten that he was there. She had become so focused on the teenager and her implications that she had forgotten that her boyfriend was in the house. Sam instantly cringed inwardly when she thought the word "boyfriend." She had never really liked that word even as – especially as – a teenager. Now it just seemed pathetic to her, particularly after Cassie kept grilling her about that very subject, but she supposed that was what he was. Besides, she didn't want to call him her lover.
Pete saw Sam come into the kitchen and looked up at her as he was just finishing cleaning up the dishes and cookware, but leaving one plate on the counter top. He had fixed her a plate of bacon, eggs, and toast. He noticed how she was just staring at him now, yet she had seemed to be somewhat surprised when she had entered the kitchen.
"Want some coffee?" Pete asked.
"Uh...Yeah...Thanks." She said as she took the mug that he had just poured for her.
"I fixed you a plate in case you're hungry. You can reheat it in the microwave when you're ready." Sam just nodded in response and Pete continued, "So?"
"So?" Sam replied neutrally. Not wanting to meet Pete's gaze yet, her eyes were fixed on the dark liquid. Sam sat down on one of her bar stools as she began to sip the hot coffee. The mug was warm. Her hands were holding it firmly trying to absorb its heat. She took a few hesitant sips of the dark brew. The coffee was sliding soothingly down her throat as she was closing her eyes. She was reveling in the warmth and relief that she was receiving. It was as if a strong familiar arm was wrapping around her telling her to "come here" and giving her a reassuring hug to share her burden and ease her weary soul. She thought it odd that she was taking more comfort from this cup of coffee than she was willing to allow herself to accept from Pete.
Pete waited a few seconds for Sam to speak and explain what all had just taken place. When she didn't offer any explanation, he wiped the counter top one last time and tossed the kitchen towel down on the counter then began to question her with his acute police skills. "Sam, what was all that about?"
"What do you mean?" Sam thought she'd try the evasive approach first. She knew exactly what he wanted to know, but she wasn't ready to go there yet.
With a sing song insistence, Pete said her name, "Sam. Why was she so upset?"
"Pete. Her mom was just killed."
"Duh! I know THAT Sam. I mean why was she so upset about finding ME here?"
"Well..." Sam was trying to stall, but knew that she couldn't. "I guess she was... just...surprised."
"No, I think there was more than that."
"Pete. I had no idea that you were going to come into town last night. She had already gone to bed, so she didn't expect anyone but her and me to be here this morning. OK?" Sam had started picking at the bacon that was now cooling on the plate.
"No Sam!" He banged his left fist on the counter top thereby startling Sam. "It's NOT OK! Why didn't she know about MEEEEE?" Pete inquired as he drew out the last word while pointing with his right finger towards his chest. He waited a moment then blew out a deep breath. Standing directly opposite Sam with both of his palms now resting flat on the kitchen counter, he continued to press the issue. "And, I don't mean about me coming into town. I'm talking about US seeing each other."
"I'm not in the mood for this Pete. I just..." She went to stand.
"Well, TOO BAD, I am." Persisting, Pete's volume rose, "You didn't tell her about ME did you?"
Sam sighed heavily and placed the reassuring mug down on the counter. She had just had an argument with Cassie, and she didn't want to have another argument just now. Plus, was it just her or did it seem as if she and Pete were having a lot of arguments lately? Looking squarely at him, she said, "Other than SG1 and General Hammond, I hadn't really told ANYONE about you."
Pete was stunned and bewildered and was standing there with his mouth gaping. His ego was feeling a bit bruised. "Why not Sam? Are you ashamed of me? Of our relationship?" His voice was now quickly sounding whining like a small child not getting his way.
"Pete." It came out as a breathy exhausted sigh. Resting her left hand on her cocked hip at the same time while using her right ring finger to lightly scratch between her eye brows, she paused and promptly thought how every time that she said, "Pete," during this conversation his name sounded heavy and debilitating. "Stop OK. This is NOT about you, OR us right now. It's about Cassie." Sam was now standing by the stool and looking at the counter and circling the edge of her coffee mug with her right thumb. "Besides, I just told you," Sam continued, "I didn't know that you were coming into town last night. She was just shocked to see a man that she didn't know in my kitchen."
"Uh huh." Pete nodded, crossed his arms, widened his stance and suspected, "Well, would she have been as shocked if it had been a man she DID know?"
Looking straight at Pete meeting his gaze unwaveringly, Sam spat heatedly, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Sam, Casey is ..."
"Cassie!" Sam corrected.
"Whatever!" He waved his hands wildly about in the air. "She seemed to make it quite clear that there IS, or WAS, someone ELSE!" Pete questioned as he punctuated the last two words by poking fiercely at the counter three times with his right index finger.
"How dare you!" She snapped quickly throwing her own arms into the air. "I can't believe that you think..." Sam tried to begin but was abruptly interrupted.
"Sam! Is there someone else? Are you just using me?" Pete was getting quite mad now.
"No Pete! I'm not seeing anyone else." Sam was irritated that she would have to defend herself to him. "But, I'm not going to deal with this now. I need to make sure that Cassie is alright." Sam moved away from the bar stool to reach for the phone at the end of the counter when Pete reached across the counter and grabbed her wrist firmly. His action slightly alarmed Sam.
"Would you tell me if there was?" Pete knew that she kept secrets for living. It would be easy for her to keep secrets in her private life too. But, he thought they had already discussed the importance of openness and honesty in a relationship, even though he still hadn't told her about his little FBI assisted back ground check on her that he coincidentally ran the morning after having just been intimate with her for the first time. However, Pete Shanahan was NOT about to be used as a rebound relationship. Although he had been quite excited about surprising Sam last night, she had appeared apprehensive about letting him in to her house – or was it her life? They hadn't really been able to talk much during this last week, but he did know that she had lost a close friend this week while "off world" on a mission. Man, he didn't think he'd ever get used to that phrase – "off world" – even though he now knew exactly what Sam did for a living. He had thought that coming down to visit her would help somehow. He thought that she would want him to be sensitive and help her through her grief. But she seemed distant to his actions. It was apparent that after Sam had explained to him about the teenage girl staying in the house that anything more intimate was out of the question. Nevertheless, Pete wanted to try and be supportive but was disappointed when she had refused to even briefly cuddle last night. For most of the night, she had practically hugged her pillow and her side of the bed clearly not wanting him to touch her. Pete was just glad that she hadn't made him sleep on the couch. That would have just been humiliating. But now, he wondered if she still wanted him, or someone else.
Sam looked momentarily in Pete's eyes before subtlety shaking off Pete's hand. Why was it that Pete seemed to have a problem with trust – trusting her. She was getting tired of this. "Pete. There's nothing to tell." Not now, maybe not ever.
Pete considered himself a good detective. He studied people's behavior and listened carefully to the words they chose to use. He couldn't help but notice that she hadn't really told him, "Yes" or "No." She cleverly avoided any real answer.
Sam picked up the cordless phone and walked into the study as she began dialing the Colonel's number. She shut the sliding doors and waited for the Colonel to answer.
To Be Continued...
NOTE: If you liked it, or if you didn't like it, please let me know. Thanks for reading.