Thank you to all who reviewed chapter 1 of this fic!!! Glad to see that so
many people are enjoying it so far!!! Anyhow, here's chapter 2. I dunno if
it's as funny as chapter 1. But you can read it anyway, and see what you
think. Keep those reviews comin'!
~
Genie: Hello and welcome to the second edition of "The Untold Hamtaro!"
Cricket: I've still got my eye on you.
Genie: Hey, I wrote you into this fic, and I can take you out too!!! So shut up!!!
Cricket: *shuts up*
Genie: That's more like it. Now on to the story. On this lovely morning Hamtaro was once again on his way to the clubhouse...
Cricket: Oh that sure is a creative start.
Genie: I said shut up!!! *smashes cricket with a pot*
Cricket: Oohhhhoooowwwwwwwwww
Genie: Finally, vengeance is mine! Mwahahahahaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!! A-hem. Sorry. So as I was saying...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
Hamtaro: I'm just a-walkin' along - Hey! What's everyone doing standing around outside???
Boss: Snoozer's still looking for Fluffy. And he'll viciously attack anyone who comes near him. So it's safer out here.
Hamtaro: Haha. You're joking, right? Snoozer isn't vicious...*starts walking into clubhouse*
Boss: Well don't say I didn't warn you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Inside clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Snoozer: My preciousssssssss...it issssss misssssssing...
Hamtaro: Ham-ha Snoozer!
Snoozer: YOU! YOU STOLE MY PRECIOUSSSSSESSSS!!!!!!!
Hamtaro: Actually I -
Snoozer: GIVE ME MY PRECIOUSSSSSSS!!!!! *lunges at Hamtaro*
Hamtaro: AUGH!!!! *runs back outside, slamming the door behind him*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hamtaro: DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK IN THERE!!! PLEASE I BEG OF YOU!!!!
Boss: I tried to tell you...
Bijou: Vell since ve can't go in there for now, vhat else can ve do for fun?
Cappy&Panda: FRIDGE SHOPPING!!!!! *run off*
*ten seconds pass and then they come running back*
Cappy: Um, which way is it to Sears?
Boss: That way. *points*
Panda: Thanks.
*Cappy and Panda race off again*
Howdy: Hey I know! How bout another game of tennis???
Dexter, still with huge bandage on forehead but now miraculously cured of brain trauma: Howdy, I would rather be handcuffed to a rampaging bison, fall off a 100-story building, get hit by a cement truck and get struck by lighting 20 times in a row, all at the same time, than ever play tennis with you again.
*suddenly Dexter disappears, then reappears on top of a 100-story building above a street filled with speeding cement trucks handcuffed to a rampaging bison in the middle of a thunderstorm*
Dexter: Hey wait! I was exaggerating!!! I didn't mean that!!!
*once again he disappears and then reappears back outside the clubhouse*
Howdy: What just happened?
Dexter: I dunno. Wanna play tennis?
Howdy: Seriously?
Dexter: Yeah, but this time let's play teams, and I'll be on your team to make sure you don't hit me with the ball again.
Howdy: Okay, but that means we need another team.
Sandy: Hey, like, me and Stan will play you guys! Won't we Stan?
Stan: Hold on, hold on. Does that mean this time I'm gonna get hit by the tennis ball of Howdy's wrath?
Sandy: Probably.
Stan: Alright!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~At the tennis court~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sandy: Ok, like, you guys can serve first since me and Stan are gonna totally pummel you anyway.
Howdy: Okey dokey. Here goes nothing. *serves the tennis ball and it goes flying directly into the back of Dexter's head*
Dexter: OW!!!!! HEY!!!!!
Howdy: Oops.
Dexter: How the heck did you manage that?????
Howdy: Well at least you didn't pass out that time.
Dexter: Gimme the ball. I'm gonna serve.
Howdy: Okay then. Whatever.
*Dexter serves the ball*
Stan: I got it!!! *hits it back over the net*
Howdy: Mine! *hits the ball, but somehow it manages to go backwards off his racket and straight into Dexter's forehead*
Dexter: HOLY............OOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!! *falls over backwards*
Howdy: Maybe it's this racket....I swear there's something wrong with it....
Stan: Lemme see that. *walks to the other side of the court and takes Howdy's racket, then swings it a few times to test it* Seems ok to me.
Sandy: Hold on. *takes the racket from Stan* Look here. *points to some microscopic writing on the handle* What does that say?
Howdy: Lemme see. *takes the racket back* Hmmm.....THIS......RACKET......HAS BEEN.......CURSED......BY.....THE EVIL......POWERS......OF......OF.....OF....
Stan&Sandy: Of what???
Howdy: OF......OF.....Spat.
Stan&Sandy: SPAT???
Howdy: Spat.
Spat, apparently appearing out of nowhere: Pppffffpppthhh!!! So! You're the one who stole my tennis racket, pppfffpppttthhh!!!
Howdy: Actually, I got it on clearance at Target.
Spat: Really? That's weird. I could've sworn that's my racket, pfpth.
Panda&Cappy, also appearing out of nowhere with a brand new fridge: HEY GUYS!!! LOOK AT THIS PIECE OF WORK!!!!
Howdy&Sandy&Stan&Spat (Dexter is still lying on the ground with those swirly things for eyes): Huh???
Panda: Is this not the greatest fridge you have ever seen???
Cappy: It's the big sale day at Sears!! It was 50% off!!!
Stan: Dude.
Sandy: Totally.
Howdy: Odely.
Spat: Pfpth?
Panda: And watch this. *presses a button and it starts dispensing ice*
Cappy: Whaddaya think? Huh? Huh?
Stan: Dude.
Sandy: Totally.
Howdy: Odely.
Spat: Pfpth.
*suddenly the ice dispenser starts going insane and spewing ice right at Spat*
Spat: PPPPFFFPPTHHH!!! CURSED REFDRIDGERATOR!!!! YOU SHALL PAY FOR THIS, PPFFPPTHH! *tries to fly away but his weak little wings are having a bit of trouble, and he falls on his face about ten times before finally giving up and running off on foot*
Spat, from way in the distance: YOU SHALL PAY!!!! REMEMBER THAT, PFPTH!!!!!! *gets hit by a random falling stick* Ow. Pftph.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oxnard: Tic-tac-toe! Three in a row!
Boss: Are you okay, Oxnard? You're not even playing tic-tac-toe.
Oxnard: I'm not? Oh, that's right, I'm not. I was gonna play with Hamtaro, but he mysteriously disappeared.
Boss: He what?
Oxnard: He mysteriously disappeared.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere on Monkey Island~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hamtaro: That's funny. How'd I get here? Maybe I fell through a hole in the space-time continuum...
Monkey Number 1 who is now Monkey King: AGH!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON MY SACRED ISLAND, FILTHY LOWLIFE???
Hamtaro: What did you call me?
Monkey king: FILTHY LOWLIFE!!!
Hamtaro: Heke?
Monkey king: FILTHY LOWLIFE!!!!
Hamtaro: What was that?
Monkey king: FILTHY - oh I give up. Now get off the island or I'm calling the monkey cops.
Hamtaro: Monkey cops?
Monkey king: You better believe it.
*suddenly a bunch of random monkeys in police outfits drop out of the sky*
Monkey cop 1: MONKEY
Monkey cop 2: COPS!
Monkey cop 3: MONKEY COPS!!!!
Monkey cop 4: Time for the monkey cop theme song!
Monkey cop 1: We are the cops who are also monkeys
Monkey cop 2: Don't laugh cuz it's not really that funny
Monkey cop 3: Monkeys doesn't rhyme with funny
Monkey cop 4: But that's ok because...Christmas bunny
*Now they break out into some crazy stupid dance number, and Hamtaro takes this oppurtunity to escape unharmed*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pashmina: I'm bored. How about you, Penelope?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: What do you wanna do?
Penelope: Ookyoo ookwee ookyoo yoo yoo!!
Pashmina: Hey, 20 questions! Good idea! You go first.
Penelope: Ookwee! *thinks for a minute* Ookyoo ookyoo.
Pashmina: Animal, is it? Okay. Is it duck-shaped?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: No? Ok...does it smell like noxious gas?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: Hmm....does it have feet?
Penelope: Ookwee!
Pashmina: It does? Okay...I think it's a flame-toed tree crab.
Penelope: Ookyoo ookyoo.
Pashmina: What do you mean that's not a real animal?
Penelope: Ookyoo ookwee ookyoo!
Pashmina: My questions are not dumb!
Penelope: Ookyoo ookyoo ookwee ookyoo.
Pashmina: THAT'S THE LAST STRAW, LITTLE MISS SMART MOUTH!!! I'M NOT PLAYING WITH YOU ANYMORE!!!
Penelope: *crosses her arms* OOKyoo.
Pashmina: WELL!! FINE!!!
Penelope: ..........Ookwee ookyoo.
Pashmina: That's it? The answer was a hamster? And you say my questions are dumb. Ha. Hamster. That's the most creative animal you could come up with?
Penelope: OOKWEE!!!
Pashmina: What do you mean, you were trying to go easy on me because I always lose? That's not true!
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: Okay, so maybe there aren't many animals that smell like noxious gas! At least my questions are creative!
Penelope: OOKYOO.
Pashmina: Humpf.
*Momentary angry silence*
Pashmina: Hey Penelope. Wanna play chess?
Penelope: Ookwee!
Pashmina: But go easy on me, okay?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Brazil~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Maxwell: Now where am I? I wish I knew how to get home...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back inside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Snoozer: Preciousssss....my precioussssss....mussssst find precioussssss...
*suddenly he falls through a hole in the space-time continuum*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lucky: Oh no, I've run out of me Lucky Charms!
*suddenly Snoozer falls out of the sky and lands outside Lucky's house*
Snoozer: What issss thisssss? Where am I? Issss preciousssss here? *goes inside Lucky's house*
Lucky: Well hello little hamster! 'Ave you come for a box of me Lucky Charms? I'm afraid I 'ave none at the moment!
*Snoozer sees Fluffy lying in the corner of Lucky's house*
Snoozer: MY PRECIOUSSSSSSS!!!! *runs over to Fluffy and cradles it in his arms* YOU!!! YOU STOLE PRECIOUSSSSS, UGLY BEARDED LITTLE MAN!!!!!
*Lucky screams like a girl*
Snoozer: NOW YOU MUST BE PUNISHED!!! *throws Fluffy at Lucky*
Lucky: ACH!!!! *faints*
*Snoozer goes back to being his normal self*
Snoozer: Now that I have my pillow back I can finally go back to sleep. *falls asleep and is somehow magically transported back to the clubhouse*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Alaska~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Maxwell: This doesn't look familiar.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boss: I don't hear any banging, crashing and/or destruction inside anymore. Think it's safe to go in?
Bijou: I do not know. Think we should wait for the others to get back from their tennis game and fridge shopping?
Boss: Eh. Nah.
Bijou: You go first to make sure it is safe. In the meantime, I think I vill randomly break out in song.
Boss: Okay. *goes to check out the situation inside the clubhouse*
Bijou: Here it comes.....EVERY NIGHT IN MY DREAMS, I SEE YOU, I FEEEEEL YOOUUUU...* madly off-key* THAT IS HOW I KNOW YOU GO ON....
Oxnard: OH THE HORROR!
Penelope: OOKWEE!!!
Pashmina: THAT MEANS SHUT UP!!!
Bijou: NEAR, FAR, WHEREEEEEEEEVER YOU ARE...
Spat: CUT IT OUT, PPPFFFFPPPTTHHH!!!
Bijou: Where'd you come from?
Spat: Circuit city. They have some awesome deals on DVD players, ppfffptth.
Bijou: Vell go away.
Spat: Okay. *vanishes into thin air, because I'm too lazy to write that he tried to fly away again and kept falling and finally had to give up and run - hey! I just wrote it all out anyway!! I'm so stupid sometimes!*
*a moment of silence passes*
Bijou: THE HILLS ARE ALIVE WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC.....
Oxnard: NO!!! NOT MORE!! I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!! *runs away*
Pashmina: I'M SORRY PENELOPE!!! *tries to cover Penelope's ears*
Penelope: *starts crying in anguish*
Howdy: Hey, we finished our game and - HOLY MOTHER OF MARY!!!! WHAT THE HECK IS THAT AWFUL NOISE?????
Pashmina: RUN, HOWDY!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!
Bijou: *finally shuts up* I think I am finished randomly breaking out into song.
Pashmina: Phew.
Penelope: Ookwee.
Howdy: You better be.
Stan: Dude, Bij, that was like such music to my ears. You can sing for me whenever you want, babe.
Sandy: STAN!!!! STOP IT!!!!
Stan: Yes ma'am.
Dexter, with an even bigger bandange on his head than before but still not sustaining any mental trauma: Where are Cappy and Panda? Weren't they with us just a second ago?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Cappy and Panda fall out of the sky outside Lucky's house*
Cappy: Hey! Where are we?
Panda: Not sure. Let's investigate that house over there.
Cappy: OKAY!
*they go inside and see Lucky passed out on the floor from being attacked by Fluffy*
Panda: Uh-oh. A crime scene.
Cappy: Better get some pictures. *whips out a camera and takes some pictures of Lucky passed out on the floor*
Panda: HEY!!!
Cappy: WHAT???
Panda: ISN'T THAT OUR FRIDGE???
Cappy: BY HEAVENS IT IS!!!
*Panda and Cappy run over to the stolen fridge and start hugging it*
Panda: We missed you, fridge!
Cappy: Never leave us again!
Panda: Hey, what about the new fridge?
Cappy: They can get married!
Panda: Hey, great idea! They'd make a good couple, wouldn't they?
Cappy: Yeah!
*momentary silence*
Panda: How are we gonna get this home?
Cappy: Easy. This weirdo stole it, so he can bring it back for us.
Panda: If he ever wakes up.
Cappy: Yeah.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Outside the clubhouse again~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boss: It's safe. Snoozer apparently found Fluffy and he is now fast - HOLY COW DEXTER WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HEAD???
Dexter: Please don't ask.
Howdy: Cursed tennis racket.
Boss: Who won the game?
Sandy: Me and Stan.
Howdy: But that's cuz it was one vs. two most of the time, since Dexter was unconscious for most of the game...
Dexter: Shut up Howdy.
Howdy: Okay.
Pashmina: Shall we go in now?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Cappy&Panda: WAIT!!!! *come running up, with Lucky the Leprechaun following them on his hands and knees with the fridge loaded on his back like a pack mule*
Lucky: Hee-haw.
Cappy: Look! We recovered the stolen fridge!
Everyone: HURRAY!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Maxwell randomly falls out of the sky*
Maxwell: Ow. Hey, a leprechaun house!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Inside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Panda: Okay, put the fridge over there, strange little bearded man.
Lucky: Hee-haw.
Snoozer: HEY!!! THAT IS THIEF!!!!!
Cappy: Yeah, we know. He stole our refridgerator.
Snoozer: ALSO FLUFFY THIEF!!!!!
Panda: Really?
Everyone: *glares suspiciously at Lucky*
Lucky: Oh, me. It's getting late. Time to go back to Leprechaun Land! *vanishes into thin air*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Lucky falls out of the sky*
Lucky: Thank goodness I'm home. *sees Maxwell* Oh no! More hamsters!
Maxwell: Hello leprechaun. Do I live here?
Lucky: No! No hamsters here!
Maxwell: Do you know where I live?
Lucky: Probably with those other crazy hamsters!
Maxwell: Really? Can you tell me how to get there?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back at the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Maxwell throws the door open*
Maxwell: Do I live here?
Everyone else: MAXWELL!!!!!
Maxwell: Do I live here?
Everyone else: WELCOME BACK!!!!!
Sandy: Here, let me get your suitcases! *takes some suitcases that Maxwell randomly has, with stickers from places all over the world on them saying stuff like 'North Korea or bust' and 'Greetings from Czechoslovakia'*
Maxwell: Do I know you?
Sandy: IT'S ME, SANDY!!! REMEMBER???
Maxwell: Sandy...Sandy...
*somewhere in the back of Maxwell's brain, a tiny lightbulb turns on*
Maxwell: Of course...it's all coming back to me now...
Bijou: I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THE RAIN IS GONE.....I CAN SEE ALL THE OBSTACLES IN MY WAY...
Everyone else: SHUT UP!!!!
Snoozer: *throws pillow at her* Take that.
*Oxnard comes bursting into the clubhouse*
Oxnard: Oh why? Why was I left out of most of this?
Genie: Woops. Sorry, Oxy! I completely forgot about you!
Oxnard: Oh that's heartening.
Snoozer: *throws pillow at Genie* Take that.
Genie: Man, I forgot about Hamtaro too. He's still on Monkey Island, I think.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere on Monkey Island~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hamtaro: Oh sigh...It seems I'm stuck here... *falls through a hole in the space-time continuum (I like that word, don't I?)*
*meanwhile, the monkey cops are still dancing and singing*
Monkey cop 1, with top hat and cane: I like to fight crime and I like to climb trees
Monkey cop 2, also with top hat and cane: I like to say "Bless you" when somebody sneeze
Monkey cop 3, also also with top hat and cane: I really like squash and I don't much like cheese
Monkey cop 4, also also also with top hat and cane: Don't come near me cuz I gots fleas
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back at the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Hamtaro falls through the hole in the space-time continuum right into the clubhouse*
Hamtaro: Uh, hi everyone.
Everyone: HI HAMTARO!!!!
Hamtaro: Hey, Maxwell and Fluffy and the stolen refridgerator came home! We should have a family reunion!
Everyone: YEAH!!!
~
A-hee-hee-hee - next chapter, you will find out what kinds of pointless things will happen at the family reunion! In celebration of Maxwell's and Fluffy's and Fridgie's return! Yes! And also - a wedding!!! That's right, someone's getting married!!! Find out who in the next chapter of THE UNTOLD HAMTARO!!! DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!!
~
Genie: Hello and welcome to the second edition of "The Untold Hamtaro!"
Cricket: I've still got my eye on you.
Genie: Hey, I wrote you into this fic, and I can take you out too!!! So shut up!!!
Cricket: *shuts up*
Genie: That's more like it. Now on to the story. On this lovely morning Hamtaro was once again on his way to the clubhouse...
Cricket: Oh that sure is a creative start.
Genie: I said shut up!!! *smashes cricket with a pot*
Cricket: Oohhhhoooowwwwwwwwww
Genie: Finally, vengeance is mine! Mwahahahahaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!! A-hem. Sorry. So as I was saying...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
Hamtaro: I'm just a-walkin' along - Hey! What's everyone doing standing around outside???
Boss: Snoozer's still looking for Fluffy. And he'll viciously attack anyone who comes near him. So it's safer out here.
Hamtaro: Haha. You're joking, right? Snoozer isn't vicious...*starts walking into clubhouse*
Boss: Well don't say I didn't warn you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Inside clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Snoozer: My preciousssssssss...it issssss misssssssing...
Hamtaro: Ham-ha Snoozer!
Snoozer: YOU! YOU STOLE MY PRECIOUSSSSSESSSS!!!!!!!
Hamtaro: Actually I -
Snoozer: GIVE ME MY PRECIOUSSSSSSS!!!!! *lunges at Hamtaro*
Hamtaro: AUGH!!!! *runs back outside, slamming the door behind him*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hamtaro: DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK IN THERE!!! PLEASE I BEG OF YOU!!!!
Boss: I tried to tell you...
Bijou: Vell since ve can't go in there for now, vhat else can ve do for fun?
Cappy&Panda: FRIDGE SHOPPING!!!!! *run off*
*ten seconds pass and then they come running back*
Cappy: Um, which way is it to Sears?
Boss: That way. *points*
Panda: Thanks.
*Cappy and Panda race off again*
Howdy: Hey I know! How bout another game of tennis???
Dexter, still with huge bandage on forehead but now miraculously cured of brain trauma: Howdy, I would rather be handcuffed to a rampaging bison, fall off a 100-story building, get hit by a cement truck and get struck by lighting 20 times in a row, all at the same time, than ever play tennis with you again.
*suddenly Dexter disappears, then reappears on top of a 100-story building above a street filled with speeding cement trucks handcuffed to a rampaging bison in the middle of a thunderstorm*
Dexter: Hey wait! I was exaggerating!!! I didn't mean that!!!
*once again he disappears and then reappears back outside the clubhouse*
Howdy: What just happened?
Dexter: I dunno. Wanna play tennis?
Howdy: Seriously?
Dexter: Yeah, but this time let's play teams, and I'll be on your team to make sure you don't hit me with the ball again.
Howdy: Okay, but that means we need another team.
Sandy: Hey, like, me and Stan will play you guys! Won't we Stan?
Stan: Hold on, hold on. Does that mean this time I'm gonna get hit by the tennis ball of Howdy's wrath?
Sandy: Probably.
Stan: Alright!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~At the tennis court~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sandy: Ok, like, you guys can serve first since me and Stan are gonna totally pummel you anyway.
Howdy: Okey dokey. Here goes nothing. *serves the tennis ball and it goes flying directly into the back of Dexter's head*
Dexter: OW!!!!! HEY!!!!!
Howdy: Oops.
Dexter: How the heck did you manage that?????
Howdy: Well at least you didn't pass out that time.
Dexter: Gimme the ball. I'm gonna serve.
Howdy: Okay then. Whatever.
*Dexter serves the ball*
Stan: I got it!!! *hits it back over the net*
Howdy: Mine! *hits the ball, but somehow it manages to go backwards off his racket and straight into Dexter's forehead*
Dexter: HOLY............OOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!! *falls over backwards*
Howdy: Maybe it's this racket....I swear there's something wrong with it....
Stan: Lemme see that. *walks to the other side of the court and takes Howdy's racket, then swings it a few times to test it* Seems ok to me.
Sandy: Hold on. *takes the racket from Stan* Look here. *points to some microscopic writing on the handle* What does that say?
Howdy: Lemme see. *takes the racket back* Hmmm.....THIS......RACKET......HAS BEEN.......CURSED......BY.....THE EVIL......POWERS......OF......OF.....OF....
Stan&Sandy: Of what???
Howdy: OF......OF.....Spat.
Stan&Sandy: SPAT???
Howdy: Spat.
Spat, apparently appearing out of nowhere: Pppffffpppthhh!!! So! You're the one who stole my tennis racket, pppfffpppttthhh!!!
Howdy: Actually, I got it on clearance at Target.
Spat: Really? That's weird. I could've sworn that's my racket, pfpth.
Panda&Cappy, also appearing out of nowhere with a brand new fridge: HEY GUYS!!! LOOK AT THIS PIECE OF WORK!!!!
Howdy&Sandy&Stan&Spat (Dexter is still lying on the ground with those swirly things for eyes): Huh???
Panda: Is this not the greatest fridge you have ever seen???
Cappy: It's the big sale day at Sears!! It was 50% off!!!
Stan: Dude.
Sandy: Totally.
Howdy: Odely.
Spat: Pfpth?
Panda: And watch this. *presses a button and it starts dispensing ice*
Cappy: Whaddaya think? Huh? Huh?
Stan: Dude.
Sandy: Totally.
Howdy: Odely.
Spat: Pfpth.
*suddenly the ice dispenser starts going insane and spewing ice right at Spat*
Spat: PPPPFFFPPTHHH!!! CURSED REFDRIDGERATOR!!!! YOU SHALL PAY FOR THIS, PPFFPPTHH! *tries to fly away but his weak little wings are having a bit of trouble, and he falls on his face about ten times before finally giving up and running off on foot*
Spat, from way in the distance: YOU SHALL PAY!!!! REMEMBER THAT, PFPTH!!!!!! *gets hit by a random falling stick* Ow. Pftph.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oxnard: Tic-tac-toe! Three in a row!
Boss: Are you okay, Oxnard? You're not even playing tic-tac-toe.
Oxnard: I'm not? Oh, that's right, I'm not. I was gonna play with Hamtaro, but he mysteriously disappeared.
Boss: He what?
Oxnard: He mysteriously disappeared.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere on Monkey Island~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hamtaro: That's funny. How'd I get here? Maybe I fell through a hole in the space-time continuum...
Monkey Number 1 who is now Monkey King: AGH!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON MY SACRED ISLAND, FILTHY LOWLIFE???
Hamtaro: What did you call me?
Monkey king: FILTHY LOWLIFE!!!
Hamtaro: Heke?
Monkey king: FILTHY LOWLIFE!!!!
Hamtaro: What was that?
Monkey king: FILTHY - oh I give up. Now get off the island or I'm calling the monkey cops.
Hamtaro: Monkey cops?
Monkey king: You better believe it.
*suddenly a bunch of random monkeys in police outfits drop out of the sky*
Monkey cop 1: MONKEY
Monkey cop 2: COPS!
Monkey cop 3: MONKEY COPS!!!!
Monkey cop 4: Time for the monkey cop theme song!
Monkey cop 1: We are the cops who are also monkeys
Monkey cop 2: Don't laugh cuz it's not really that funny
Monkey cop 3: Monkeys doesn't rhyme with funny
Monkey cop 4: But that's ok because...Christmas bunny
*Now they break out into some crazy stupid dance number, and Hamtaro takes this oppurtunity to escape unharmed*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pashmina: I'm bored. How about you, Penelope?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: What do you wanna do?
Penelope: Ookyoo ookwee ookyoo yoo yoo!!
Pashmina: Hey, 20 questions! Good idea! You go first.
Penelope: Ookwee! *thinks for a minute* Ookyoo ookyoo.
Pashmina: Animal, is it? Okay. Is it duck-shaped?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: No? Ok...does it smell like noxious gas?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: Hmm....does it have feet?
Penelope: Ookwee!
Pashmina: It does? Okay...I think it's a flame-toed tree crab.
Penelope: Ookyoo ookyoo.
Pashmina: What do you mean that's not a real animal?
Penelope: Ookyoo ookwee ookyoo!
Pashmina: My questions are not dumb!
Penelope: Ookyoo ookyoo ookwee ookyoo.
Pashmina: THAT'S THE LAST STRAW, LITTLE MISS SMART MOUTH!!! I'M NOT PLAYING WITH YOU ANYMORE!!!
Penelope: *crosses her arms* OOKyoo.
Pashmina: WELL!! FINE!!!
Penelope: ..........Ookwee ookyoo.
Pashmina: That's it? The answer was a hamster? And you say my questions are dumb. Ha. Hamster. That's the most creative animal you could come up with?
Penelope: OOKWEE!!!
Pashmina: What do you mean, you were trying to go easy on me because I always lose? That's not true!
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Pashmina: Okay, so maybe there aren't many animals that smell like noxious gas! At least my questions are creative!
Penelope: OOKYOO.
Pashmina: Humpf.
*Momentary angry silence*
Pashmina: Hey Penelope. Wanna play chess?
Penelope: Ookwee!
Pashmina: But go easy on me, okay?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Brazil~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Maxwell: Now where am I? I wish I knew how to get home...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back inside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Snoozer: Preciousssss....my precioussssss....mussssst find precioussssss...
*suddenly he falls through a hole in the space-time continuum*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lucky: Oh no, I've run out of me Lucky Charms!
*suddenly Snoozer falls out of the sky and lands outside Lucky's house*
Snoozer: What issss thisssss? Where am I? Issss preciousssss here? *goes inside Lucky's house*
Lucky: Well hello little hamster! 'Ave you come for a box of me Lucky Charms? I'm afraid I 'ave none at the moment!
*Snoozer sees Fluffy lying in the corner of Lucky's house*
Snoozer: MY PRECIOUSSSSSSS!!!! *runs over to Fluffy and cradles it in his arms* YOU!!! YOU STOLE PRECIOUSSSSS, UGLY BEARDED LITTLE MAN!!!!!
*Lucky screams like a girl*
Snoozer: NOW YOU MUST BE PUNISHED!!! *throws Fluffy at Lucky*
Lucky: ACH!!!! *faints*
*Snoozer goes back to being his normal self*
Snoozer: Now that I have my pillow back I can finally go back to sleep. *falls asleep and is somehow magically transported back to the clubhouse*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Alaska~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Maxwell: This doesn't look familiar.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back outside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boss: I don't hear any banging, crashing and/or destruction inside anymore. Think it's safe to go in?
Bijou: I do not know. Think we should wait for the others to get back from their tennis game and fridge shopping?
Boss: Eh. Nah.
Bijou: You go first to make sure it is safe. In the meantime, I think I vill randomly break out in song.
Boss: Okay. *goes to check out the situation inside the clubhouse*
Bijou: Here it comes.....EVERY NIGHT IN MY DREAMS, I SEE YOU, I FEEEEEL YOOUUUU...* madly off-key* THAT IS HOW I KNOW YOU GO ON....
Oxnard: OH THE HORROR!
Penelope: OOKWEE!!!
Pashmina: THAT MEANS SHUT UP!!!
Bijou: NEAR, FAR, WHEREEEEEEEEVER YOU ARE...
Spat: CUT IT OUT, PPPFFFFPPPTTHHH!!!
Bijou: Where'd you come from?
Spat: Circuit city. They have some awesome deals on DVD players, ppfffptth.
Bijou: Vell go away.
Spat: Okay. *vanishes into thin air, because I'm too lazy to write that he tried to fly away again and kept falling and finally had to give up and run - hey! I just wrote it all out anyway!! I'm so stupid sometimes!*
*a moment of silence passes*
Bijou: THE HILLS ARE ALIVE WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC.....
Oxnard: NO!!! NOT MORE!! I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!! *runs away*
Pashmina: I'M SORRY PENELOPE!!! *tries to cover Penelope's ears*
Penelope: *starts crying in anguish*
Howdy: Hey, we finished our game and - HOLY MOTHER OF MARY!!!! WHAT THE HECK IS THAT AWFUL NOISE?????
Pashmina: RUN, HOWDY!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!
Bijou: *finally shuts up* I think I am finished randomly breaking out into song.
Pashmina: Phew.
Penelope: Ookwee.
Howdy: You better be.
Stan: Dude, Bij, that was like such music to my ears. You can sing for me whenever you want, babe.
Sandy: STAN!!!! STOP IT!!!!
Stan: Yes ma'am.
Dexter, with an even bigger bandange on his head than before but still not sustaining any mental trauma: Where are Cappy and Panda? Weren't they with us just a second ago?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Cappy and Panda fall out of the sky outside Lucky's house*
Cappy: Hey! Where are we?
Panda: Not sure. Let's investigate that house over there.
Cappy: OKAY!
*they go inside and see Lucky passed out on the floor from being attacked by Fluffy*
Panda: Uh-oh. A crime scene.
Cappy: Better get some pictures. *whips out a camera and takes some pictures of Lucky passed out on the floor*
Panda: HEY!!!
Cappy: WHAT???
Panda: ISN'T THAT OUR FRIDGE???
Cappy: BY HEAVENS IT IS!!!
*Panda and Cappy run over to the stolen fridge and start hugging it*
Panda: We missed you, fridge!
Cappy: Never leave us again!
Panda: Hey, what about the new fridge?
Cappy: They can get married!
Panda: Hey, great idea! They'd make a good couple, wouldn't they?
Cappy: Yeah!
*momentary silence*
Panda: How are we gonna get this home?
Cappy: Easy. This weirdo stole it, so he can bring it back for us.
Panda: If he ever wakes up.
Cappy: Yeah.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Outside the clubhouse again~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boss: It's safe. Snoozer apparently found Fluffy and he is now fast - HOLY COW DEXTER WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HEAD???
Dexter: Please don't ask.
Howdy: Cursed tennis racket.
Boss: Who won the game?
Sandy: Me and Stan.
Howdy: But that's cuz it was one vs. two most of the time, since Dexter was unconscious for most of the game...
Dexter: Shut up Howdy.
Howdy: Okay.
Pashmina: Shall we go in now?
Penelope: Ookyoo.
Cappy&Panda: WAIT!!!! *come running up, with Lucky the Leprechaun following them on his hands and knees with the fridge loaded on his back like a pack mule*
Lucky: Hee-haw.
Cappy: Look! We recovered the stolen fridge!
Everyone: HURRAY!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Maxwell randomly falls out of the sky*
Maxwell: Ow. Hey, a leprechaun house!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Inside the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Panda: Okay, put the fridge over there, strange little bearded man.
Lucky: Hee-haw.
Snoozer: HEY!!! THAT IS THIEF!!!!!
Cappy: Yeah, we know. He stole our refridgerator.
Snoozer: ALSO FLUFFY THIEF!!!!!
Panda: Really?
Everyone: *glares suspiciously at Lucky*
Lucky: Oh, me. It's getting late. Time to go back to Leprechaun Land! *vanishes into thin air*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere in Leprechaun Land~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Lucky falls out of the sky*
Lucky: Thank goodness I'm home. *sees Maxwell* Oh no! More hamsters!
Maxwell: Hello leprechaun. Do I live here?
Lucky: No! No hamsters here!
Maxwell: Do you know where I live?
Lucky: Probably with those other crazy hamsters!
Maxwell: Really? Can you tell me how to get there?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back at the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Maxwell throws the door open*
Maxwell: Do I live here?
Everyone else: MAXWELL!!!!!
Maxwell: Do I live here?
Everyone else: WELCOME BACK!!!!!
Sandy: Here, let me get your suitcases! *takes some suitcases that Maxwell randomly has, with stickers from places all over the world on them saying stuff like 'North Korea or bust' and 'Greetings from Czechoslovakia'*
Maxwell: Do I know you?
Sandy: IT'S ME, SANDY!!! REMEMBER???
Maxwell: Sandy...Sandy...
*somewhere in the back of Maxwell's brain, a tiny lightbulb turns on*
Maxwell: Of course...it's all coming back to me now...
Bijou: I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THE RAIN IS GONE.....I CAN SEE ALL THE OBSTACLES IN MY WAY...
Everyone else: SHUT UP!!!!
Snoozer: *throws pillow at her* Take that.
*Oxnard comes bursting into the clubhouse*
Oxnard: Oh why? Why was I left out of most of this?
Genie: Woops. Sorry, Oxy! I completely forgot about you!
Oxnard: Oh that's heartening.
Snoozer: *throws pillow at Genie* Take that.
Genie: Man, I forgot about Hamtaro too. He's still on Monkey Island, I think.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Somewhere on Monkey Island~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hamtaro: Oh sigh...It seems I'm stuck here... *falls through a hole in the space-time continuum (I like that word, don't I?)*
*meanwhile, the monkey cops are still dancing and singing*
Monkey cop 1, with top hat and cane: I like to fight crime and I like to climb trees
Monkey cop 2, also with top hat and cane: I like to say "Bless you" when somebody sneeze
Monkey cop 3, also also with top hat and cane: I really like squash and I don't much like cheese
Monkey cop 4, also also also with top hat and cane: Don't come near me cuz I gots fleas
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back at the clubhouse~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Hamtaro falls through the hole in the space-time continuum right into the clubhouse*
Hamtaro: Uh, hi everyone.
Everyone: HI HAMTARO!!!!
Hamtaro: Hey, Maxwell and Fluffy and the stolen refridgerator came home! We should have a family reunion!
Everyone: YEAH!!!
~
A-hee-hee-hee - next chapter, you will find out what kinds of pointless things will happen at the family reunion! In celebration of Maxwell's and Fluffy's and Fridgie's return! Yes! And also - a wedding!!! That's right, someone's getting married!!! Find out who in the next chapter of THE UNTOLD HAMTARO!!! DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!!