Chapter 3: - Awakening

"It had been a long time since I was with someone before you" he said softly as he gently stroked her arm with a single finger. Once again he had stopped her from leaving that night his weight pressing her down onto the bed as he stayed within her and he held her close. He had never spoken this much to her in the past when they were together and Isabeau found that this talkativeness slightly annoyed her. She tried to release herself but he wouldn't let her move, he continued to speak almost as though he was oblivious to her unease at his words.

"I've very rarely wanted anything as much as I have wanted you, I often find myself counting the hours until we are together" he was now staring rapturously at her face trying to make eye contact, but Isabeau turned her head to one side avoiding is gaze.

There were two things that Isabeau refused to allow him to do when they where together, kissing on the lips and making eye contact. Isabeau believed that these things conveyed too much passion and by having passion in this twisted relationship, Isabeau knew it would mean that she and Snape would truly be making love instead of just having sex. Sex Isabeau deduced was something done by anyone, by animals and by humans a like, it was an instinctual thing that just naturally happened, the survival of the fittest and the dominating of one being over another. Love was different, Isabeau never thought much about love or being in love, she would see her peers walking around the castle halls holding hands and giggling with their boyfriends or girlfriends both parties claiming that they unquestioningly loved the other purely because the word was so disposable and jaded. The word alone was able to quell the most heated argument and satisfy the most wanton lies even if there wasn't any truth behind the word.

Isabeau believed that love was more then just a word which could be used and exchanged like currency, to Isabeau love was a feeling, an undying ever existing being that would forever remain in your soul, building your very existence. Love was being so much a part of another's life that it was hard to distinguish yourself from them. Love, Isabeau believed had no bounds in life or in death.

Not wanting to show love or passion was also the reason why she always tried to speak to him politely by calling him 'Sir' she had only ever once called him Severus and that was during their first time together, at that time Isabeau had been new to Hogwarts she had been scared, she was in a strange school and hadn't fully grieved for her lost life or mother. Snape had been her last chance to cling to something that reminded her of both. Back then in his embrace she still could pretend her life was normal, that he loved her and that her world was still complete. Back then it was Isabeau that didn't want to leave his bedchamber in the early hours, who wanted to cling to him in the hopes that he could some how rectify the wrongs she had committed. But now she knew better and so preferred to remain as detached as possible from him, and by calling him 'Sir' and refusing to be kissed and not making eye contact made it easy for her to stay isolated from him as he penetrated her and writhed on top of her.

"It is three weeks until your graduation." he said continuing his talk as he stated the obvious, his voice sounding like that which a father would use towards his child as he made plans about their future "Three weeks till you are no longer a student at this school and I will no longer be your teacher. I am curious as to what you plan to do after you graduate?"

"Get drunk I suppose!" Isabeau laughed dryly not wanting him to continue, for she could guess what this line of questioning was leading to.

He laughed as he leaned into her cheek and kissed it gently, Isabeau became very rigid, she knew what he was trying to do but she wouldn't let him,

"I should leave, sir" She stated plainly as she once again tried to move but once again he wouldn't allow her too.

"Would it be so bad if this continued?" He made it sound like a question but Isabeau knew he wanted no reply, not yet anyway "I am not overly wealthy but I can offer you so much more then you have now. A home, a life, and maybe with a bit of time even a family of our own"

Isabeau's stomach lurched, and her eyes widened, she had been expecting this for some time now, even though she had done her utmost to dissuade him. Throughout her life Isabeau had been dependent on one person, her mother, everything that she had owned and her life at Beauxbatons had all been taken for granted. And so now she refused to be placed in the same situation where her life revolved around one individual that promised to provide her the world, only to have her life and dreams snatched from her once more. Not that Isabeau dreamed of anything these days or valued the life that she now lived.

It wasn't that she didn't pray for an end to her pain, for the storm that raged inside her to finally break and to allow her to move on with her life, because she did. But it was hard for the storms to fade when secretly she clung to the pain within her because she truly believed she should be punished. Isabeau knew that she was the main reason why her mother was no longer with her, why she had to now reside in a school of minimal grandeur and why she allowed him to satisfy himself with her most nights, knowing that he had once been her mothers lover! Maybe she owed it to him? Maybe all the nights that they had spent together were Isabeau's way of repaying him for that loss?

'But that!' Isabeau thought angrily as she pushed him off her and finally tore herself free, 'Didn't mean that he could presume such things!!!' she shook off his hand as he tried to grab her and quickly seized her robes as she fled his quarters.