Disclaimer: I still own nothing but the plot.
Review Responses:
PippinsMyHobbit - I'm glad you liked my first chapter! The title I sadly can't take credit for as it was the idea of my wonderful friend and fellow writer, honestiago. Thanks for the review!
Poppy Brook - Thanks for reading this, I'm so pleased you like it especially as I thought you didn't much like HP slash. Thank you reviewing!
Maglor - I'm pleased you think they're in character, it bugs me when people make Snape too soft! Thanks for reviewing!
idril.tinuviel - Thanks for saying they're in character, I'll definately keep going and thank you for the review!
AffectedMangoO - Hope you dind't think the update took too long, thanks for the review!
aya mikage8 - I'm very fond of Sev's dark side, I do think he's got a good one too but his dark side is so appealing! Glad you're addicted because frankly I'm addicted to reviews! Thanks for reviewing!
Shades of Grey
Remus' Thoughts
Emphasis
Chapter 2
It was almost a week before Severus crossed Remus' mind again. He had been immersed in writing to Harry and it was only when the letter was finally finished and sent and Remus was waiting for a reply that he suddenly realised how lonely it was at Grimmauld Place without Sirius. Of course the Weasleys were there, being as noisy as ever, and Molly was fussing over him at every available moment in a manner which irritated him greatly. Even they seemed busy with other things though, namely attempting to reconcile with their son, despite his cold demeanour that Remus had a feeling probably sprang from his feeling a little silly for having been so wrong. The Weasley's problems though, entertaining as they occasionally were when Fred and George were involved, were not enough of a distraction to keep his mind from dwelling too long on the fact that he missed his friend terribly.
It was odd but the first person his mind sprang to on the search for company was Severus Snape and once he had begun thinking about him Remus found it difficult to stop. There was something intriguing about him that held the werewolf's attention. His memory kept being drawn to the conversation in his private rooms at Hogwarts and how it had ended. Remus remembered the sheer power that he'd felt from the other man when the potions jar had flown at him. Uncontrolled wandless magic was a rare occurrence in witches and wizards above the age at which they acquired a wand and began to learn to focus their magic and it was clear that Severus had to be a lot more powerful than Remus had previously realised. It was also clear that the man did indeed feel guilt for a past he couldn't seem to let go of and that bothered Remus. He had no desire to watch Severus suffer anymore.
He had just decided to go and pay the man another visit to apologise for the previous one when there was a knock at the door of his room.
"Come in," Remus called.
"Hiya Remus." Nymphadora Tonks, now with green and pink hair burst into the room with her usual amount of noise and energy, "Moody and I are following Dung to the Leaky Cauldron, he says he's got a business deal on and Moody wants to keep an eye on him, said to ask if you wanted to come."
"Thanks Tonks, but I've got plans," Remus politely declined.
"Oh? What you doing?" she asked curiously.
"Nothing much. I just thought I'd go and visit Severus."
"Snape? Crikey! Rather you than me! He's in a foul mood."
"You've seen him?" Remus asked eagerly.
"No I just know he will be, namely because he always is. You'd have much more fun with us!"
"Sorry Tonks, I want to see him."
"Well your loss mate. If we don't come back tonight I'll be helping Moody bury a body 'cos he's lost it with Dung!" She laughed and waved, backing out of the door, "See ya!"
The door swung to afterwards and Remus breathed a sigh of relief, the girl had more energy than he could handle and her hairstyles were fast becoming less endearingly eccentric and more of an eyesore. He wondered if criticising the hairstyles of the young was a sign of encroaching middle age.
Oh well, may as well go and find someone of my own age to talk to. At least Severus won't have neon hair, even he if he does try to kill me on sight.
XXXXXXX
Severus certainly did look capable of striking Remus dead when he opened the door of his office to find the werewolf stood outside, and the other man was profoundly grateful Snape's wand was resting on the desk. It was perhaps this gratitude he would later reflect that led to him pushing the issue.
He grinned, "Surprised to see you answering the door without your wand in your hand, you normally always have it ready to take someone's head off."
"I have no desire to become Alastor 'I'm a paranoid psychopath' Moody, however had I known it was you on the other side of the door I would undoubtedly have picked my wand up before I answered it."
"It's nice that we can banter like this after all these years."
Severus didn't look like he thought was nice, "What do you want, Lupin?"
"I wanted to apologise. Again."
Snape raised an eyebrow.
"So, sorry for what I said and the previous comments," Remus continued. "We seem to find it awfully difficult to speak to each other without getting insulting."
"Is it difficult to do that? I've never tried to speak to you without getting insulting so I wouldn't know."
"No. You wouldn't, would you?"
"Lupin, what is the new desire to apologise to me all about? You're not on a twelve step program to giving up human blood are you?"
"I'm a werewolf Severus we don't drink blood and frankly that's a bit rich coming from someone who swoops around like a vampire bat!"
Severus scowled.
"I was joking Severus, can't you laugh?"
"When something's funny. For example should you ever drop dead I shall certainly start laughing."
"I thought you said you'd seen enough death."
"I could make an exception just for you."
"Are you going to let me in or are we going to stand in the doorway all afternoon?"
"Neither. I am going to shut the door and then you are going to go away."
"I'll take that as a 'please come in'." Remus ducked under the taller man's arm and sat down in the chair across from Severus' heavy carved oak desk.
"What are you doing here?!" Severus snapped, seeming fairly outraged that Remus had just strolled into his office as though he thought he had every right to be there.
"I told you, I came to apologise."
Severus seemed to fighting to control the instinct to kill the other man. "Well you've done that, so you can leave."
"Alright," Remus confessed, "I had an ulterior motive."
A resigned look crossed the potions master's face as he closed the door and sat down, "What?" he sighed.
Remus looked uncomfortably at the desk, "It's a bit lonely at Grimmauld Place."
"There's a whole army of Weasleys there, not to mention half the Order of the Phoenix!" Severus snapped, before turning his attention to the papers on his desk, clearly in the hopes that if he ignored him Remus would go away.
"The Weasleys don't really need anyone else and the Order..." Remus trailed off, not wanting to say that nothing was the same without Sirius.
Severus looked up from his papers suddenly, "So what on earth brought you here?"
"You."
Severus frowned, "I don't understand."
"Look Severus, we're not exactly old friends..."
"'Not exactly', don't you mean just 'we're not'?"
"Severus, how many people have we seen die? Friends, relatives, people we cared for. I just thought that maybe you might be as lonely as I was."
Severus looked like he was torn between telling the werewolf where to go and simply killing him. "No, I'm not. Even if I were, you would not be my first choice of company."
Remus refused to give up, "I can understand that. Look, would it kill you to have a drink with me?"
"A drink?"
"That's all I'm here for."
"And then you'll leave without any further stupidity or any more ludicrous sob stories which I wouldn't care about even if they were true."
"Yes, I'll leave and they are true."
Severus sighed and tugged on a bell pull. A house elf instantly apparated into the room, giving Severus a look of clear intimidation. "Well what do you want?" Severus snapped.
"I's not knowing sir, yous is summoning me sos I comes, I is thinking you knew what I was wanted to do."
"Not you!" Severus growled at the unfortunate elf. "The other non-human creature in this room."
Remus chuckled slightly at the fed up expression on the man's face, "I'll have an English breakfast tea with milk and two sugars and Severus..."
"Earl Grey tea, black with lemon."
The elf nodded quickly and disappeared, returning moments later with a tray which it deposited on the table, before executing a little bow and disappearing.
The two men both stared at their tea for a few minutes until Remus started to speak again, "See, this isn't too bad is it?"
Severus snorted.
"How's your tea?" Remus asked.
The other man raised an eyebrow.
"Have you lost the power of speech or are you just hoping if you don't let me provoke you I'll go away?"
"Lupin, drink your tea and get out of here!"
"The idea of having a cup of tea with you was for there to be conversation."
Severus remained silent.
"Have they filled the Defence Against the Dark Arts post yet for next year?" Remus asked in another attempt at conversation.
"Not that I know of. I thought Dumbledore was going to offer it to you."
This was surprising news to Remus, "Really? I would have thought the ministry wouldn't have let him!"
"They knew last time he did it, and since when has the Headmaster ever listened to the ministry?"
"Good point. What makes you think he'd offer it to me again though?"
"He mentioned that he might. I believe he was trying to provoke conversation, much like you're doing now."
"You don't much like people doing that do you?"
"How did you guess?" Severus asked sarcastically.
"Just call me intuitive."
"I can think of things I'd rather call you."
Silence reigned once more and Remus took the opportunity to study the man in front of him. Severus Snape was slightly taller than he was, indeed he was taller than most, and he used his extra height to his full advantage when intimidating people but at the moment he looked more tired than intimidating. There were black smudges under his eyes, emphasising his pale skin. His slender figure was leaning on the desk more than usual as though glad of the extra support and Remus' heart went out to him as he began to realise how tired Severus clearly was.
"Are you alright?" The question slipped out before Remus could stop himself.
"Why?" Severus snapped.
"You look tired."
"I am tired, I'm very busy and a certain idiot keeps interrupting me!"
Remus smiled playfully, "Just tell me who he is and I'll make sure he doesn't bother you anymore!"
Severus sighed and Remus found himself wanting to reach out to him, place a hand on his arm or brush his hair back from his face as it fell down almost like a screen between Severus and the outside world. Anything, just to let Severus know that he cared and that he wasn't there simply to try to make the man's already difficult life that much harder. Reaching out physically though was probably not an option, Severus would probably accuse him of trying to spread his fleas or something.
"I'm sorry if I'm disturbing you. I just wanted some company and I thought you might too," Remus spoke softly, "Maybe you should go to bed and get some sleep, you look like you need it."
Surprise registered briefly in the dark eyes, as though concern for his welfare wasn't something he was used to hearing. It was quickly quelled though and his eyes became as unreadable as ever, "I'm fine thank you."
The cutting edge had gone from his voice, Remus was gratified to note, though whether that was because he was learning to tolerate the werewolf's presence or because he was too tired to care was uncertain.
"Is there another meeting next week?"
"Yes I think so, you'll have to check with Dumbledore." Severus was quiet for a minute, "Oh and I've been working on making the alterations to the Wolfsbane in order to prevent you feeling so bad afterwards, it's not ready yet but I'll bring you it at the full moon and hopefully it will work."
"Thank you," Remus was genuinely grateful for Severus' efforts, "It's very good of you to take your time over that for me."
Severus looked uncomfortable and shrugged, "I had some time and it will help the Order, you're no use if you have to lie around for days trying to get over your monthly condition."
"I suppose not, still it was good of you to try and help."
"Forget it, Lupin." Severus snapped impatiently.
"You don't like it when people start to realise you're nice underneath it all do you?" Remus teased.
"If you mean I don't like people who are delusional then no, I don't."
"You're not half as evil as you like to make out you are."
"No, I'm worse."
Remus' laugh died in his throat at the serious expression on the other man's face, "No you're not."
Severus simply ignored him and went back to staring at his tea.
They sat in a strangely companionable silence for a few minutes longer while Remus finished his tea. He set down the cup and stood, "I'll leave you in peace. You really should get some rest, you look exhausted."
"I can't afford to rest, I have things to do."
"Surely they can wait."
"No they can't." The man's tone conveyed that this line of conversation should be pursued no further and Remus had a nasty suspicion that whatever it was that Severus had to do it had something to do with keeping Voldemort happy and not suspicious.
"Well, thanks for this afternoon Severus."
"This does not make us friends, it does not even mean I wish you slightly less harm than I did this morning. Because I don't."
"Understood. We should do this again sometime."
"Yes do feel free to drop round any time hell freezes over."
Remus couldn't hold back a smile, "When the welcome and hospitality are so warm and the company so inviting how, could I resist?"
"Try."
Remus chuckled and allowed himself to be herded out of the door, "Goodbye Severus."
"Goodbye." The door shut suddenly without another word leaving Remus stood in the hallway feeling amused and slightly less alone than he had.
Chapter three will be here next week. Please review, I'm addicted to them!