Disclaimer: Yeah. Don't own anything useful.
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Reviewer Replies - Okkay, sorry, I forgot to post the replies. Here they are.
*Ariennye: Jones therapy? AHHHHH! Keep reading.
*mzsnaz: Hmm... I rather liked the rock thing myself. Here's more!
*Alania: Yeah, he should use the Silver picture. Maybe next chapter, though. This one's kind of already written, sorry. Yeah, more pleasant than a human being... lizards are pretty logcal. ANYway... keep reading.
*sunny-historian: Thank you, thank you. *Bows.* No, really, thank you for the kind comments. Okay, that was weird. Glad you liked it. Read on.
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LIZARDS OUTSIDE THE BUN
Chapter Six ~~~ Fred Wreaks Havoc
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"Guess what," Sulu told Chekov as the Russian sat down for the beginning of his shift. "Roberts is no longer in the contest."
"Really? Vhy?" Chekov said, interested. He was amazed that someone had actually been disqualified. It wasn't that hard to take care of a lizard.
"Fred escaped," Sulu reported.
"Ouch."
"And the worst part is, nobody's found him yet."
Chekov smiled. "Bit of a problem for Roberts, then. But... Wait a minute. There's a lizard loose on the ship?"
Sulu nodded.
"Ve haff to find him. I've started to like these lizards, despite that salary gone down the toilet."
"Okay..."
They said nothing for a few minutes, then Chekov remembered exactly what he had been talking about. "But ve haff to find Fred!"
"Well, Roberts is already trying to do that, even though he's been disqualified. He's really started to like Fred. It's like this contest has taken over our lives."
"Our? Your, maybe."
"Okay, mine. But Roberts is trying to-"
Sulu was interrupted as the doors swished open and Roberts hurtled out. "Captain sir!" he gasped. "I can't find Fred. Tell me you've seen him, please, I know I've been disqualified but my little Fred... Sir."
"Um..." Kirk was somewhat taken aback by this show of emotion. "I... haven't see your... little Fred."
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Actually, Fred was in Engineering. There were a lot of cables and plastic things there that looked, well, yummy. His little lizard brain was thinking of food at the moment, and there was something about red plastic that had always looked appealing. Luckily, the red plastic thing that he bit into was not a cable ready to electrocute the first animal that decided it was a snack. It was simply a delicate strap that held the dilithium crystal in place.
Fred squeaked like a gerbil for two reasons when he sunk his teeth into the plastic. For one, it tasted horrible. Red plastic was no where near as scrumptious as lizard food.
The second reason Fred squeaked was the fact that the dilithium crystal the strap had been supporting suddenly crashed to the floor. It was certainly a bad design for a ship if one lizard could loose the dilithium crystal. But Starfleet was well known by the evil bad guys of the galaxy for having a number of these little things that could easily go wrong and put the ship in jeopardy. Easier for an evil bad guy to take over a ship that way.
The ship was plunged in darkness until the emergency lights came on. With the lights came the red alert klaxon, and the preprogrammed voice that stated, "All hands to battle stations. This is not a drill."
So, in the spirit of red alerts, everyone began to walk a little faster.
Meanwhile, Kirk was frantically pushing the button on his intercom to try to get through to Engineering, but the intercom system hadn't come online yet, and every time he pressed the button he heard an annoying beeping noise and "We are sorry, intership communications are not online yet. We are sorry, intership-"
Spock was attempting to do a scan of the interior of the ship, but as the power was out, he was having some difficulties. Most of his results came up as "We are sorry, intership scanning is not yet a possibility. We are sorry, intership-"
It was unclear exactly WHO was sorry, but in truth it didn't exactly matter. Everyone was rushing around, a few ensigns were hiding under their beds, and Scotty was trying to fix the problem.
Unfortunately, he needed a spare crystal. And to get a spare crystal, he would first have to get the attention of a few engineering red-shirts. But as they were all walking quickly and running as one apparently did in a red- alert-all-personnel-to-battle-stations situation, it was more difficult than it had seemed at first.
Scotty finally managed to grab two red-shirts and pulled them along to the storage place where, incidentally, dilithium crystals were stored. This crystal was kept in a force field, and it was up to the ensigns to open it. Surprisingly, they did this without further problems, and Scotty brought the dilithium crystal to the place where the last one had fallen.
And then he saw the culprit.
Fred, in all the noise and confusion of a red alert, had stayed mostly invisible on the floor near engineering. But now... Scotty did not like intruders in Engineering.
However, he still held the dilithium crystal. He took care to place it perfectly in position, told a red-shirt to strap it in, and ran after Fred.
The lizard was fast, but Scotty was faster. He had caught up to the culprit and was about to deal the last blow that would ever be dealt to Fred, when Roberts charged in.
He had finally made his way to engineering, and he let out an anguished sob as he saw what was about to happen to Fred. Then he charged.
Scotty was knocked backward by the force of the, well, Roberts. A few ensigns had crowded around and were chanting "Fight! Fight!" though it was apparent that chanting was not needed. Roberts was screaming "Murderer! You tried to kill my Fred!" and Scotty was yelling "Yer bloody lizard hurt me ship!"
By the time security got down to Engineering, they were both already unconscious. Roberts had knocked Scotty's head against something hard and someone had stunned Roberts with a phaser.
The security team stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. Where do you take unconscious, recently-brawling officers? Sickbay or the brig?
Ensign Silver, who had assigned to the security team, was the first to make the decision. "Bring them to Sickbay," she said. "It's the logical course of action."
Everyone groaned at Silver's newfound Vulcan-ness, and those who had been hugged earlier made sure that their groans were the loudest.
Fred scurried off into a vent.
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Ooh, I'm sorry, short chapter. But if you review, more will come soon. Free lizards if you review.
Thank you for flying US Airways. We hope you enjoyed your peanuts, and we would like to be the first to welcome you to Vulcan.
Review, please!n to Fred. it in, an to Fred. it in, a
*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*
Reviewer Replies - Okkay, sorry, I forgot to post the replies. Here they are.
*Ariennye: Jones therapy? AHHHHH! Keep reading.
*mzsnaz: Hmm... I rather liked the rock thing myself. Here's more!
*Alania: Yeah, he should use the Silver picture. Maybe next chapter, though. This one's kind of already written, sorry. Yeah, more pleasant than a human being... lizards are pretty logcal. ANYway... keep reading.
*sunny-historian: Thank you, thank you. *Bows.* No, really, thank you for the kind comments. Okay, that was weird. Glad you liked it. Read on.
*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*
LIZARDS OUTSIDE THE BUN
Chapter Six ~~~ Fred Wreaks Havoc
*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*
"Guess what," Sulu told Chekov as the Russian sat down for the beginning of his shift. "Roberts is no longer in the contest."
"Really? Vhy?" Chekov said, interested. He was amazed that someone had actually been disqualified. It wasn't that hard to take care of a lizard.
"Fred escaped," Sulu reported.
"Ouch."
"And the worst part is, nobody's found him yet."
Chekov smiled. "Bit of a problem for Roberts, then. But... Wait a minute. There's a lizard loose on the ship?"
Sulu nodded.
"Ve haff to find him. I've started to like these lizards, despite that salary gone down the toilet."
"Okay..."
They said nothing for a few minutes, then Chekov remembered exactly what he had been talking about. "But ve haff to find Fred!"
"Well, Roberts is already trying to do that, even though he's been disqualified. He's really started to like Fred. It's like this contest has taken over our lives."
"Our? Your, maybe."
"Okay, mine. But Roberts is trying to-"
Sulu was interrupted as the doors swished open and Roberts hurtled out. "Captain sir!" he gasped. "I can't find Fred. Tell me you've seen him, please, I know I've been disqualified but my little Fred... Sir."
"Um..." Kirk was somewhat taken aback by this show of emotion. "I... haven't see your... little Fred."
*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*
Actually, Fred was in Engineering. There were a lot of cables and plastic things there that looked, well, yummy. His little lizard brain was thinking of food at the moment, and there was something about red plastic that had always looked appealing. Luckily, the red plastic thing that he bit into was not a cable ready to electrocute the first animal that decided it was a snack. It was simply a delicate strap that held the dilithium crystal in place.
Fred squeaked like a gerbil for two reasons when he sunk his teeth into the plastic. For one, it tasted horrible. Red plastic was no where near as scrumptious as lizard food.
The second reason Fred squeaked was the fact that the dilithium crystal the strap had been supporting suddenly crashed to the floor. It was certainly a bad design for a ship if one lizard could loose the dilithium crystal. But Starfleet was well known by the evil bad guys of the galaxy for having a number of these little things that could easily go wrong and put the ship in jeopardy. Easier for an evil bad guy to take over a ship that way.
The ship was plunged in darkness until the emergency lights came on. With the lights came the red alert klaxon, and the preprogrammed voice that stated, "All hands to battle stations. This is not a drill."
So, in the spirit of red alerts, everyone began to walk a little faster.
Meanwhile, Kirk was frantically pushing the button on his intercom to try to get through to Engineering, but the intercom system hadn't come online yet, and every time he pressed the button he heard an annoying beeping noise and "We are sorry, intership communications are not online yet. We are sorry, intership-"
Spock was attempting to do a scan of the interior of the ship, but as the power was out, he was having some difficulties. Most of his results came up as "We are sorry, intership scanning is not yet a possibility. We are sorry, intership-"
It was unclear exactly WHO was sorry, but in truth it didn't exactly matter. Everyone was rushing around, a few ensigns were hiding under their beds, and Scotty was trying to fix the problem.
Unfortunately, he needed a spare crystal. And to get a spare crystal, he would first have to get the attention of a few engineering red-shirts. But as they were all walking quickly and running as one apparently did in a red- alert-all-personnel-to-battle-stations situation, it was more difficult than it had seemed at first.
Scotty finally managed to grab two red-shirts and pulled them along to the storage place where, incidentally, dilithium crystals were stored. This crystal was kept in a force field, and it was up to the ensigns to open it. Surprisingly, they did this without further problems, and Scotty brought the dilithium crystal to the place where the last one had fallen.
And then he saw the culprit.
Fred, in all the noise and confusion of a red alert, had stayed mostly invisible on the floor near engineering. But now... Scotty did not like intruders in Engineering.
However, he still held the dilithium crystal. He took care to place it perfectly in position, told a red-shirt to strap it in, and ran after Fred.
The lizard was fast, but Scotty was faster. He had caught up to the culprit and was about to deal the last blow that would ever be dealt to Fred, when Roberts charged in.
He had finally made his way to engineering, and he let out an anguished sob as he saw what was about to happen to Fred. Then he charged.
Scotty was knocked backward by the force of the, well, Roberts. A few ensigns had crowded around and were chanting "Fight! Fight!" though it was apparent that chanting was not needed. Roberts was screaming "Murderer! You tried to kill my Fred!" and Scotty was yelling "Yer bloody lizard hurt me ship!"
By the time security got down to Engineering, they were both already unconscious. Roberts had knocked Scotty's head against something hard and someone had stunned Roberts with a phaser.
The security team stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. Where do you take unconscious, recently-brawling officers? Sickbay or the brig?
Ensign Silver, who had assigned to the security team, was the first to make the decision. "Bring them to Sickbay," she said. "It's the logical course of action."
Everyone groaned at Silver's newfound Vulcan-ness, and those who had been hugged earlier made sure that their groans were the loudest.
Fred scurried off into a vent.
*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*
Ooh, I'm sorry, short chapter. But if you review, more will come soon. Free lizards if you review.
Thank you for flying US Airways. We hope you enjoyed your peanuts, and we would like to be the first to welcome you to Vulcan.
Review, please!n to Fred. it in, an to Fred. it in, a