(A/N can't think of anything funny so I'll just get straight to the story,
here it is, oh and I promised my friend that she would get a mention in
this fic, I said she could be seen in Edoras, so we get to play spot the
friend.)
Well after several hours we did indeed get to Edoras, it actually looked quite similar to how it did in the film, the only difference is that the roof of Meduseld actually does look golden in reality. In the film I really couldn't see the goldenness of the roof but you really could see it now.
So we reached the bottom of the hill and were about to go through the gate when the flag flew down and landed near us, now in the film I thought it was very strange that they all just ignored the fact that someone's possession was being blown in the wind so I decided that as I was so nice I would get it.
Sadly the wind kept blowing it away every time I was about to grab it, it took about ten minutes to finally get it during which time all my companions, and several villagers and guards who had been near the gates started laughing hysterically. Honestly it wasn't that funny was it?
Ignoring them I climbed shakily back up to my horse, I swear even the horses were laughing at me. So we rode into the city and Gimli made a joke about finding more cheer in a graveyard, which was really unfair considering that the kings son had just died but I suppose the shrimp had no way of knowing that.
I looked around for someone to give the flag to when suddenly my eyes fell onto a girl about my age.
"Louise" I shouted "what are you doing here"
The girl walked up to me looking confused
"My names Louisa not Louise, do I know you?"
"Oh, no sorry, you just looked a lot like a friend of mine called Louise, are you sure that's not your name"
"Yes quite sure, I'm sure I was called Louisa last time I checked"
"Ok, sorry to bother you, do you know what I can do with this flag?"
"Umm, I'd just give it the lady Eowyn if you're going to the hall; she's the lady in white up there" the girl who looked exactly like Louise said.
"Thanks" I replied before riding after the others who were waiting impatiently for me. How strange, I could have sworn she was Louise, coincidence maybe.
Well we reached the hall in record time after that and then the guards came out and demanded that we gave them our weapons. Well Aragorn and Gimli complied grudgingly, Gandalf and Legolas gave them their weapons without complaint, Lauren seemed glad to get rid of hers, bit heavy for her I expect, and Elanor, Elin and I thought for a minute before giving them over, I thought they would be quite useful when the evil men attacked but then decided that I would be ok.
"Your staff" Hama said, looking at it and holding out his hand.
"You wouldn't part an old man from his stick" said Gandalf, suddenly looking a lot frailer than he had before.
Well we four freaks almost spoiled the game by laughing hysterically, but Hama chose to ignore us and after looking suspiciously at the Istari for a moment he let us in.
So we started walking down the hall and sure enough ugly looking evil people started following us on either side.
"Elanor" I whispered "What do we do, I'm not very good at fist fights, I'm not very good at any fights really but at least when I have some sort of weapon I tend to do a little bit better."
"Kick them where it hurts" she whispered back. Grinning I waited for them to start attacking.
Sure enough they all assailed us and chaos ensued. As in the film Legolas and co started punching them, and I was watching said leader before I heard a scream. Looking round I sighed to see Lauren backing away from a man. I was debating whether or not to help when a blur leapt out and rugby tackled the attacker, it was Elin. Grinning I turned round to see someone approaching me, taking Sam's advice to heart I kicked him right in the groin, the result was amusing, he fell to the floor immediately and started rolling around in agony. I could hear similar screams of anguish coming from the other side of the room and decided that Sam had done the same thing.
I turned my attention back to the king who had ceased looking ugly and dead, and was now hugging Eowyn. You know, that king has real mood swings, one minute he's hugging his niece, the next he's throwing someone down the stairs and threatening to kill them. Well actually I think he was trying to kill them but Aragorn decided to step in and stop him.
And Grima isn't very good at the whole gratitude thing, Aragorn saves his life and what does he do, he spits at him, talk about being grateful, I really think he needs to learn how to thank people. Unless he was taught that spitting at someone is the equivalent of thanking them, in which case we can forgive him.
You should have seen Legolas's face when Aragorn got spat on, if looks could kill, Grima would have just died the most painful death imaginable, I don't think anyone would have minded particularly either. In fact I would most probably have joined in, I may annoy the fellowship but I do like them.
So we all wandered back in again after Grima had left the city and then Gandalf took over as advisor to the king. The very stubborn king who refused to listen to a word Gandalf said despite the fact that Gandalf is obviously a lot cleverer than him, what is the point in having an advisor when you don't even listen to a word he says.
So while the king the wizard and the three hunters were arguing about whether or not to go to Helms Deep the four of us decided to go for a walk and explore the city, well three of us decided to go for a walk, one of us, not mentioning any names but you can probably guess who if you try very hard, this person sulked for a little while about how much she hated being in Middle Earth then grudgingly followed us, still muttering about how it all wasn't real. Now personally I think Lauren was a bit stupid for saying this, oops, my mistake you weren't supposed to know it was Lauren, silly me. Well anyway considering she has spent quite a few months in Middle Earth now you would think she would finally have started to believe in it like any sane person.
Well the people of Rohan were just as cheerful as they had been before, I saw Louisa and waved at her, I think she must have found me slightly strange for although she waved back she gave me a look that quite clearly meant that she thought I was a freak.
As we were walking through the streets I couldn't help but wonder what Diddins was doing.
Diddins's thoughts
I waved goodbye to Elin, Lauren and Gandalf then turned back to the hobbits, Treebeard and Orville, who had been hiding in a bush at the sight of the wizard but came out again now.
"So Treebeard, where are we going now?" I asked, looking up, and up, and up at the large tree like creature in front of me.
"I told Gandalf that I would look after you, and that is what I will do. I do not how ever think that the other ent's will look to kindly to having an orc in the forest, and the huorns even less so if I was you I would tell your..." the ent seemed to think for a moment before finishing his sentence. "Friend, if he truly is that, that it would be better for him to leave the forest in the near future."
"Okeydokey, Orville old buddy"
"Yes Diddins, thanks for not letting the tree...plant...ent, that's the one, ent kill me, I rather like living"
"Oh that's fine, what are friends for."
"You think I'm your friend" the orc sniffed slightly before bursting into tears.
"Yay, I've never had a friend before, I'm *sniff* so *sniff* happy"
How sad, I thought to myself, imagine never having a friend, just because orcs aren't the prettiest creature in the world they don't get any friends, honestly people are so shallow nowadays. Patting the emotionally speechless orc on the shoulder I finished what I had been saying.
"Well anyway Orvy, Treebeard here says that unless you wish to get squished by any other ent's it would be a good idea for you to leave the forest. It was very nice meeting you, I hope I see you again sometime, I will miss you."
"And you Diddins, I too hope we meet again." Waving over his shoulder the orc trotted off and I couldn't help the small tear that formed in my eye. My hay fever gets so bad around this time of the year. Anyway turning back I saw that the hobbits and the ent were giving me rather strange looks, I was however used to this and so ignored them.
"You know Treebeard, your name isn't very original is it, I mean you have a beard and you look like a tree, it was a bit of an obvious name really, I bet I could think of something a lot more unique to call you."
Merry and Pippin sighed at this, I don't know why, maybe they though the same thing about the ent's name and were sighing in relief. However when I then heard Pippin mutter to Treebeard
"Ignore her, she is utterly insane, she tried to rename all of the orcs, but Orville was the only one who actually kept his new name and that was only because he was originally called Grishnak and I think anything is better than that."
That only caused me to grin insanely though, being called insane was something else I was used to and it didn't bother me in the slightest, in fact I was actually quite proud of it.
Well Treebeard picked up the hobbits and moved as if to do the same to me.
"No thanks Mickey, I would rather run, I need to practise with my cross country otherwise I will get out of practise."
Mickey nodded at me strangely at that before saying.
"Why did you call me Mickey, last time I checked my name was either Fangorn or Treebeard, well there are a few other renditions as well but they are in entish and would take a long time to tell you. I have never heard of it being translated to Mickey though."
"No, I just decided that that was a more interesting name, don't you like it?"
"I cant say I do, young human. But it was a nice thought."
Well fancy not liking the name Mickey, we left the clearing though and I started thinking up a lot more names
Back to Megan
I decided that Diane was probably doing something along the lines of renaming the ent's and so I turned to Sam and asked "What do you want to do now?"
"Well I would quite like to wash my hair, I haven't done that since Lorien but as it will probably be Theodreds funeral soon, and then we will be leaving for Helms Deep I doubt that there will be time"
"I agree, sadly as I would really like to wash my hair."
"Why do we have to go to some stupid persons funeral anyway?" Lauren asked in her stupid whiney voice, a voice which quickly squeaked when Elanor grabbed her by the neck. Elanor had decided that Theodred was really quite fit after watching the extended DVD and seeing the part where they find him by the fords.
"Don't be so rude and stupid" she, for lack of better description of her voice lets just say she growled. Well for once even Elin didn't stick up for her friend, after all she was very rude, and to the dead no less.
Sure enough after about half an hour a bell was rung and we walked back to the hall to find out what was happening.
"Leggy" I asked, ignoring the look of annoyance that flashed over the gorgeous, fit, green eyed, fair haired... ok you get the point. "What was the bell for, what's happening now." for some reason the elf seemed to be sulking over something and so he didn't answer.
Turning to Aragorn I repeated the question, just replacing Leggy with Acorn. That had much the same result, but finally, after calling Gimli Giblet, and Gandalf Gandy Eowyn solemnly informed me that it was time for her cousin's funeral. Well that shut me up and I nodded solemnly before following my companions out of the golden halls and down to the crowds waiting for the burial of their heir.
So we walked down to the big mound where Theodred was about to be buried in and joined the villagers that were waiting. The body of Theodred was carried down on a bier and the king and Eowyn followed, looking very sad. I couldn't help but feel sorry for Eomer, Theodred was his cousin as well but he wasn't there because he had been banished. So the body was placed in the mound and Eowyn began to sing a lament for her cousin.
I felt tears coming into my eyes, something which surprised me as I don't cry very often. Looking around I saw that Elanor was crying floods, something which didn't surprise me because despite her bloodthirsty nature she actually cries very easily. Elin looked sad, and even Lauren looked more solemn than usual, despite the fact that she was muttering about how he was only a fictional character so there was no need to be upset.
Well the funeral was over soon, and everyone, barring Gandalf and Théoden left the mound, most of us sniffing or at least looking sad.
(Ok I realise that that chapter really wasn't funny, but I just couldn't see anyway of making it funny so this was the result. I would also like to say that IT'S THE HOLIDAYS, WOOHOO, sorry, it wasn't the holidays when I started this chapter so I didn't say it then but it is now officially the holidays. Its also my birthday in three days, yay, presents. Though due to bank holidays, Sundays and work I wont be able to put this chapter up before my birthday so it would have passed by the time you read this. Doesn't matter though, you all know now. Not that I think many of you will actually care but meh on the off chance that any of you were interested...ok I'll stop babbling now, Namarie mellyn.
Well after several hours we did indeed get to Edoras, it actually looked quite similar to how it did in the film, the only difference is that the roof of Meduseld actually does look golden in reality. In the film I really couldn't see the goldenness of the roof but you really could see it now.
So we reached the bottom of the hill and were about to go through the gate when the flag flew down and landed near us, now in the film I thought it was very strange that they all just ignored the fact that someone's possession was being blown in the wind so I decided that as I was so nice I would get it.
Sadly the wind kept blowing it away every time I was about to grab it, it took about ten minutes to finally get it during which time all my companions, and several villagers and guards who had been near the gates started laughing hysterically. Honestly it wasn't that funny was it?
Ignoring them I climbed shakily back up to my horse, I swear even the horses were laughing at me. So we rode into the city and Gimli made a joke about finding more cheer in a graveyard, which was really unfair considering that the kings son had just died but I suppose the shrimp had no way of knowing that.
I looked around for someone to give the flag to when suddenly my eyes fell onto a girl about my age.
"Louise" I shouted "what are you doing here"
The girl walked up to me looking confused
"My names Louisa not Louise, do I know you?"
"Oh, no sorry, you just looked a lot like a friend of mine called Louise, are you sure that's not your name"
"Yes quite sure, I'm sure I was called Louisa last time I checked"
"Ok, sorry to bother you, do you know what I can do with this flag?"
"Umm, I'd just give it the lady Eowyn if you're going to the hall; she's the lady in white up there" the girl who looked exactly like Louise said.
"Thanks" I replied before riding after the others who were waiting impatiently for me. How strange, I could have sworn she was Louise, coincidence maybe.
Well we reached the hall in record time after that and then the guards came out and demanded that we gave them our weapons. Well Aragorn and Gimli complied grudgingly, Gandalf and Legolas gave them their weapons without complaint, Lauren seemed glad to get rid of hers, bit heavy for her I expect, and Elanor, Elin and I thought for a minute before giving them over, I thought they would be quite useful when the evil men attacked but then decided that I would be ok.
"Your staff" Hama said, looking at it and holding out his hand.
"You wouldn't part an old man from his stick" said Gandalf, suddenly looking a lot frailer than he had before.
Well we four freaks almost spoiled the game by laughing hysterically, but Hama chose to ignore us and after looking suspiciously at the Istari for a moment he let us in.
So we started walking down the hall and sure enough ugly looking evil people started following us on either side.
"Elanor" I whispered "What do we do, I'm not very good at fist fights, I'm not very good at any fights really but at least when I have some sort of weapon I tend to do a little bit better."
"Kick them where it hurts" she whispered back. Grinning I waited for them to start attacking.
Sure enough they all assailed us and chaos ensued. As in the film Legolas and co started punching them, and I was watching said leader before I heard a scream. Looking round I sighed to see Lauren backing away from a man. I was debating whether or not to help when a blur leapt out and rugby tackled the attacker, it was Elin. Grinning I turned round to see someone approaching me, taking Sam's advice to heart I kicked him right in the groin, the result was amusing, he fell to the floor immediately and started rolling around in agony. I could hear similar screams of anguish coming from the other side of the room and decided that Sam had done the same thing.
I turned my attention back to the king who had ceased looking ugly and dead, and was now hugging Eowyn. You know, that king has real mood swings, one minute he's hugging his niece, the next he's throwing someone down the stairs and threatening to kill them. Well actually I think he was trying to kill them but Aragorn decided to step in and stop him.
And Grima isn't very good at the whole gratitude thing, Aragorn saves his life and what does he do, he spits at him, talk about being grateful, I really think he needs to learn how to thank people. Unless he was taught that spitting at someone is the equivalent of thanking them, in which case we can forgive him.
You should have seen Legolas's face when Aragorn got spat on, if looks could kill, Grima would have just died the most painful death imaginable, I don't think anyone would have minded particularly either. In fact I would most probably have joined in, I may annoy the fellowship but I do like them.
So we all wandered back in again after Grima had left the city and then Gandalf took over as advisor to the king. The very stubborn king who refused to listen to a word Gandalf said despite the fact that Gandalf is obviously a lot cleverer than him, what is the point in having an advisor when you don't even listen to a word he says.
So while the king the wizard and the three hunters were arguing about whether or not to go to Helms Deep the four of us decided to go for a walk and explore the city, well three of us decided to go for a walk, one of us, not mentioning any names but you can probably guess who if you try very hard, this person sulked for a little while about how much she hated being in Middle Earth then grudgingly followed us, still muttering about how it all wasn't real. Now personally I think Lauren was a bit stupid for saying this, oops, my mistake you weren't supposed to know it was Lauren, silly me. Well anyway considering she has spent quite a few months in Middle Earth now you would think she would finally have started to believe in it like any sane person.
Well the people of Rohan were just as cheerful as they had been before, I saw Louisa and waved at her, I think she must have found me slightly strange for although she waved back she gave me a look that quite clearly meant that she thought I was a freak.
As we were walking through the streets I couldn't help but wonder what Diddins was doing.
Diddins's thoughts
I waved goodbye to Elin, Lauren and Gandalf then turned back to the hobbits, Treebeard and Orville, who had been hiding in a bush at the sight of the wizard but came out again now.
"So Treebeard, where are we going now?" I asked, looking up, and up, and up at the large tree like creature in front of me.
"I told Gandalf that I would look after you, and that is what I will do. I do not how ever think that the other ent's will look to kindly to having an orc in the forest, and the huorns even less so if I was you I would tell your..." the ent seemed to think for a moment before finishing his sentence. "Friend, if he truly is that, that it would be better for him to leave the forest in the near future."
"Okeydokey, Orville old buddy"
"Yes Diddins, thanks for not letting the tree...plant...ent, that's the one, ent kill me, I rather like living"
"Oh that's fine, what are friends for."
"You think I'm your friend" the orc sniffed slightly before bursting into tears.
"Yay, I've never had a friend before, I'm *sniff* so *sniff* happy"
How sad, I thought to myself, imagine never having a friend, just because orcs aren't the prettiest creature in the world they don't get any friends, honestly people are so shallow nowadays. Patting the emotionally speechless orc on the shoulder I finished what I had been saying.
"Well anyway Orvy, Treebeard here says that unless you wish to get squished by any other ent's it would be a good idea for you to leave the forest. It was very nice meeting you, I hope I see you again sometime, I will miss you."
"And you Diddins, I too hope we meet again." Waving over his shoulder the orc trotted off and I couldn't help the small tear that formed in my eye. My hay fever gets so bad around this time of the year. Anyway turning back I saw that the hobbits and the ent were giving me rather strange looks, I was however used to this and so ignored them.
"You know Treebeard, your name isn't very original is it, I mean you have a beard and you look like a tree, it was a bit of an obvious name really, I bet I could think of something a lot more unique to call you."
Merry and Pippin sighed at this, I don't know why, maybe they though the same thing about the ent's name and were sighing in relief. However when I then heard Pippin mutter to Treebeard
"Ignore her, she is utterly insane, she tried to rename all of the orcs, but Orville was the only one who actually kept his new name and that was only because he was originally called Grishnak and I think anything is better than that."
That only caused me to grin insanely though, being called insane was something else I was used to and it didn't bother me in the slightest, in fact I was actually quite proud of it.
Well Treebeard picked up the hobbits and moved as if to do the same to me.
"No thanks Mickey, I would rather run, I need to practise with my cross country otherwise I will get out of practise."
Mickey nodded at me strangely at that before saying.
"Why did you call me Mickey, last time I checked my name was either Fangorn or Treebeard, well there are a few other renditions as well but they are in entish and would take a long time to tell you. I have never heard of it being translated to Mickey though."
"No, I just decided that that was a more interesting name, don't you like it?"
"I cant say I do, young human. But it was a nice thought."
Well fancy not liking the name Mickey, we left the clearing though and I started thinking up a lot more names
Back to Megan
I decided that Diane was probably doing something along the lines of renaming the ent's and so I turned to Sam and asked "What do you want to do now?"
"Well I would quite like to wash my hair, I haven't done that since Lorien but as it will probably be Theodreds funeral soon, and then we will be leaving for Helms Deep I doubt that there will be time"
"I agree, sadly as I would really like to wash my hair."
"Why do we have to go to some stupid persons funeral anyway?" Lauren asked in her stupid whiney voice, a voice which quickly squeaked when Elanor grabbed her by the neck. Elanor had decided that Theodred was really quite fit after watching the extended DVD and seeing the part where they find him by the fords.
"Don't be so rude and stupid" she, for lack of better description of her voice lets just say she growled. Well for once even Elin didn't stick up for her friend, after all she was very rude, and to the dead no less.
Sure enough after about half an hour a bell was rung and we walked back to the hall to find out what was happening.
"Leggy" I asked, ignoring the look of annoyance that flashed over the gorgeous, fit, green eyed, fair haired... ok you get the point. "What was the bell for, what's happening now." for some reason the elf seemed to be sulking over something and so he didn't answer.
Turning to Aragorn I repeated the question, just replacing Leggy with Acorn. That had much the same result, but finally, after calling Gimli Giblet, and Gandalf Gandy Eowyn solemnly informed me that it was time for her cousin's funeral. Well that shut me up and I nodded solemnly before following my companions out of the golden halls and down to the crowds waiting for the burial of their heir.
So we walked down to the big mound where Theodred was about to be buried in and joined the villagers that were waiting. The body of Theodred was carried down on a bier and the king and Eowyn followed, looking very sad. I couldn't help but feel sorry for Eomer, Theodred was his cousin as well but he wasn't there because he had been banished. So the body was placed in the mound and Eowyn began to sing a lament for her cousin.
I felt tears coming into my eyes, something which surprised me as I don't cry very often. Looking around I saw that Elanor was crying floods, something which didn't surprise me because despite her bloodthirsty nature she actually cries very easily. Elin looked sad, and even Lauren looked more solemn than usual, despite the fact that she was muttering about how he was only a fictional character so there was no need to be upset.
Well the funeral was over soon, and everyone, barring Gandalf and Théoden left the mound, most of us sniffing or at least looking sad.
(Ok I realise that that chapter really wasn't funny, but I just couldn't see anyway of making it funny so this was the result. I would also like to say that IT'S THE HOLIDAYS, WOOHOO, sorry, it wasn't the holidays when I started this chapter so I didn't say it then but it is now officially the holidays. Its also my birthday in three days, yay, presents. Though due to bank holidays, Sundays and work I wont be able to put this chapter up before my birthday so it would have passed by the time you read this. Doesn't matter though, you all know now. Not that I think many of you will actually care but meh on the off chance that any of you were interested...ok I'll stop babbling now, Namarie mellyn.