Chapter Eight: Cage

I constantly walked back and forth, wondering what I must do to survive this battle between us. I went downstairs furiously, and turned off the lights in every room in the house. I entered another room, which led to the basement. I'm in the basement, its temperature searching to my whole body. Send thrills down my spine. Something caught my eye, a little wooden chair. I remembered the chair from when I was little. I use to use it all the time, but why is it here? As I came near it, I felt the shape, the movement of the chair. But I as I looked at it, the paint was come off the chair and some of the wood was chipped off. As I was feeling the broken down chair, I was thinking how did I get myself into al this? This struggle that I'm going thru? Now I feel so ridiculous now. What am I supposed to do? Koga over here is stalking me wherever I go.

I turned on the light that was right next to me, and felt something wet on my blouse. It was a tear and I didn't even felt it. But look at me I never felt such pain in my life. I placed my hand where the location of my heart, and felt the intense beating as I hear it talk. Decision...love...heartbreak...hatred...betrayal. Still echoes in my soul and mind. I already know who is my lover, but what decision? What must I chose? Is it between Inuyasha and Koga? Naw, it couldn't be, could it? As I was thinking of my decision, I heard someone come inside the house. I bet it's Koga. Idiot. Doesn't he know that I know what he's thinking. I tried to look for somethin' so I could hit him with, again. I found a baseball bat and red lipstick, just in case if I killed him. I went upstairs and opened the door. And found Kira there straight in my face, her expression showed, "What the hell?" but I didn't paid no mind.

Kira: What up with you, Kagome?

Me: ...

Kira: Well say something!

Me: Koga. Koga he...

Kira: O my god, don't tell me he...

Me: No! Not that! I mean he stalked me all overt tha Bronx!

Kira: Oh. Damn! Fo' what reason exactly?

Me: Jus' to have a piece of ass.

Kira: (Laughing) Are u serious?

Me: What do ya think?! I have a bat here ready to strike you in tha head! And looking like some crazy Indian.

Kira: (laughing) Okay. Let me get you some tea.

Me: Okay.

I went upstairs to my room, and fell down on my knees. Still regretting what I've done. I saw something caught my eye, the steel scissors. I gradually picked it out from its container and examined it like I was a little toddler with a gun. I opened the scissors, and saw the deadly blades reflecting the light in my room. I held it with my right hand, and slowly met it with my left wrists. Flowing rain flowing from my cheeks, and saw the changing color of my red tears collide with the floor, I missed the target. I fell back on my back, and still rain flowing from me. Why can I do this? Nothing can save me, my life is ending anyways, so why can't I do it? I whined.

I woke up from my forgetful dream, but I found out that the dream was real. The blood flooded on the floor, and as I saw my wrist, it is already healed. I went to the bathroom to wash my face. After I put on the water I saw something in the mirror, I saw myself, but it wasn't me. It was somebody else. Then, I saw a figure that was behind her, and realized it was Koga. He gave me a deadly grin that made shivers down my spine. I looked at him in amazement for what I just saw. I couldn't even blink, but when I did, the reflections have vanished. I washed my face from all of my tears that I have wasted, and dried my face with the nearest towel. But the reflection I saw, I couldn't even describe, but I bet no one could either. As I gazed at myself in the mirror, I wonder, I thought curiously, what if this is the real reflection of me, after Koga raped me, but-but this couldn't be! I gazed at myself dreaming by finding that answer. I hated myself for what I've become, of what I have done to myself. I found a piece of the bathroom tile on the floor, and threw it at the mirror. I went back into my room, closed the door, and slid down the wall.

Flashback

"I-I don' t think of you as an unworthy or worthless person. I'm glad to be here with you, but don't beat up yourself because of what he did to you," Inuyasha said lovingly.

End Flashback

As my memory of what Inuyasha said was gone, I got up, and laid at my bed thinking to myself that I shouldn't beat up myself, but I couldn't stop it. Inside, it has a bloodthirsty battle between my joy and misery. Now I feel like that I don't need anybody or trusting anyone, all I need now...is myself.

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