Chapter One:

It was a beautiful fine morning and Harry was having another spaz attack because Sirius Black was dead.

Suddenly, there was a tap at the window. It was the school owl.

"HOOT!"

Harry opened the window, and took the owl inside.

It had a brown envelope with the Hogwarts crest on it.

On the front, it said:

O.W.L.s

Harry, hands shaking, opened the envelope.

Dear Mr. Potter,

Here are you OWL results:

Defense Against the Dark Arts: Practical: T Theory: T

(terrific! Thought Harry)

Transfiguration: Practical: T Theory: T

(amazing! Thought Harry)

Divination: Practical: T Theory: T

Care of Magical Creatures: Practical: T Theory: T

Charms: Practical: T Theory: T

History of Magic: Practical: T Theory: T

Herbology: Practical: T Theory: T

Potions: Practical: D Theory D

(Dreadful... well, I wasn't expecting anything better. At least I got 'terrific' in everything else!)

Harry looked at the bottom of the paper.

D = Distinction

(WHAT?! Thought Harry)

E = Exceeds Expectations

A = Acceptable

P = Poor

T = Terrible

Harry turned over the piece of paper.

Dear Mr. Potter,

You have not fulfilled the requirements of, therefore you will have to retake your OWLs at Christmas. If your results do not improve, you will be held back a year. We welcome you to join potions club, though.

You received a total of one OWL.

Harry was speechless.

Not that he was talking anyway. Well, you know what I mean.

Shut up.

He had got terrible in everything but potions! It should have been the opposite!

Someone had messed with his results!

(Dun dun DUNNNNNNNN)

Either that or he was just really thick.